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Jokes stolen on the internet - Day 15

I was about to propose to my girlfriend when my roommate Joseph barged into the room out of nowhere, tripped, and fell over, breaking a glass table with his face. Totally ruined the mood. Now I don't know Joseph THAT well, don't even remember where he was from, but let's say I put my plans on hold to help him through his injuries. Joseph had gotten a big glass shard in his eye, making him completely blind in that eye. He was walking around with one of those big cotton pads on his eye for a couple of months. Then suddenly, he disappeared, along with my girlfriend. Apparently they'd bonded during the time after his injuries, and eloped together, leaving me behind without as much as a note. I tried to track them down, but never could. In conclusion, if it hadn't been for Joe with his cotton eye, I'd have been married a long time ago. Where did you come from, where did you go? Where did you come from, cotton eye Joe?

A French Derpy full of Salt

A French Derpy full of Salt

 

Your """""Weekly"""""" Explosions - Week 2

It's been like 3 month, but anyway... "TORGUE MUNITIONS HAS A POP QUIZ FOR YOU, SKAGLICKER! YOU'RE SURROUNDED BY A DOZEN STEELY-EYED BANDITS! DO YOU: A ) BLOW THEM TO SMITHEREENS WITH YOUR TORGUE ASSAULT RIFLE, B )  RUN AND TAKE COVER, OR C ) CALMLY GET THEM TO PUT THEIR WEAPONS DOWN AND YOU KNOW THE ANSWER IS A! BUY A GODDAMN TORGUE GUN!" - Torgue Radio Ad; Borderlands 2

A French Derpy full of Salt

A French Derpy full of Salt

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