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HomicidalFrog

Muffin
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About HomicidalFrog

  • Birthday 1992-10-18

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  • Gender
    Not Telling
  • Location
    Liverpool, England, United Kingdom (in case you get it mixed up with some OTHER England.)
  • Personal Motto
    Difficulties be Damned

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My Little Pony

  • Best Anthropomorphic FiM Race
    Pegasus

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  1. Christmas is a scam and you all know it.

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Smarts

      Smarts

      U jus mad cuz u didnt git anythin! Lolololololololol

    3. HomicidalFrog

      HomicidalFrog

      This status is like eons old. How dare you comment on it.

    4. Smarts

      Smarts

      lel suk mah dik.

  2. ((OOC: Apologies for the delay.)) @legionbrony Unfortunately for Silver, a palace guard did see the bedding get dunked into the bucket. She scanned her surroundings to see if anyone was around, and thankfully, they were alone. "Psst", she whispered "Hey, you. Listen, I'm a friend. My name is Cloaked Dagger and I work for someone who has need for your..particular talents." In truth, this "someone" only needed a slave with some basic combat training who he can trust. This could be any of the ex-guard unicorns currently still living and now enslaved or in hiding. Silver Shield just got the "lucky" straw. "But first, we need to get you out of here." She offered "What do you say to that?" and gave a sinister looking grin. @NoodleBrony A fat, slovenly looking Pegasus with a thick, scruffy moustache and a bowler hat rolled into town with his cart attached to his back. He halted outside of a small cafe, eyeing the sign. He parked his cart outside the entrance and moseyed on inside. He sat down on a chair and gave a relaxing sigh, enjoying resting his weary bones and politely awaiting for someone to take his order. Interestingly, he had a large eyeball for a cutie mark.
  3. Humbug

    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. 碇 シンジン
    3. HomicidalFrog

      HomicidalFrog

      I'd do it myself, but I've been banned from Finland and the Finnish military wouldn't hesitate to kill me on sight after last time.

    4. 碇 シンジン
  4. Severe ice pellets outside. Ground is covered in tiny ice rocks. All on a Christmas morning. Bah, humbug.

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. HomicidalFrog

      HomicidalFrog

      Why aren't you on Steam?

    3. Mand'alor Dash

      Mand'alor Dash

      Fucker crashed. I'll be on in the morning.

    4. HomicidalFrog

      HomicidalFrog

      In civilized countries, it is the morning! >:L

  5. The patrons just kept their conversations going, though anyone speaking of Celestia, Luna, Lady Rose, the state, Class A citizens or anything related to them quickly changed subjects as soon as the guards walked through the doors. The bartender nodded at the guards. "I'm afraid, good officers, that I've never even heard such a name spoken in this room." (Which wasn't really a lie when you think about it.) "But I assure you, if I hear anything, I'll let Equestria's Finest know." Now THAT was a lie. He winked at them while cleaning his filthy rag. This was of course, all rehearsed. Over and over and over again. The phrasing is different and of course, when it was being rehearsed he didn't say a name. Broken Paw has always been paranoid about guards coming in here. He knows this entire operation, and himself, is on borrowed time. Broken Paw was in the hallway when they came in and could hear their voices. He nervously walked into his quarters and put on a large wooden cover, looking identical to the wall around it, over his door, in case they walk through. If they come in, all they'll see is a filthy hallway, the bartender's meagre room and of course, the brewery room to the right. Broken Paw gulped and hoped that the guards don't actually know Ruby Ruse was here. The door cover wouldn't fool them in a serious raid. Hopefully, they're just visiting local businesses and houses in an area she's believed to have been in the hope somepony saw something. "So can I get you two anything? Cider? Porridge? Vegetable stew?" Steel Jaw asked, hoping to appear friendly and get their minds off what they're here for.
  6. ((OOC: Apologies in advance for the oversized as all heck intro. I uh, promise my posts won't be be even 1/8 of the size of my introduction.Honest! )) The Old Crown, Canterlot. Ruby Ruse entered the rather nondescript, filthy looking tavern with a mix of caution and navel-gazing disgust, she's never been in so common an establishment in all her life. As she walked in, the once loud, cheerful tavern immediately went quiet as all conversations and merry-making was hushed as all the patrons, in unison, like some unholy hive mind, swivelled their heads like owls to face her. The second she walked in, the blue collar patrons sensed there was an "outsider" amongst them, disturbing their jests, shanties and bawdy tales. Their graying beards, scruffy manes and dull coloured coats striking a sharp contrast to the manicured hooves, youthful vigour, luxuriously styled mane and bright, vibrant maroon coat of the very obviously Class A lady before them. This was someone who had no business here. In response, Ruby shot her nose straight up in the air and walked gingerly towards the huge, mean looking Earth pony giving her the evil eye from across the room, washing a grimy looking mug with a filthy rag, despite the rag being far dirtier than the mug. Ruby considers for a moment that he may actually be trying to clean the rag with the mug. As she brings herself to the bar, the intimidating bartender spits on the rag (with more than a little mucus in the spit) and says "Wha' is it?" This rude attitude would seem unusual if one didn't know the story of this particular tavern. Any other tavern would have a bartender that is friendly and welcoming, this particular bartender, is crass and anti-social. This is intentional. For this tavern tries to avoid attention and having any customers that aren't the middle aged and elderly regulars. There was a large, sinister looking burnt wood club perched on the counter behind him, she noticed. There looks to be nails crudely hammered into it. On further inspection, those nails appear to be covered in old blood stains. "Um, I'm sorry but uh" Ruby Ruse gulped. Hard. She's forgotten the password. Damn, is it hot in here. It's too damn sunny... THE SUN! "The Sun and Moon will rise tomorrow" Somehow, the patrons, still keeping their eyes perched to the lady and not letting out even a murmur, got quieter. The bartender put the mug down and seemingly stared into her soul for a long, uncomfortable moment. "Behind the bar, through the door, on your left." He walked to his right and unlocked the backroom door. She nervously and slowly walked around the bar, still under the piercing, threatening gaze of the entire room and walked down a dark, damp hallway. As soon as she was out of sight of them, the patrons continued their loud socializing, drinking and gambling. Cockroaches, including one she could swear was the size of a kitten, scattered into small holes in the walls as she approached. At the end of the dark hallway was a door to the left. She braced herself, took a deep breath and knocked on the door lightly. Knock. Knock. Knock. For another long, nerve-wrecking moment, nothing happened. Then a quiet, but strong voice echoed from within. "It's open." The voice was surprisingly smooth. Refined even. Especially when compared to the harsh, bellowing baritone that came from the barrel-chested bartender. Opening the door, the first thing she couldn't help but notice is that this room is positively immaculate and finely furnished, with a few gilded bookshelves in one corner, an extravagant, mahogany desk at the back, old looking paintings that are probably worth more than the entire street the inn is located in. A red, rich velvet rug lays on the ground tastefully and an ancient looking grandfather clock stands against a wall. Some of the tomes and scrolls in the bookshelves look like they would crumble into dust if she even went over and touched them. And near the bookshelves, stood a tall stallion with a grey-white coat and a shaved, silvery mane. He was wearing a cheap looking dark grey flat cap and had a cloak hanged on a coat rack. His mane was shaved boot camp style with a silver and grey tail following behind him. He was putting away a book "On The Horns of Unicorns", by Starswirl the Bearded. Odd choice of book for an Earth pony, Ruby Ruse could swear she's seen that a copy of that book at the palace, only it was burned by the guards recently. The silver pony walked from the bookshelf and sat behind his desk. "Please, madam, sit down." His tone had the hint of sophistication and class in it. It was formal, but not at all friendly. Deep silver eyes followed her around the room, making an unknown judgement of some kind. Ruby Ruse cleared her throat and introduced herself "...H-Hello, my name is, wel-" "Ruby Ruse. Class A citizen. Married to one of Rose's disgusting sycophants. Currently a fugitive from the law." He answered, his face expressionless. But his silver irises were narrow and shiny. Like the points of blades. "Let us...skip the formalities, I *did* contact you, after all." True enough, Ruby Ruse was not so long ago married to a prominent member of Lady Rose's council. Brown Muzzler. That is, until she ended up pregnant. While the husband was ecstatic at first to have his first child. The heir to his fortune and power, his joyful attitude soured slightly when he noticed the foal has a pair of wings. As it turned out, Ruby Ruse *hated* being married to a fat, old, miserly creature like him. And who could blame her? It was an arranged marriage between her parents and him. An alliance proposal between two Class A families. So, she may have accidentally sort of but not really been seduced by a handsome Pegasi butler. Needless to say, the Pegasi in question has been immediately put to death and Ruby and her child barely escaped with their lives. The sycophant now wants both dead, she's wanted by the Equestrian authorities and Brown Muzzler has only gone and put out a large price on her head. And a bigger one on the newly born foal. If it weren't for a young courier telling her to seek help in The Old Crown, give her directions to it and tell her the pass-phrase, she'd probably be dead by now. Broken Paw is the one who contacts people who could use his help, not the other way around. In truth, it would seem odd that a pony like Broken Paw, so fiercely hateful of Lady Rose and Class A ponies and everything they stand for, would help Ruby Ruse. But, as it turns out, Broken Paw's eyes have told his ears which then told his hands that Ruby Ruse before she left cracked one of Brown Muzzler's safes and took out a huge amount of bits. Okay, maybe not *huge* to a Class A pony, but to most people it's a really large amount. And tartarus, it's a decent amount for a Class A pony too. "You need out of the city, Tartarus, you probably need out of the country all together. Maybe some disguises, subtle transportation. New identification needs to be made to fit your disguises while you flee the country." "...And you can do all that?" Ruby Ruse inquired anxiously. "I know everyone in this city worth knowing. That is all I'm going to say of that." Paw paused. "In fact, I even know a few people outside the city worth knowing." He was, of course, alluding to the tiny ring of smugglers, bureaucrats, ship captains and wagon drivers who get anonymously sent bags of coins from him in return for certain favours. In addition to a small but regular retainer fee. Broken Paw read the confusion spreading across her face like a book. "*Sigh* What I mean is: I can point you towards the right people in exchange for a price, for my own profit, but I'll also be handing them their share. They are trustworthy and highly reliable. I've worked with them for a long time now. You have my word they will fulfil their end of the bargain to the very letter." "And for how much exactly?" "Ten thousand." Ruby's eyes grew wide with disbelief "Wha- that is-" "Exactly the amount you've taken, I'm aware." This stallion seems to have terrifyingly good sources of intelligence. "I assure you, most of it is for my contacts. 500 bits for the disguises, another 2000 for the IDs, 4000 for the smuggling and transportation and of course 3500 bits for me." To any other pony, such a steep cost may seem deeply unfair and more than a little exploitive. But Ruby Ruse has often used her influence in court to speak for even harsher treatment for unicorns, pegasi, non-ponies and to some extent, even Class B Earth ponies. Thankfully, Lady Rose has seemingly never even noticed her existence. As it were, Broken Paw usually this does kind of thing for free except for ponies he knows can afford it or just for ponies he has, for whatever reason, a grudge against. Ruby Ruse is both. Ruby Ruse just lowered her head silently. Paw raised his eyebrow at her. Then a tear ran down her cheek and then the dam smashed into pieces. She put her face to the desk and poured what must be litres of tears all over his desk. She lifted her head up. "Please, please, please, please, please! I...I beg of you, we *need* that money, how else are we going eat and live?! I don't have any skills! How am I going to get a half-decent job in wherever the tartarus these people will send me?! We're going to *starve* without that money!" Ruby composed herself for a moment, wiping away her tears. "Look, I can tell you despise me. And I can probably guess why. But please, Lucky Fortune will be killed too! He's just a *baby*." Rats. She just *had* to give him the baby's name. Broken Paw once again sighed. "Alright, six thousand five hundred. I'll drop my fee. That should be enough for you to...buy land or whatever. Like a farm or a business. Plus that money will feed you and your child for a few years or so at least, if you eat modestly." Ruby's emerald eyes instantly lit up like fireworks and she leaped across the table to tightly hug Paw while she blabbered incoherent expressions of gratitude. Paw slowly, but firmly, pushed her off him. "First of all this is for your child, not you. Put the money on the desk." Ruby complied while Broken Paw opened his desk drawers and slammed some documents and some kind of note on the desk. "You'll need these. The rest of your things you'll find on the address listed on the note. Read the instructions for the secret knock, otherwise you won't get inside." "Thank you, I know you're not doing this for me, but thank you all the same. Do you know where I'll be going?" She beamed a large grin at him. "No idea." He replied. "Wait, what?" "It's for the best, trust me. If I knew, and I was captured, which in my line of work is always a strong possibility, I could reveal your location and the locations of many others. Not to mention revealing the "crimes" of my associates. They say everyone, no matter how strong, eventually talks. And from long experience, I can assure you that's incredibly true." Ruby Ruse opens her mouth to say something but seems to think the better of it and shuts it. "You can leave now." She walks to the door but before she leaves mutters a final "Thank you" and "Goodbye". Paw follows her out to see Steel Jaw, the bartender and owner. As Ruby walks into the bar again, the patrons once again swivel their heads towards her and stare at her warily, making no noise. Ruby just ignores them and leaves quickly. As soon as she walks out the front entrance, the noise begins. In truth, the patrons don't actually know what goes on in the back or why so many strange people come through. They know the bar is a front for some subversive organization of some kind that almost certainly opposes the state, but beyond that, they have no clue what it actually DOES, how it's organized, who runs it or even who IS the pony in the backroom exactly? They almost certainly aren't aware he's a Unicorn, either. And to their credit, they never ask questions about him or what he does. In fact, they never even discuss him. They're smart enough to never talk about such things. These stallions are old. And all they care about is the tavern's cheap, yet strong cider, warm fireplace and the fact that it's one of the few places you can speak openly about the state, as everyone in the room is the same old people, coming here day in and day out. And every regular here hates Lady Rose Heart, Class A's and the state just as much as Broken Paw himself. Possibly more. So as long as no strangers are in, it's one of few places where these ageing ponies can speak their minds and rant about how screwed the current generation is. "Steel, sort this out for me." he hands Steel a list of orders for the ponies involved in the operation. In truth, Broken Paw's network is organized in a pyramid structure. At the very top is himself, at the second level of the pyramid is Steel Jaw, who relays his orders to his small band of agents. Those agents then use whatever spies and couriers they've employed to fulfil their orders from Steel Jaw. Orphans and the homeless are popular choices for spies and couriers, though servants and slaves work well too. Most in The Network probably assume Steel Jaw is the head of it all, but he's more of an underboss of sorts. Steel Jaw gives a grunt, which is Steel Jawian for "Sure", and continues washing a filthy rag with a mug for some reason.
  7. Weak Earthlings are only fit to be exterminated by the mighty Martian Empire! Though, we'll leave you alone in exchange for cookies.
  8. On behalf of all non-Northern USA people, I'm mildly annoyed at the idea that people north of Virginia and south of Canada don't have an accent. Accents are relative, ya know?!
  9. Princess Luna is overrated. That is all.

    1. Show previous comments  6 more
    2. HomicidalFrog

      HomicidalFrog

      Don't get any ideas, M.A Larson!

    3. 碇 シンジン
    4. Deae Rising Shine~

      Deae Rising Shine~

      XD but in serious now, I like all 4 princesses^^

  10. I suppose. But beyond that, we've barely seen anything of her character besides that she's dark, mysterious and socially aloof. ...Actually, considering Boba Fett's massive popularity, that might be the point.
  11. My dad's a soldier turned bricklayer and my mother used to be a nurse at an old folk's home for about two entire decades but she's currently unemployed.
  12. I honestly think Celestia is a far better princess than Luna and I don't get why everyone loves Luna so much. :okiedokielokie:
  13. Earwigs are honestly the most disgusting, vile, sinister creatures in the entire galaxy and they should be exterminated like the monstrous vermin that they are. Seriously, what is the purpose of their existence?!
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