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Night time Ramblings

Moved to Elsewhere


So, Christmas is pretty much over. I had a decent Christmas and all, got some good presents that I can enjoy and all. But this blog isn't about that since I already posted what I got for Christmas in the thread for it. What I'm here to talk about is something related to Christmas, family time.


We all know those huge family gatherings that happen usually around the holidays. For example, I'm down in Memphis right now visiting my step family for Christmas with like 10 people in the house. I usually enjoy that fine (though some of them do annoy me when they talk about stuff I personally don't like). I'm talking about when cousins, aunts, and uncles visit.


I've always secretly hated it.


Even as a kid, I loathed it. I just didn't know it because my mom would always tell me how exciting it is. But personally, I always felt left out in everything. There are no cousins my age, so I could never relate to or hang out with anyone since my siblings always hung out with the cousins around their age. I always just followed the older kids but still felt left out especially when they would watch something that I was too young for. I would try to hang out with the younger kids since they're younger and they're worse than the older ones. They are spoiled brats who act like they know everything. One of them is like a bully who always tries to get under my skin and take my stuff and gets away with it. Oh how I sometimes wanna punch him.


I also feel like I haven't done as much as my family. I would always hear about how my family has done so much in their life like get jobs, get married, go off to college, etc. Well I was always in the exact same area I was before. Just a minor complaint.


So this is why I've always hated big family gatherings. Well it's nice to see these people again since you don't see them as much, all these reasons just make it feel like more of a chore than a treat to me.

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I know that feel. My parents would always make me go to family gatherings in order to hang out with the kids. Only that I'd feel really out of place, either because the other kids were way too young, or the kids my age were the "Cholo" types

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Totally agree, it is very difficult for me to put on a smile at big family outings, my family acts like I am going to immediately interact and be accepted into the conversation yet they go on about things I wouldn't and really shouldn't have a clue about and then go on to question why I wasn't interacting. It just really behooves me that they expect me to be all buddy buddy with these people I see maybe 3 times a year and are double if not triple my age, I make an effort, but it isn't going to happen in a 2 hour span.

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