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Has you're past been effecting you?


RainbowDashiscool

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Has you're past been effecting you?,You can tell me you're past what happened.

 

I have a past that has been effecting me since I became 16 year's old and I'm currently 16 in a half but probaly my past started too effect me when I was 13 year's old.

 

If anyone wants too help,Us too stop are past from effecting us then you may help :).

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The past good to learn from but not to bring you down. I have a hard time letting go of past memories whether they being good ones of old friends and people I once knew but know now all that is in the past. Its good to reminisce but stay in the past too long and you could be missing out on the golden times you can be having in the here and now.

 

Knowing others past experiences and knowing that others have had to go through much harder things than me helps motivate me even more though like to refocus and move forward. Its good to realize what others might be going through and always encourage others and such you know :)

 

Thats just me though 

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Nope. I have no desire to dredge upon my misguided past. 

 

So..."Let your past make you better, not bitter." ..I believe the saying goes...  ^_^

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(edited)

The past good to learn from but not to bring you down. I have a hard time letting go of past memories whether they being good ones of old friends and people I once knew but know now all that is in the past. Its good to reminisce but stay in the past too long and you could be missing out on the golden times you can be having in the here and now.

 

Knowing others past experiences and knowing that others have had to go through much harder things than me helps motivate me even more though like to refocus and move forward. Its good to realize what others might be going through and always encourage others and such you know :)

 

Thats just me though 

We'll at least you remember good past memories,I have some good past memories but the sad past memories of mine have been effecting me and it is hard letting go and fixing the problem for me my mom is my main problem...I'm still glad you remember you're good past memories  :).

Nope. I have no desire to dredge upon my misguided past. 

 

So..."Let your past make you better, not bitter." ..I believe the saying goes...  ^_^

We'll thats good :),Sometimes it makes others bitter if it's hard too fix the problem if it's a bitter one.

Edited by Felicia
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We'll at least you remember good past memories,I have some good past memories but the sad past memories of mine have been effecting me and it is hard letting go and fixing the problem for me my mom is my main problem...I'm still glad you remember you're good past memories

 

True but if its something your past that still eats away at you or you struggle with. Holding onto things only make it worse.. its like you gotta make peace with your past. Sure there might be scars but at least you can know whatever happened is in the past.

 

I know some people in my family have held onto grudges against other family members and its affected them. Its hard to face the past depending on what it may be but being able to destroy a ball and chain is the best thing you can do.

 

But yeah the past is a good teacher that is for sure and acknowledging what others go through or have gone through can be beneficial.  I always respect others when they encourage others that may be going through alot cause you will never know what another has gone through you know?

 

If you have bad memories that trouble you best to talk to someone you trust well talking things out with one another, at least for me helps out so much, but yeah hope you can get at ease with what has been troubling you

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i did some stupid shit in front of an online friend (who is like 10 years or more older than me) that probably left me looking like an underage.

 

he still talk n shit but iunno if he still thinks about that.

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For years I held on to what people said about me and brought it with me for the majority of my childhood. I held a grudge on my dad for years on end for all the things he did to me and my brother. And we had to deal with being poor for a long time. It was harsh and it did effect me for a long time. But I eventually let go of everything, I now take care of my dad, I don't take things as seriously and I don't allow myself to be bullied by the world and love everyone! To me, it was all trial and error! I'm a happy person now!

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I won't go into too many details, but i had a bit of a dark side going on. I had a lot of anger and malice pent up in me as i grew up - it led me to do some poor life choices, especially during puberty. I did so many things i wish i could take back - but i'm determined not to regress to my old ways, and to amend my life.

 

I've found serenity and peace in me, which placed me on the road to recovery, as one would say. That being said, there's not a waking moment when i'm not haunted by memories of my past - i just face it, one demon at a time.

Edited by Terminus
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i keep dreaming about this one girl from highschool, i really want the dreams to stop. I keep thinking about her and it feels so haunting. I really liked her, but i left on such bad terms and it's just gnawing at me. So yeah, something from my past is really affecting me, it's late at night and i want to go to sleep, but i'm afraid to dream about her again.

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I had a best friend growing up and we had a falling out a few years ago.  We havn't spoken since, but I still have dreams where I chew her out on our issues or make up. It makes me feel relieved when Im dreaming, but then I wake up and realize we are still where we left off.  In all honesty, its probably better that we arent friends anymore (I and my family keep telling me anyway) but since we were so close for so long it still hurts me every time I think about it.

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The past is going to affect you, whether it be positively, or negatively. Whether you realize it or not, your experiences shape who you are to some degree or another.

 

Whether you let particular things affect you can be determined to an extent though. Whether you will dwell on something is mostly up to you.

 

I wouldn't say that the past is bad and you shouldn't look at it, nor would I say the future is bad to look at either, I think both are ok to look at, just don't look at it too long, to much can become bad, and can distort and ruin your present.

 

So yes, my past affects me to some extent, as far as stuff I remember and feel remorse or regret, sure, I have plenty of things, I don't always think about them, but I do at times, and they can bring me down, the past is hard to leave behind sometimes, but I'm trying my best.

 

I've done some stupid crap in the past, but I think dwelling on it will no longer help me, and thus I feel it is best to move on, but the actual moving on will require some work for sure.

 

I'm trying though.

 

And to everyone else here being affected by something in your past, your not alone, keep trucking on.

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Ever since I've had people in my high school hurt me and verbally abuse me, I've had trust issues, especially with girls. I can still be warm towards other people and tell people some of my inner thoughts and feelings, but I could never trust that a friendship would last very long. I've also recently seen my friends move past me after I graduated from high school and university, which made me feel that I was unsuited for maintaining friendships and relationships in the long term. Even now, I have this fear in my heart, but it's been slowly eaten away now that I'm starting to understand the meaning of love and trust in others. It's still a huge obstacle I have to get past, but I feel that with time, I can find a friendship that will last in the long run. 

 

I also have to mention that my faith in romance has also faded because of all the mishaps I went through with regards to crushes in the past. It's also made me pessimistic about being able to find romance in life. With this, I realize that romance isn't the most important thing in my life as I already have much success in music and academics, both of which are also very important to me and my life. 

 

Over time, I'm slowly prying away and reconciling with my past in hopes of removing these negative thoughts, but I know it'll take a long time to do so. At the end of the day, I realize... I just need more faith and trust that things will go well and that I can find a lasting friendship and romance at the same time.

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Nope. I have no desire to dredge upon my misguided past. 

 

So..."Let your past make you better, not bitter." ..I believe the saying goes...  ^_^

I fully concur with Stormfury on this. I let go of my past and focus ahead. Yet, what happened in the past should not put you down but empower you to go beyond.
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I find comfort in the classical poems and this fits how I feel:

 

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

 

the road not taken by robert frost

 

I never had a easy path in any thing in life but

I have found that it has made me a good person, and enriched my

life when it comes to having true friends and those i call family.

 

Yes the choice of the easy path looks well easy and not being hurt

and the rougher,  some things and souls you might lose but the

end of that path you will find one's self a more enriched person soul wise

and friend wise in one life time.
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I had a best friend growing up and we had a falling out a few years ago. We havn't spoken since, but I still have dreams where I chew her out on our issues or make up. It makes me feel relieved when Im dreaming, but then I wake up and realize we are still where we left off. In all honesty, its probably better that we arent friends anymore (I and my family keep telling me anyway) but since we were so close for so long it still hurts me every time I think about it.

Sounds like an exact thing that happened to me too. -_- I try to move past it, but somehow, it always comes up. I felt like I wanted friendship again for so long and tally regretted everything I did. I do still regret all of it, I just mean that, recently, I'm packing my room up to move out, and found a bunch more old things of hers, as well as journals I wrote after we stopped being friends. The stuff I wrote was so depressing and upsetting I couldn't help but feel angry and hurt all over again. But I don't want so much negativity in my life anymore even though people warn me to just forget about it & not feel anything about it. I guess I just don't know how to feel about it anymore, but it haunts me even now and probably will forever. I regret what was lost and what I did to bring it about but I still couldn't believe what ultimately ended up happening and how I found out years of friendship was actually a lie... :( I'm getting distracted by the thought of it now...it's so very depressing.

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This topic might bring me to write down my whole life. I'm not someone to express myself to people wholeheartedly, I've only trusted someone but I think I let myself go from that person.
All I can say now is that all that has happened to me will change me forever and I will never forget it. 

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Not at all because I don't live in the past like some people do, If something bothered me back then I'd fix it but then again I'll just forget about it and move on towards the future.

 

I don't like people who live in the past too much, Just saying.

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Unfortunately, yeah.

 

I had a close online friend who disappeared and cut contact with all his forum friends last year. We talked about serious life issues like our dysfunctional childhoods and even worked on creative projects together, with him illustrating what I wrote. I thought he’d committed suicide initially because of the way he’d been talking.

 

I have a few new online friends now, but I find it hard to trust anyone in quite the same way or involve them in my projects. Every time I try I just think of the last time and how wrong I was about someone I'd been close enough to for exchanging handwritten letters. Still too early, I guess…

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I believe you mean 'affecting'. And well, sort of. Bad things happen, but there's no sense dwelling on the past. The past is the past and there's no way to change it.

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  • 2 weeks later...

yes I hate my past I try to forget my past and move on with my life but then unwanted memories just pop up in my head and they won't leave me alone

 

but in other ways no my past hasn't done much to me since I move a lot and the people I'm around never knew me as a child

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I have a hard time letting go things from the past so I guess in a way it does effect me... Memories and other things are just the one thing that is the hardest to let go as well as friends.. I know people always say "well if they drag you down its always for the better" but what about all those times they lifted you up and helped you through most of your problems? Why let go of someone who main purpose to help you instead of letting you down? But at the same time they do that too? People sometime hold the bad over the good.

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Absolutely.

 

After being in a physically abusive relationship and being assaulted, I still suffer from PTSD. 4 years later.

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