By the first partition whereupon Miss Sparkle "is not impressed", I am very pleased with the inclination of how well written it is, so it gets a pass. However the dark tonality is making itself quite felt, and I do not know if it's going to be a happy ending, which is concerning me slightly.
It depends on what your definition of happy is. I was a bit so-so on using the tag 'dark' because it conjours up unwanted imagery, but it is dark in places, and it would probably be unfair to have some read it who thinks it will be happy clappy.
That said, it's not grimdark or 'horrible' by any stretch of the imagination. I'm not a fan of stories with lots of blood or guts, or horrid for the sake of being horrid. There needs to be a good reason if you use such things.
I'd class it as bittersweet in the end, I think. A happy ending, of a sort.
The tone is now egregiously non-canon with the exaggeration of flaws in the characters- or at least Rainbow Dash's egotism and Twilight's dismissiveness thereof.
Mmmm maybe. I do admit sometimes I turn the characters up a few notches, but then again so does the show. Rainbow Dash's egotism tends to fluctuate depending on which episode it is.
On the same subject, I wrote a fic a while ago, Twilight's Last Gleaming, which centred around Twilight going too far in an April Fools day prank. Lots of people said that was out of character and she wouldn't go that far at all, and then Lesson Zero aired in which she went much much further, my goodness!
Okay resume where I was. ~ Need to lay off the coffee. ~ ~ I will be reading this in entirety. Congratulations, you've won a Good Prize in my Fan-fiction classification system.
Thanks, I'd be interested to hear what you think once you've read it all!