My Weight Loss Journey
Entry posted by ~Master~ Button Mash
1,297 views
I'm a changing man. In the last few months I've begun a journey to become the person I've, deep down, always wanted to be. And since my brony family here gives me so much support, I thought I should fill you guys in on the journey I've been on. You've given me so much strength and support to continue on this journey, and in fact, being a brony has played a direct role in setting me on this journey. 
So, if I'm going to fill you in on my journey, I might as well begin at the very start. I'll just spoiler it for space sake.
When I was a little kid living in Texas, I lived a very healthy life. I took swimming lessons, I was taking gymnastics and tae kwon do lessons, and I had a healthy food intake. I was on a pretty good road to being a healthy, active teen and adult, and I was happy. But then something happened...
...moving back to Chicago happened.
After being gone since I was one year old, my family relocated back to Chicago about the time I was in the third grade. We lived with my cousin in Jefferson Park for six months. It was a stressful time, even if you're 8, you still have roots you begin to put down. Maybe it was that stress, combined with the fact that I was now caught in the middle of a concrete jungle peppered with fast food joints, but I stopped being active and started just lounging around and eating. Discovering video games around this time didn't really help, either. But that's where it started. A cycle of lounging and eating. The habits set in and I began to pudge up by the time we finally settled into a new house. Around 4th grade I started being labelled an "ADHD child" and the stress of being in therapy (which turned out to be absolute scam bullshit) only exacerbated the problem. Food and games became my safety blanket. In fact I almost flunked out of the 4th grade because of my Gamecube, but that's another story for another time.
Around the same time I began to be bullied, both because of my weight and the lethargic behavior that those ADHD pills gave me. As the stress got worse, the eating and weight got worse, which made the bullying worse, which made the eating worse. A vicious cycle.
4th grade, 5th grade, 6th grade, 7th grade (I came off my ADHD medication, thank god), 8th grade. The cycle continued. The bullying got really bad by 7th and 8th grade that I think that is about the time I can pin down that I began to develop Avoidant Personality Disorder.
By the time I got into high school, I was in my own little world. I loathed physical activity, binge ate on a daily basis, and survived on about 5 hours of sleep a night. I pretty went through all four years in a depressed stupor. My only extraciricular was the rocket club in freshman and sophmore year, then I quit and pretty much fell into the "wake up, school, home, repeat" mode. Sports? No. Job? Nope. Girlfriend or boyfriend? God no. At least by junior year I finally made a couple true friends to hang out with. Still, though, I was so depressed with life that I didn't even bother with the college admissions process during senior year. I decided I would just take a gap year, but unlike most who use their gap year to do something productive, I sat at home and played Xbox.
At my worst I hit 230 pounds. For someone whose 5'8"...you do the math.
When I first came to college, the first semester was pretty much the same thing. Sure, I was a bit more social, but I was still distant emotionally. Oddly, though, I actually lost a bit of weight during the first semester. My depression began to kill my appetite. Overall, though, more of the same.
If you're keeping track, that continued for 11 years. I stabilized at about 215-220 until again, something happened...
...the brony community happened. Be warned, though, the story gets more than a little weird at this point, because one of the factors that started me on this journey was...well...clop.
Let me explain. A few months ago during one of the clop debate threads, an open/proud clopper by the screen name Sturdy Wing. He offered to send people clop pictures if they wanted and PM'd him their email. I took up the offer out of curiosity, and afterwards we continued to talk through the PMs. We became friends, and he began to tell me about his goals of being an Olympic swimmer. He's already in pre-Olympic training, so he might very well be in Rio in 2016. Look for the guy with the Rainbow Dash cutie mark tattoo. 
Anyway, growing up fat around all the stereotypical jocks in high school, I developed a hatred for athletics. Thanks to him, he helped me break down my hatred, see just how fun and enriching playing sports can be, and just how much I was missing out on in life by being so out of shape. Not just in sports, but just how much more one can enjoy life by being in shape.
(Now for another factor that made me change, but be warned, it's a little gross)
At about the same time I developed an extremely painful cyst in a very sensitive place called a pilonidal cyst. I'll just leave it at that, if you want to know more...Google is your friend. Anyway, it was by far the most horrible pain I have ever been in in my entire life. Just imagine a knife being stabbed and twisted into you every time you made the slightest movement. For two days I was completely bed ridden, because if I tried to move I would get lightheaded from the pain. The one time I actually forced myself out of bed, I passed out. Sure enough, as I researched treatments, I came across the cause, and sure enough, they are caused by the kind of unhealthy lifestyle I was living. Needless to say, I would NEVER want to go through that again.
So, with the combined inspiration of Sturdy Wing, the painful experience of that cyst, and both the inspiration of the brony community as a whole, and my own self being fed up with my lifestyle, I decided to change.
After a few days of intense crying (yes, coming to this epiphany was a very emotional time, realizing I wasted 11 years of my life...the best years of my life) I started going to the gym. And I kept going, and I kept going. Every single day, for on average two hours a day, for the last month and a half. I do cardio, I lift, and I don't stop until I'm satisfied. I've completely cut soda and junk food out of my diet. Hell, I just turned down a bunch of mini Reese's cups from the RAs. There's no cheat days in my life.
And in that time, I've lost over 15 pounds, and put on a fair bit of muscle. I still have a long journey ahead of me, but every day I leave the gym stronger and healthier than the last, and if I keep up for long enough, I can turn back the clock on those 11 lost years.
I know it sounds crazy, because most people don't decide to make a decision like this so late in their development, but I want to make up for all those lost years and become an athlete. I want to be more like Sturdy Wing and Rainbow Dash. I want to become the person I probably would've been had I stayed in Texas. And I have faith that if I keep up my dedication and discipline, I can make my athletic dreams a reality. (Rugby or platform diving, by the way).
It's time for this pegasus to spread his wings.
Pony on, everyone. /)
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