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Excuse me while I rant about Nickelodeon's Breadwinners (again)


Dark Qiviut

7,560 views

If I'm allowed to put a swearword in a title, I would, because it needs it.

 

After re-reading and rewatching angry reviews of Breadwinners, I had the itch to bitch about it again because once isn't enough. I'd stop, but I might've lost a few years of my life, so whatever.

 

Nickelodeon's Breadwinners really pisses me off! If you think modern Spongebob and Sanjay & Craig are at the bottom of the barrel, you ain't seen nothin' yet. Because Breadwinners is much, MUCH worse!

 

How bad?

  1. The animation and character designs are goddamn terrible.
     
    Firstly, the voices don't match the lip-synching sometimes. The movements themselves are very stiff. A bunch of the scenes (hell, almost all of them) rely on stock images slapped and lazily animated, making the scenes look very awkward.
     
    Secondly, these "characters," SwaySway and Behdeuce:
     
    Breadwinners-SwaySway-And-Buhdeuce-In-Rocket-Van-Boyeeeeee-Ducks-Nickelodeon-Nick-Website-Characters-Pondgea-Nicktoons-Nicktoon-Bread-Winners.jpg
     
    In case you're wondering, yeah, they're supposed to be ducks. Instead, they're geometric blobs. Flash is a tool to create great animation. Like Friendship Is Magic, Johnny Test, and Littlest Pet Shop, Breadwinners uses Flash, too, but doesn't put in the effort to design characters that look like ducks or smoothly animate their puppets!
     
    When Johnny Test, a widely panned cartoon, understands the tools of Flash animation better than Breadwinners, you're doing something wrong!
  2. The "humor" is stupid. Every "kid" joke relies on flatulence or a reference to a butt. The toilet humor is abundant, out of place, and lazy. They pretty much can't think of any joke beyond this or a disturbing "Getting Crap Past the Radar" moment. (We'll get to that later!)
     
    Speaking of cheap "humor," these "ducks" have a tendency to twerk. Yeah, a show with a content rating of TV-Y7 contains a sexually provocative dance. And it's not rare, either.
  3. The two main "characters"? Who are they? The two ducks who are supposed to be two, yet have almost the same personality? They aren't characters. They're obnoxious, disrespectful, stupid caricatures who will annoy the hell out of anyone who wishes to watch the "cartoon" with their brains turned on.
  4. The plots are shallow at best and creepy at worst. There's a lot of filler to slow the pace. It ignores its own continuity. Some of the concepts and resolutions create unfortunate implicationd. It relies on disturbing "humor" and stupidity to bypass any resemblance of logic or sense. Hell, they break the rules of their own show sometimes to pander to kids.
     
    To make it worse, many of the episodes rip off other Nickelodeon cartoons. And not just the good ones, either. Even objectively horrible episodes from modern Nick episodes (including ones from modern Spongebob) are ripped off into Breadwinners.
     
    The "creepy" part? Some episodes rely on stereotypes for a cheap laugh: Thug Loaf, for example, uses racist stereotypes as a joke. Another episode tortures a main character for simple laughs.
     
    And then there's one that was loudly bashed online: Love Loaf.
     
    If you want to read the synopsis, click the "spoiler."
     
     
     
    As they mine for bread, they find a love loaf that nearly killed them. The love loaf will make the consumer fall in love with the first person in sight. SwaySway, who's head over heels for a stock-imaged duck named Jenny Quackles, wants to have her eat the bread so she can fall in love with him, have plenty of ducks and live together for life. But Jenny's in a girl's only summer camp, so they infiltrate in disguise. Near the end, they get caught by camp counselors and kicked out, but Sway won't leave until Jenny eats the love loaf. (Yeah, that ain't creepy. dry.png )
     
    That night, they invade who they think is Quackles's cabin (and the door tile #6 flips to #9 as they slam it [yeah, a 69 reference]). Sway sings a disturbing song to the sleeping "duck"…who turns out to be the three camp counselors that confronted them earlier. The officials eat the bread and fall in love with the two ducks. They kiss them to the point of getting smashed into a wall, brawl, hold the ducks against their will, and then lick them. The ducks run away with only their underwear and leave the camp.
     
    Yes, this episode — in a cartoon "suitable" for kids five and up — USES A FUCKING LAZY RAPE JOKE!!
     
     

The saddest part? This show was rated #1 for kids ages 2-11 for a few weeks…and it's being renewed for a second season.

  • Brohoof 7

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I watched it once. I was pretty okay with it.

 

1) They're going for a specific style. Of course some shows look more polished using the same animation tools, but they aren't all meant to look the same. The animation itself looks fine in my opinion, and I've noticed no lip syncing issues.

 

2) I agree, but then I figure a lot of the things I found funny as a kid probably aren't that funny now, our senses of humor have developed, we remember things as funny, but if we watch them now, they probably aren't what we remember.

 

3) I'm fine with the characters. I don't think you want to like them, so everything they do annoys you, I'm not saying I've never done this, but they're not as bad as you describe.

 

4) Many kids shows have creepy themes, watch "Courage the Cowardly Dog." Yes some of the plots are shallow, but what do you expect? You're asking for a rich narrative from a kids show. I think stereotypes are funny, and many shows use pain as a source of laughter. 

 

I'm fine with your opinion, but I don't really see what's so bad about the show. I'm not going to over-analyze a show meant for kids ages "2-11" especially considering I'm 16, and didn't mind it at all. =)
 

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I've noticed a proliferation of "bro"-centric animated shows. Adventure Time, Regular Show, Sanjay & Craig, Breadwinners. 

 

Like do young boys not make friends with each other anymore?

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There's no way it's worse than Fanboy and Chum Chum, but I have been wrong before

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Sanjay and Craig I find really funny, not sure why though. I guess it's because it's more random and to me doesn't rely on flatulence, annoying crap, and...twerking...ugh. I also love how they actually give Craig the personality of a snake, and don't shift from that at all. -3-

I have never watched Breadwinners, but when I saw the preview for the commercial and seen them twerking and stuff, I NOPED out of even going near it. The preview was very obnoxious, the characters look like geometric boogers that came out of a child's nostril, and the thought about two loonies collecting bread sounds very boring if you ask me. 

Have we run out of ideas?

 

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There's no way it's worse than Fanboy and Chum Chum, but I have been wrong before

It's possibly worse.

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Nickelodeon today is a complete farce that I really think should either cease to exist or take a top-down overhaul. They have shown nothing but a complete lack of inspiration and a complete disrespect for quality ever since SpongeBob got big and hauled in cash by the shipload. I've pretty much stopped giving a damn about what shows up on that channel anymore. The last new show I watched on there was TUFF Puppy, and that one got old quickly.

  • Brohoof 2
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I don't like this show at all, but that goes for Nickelodeon in general recently. Nickelodeon is horrible now, and that can't be nostalgia talking, because I don't think Cartoon Network or Disney are doing all that bad right now. Sure all of these channels have their fair share of stinkers, but I don't see any good in the new Nick shows (minus the aforementioned TUFF Puppy which was decent)

  • Brohoof 1
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I watched maybe one or two episodes of this garbage with my cousins (ages 12 and 8) one day, and all I can say is that is was very memorable for all of the wrong reasons. Nickelodeon has shoveled out some serious stinkers over the past decade, but this "Breadwinners" certainly takes the prize for the worst animated atrocity yet. I don't think I've seen a more nauseating cartoon from Nick in all of its history. I was repulsed, to say the very least. I don't think a program this mind-numbing belongs on a station for children.

 

Nice writeup though, DQ, you nailed it big time.

  • Brohoof 1
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