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TheTaZe's Thoughts

TheTaZe

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I'm going to use this blog as a journal like place for me to express my thoughts that may not be appropriate for a status update or a thread in itself.

 

Let's start out with something that has been bugging me personally. Do you ever have thoughts of your past haunting you to this day? I've gone under many names during my years on the Internet and this current alias has been the one I've been under the longest. I've had this name since the very beginning of 2014. Admittedly, I have done bad things under this name in the past. I've a jerk to many people and have done some just ugly things that no one wants to know about (not sexually charged or anything, god no). I am admittedly not a fan of my past self. It hasn't been until the recent past year that I wanted to move past my "troll" like behavior and branch out to people. MLPForums is just another stepping stone in my harrowing journey as a person. I thanked you guys for almost a month of support in my last blog and I mean it entirely. I just hope that if any of you do somehow find out about the certain things I've done in the past that it doesn't take away to how you view me as a person.

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The past is the past, what matters is who we are now and that we learn from the mistakes we've made. :kindness:

And regretting things you've posted on the internet is a familiar feeling to me, as well. I don't think I've trolled or done such things in ages, but there are things that would have been better left unposted – some posts that make me cringe reading them now. Also the reason why I rarely use the same username on more than one forum. :P

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1 minute ago, Tacodidra said:

The past is the past, what matters is who we are now and that we learn from the mistakes we've made. :kindness:

And regretting things you've posted on the internet is a familiar feeling to me, as well. I don't think I've trolled or done such things in ages, but there are things that would have been better left unposted – some posts that make me cringe reading them now. Also the reason why I rarely use the same username on more than one forum. :P

I was honestly thinking if I should change my username to something like my OC's name to distance myself away from my main alias but I don't think I would like a change like that. So for the immediate future, I am keeping this name (Plus I can't change it if I wanted to since I ran out of name change options for this month :please:)

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I have a bad past too, I've screwed many things up in the past but under different names which I never want to see mentioned again. The past has helped me improve, though.

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My past is something that I'm not proud of. I was reckless and foolish. 

I've said things and done things, that I personally consider horrible. I've have been called a horrible person and I still feel guilty. I wish that I could travel through time and stop those from happening. Truth be told, I don't have the ability to that. As time moves forward, so am I. I think that I've allowed myself to become a better person and hope that I can continue to improve myself. 

You seem like a genuine person TaZe and I won't view you under a negative mindset for what you've done in the past, in contrast to yourself now. 

Edited by Cash In
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5 minutes ago, Cash In said:

My past is something that I'm not proud of. I was reckless and foolish. 

I've said things and done things, that I personally consider horrible. I've have been called a horrible person and I still feel guilty. I wish that I could travel through time and stop those from happening. Truth be told, I don't have the ability to that. As time moves forward, so am I. I think that I've allowed myself to become a better person and hope that I can continue to improve myself. 

You seem like a genuine person TaZe and I won't view you under a negative mindset for what you've done in the past, in contrast to yourself now. 

I wanted to respond to this before I went to bed. I really do like you, Cash In. You are part of the WPCC family that I view to enjoy company with. You are a very genuine person even if you view yourself in a negative light sometimes. Just wanted to say that I'm thankful I have people like you around.

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26 minutes ago, TheTaZe said:

I wanted to respond to this before I went to bed. I really do like you, Cash In. You are part of the WPCC family that I view to enjoy company with. You are a very genuine person even if you view yourself in a negative light sometimes. Just wanted to say that I'm thankful I have people like you around.

TaZe, that is probably one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me.  

Hearing someone say that, tells me that I've come a long way in improving myself. Yes, I do view myself negatively and while I'm not sure if I'm that genuine of human being, I'm still glad that you feel that way. I may not have known you for long, but understand that I'm incredibly glad that to have you as a friend. 

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My online past wasn't that bad. I've made some mistakes of course, but I think these are nothing to be worried about. :P 

My real life past though... It's full of regrets... It's not that I was mean or something.. I just made tons and tons of mistakes, that I didn't manage to avoid. I did many stupid things, I made many wrong choices and it all is haunting me to this day. I'm so disappointed in me whenever I remind myself something from the past. Sometimes I just wish I could start everything from the very beginning. Heh, my past definitely isn't something I'm proud of. :rarity:
Now I can only hope, that my future will be brighter than my past.

 

As for you @TheTaZe and everybody above - you all are really nice and your past will not change that. The only thing that is important is how I see you now, not how I could imagine you be seeing your past. Nobody is perfect. It's just good to have you all around. :) 

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