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Princess Murphy, Meet Prince Brokenwriting! (Revised)


Dark Qiviut

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Author's Note: Credit goes to @@The Second Opinion, @@Buck Testa, @@~StatesTheOblivious~, @@Wind Chaser, and @ for this analysis. Parts of this analysis were revised to clean up some inaccuracies and add some insight from other reviews. My critique of Fancy Pants was revised as a result of feedback from both @@Nuke87654 and @@Sunny Fox.

Also, thanks, Walmart, for the entry image.


Since season three, episodes starring Spike are very notorious for being the ones many folks don't look forward to. As a fan of Spike, this notoriety's very well earned.

  1. Owl's Well That Ends Well: This is the episode that began the Spikabuse train. In a very clichéd story about jealousy, Spike is written as the antagonist despite having very reasonable fears of being replaced. The Mane Six appear completely ungrateful by being super-impressed with Owlowiscious despite never seeing him before, while giving Spike the same present last night after being around them for (maybe) a year. Twilight's reasons for keeping Owlowiscious makes no sense, for most of it's in the daytime, and Owlowiscious is up and driving Spike crazy. This is a classic torture porn.
  2. Dragon Quest: Season two's worst. Mean-spirited characterization of the Mane Six. Sexist implications by mocking Spike for wearing a "feminine" apron and presenting stereotypical male bullies. Xenophobic by stereotyping the entire dragon race as a bunch of thugs and writing a terrible moral implicating how ponies are better than dragons despite how his friends caused the whole conflict.
  3. Spike at Your Service: The start of Spike's flanderization and persistent out-of-characterization. The reliable, intelligent assistant is disregarded in favor of the incompetent, idiot servant. The Timberwolves are contrived. The Dragon Code is contrived (and had its original continuity disregarded by being taken seriously despite being a play card earlier). The climax is rushed and OOC of Applejack. Spike couldn't learn the lesson unless he was told directly. Spike's fear of being abandoned were completely ignored. Applejack's and Rarity's characterizations can't save this train wreck.
  4. Just for Sidekicks: Three words. Spike — torture — porn. An episode that made him act as if the morals he learned in Secret of My Excess and Dragon Quest never existed.
  5. Power Ponies: Not a complete disaster, but still really, really weak. The main problem was how Spike's role of comic relief was completely hammered in. They keep expositing how useless he is as Humdrum, while the other characters become useless with the obvious intent of making Spike the hero. Not all good satires have to be subtle, but the destination was too close to the viewer's face.
  6. Equestria Games: The biggest drawback was how The Hub and Hasbro tried to sell the Games, only to play against their expectations and make it merely filler. But even if the setting was different, Spike was still really stupid here, and the treatment the script gave him was painful.

Discovery Family/Hasbro has always put in some effort to publish at least one teaser to excite the audience. The day before Appleoosa's Most Wanted aired, a teaser was published, and there was reason for hope: It was the episode's best scene. So when Princess Spike's synopsis appeared, plenty of people like myself were apprehensive toward it for the reasons outlined above. When there was no teaser for it, fears conjure up even more.

After watching it, I can see why. Princess Spike is a mess.

Now, to get it out of the way, contrivances aren't inherently bad. The point of a contrivance is to serve and advance the plot. If you're going to be a writer, you must add them. The catch is to hide it. Every episode has at least one, but some are more naturally hidden than others. The issue is when the contrivance becomes transparent, hence "contrived." Rainbow Falls and Trade Ya! are two examples of very contrived episodes.

Currently, Princess Spike is season five's most contrived episode. How?

We'll start with the exposition in both the prologue and Act 1.

I made this point in so many other reviews/analyses, including Rainbow Rocks, but for those who haven't read them, I'll repeat it. When you have so much exposition very early, you suck the tension out and make the journey feel boring. Exposition shouldn't have to be relied on to progress the plot.

In Flight to the Finish, Mrs. Harshwhinny told the fillies the rules of the contest. But you see chalkboard illustrations as she speaks. Their exposition sets up the plot, but it's ancillary and enhances the conflict.

The Cutie Map starts out with some exposition when Rainbow Dash summarizes why Twilight has The Castle of Friendship. Quick, done, moving on. Like Flight, Pinkie tells us and her friends about the townsfolk's creepy smiles, but we get to see it, and the exposition enhances the conflict.

In other words, good exposition shouldn't feel out of place or dependent. Princess Spike depends on telling the audience elements of the plot. At the minimum, good exposition should be the chocolate syrup on the sundae, not the ceramic plate for the sundae.

One obvious contrivance occurs right in the beginning when Twilight is so sleepy, she can't stay awake. What happened was completely adorkable; it doesn't make as much sense sleeping on the floor as opposed to a pile of books. But what really gives it away is twofold:

  1. By having her prepare for it offscreen, Cadance has to be the vessel to move the plot forward. Because the title appears on the screen during this part, the journey to Spike's conflict suddenly becomes realized: Twilight is asleep, and he must make sure she isn't disturbed.
  2. In the same sequence:
    Quote

    Princess Cadance: Can I count on you to see to it that she isn't disturbed?
    The minute he promised to Cadance, you know something is about to go awry, either with him or with Twilight. For long-time bronies, Spike's line spells trouble because almost all of his episodes involve him screwing up, making himself look like a fool, antagonist, or combination of other factors. One of which is being out of character.

Why this is so transparent is how the conflict commences by mostly telling the audience. Do we see her exhausted? Yes. But do we see her get to that point? No. If Princess Spike showed us how hard she worked, then the conflict adds some impact. Witnessing the effect is one thing. Witnessing the cause is another.

In addition to telling the cause of the conflict, three others were introduced: the polo game, the dragon sneeze trees, and the broken water pipe.

  1. Originally, the game felt natural in the story. But once the dragon sneeze trees appeared, it became extremely transparent. How it was going to be involved was unknown, but FIM doesn't leave plot devices hanging often. Later, the field was greatly decreased, making playing the game much more difficult, so the size was going to impact the story.
  2. The dragon sneeze trees have every single reason to be knocked down. Not only were they a health hazard to dragons. But the trunks have difficulty supporting the leaves' weight, hence the swaying animation. If one tree falls down and lands on somepony, then the royalty faces a major lawsuit.
     

    Well…I hope.
  3. There are many factors behind water main breaks, including very cold temperatures in the winter and their ages being older than most of my family tree. But one thing I know is if the pipe is in imminent danger of breaking, you must take care of it. A broken water pipe is a hazard whether it's a cartoon or not.

Alone, the contrivances were very obvious. When combined, they expose a really confused tone. When he initially tried to keep Canterlot quiet so she can sleep, the entire setup for his role behaves less as a serious matter and more as a joke. He wants her to sleep peacefully, but silly cartoon logic gets in the way. But rather than playing the matter seriously, the script tells the viewer how they're not as dangerous in-verse as we think they are. Nick Dusedau, Thiessen, and Big Jim Miller present the script and story with key hazards, both to ponies and dragons. But how can the audience treat it seriously when the tone's presentation is silly? There's a way to make the audience laugh and simultaneously acknowledge its serious moments, like The Cutie Map. But it's trying to tell both, yet can't figure out what to tell and how to balance them.

I'll return to the confusion later.

@The Second Opinion points out a moment in the prologue where Spike's role in canon and to the audience starts to unravel:

Quote

Spike: Um, hello, everypony! I'm here to help any way I can. So if there's anything I can do for any of you—
Delegate 1: We love you, Princess Twilight!
Delegate 2: We love all the princesses!

Notice the contrast. Spike tells everyone in the hall how he wants to help anyone, but everyone ignores him. This tells the audience the plot's angle, but the approach is subtle like knuckles clanging steel.

There, another major contrivance is presented: Canterlot's citizens behaving like a hivemind towards the princesses, especially Twilight. I have no idea where this inspiration came from, but part of me believes it comes from Canterlot's past complacency to other high-end ponies, first seen in Sweet & Elite. The big difference between here and Sweet is how Rarity's and Fancy Pants's high-quality taste and conviction help sway Canterlot's elite. But Fancy Pants doesn't blindly follow everything; his maturity is capable of seeing variations of good even if it's simple like Rarity's underdeveloped dress for Twilight. But in Princess Spike, Canterlot's citizens are presented as a bunch of out-of-character idiots.

Why is Canterlot out of character?

  1. Both the arborist and construction worker have very valid reasons for their work. It doesn't matter if Spike told them to stop in Twilight's name. If they were really as smart as they should've been, then they would've ignored Spike and continued working to keep Canterlot safe.
  2. The New York stallion and Whinnyapolis mares (the latter a Fargo reference with a stereotypical Minnesotan accent) went to Princess Twilight to sort out speeches about their local economies. But when "Twilight" "sorted out" the problem, this happened:
     
    Quote

    Manehattan Delegate: If that's what the princess wants, what are ya gonna do?
     
    Whinnyapolis Delegate: The princess is always right!

     


     
    Okay, what the hell is this?!
     
    Seriously, just because Twilight is a princess doesn't mean she's right about everything. Princesses make mistakes just like any common pony or being. Luna can make mistakes. Celestia can make mistakes. Cadance can make mistakes. Twilight has made mistakes. Princesses won't always make the right decisions. So what if any of their decision is royally stupid? Should the ponies act like drones and suck up to them, or would it make much better sense to think for themselves?
     
    Apparently the latter, because it gets worse.
  3. Later in Act 2, one of the stallions wanted to see Twilight because of a friendship problem. The problem?
     
    Quote

    Fluffy Clouds: I was really looking forward to the "Don't Spend All Your Bits" Speech, but when I went into the hall, [tearing up] a pony had taken my seat. A pony who used to be my friend!
     

     

     

     

     
    I'll be blunt. The fact that a stallion actually wondered if he should preserve his friendship with someone over a seat competes with Rainbow Dash wheeling herself to Rainbow Falls as the second-dumbest piece of writing I've ever seen in this show. Any sensible being isn't this pitiful. If your friendship is going to be broken up over someone taking over your seat, then maybe that friend really isn't your friend. (More is added later.)
     
    Canterlot's poor characterization is condensed to this exchange in two things. Firstly, when Spike called him out for this, Fluffy Clouds told Spike he only wanted to hear Twilight, not "some random dragon's opinion." FC's xenophobia calls back how Dragon Quest's narrative stereotypes dragons as bullies, thugs, and dummies and him being ignored in the prologue in favor of the princesses. A dragon's or common pony's opinion can be just as valuable as a princess's, if not more. You just need to pay attention to him or her and critically think whether his or her advice makes sense. Don't take advice at face value. Think. Secondly, as Fluffy Clouds whines, several background ponies are in earshot and equally involved in the same dilemma. Why didn't anyone else call out Fluffy Clouds and tell him to not to waste her time over trivial matters?
     
    Oh, wait, if that happened, then we have no plot!
  4. You had a whole queue asking "Twilight" for advice. She's not the only royalty in Canterlot. Cadance, Luna, and Celestia also exist, and they are all a part of the summit. Rather than wasting time in line and bothering Twilight, why not take time to ask any of them?
     
    And another thing. Why the hell did Celly and Luna disappear following the prologue? It's as if either the script pretended they don't exist or the Royal Sisters don't matter. Either way, they're there preparing for the summit while Twilight's asleep. Celestia is just as revered and has lived for over a millennium, and Luna isn't far off. So won't it make just as much sense to talk with either of them instead? I'll get back to Cadance later.
     
    On top of that, Fancy Pants's characterization is also called into question. In Sweet & Elite, Fancy Pants was, well, an elite, but he wasn't afraid to dissent against the rest of Canterlot's high-end suck-ups. When Twilight's dressed was mocked, he complimented it. During the middle of Act 2, he wasn't any better than the rest of the background idiots, for he groveled over Twilight equally and asked to have access to every meeting and party in the Grand Equestria Royal Summit. Although he was fine with the rejection, he's still much more humble than that.
     
    As far as his anger in Act 3 is concerned, there's validity. When a royalty tells someone to stop working on a hazard, implications are sent to him that she cares about nopony but herself. Fancy Pants worked hard keeping an eye on the hazards to protect everyone. Because he doesn't know that she was sleeping, he has every reason to feel suspicious. On the other hand, he shouldn't squarely blame Twilight. Even though he called out the public workers, he never held them accountable when he should've. Only "Twilight" told them to stop, but they never got complete approval from any of the other princesses. So while it was great of him to forgive Spike, and he was okay at best, his overall characterization feels hollow.

To put it short, the ponies in Canterlot's summit are a bunch of numbskulls.

I'm a big Spike fan. I love to see this kid succeed in stories that starred him beyond fanfiction and fancomics. Unfortunately, sans Power Ponies and Just for Sidekicks, whenever a Spike episode is bad, they're really bad. Owl's Well That Ends Well, Dragon Quest, Spike at Your Service, and Equestria Games are all among the bottom twenty. Two** are in the bottom-ten. Despite liking Spike, I outright despise the majority of Spike-centric episodes due to their objectively low quality.

 

**I had Equestria Games as the tenth-worst episode (making it three), but even though it's still horrid, in reality, there's not enough to really put it that low on the list.

Spike's treatment is this episode's most outward flaw.

The really confused tone in the beginning — which I mentioned above — sets up the quality of the story. Just like the background characters treat the hazards seriously, Spike himself treats the whole situation seriously. He's very proud of being her assistant and doesn't want to let anyone down. Each time there's noise, Spike starts to panic, and he doesn't want to let Princess Cadance down. Listen to his frantic vocality and watch him flail his arms as the bird sings on top of Twilight's horn.

Then immediately after, Canterlot suddenly becomes very bustling. Like the bird, his motives are very sincere. Without sleep, she can't function for the ceremony that night. Spike may be a child, but he wants to really do a great job.

But where the episode starts to hurt is when real-life hazards are introduced. Even though he's naïve, he's not dumb. He's not incompetent. To make a mistake is one thing. To really lack proper judgment and tell the arborist and construction worker not to clear the dangers is another. If the two background ponies were as competent as they supposedly are, they'll tell him something like this:

Quote

Young dragon, safety comes first. If Twilight really told me to not cut down the trees/fix the water pipe so she can get some shuteye, then maybe she's not so fitting to become a princess, after all.

As biting as this is, this is a much more satisfying direction for the plot. Why? Because Spike is so desperate to not wake her up, he's overlooking much more important social and environmental issues. Normally, you don't see anyone criticize a princess canonically. Equestrian royalty is highly trusted. A citizen calling out a princess with very valid reasons wakes him up from his desperation and (minutely) snaps the canon out of treating Canterlot's princesses as deities. By the virtue of criticizing Twilight, Spike is hit personally because they're supposedly very close. Spike is supposed to look out for her best interest, but he's overlooking everyone else's, his own based on the trees, and the summit.

But despite very dangerous problems in Canterlot, the ponies blindly support Twilight and stop working out of plot convenience. Is the situation treated respectfully? No. Rather, their incompetence is designed to make people laugh.

This is where the real trouble begins. Spike is treated as a punching bag right from the start. When Cadance accidentally smashed Spike in between the door and the wall, the audience is given a clue about how the writer and editor (in this case, M. A. Larson) thought about Spike here. Immediately, Spike was a victim of really terrible slapstick, and the audience is supposed to laugh. But whether the viewer has watched the show for a long time or it's his, her, or hir first, the joke fails. Why?

Notice the sequence.

 


640px-Cadance_slams_the_door_on_Spike%27s_face_S5E10.png

 

640px-Spike_frozen_in_the_air_S5E10.png

 

640px-Pile_of_books_falls_on_top_of_Spike_S5E10.png

 

640px-Spike_stuck_under_the_book_pile_S5E10.png

Not one minute into the first act, the scene is enough to make people cringe. The accident put a child in a lot of pain. Yes, it's short-lived, but that doesn't validate the treatment. He's just trying to open the door, but it resulted in him getting smashed.

Is it a joke?

Yes.

Is it a good one?

Hell, no! It's mean-spirited!

Unfortunately, the jokes remain relentless until the commercial break. Every sequence (of sound) — the bird tweeting, Canterlot's collective noise, the trees/Spike's nasty allergies, the ponies' ineptitude — are all jokes. But like I wrote in my impressions, every joke here is terrible because Spike doesn't deserve it. The poor dragon isn't being sleazy, greedy, or abusive. He's trying to do his job. If any of the chaos wakes her up, how do you think he'll feel? I have two guesses:

  1. Disappointed for breaking his promise to Cadance.
  2. Disgraced for failing to let Twilight sleep.

But after Act 1 finished, the episode started to shift in tone and characterization.

While the episode plays off to be comedic, it tries to be serious also. Pop culture references sprout in these scenes in order to make the audience laugh, but the conflicts are also played straight. Like I said before, Spike legitimately worries about what he needs to do to not only keep Twilight asleep, but also prove he can do a really good job. You can understand his internal conflict: He doesn't know what to do. From a storytelling perspective, Dusedau is juggling to balance them both. But instead of treating the conflict respectfully, their stereotypical voices and petty arguing injure the mood of the tone.

The mood is damaged more when Fluffy Clouds whines about his friendship with some other dude ending over a seating conflict. For me, I'm not sure if this scene is supposed to be either a joke or serious. Part of me believes this is supposed to be funny because the conflict is so trivial. But Fluffy Clouds treats this matter seriously, and two delegates were also serious. If this is all supposed to be a "joke," I'm not laughing. If this is supposed to be serious, then it doesn't risk overtaking the beginning of Rainbow Falls, Act 3, as the second-dumbest moment. It competes with EQG1's interrogation scene as FIM's dumbest altogether.

There are several big problems with his bout of greed.

  1. He already understands the consequences. In Secret of My Excess, he learns how a dragon's innate greed causes them to grow at the expense of their genuine personalities. If he doesn't control it, then he risks hurting someone. When he realized the damage he caused, he felt incredibly guilty. Dragon Quest's intended moral is to not succumb to peer pressure and grow into your own conscience.
     
    Since Spike at Your Service, his characterization resets. If you watched Just for Sidekicks, you watched Secret, because the internal conflict and moral are very similar. But it also pretended how his past growth didn't exist. Power Ponies and Equestria Games retreads his desire to prove his worth from Owl's Well without the envy.
     
    Princess Spike marks the third time he learned about how his lust hurts others. Sure, there's the flat disguise of not to be selfish and take advantage of Twilight's position of power, but that's on the surface. Just's and Princess Spike's are very similar. First, he lets his greed willingly corrupt. Secondly, he realizes how greed hurts others when confronted about it. Then he understands how not to allow his selfishness and greed control himself and take advantage of others. In short, Princess Spike rips off a ripoff and makes him out of character.
  2. Until the fourteenth minute in, his corrupt side had nothing to do with the story. Spike used his connection with Twilight to try to restore order. Each time he ordered for Twilight, he intended to help unload some of her schedule. To him, if he succeeded, then she won't have to chase for her bed and sleep through the summit.
     
    Unfortunately, he made some extremely stupid decisions, thus enforcing his flanderization dating back to Spike at Your Service. The polo ponies need a lot of room to play their game, or else they'll get tangled and can misfire. Each dragon sneeze tree must be chopped down and the broken water pipe must be fixed for safety reasons. The little dragon is a "baby," but he's also very intelligent. When Twilight was getting out of control in Lesson Zero, he wrote to the princess to have her intervene. When the teenage dragons ordered him to smash the phoenix egg, Spike stood his ground. When Inspiration Manifestation continued to corrupt Rarity, he tried to steal it and later ate it. In other words, this kid understands danger. He's competent. He's not stupid. He'll try to do the right thing even if his friends don't confront him.
     
    If Spike was his in-character and competent self like in Inspiration Manifestation, Lesson Zero, EQG1, and Dragon Quest, he would've allowed the arborist and construction worker to continue working, and he'll fix the sound problem some other way. The tower's window is open, and her room isn't sound-proof. If he was truly responsible, he would've attempted to lock the window and go to maybe Celestia to conjure up a sound-proof spell for Twilight.
     
    So what caused the drama in the climax? Resolutions he came up with very early in the episode. When Spike moved the polo teams, the field shrunk. This lead to a crowded and reckless game. The punted ball toppled the dragon sneeze trees like dominoes. After a tree landed on the broken pipe, it burst, causing a major flood on the streets and inside the hall. Dragon sneeze plants floated into the hall, which erupted Spike's allergies and caused him to sneeze the statue to smithereens. Led by Fancy Pants, a mob of delegates infiltrated Twilight's tower. None of his greed or abuse of power came into play at that point. Each time "Twilight" decided, his logic behind why was semi-believable.
     
    So what happened when he acted like an antagonist? A pony messaged his back. Chef Gustave le Grand baked him some jewel cupcakes begrudgingly. A background pony painted a portrait of a sexy adult Spike, calling back from A Dog and Pony Show. And an endless bucket of jewels to gorge. That's it. Did anything here relate to the overall conflict? No. Divide the halves, you get two severely disjointed stories.
     
    Aside from the moral, what did his antagonism mean to Princess Spike? Nothing.
  3. Spike receives all of the blame for the drama, and the source is his abuse for power. But like what I wrote before, the drama is the consequence of good intentions. By blaming him for trying to do the right thing, you tell the audience no matter how much he tries, he's going to remain stuck in mediocrity. If he tries to do the right thing, then you let Canterlot down. If you don't, then you let Cadance and Twilight down. From the get-go, Spike is caught between in between two precarious predicaments with no ability to balance them. Cadance's enforcement of his promise doesn't create compromise.
     
    In fact, Cadance is a source of the problem. Spike has never been in such a position before on screen. To us, this is foreign for him. So, why didn't Cadance tell him to come to her if he has trouble solving any political problems? She rules the Crystal Empire, so the audience will assume she knows something about diplomating. But by ignoring his bold-faced lies and letting him abuse his power, she shares some of the blame for the drama. But the script doesn't call her on it nor put her responsible for some of the trouble, leaving Spike as a scapegoat.
     
    (BTW, she made one two really stupid decisions during the climax. Firstly, she left a child alone to drain the massive flood. Secondly, blocking an active water pipe is extremely dangerous; prior, someone should've turned it off.)
     
    But there's another source of the problem: Twilight for organizing the convention and spending three sleepless days just to get it ready on time. Unfortunately, her struggle to stay awake resulted in conferences and events conflicting with one another. If Spike doesn't get involved and clean it up, then the summit would've been a worse public relations disaster than Unicon. In short, she earns a bit of the blame. On the other hand, con preparation is very hard work, and the visuals dictate how much effort she put into it to make it special, so I can't dominantly fault her for the conflict. She earns some shuteye.
  4. Although the moral itself is really good, the approach is broken.

    a. It's complete filler. He learned two other variations prior. If I want to watch an episode with a very similar moral, I'll watch SoME, not a double retread.
     
    b. It reinforces the clichéd formula seen in past Spike episodes. With the exception of one, every Spike episode has him screwing up badly at some point. As a result, you're going to make the audience wonder what he'll do to badly screw up. This formula has been used in almost every Spike episode. As a result, you'll merely tire long-time bronies. Inspiration Manifestation has him making a big mistake, but his alibi makes sense: Rarity had a complete meltdown in front of him after a client bashed her stage for focusing on the visuals rather than the utility, so he didn't want to see the same problem repeat.
     
    To make it worse, many Spike episodes — Owl's Well, Dragon Quest, and Service — reuse clichéd storylines without changing anything beyond the surface. @Buck Testa describes how Princess Spike closely follows the "dumb guy" cliché seen in several 1990s/2000s sitcoms:
     
    "The dumb guy makes a really stupid decision that will get him in trouble if found out, so he tries to hide it. By covering it up, he worsens the problem. Finally, he's confronted personally, and he spews a moral he never learned."
     
    Spike is the dumb guy here, and a dumb and incompetent Spike is an out-of-character Spike! By hammering it in, he's a flanderized Spike, too.
     
    c. Spike is the only one held responsible. Again, what caused the problem were his three terrible decisions very early in the first act, even though his irrationality has some believability. But like what @~StatesTheOblivious~ said in his review, none of Spike's actions are written to be in the wrong until late in Act 2. They were encouraging, and it looked like he was trying to do the right thing. In other words, his actions helped save the con.
     
    However, a coincidence and careless oversight resulted in him being the bad guy for everything, including reorganizing the con. Canonically, he apologized for abusing his power, yet he really apologized for saving royalty's backside. This implication hurts kids because Spike is blamed for everything here even though all four alicorns ought to share the majority of it for failing to properly organize the event and keep Canterlot safe. Celestia and Luna really deserve a lot of scorn for apparently being AWOL much of the day.
     
    (Also, why didn't Cadance call Spike out in Act 2 for not addressing the safety hazards when the construction worker's complacency's happening right in front of her?)
     
    d. It's a non sequitur. Even with the climax bridging the two halves, the moral is off-topic and disconnected.

But despite all the problems, the approach to giving Spike his recognition was really sweet. When he tried to rebuild the statue and failed, all of the delegates united with him. Cadance said it best: No matter how much you play your part, you're as important as everypony else. During the last part of her speech, she looked at Spike sincerely, implying to both him and the audience how important he is to everyone. Even with all the torture porn in this episode, at least he has his moment at the end…

 


640px-Spike_%22aw%2C_come_on!%22_S5E10.png

 

640px-Spike_about_to_destroy_the_statue_again_S5E10.png

…But this tasteless joke fucking ruins it!

  1. The imagery is disgusting. It was already painful to see Spike's eyes swell from allergies the first and second time around. The poor dragon suffered enough. Why overwhelm him — and the audience, by extension — by reviving it once the moral is resolved? Damn it, the later the scene, the more the grosser details hurt.
  2. DHX confirms to the audience how much of a punchline Spike is. Even though the audience can assume he's a constant joke, the resolution gave the audience faint hope that Spike is more than a one-dimensional piñata. That he's as equal a character as the Cutie Mark Crusaders. Instead, the only main male character is relegated to a sideshow who does nothing but get himself into situations where he'll badly screw up.
     
    What worsens this implication is how FIM is supposed to be a pro-feminist show. A show with proud, unique qualities that can attract all sorts of demographics. A show that teaches us new techniques of masculinity and femininity without being tied down to sex. The morals are supposed to reach out to people young and old. When the morals are really mature, kids are respected. One of its most important morals is to be yourself. By endlessly punishing Spike and making him suffer long after he learns his lesson, kids are being told how meaningless the show's morals are. Even after you learn your lesson, karma will still bite you back. Spike is a really unique character, as he's the only dragon and male/boy of the main cast, so there's ample opportunity to bring a fresh perspective of Equestrian society. With this scene, DHX tells longtime and first-time watchers that being different means the show can make a complete ass out of you, and you will like it.

My question to you is this: What does this teach children? What does this teach parents of children? For me, being ordinary is the way to live. Sticking out from the crowd and being yourself makes you inaccessible. Having a fresh voice in life invalidates your existence. Say I'm a father of a young kid and want to find a good cartoon show for him/her and me to watch together. If this was my first episode of Friendship Is Magic, I would feel horrified, never let my kid watch the show again, and not recommend it to other people in my inner circle.

In addition, what does this teach in the name of feminism? Remember, feminism is bringing all genders at an equal level. This scene asks the viewer where Friendship Is Magic stands for as a feminist icon. For me, this scene confirmed a major hit in its credibility. How? Because it implies a return to the status quo for Spike in a rather daring product. As the rest of his friends mature, he's stuck and will have his character reset for the next episode, maybe in another clichéd episode with another clichéd setup with the possibility of characters as stereotypical as the bullies from Dragon Quest, Snips and Snails from Boast Busters, or Tree Hugger from Make Friends But Keep Discord. For he's different in both species and gender, this scene doesn't furnish feminism, but anti-feminism instead. To echo @Wind Chaser and merge his thoughts with mine, the scene and aforementioned episode epitomize hypocrisy in a show that champions individuality and challenges the status quo, two main goals of third-wave feminism. Season five has dared to move in a fresh direction with their characters, plots, and morals. Despite being imperfect, it earns credit for advancing in this path. To suggest a return to the status quo for the only main male character and not even attempt to hide it calls the ethics of FIM's canon and production into question.

Ironically, a clip from Slice of Life had Vinyl's bass cannon literally jump over a shark plushie. Because of how flanderized and out of character he is, how much Spike is abused in the episode's canon, Princess Spike's terrible writing quality overall, and how much DHX panders themselves to this complacent pattern, Spike episodes have officially jumped the shark to me. I held out hope that we could have more and more really good Spike episodes. Instead, DHX acts like they don't have a clue how to approach him. Whenever he stars an episode, they tend to pick really unimaginative stories, attach terrible implications, or torture him for the sake of a lazy joke. For a while, this pattern annoyed me. But it hasn't improved. In fact, I argue it's getting worse, for Spike is slowly being reduced into one flat note. Now this pattern disturbs me. As a feminist, Spike's treatment in this show goes against my own morale. Echoing , these episodes are self-fulfilling prophecies. His roles as a secondary character have been rather decent. This season, he was the victim of some slapstick in Castle Sweet Castle, but it was situational, very brief, and it didn't reappear. He meant well, fulfilled his job, and got rewarded. Currently, I have no hope for Spike episodes in the future.

As for the writing quality of this episode…well, without a doubt, it's season five's worst by a long shot. Appleoosa's Most Wanted is awful, but Troubleshoes is a very endearing, lovable, and relatable character who caught a break. Spike never caught a break here. If you were to tell me which are the worst written episodes of the show (without putting any emphasis in any category) prior to PrS, the bottom-five list would be like this:

  1. Rainbow Falls
  2. Boast Busters
  3. The Mysterious Mare Do Well
  4. One Bad Apple
  5. The Show Stoppers

Now it's like this:

  1. Rainbow Falls
  2. Princess Spike
  3. Boast Busters
  4. The Mysterious Mare Do Well
  5. One Bad Apple

Princess Spike's writing quality is worse than Boast Busters! Where it's placed in my bottom-ten episode list overall remains to be seen.

Because Princess Spike's so bad, I'm now beginning to look forward for EQG: The Friendship Games in some capacity despite really hating the whole spinoff. Even though the past two films suck, Spike was the best written character, and EQG1 gave him his best role and characterization of the entire generation (including this hilarious line). Hopefully, he'll be written with some dignity in the third film, too.

  • Brohoof 10

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I've lost my hope on spike episodes  Princess Spike was the first episode ever to upset me it wasnt happy episode not happy at all. 

  • Brohoof 5
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The writing in this episode is sloppier than a sloppy joe. It goes against everything that the show stands for as a feminist show and treated everyone like a goddamn idiot, making the Commander Cobra from the 80s G.I. Joe cartoon look more competent by comparison.

 

It just shocks me that the construction worker didn't went through with repairing of the broken pipe because Spike told him that Twi needed sleep. I bet you if some giant monster came in attacking Canterlot and some random dude told him "Wait! Princess Twilight wants you to stand there for some poor reason," he'll do so without even questioning the chances of his survival. I'd rather watch a WCW show booked by Vince Russo.

  • Brohoof 6
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DQ, may I post a counter to some of your points please? It would take some time of course to write a case but I'd like to rebuttal some of your points.

  • Brohoof 1
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While I have to disagree with some of your points simply because I think you're sometimes asking too much from writing (or human behavior, reactions and thought patterns in general), I share your despise for this episode; you summed up everything to dislike about it and presented it in a very structured and detailed way.

 

For me, as I wrote in my little review, the missing connection between lesson and cause of trouble, between the problem and it's presented "cause" were the most messed up things in this episode.

 

Note: By now I even get the feeling that the staff sorts out the most acceptable episode ideas, gets 20 to 23 each season, fills the missing spots with obviously bad ones and writes at least one of them as a Spike episode because it's an "easy" way out.

  • Brohoof 3
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It just shocks me that the construction worker didn't went through with repairing of the broken pipe because Spike told him that Twi needed sleep. I bet you if some giant monster came in attacking Canterlot and some random dude told him "Wait! Princess Twilight wants you to stand there for some poor reason," he'll do so without even questioning the chances of his survival. I'd rather watch a WCW show booked by Vince Russo.

You make a really good point here. Even with all of the dumb writing in this episode, the scene that really breaks suspension of disbelief throughout is to not clean up the hazards, like the broken pipe. Any competent worker wouldn't stop just to kiss up to Twilight. They'd keep going. Too many people IRL work hours upon hours to fix the watering systems; this scene is insulting to them.

 

Like I wrote earlier, the only way for it to really work is if Spike pleads them to stop so she can sleep, only for him to stand his ground and criticize "Twilight" for her selfishness and ineptitude.

  • Brohoof 3
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As the rest of his friends mature, he's stuck and will have his character reset for the next episode, maybe in another clichéd episode with another clichéd setup with the possibility of characters as stereotypical as the bullies from Dragon Quest, Snips and Snails from Boast Busters, or Tree Hugger from Make Friends But Keep Discord.

 

Yeah, this is probably the worst thing about the whole thing. Spike never really learns from his mistakes, and thus he manages to make the very same ones in future episodes. 

 

As a matter of fact, this very episode proves that he pretty much learned nothing from Just for Sidekicks, even despite the fact that he admitted his guilt (even though was not ever called out for it). 

 

It's pretty damn frustrating. :okiedokielokie:

  • Brohoof 2
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Owl's Well That Ends Well - This was mentioned in a skype chat before I saw this blog. 

 

 
[3:36:52 PM] Jeric: Worst episodes to me are the few that bore me, not the episodes that have inconsistent writing
[3:37:49 PM | Edited 3:38:12 PM] Jeric: Owl's Well That Ends Well has the notable distinction as the only episode in the series I never finished
[3:39:01 PM] Jeric: I skipped it 10 mins in during my marathon

 

[3:40:50 PM] Jeric: A boring episode is the unforgivable sin.
 
I want on to say that two of Spike's Episodes had me actively wanting the episode to end. This is the worst think I can ever say about an entertainment property. This isn't to say I hate the character. He has plenty of moments I enjoy when the story doesn't place him in a prominent role. But man ... 
  • Brohoof 3
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Owl's Well That Ends Well - This was mentioned in a skype chat before I saw this blog. 

 

 
[3:36:52 PM] Jeric: Worst episodes to me are the few that bore me, not the episodes that have inconsistent writing
[3:37:49 PM | Edited 3:38:12 PM] Jeric: Owl's Well That Ends Well has the notable distinction as the only episode in the series I never finished
[3:39:01 PM] Jeric: I skipped it 10 mins in during my marathon

 

[3:40:50 PM] Jeric: A boring episode is the unforgivable sin.
 
I want on to say that two of Spike's Episodes had me actively wanting the episode to end. This is the worst think I can ever say about an entertainment property. This isn't to say I hate the character. He has plenty of moments I enjoy when the story doesn't place him in a prominent role. But man ... 

 

  • Which is the other Spike episode?
  • I rather watch an episode and be bored than watch an episode and be pissed. At least if it's boring, I can sleep through, whereas I'll need to pause it to grab some Advil if an episode's content angers me.
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Spike at Your Service ... though that one drove me crazy more than bored me. Even more when I realized later that it was salvaged from a bad script to begin with. Proof positive that revisions should never be surface level changes.

  • Brohoof 2
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Now I'll agree with many stuff on here, mainly on the tonal issues this episode presented. These points I'll present are ones I believe on the other hand differently.

 

1. Alright, first point I want to contest is your point on Fancy Pants. You assert that Fancy Pants is ooc because he reacted hastily and harshly to how things have happened at the Equestrian Summit among other things.

 

Here's one issue I'm arguing against, why is Fancy Pants asking Princess Twilight to see if she'll grant him VIP passes for himself and whomever he chooses a bad thing? Especially considering how he reacted to Spike's refusal in Twilight's name with an appeased attitude despite not getting what he wanted and that Twilight is the one heading the summit and was the one he scheduled to meet with to discuss on getting those passes. 

 

His anger is also more understandable in the form of these points:

 

A. It was he who ordered the the trees to be trimmed but yet finds that not only they weren't but the reason why his order was disobeyed was according to the tree cutter Twilight's orders them not to have them cut down. This is further built upon with a possible implication that he may have ordered the water pipe to be fixed only for it to be disobeyed in favor of Twilight's orders as well. 

 

B. Fancy Pants: "I'll not let Princess Twilight give Canterlot a bad name in the eyes of Equestria! Come on, everypony! Let's go give her a piece of our minds!"

 

Here, we're presented his motivation and reason to be angry, his home city's name is degraded by Twilight's poor decisions in front of a summit where representatives from across Equestria are seeing right before their eyes. How do you think those representatives are going to look at Canterlot that had a water pipe burst, trees falling down, and their meeting hall drenched in water from the water pipe on the day of the meeting? Not very highly I'm afraid. To make matters more personal for him, because his orders were disobeyed to have them fixed only for Twilight to say nope don't fix them, how do you think anyone's going to react knowing that not only were their orders superseded by someone but that person's decisions led to a disaster for everyone involved? Understandably peeved. That's not including whatever is going on behind the scenes with the upper class in Equestria that again are not going to look Canterlot favorably after what had happened and thus he's likely going to suffer a hit to his reputation and especially the city he represents unfairly.

 

C. He finds that there were many ponies who were also not pleased with Twilight's decisions as well who are just as ticked at their own results and how the meeting turned out. Thus of course he'll be leading an angry mob of ponies who share their disappointment in Twilight's decision making that has caused many bad outcomes on that day, even if he didn't called for it, I'm sure many would follow him to the tower regardless.

 

 

2. On another matter, your criticism on the ponies meeting solely with Twilight instead of the other princesses suffers a couple of issues in my opinion in the form of:

 

A. We have no proof other than Cadance later in the day of the Princesses being available. For all we know, Luna and Celestia are probably working their butts off handling another group of ponies or other things to keep the delegation and day well at Canterlot and Equestria. To assume that Luna and Celestia should be at fault because they're not there in the episode after the prologue is to me unfair for them. None of them received any advance warning that their meeting is called off so why should they change their schedule to meet with someone else instead?

 

Cadance has a bigger fault for it because she actually was the one who not only tells her sister in law to sleep for the day, but rather than tell Spike what he should do should any of Twilight's delegations come or even tell the meetings to be postponed at a later time she doesn't do any of that, and to a lesser degree, Twilight because she should've planned better than to spend three whole days without sleep dealing with the meeting. 

 

 

B. Why should they not expect their princesses to give them answers they seek in their meeting? Not only is it shown to be a responsibility for the princesses to do but it is something they've come to expect with good results after how long Celestia has been in charge handling those delegates and how Twilight has handled with various situations in Ponyville and Equestria as well.

 

 

3. About the issue with the two worker ponies who were busy working with important assignments, they were explicitly ordered from Spike representing Twilight who had wanted to keep things quiet for Twilight under Cadance's orders to stop their work. You can critique about how they should've thought with initiative like Spike did when put on his own, but considering how they were ordered by Twilight to not to do their work for at least a few hours. A thing is that when you're ordered by your leader to not do this at their request, you probably have to obey or so lest you face discipline for disobeying orders most likely even if you believe it is the most idiotic order imagined.

 

4. I believe he did closed the windows considering we see Spike through a closed window looking to see the polo (one thing I know I'll need to edit in my review) playing ponies that were actually shown disturbing Twilight's Sleep as she was moving annoyed by the noise. Thus he had every right to act on that situation. As for asking Celestia for a sound proof barrier, that's assuming such a thing exists, she actually knows doing such a spell, and she wasn't busy elsewhere that he can reach her.

 

Other than that, many of your thoughts in your excellent review I agree with on many points. This is merely something that I wanted to add below this comment section with what I consider wrong in the review. It is my personal opinion of course.

  • Brohoof 2
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I agree with almost everything you point out here, DQ. However, like Nukey, I don't think Fancy Pants was really badly portrayed. Why wouldn't he think Twilight was responsible for the disaster? As far as he knew, Spike's decisions were Twilight's decisions. Otherwise, I applaud your analysis.

  • Brohoof 2
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