I just feel like every time I'm nice to a friend that I knew in high school they just want something of me and i give it to them but not once have they ever thanked me or thought to include me. Sometimes I wish I could go back and do things differently but most times I'd rather not. What's really been bugging me lately is that I've come to realize that if I even try to make friends I always somehow end up pushing people away even I don't intend to. I guess I do that because way back when...I was always the shy girl....no one wanted to be my friend...no one wanted to get to know me.....no one bothered to.....no one included me.....no one wanted me......they just saw my shyness as a wall and no one ever tried to break it down....no one ever wanted me as a friend....no one took my emotions seriously and it felt like they would always take my kindness for granted....I've been on my own a lot in school.....ever since graduating high school...after having known those people for that long it's been hard to let anyone get close. In freshman year of high school I was pretty fat...no one wanted anything to do with me but after losing all that weight suddenly they did...and I saw them for what they really are....shallow and cruel people. I thought the whole world was truly that shallow...until I made an account on this site....for once people wanted to get to know me, and I should try harder to get to know them.....you guys are the first people that actually want to be my friend and I'm grateful for that. Joining this fandom and learning about the magic of friendship has taught me that not everyone is the same and that you should be grateful for your blessings. I love you all, and I appreciate each and every one of you. Thank you for taking the time to see me as I truly am and not for the shy and awkward girl that no one really talked to. Thank you for listening to my emotional rants. But most of all, thank you for being a friend.