Artist: m1dy

Title: Speedcore Dandy XXX

Label: Intikrec, Nest

Cat. #: INR006, NIP001

Release Date: November 11th, 2003

Format: CD, Unmixed

Tracklist:

01. Face Is

02. Innocent

03. SpeedCoreDandy

04. Crash

05. Sin

06. H.C. Swindle

07. Jampin' Jap Crash

08. REAF

09. KumonEverybody

10. 37 Dicks

11. BadBoy

12. TokyoStyleSpeedCore

Review:

So, my first review request is a speedcore album. I never, ever though that it'd be possible. NEVER, EVER. Like, seriously, who requests this kind of stuff? Anyway, as the pro reviewer that I am (?), I decided to accept this request, even if it was against my good judgement.

I do not know anything about this artist, but the cover artwork tells me that he either comes from Japan, or he is just really into lolicon. Or both (Note: after writing this review I found out more about this artist. Indeed, he's from Japan, but nothing has been said or written about his hentai taste. Thank Celestia nothing has been said...). Anyway, this was released back in 2003, when Warp Brothers were really famous, Chemical Brothers were about to "Galvanize" us and Trance was really hard and epic (unlike the thing it has become nowadays).

Before I continue, I have to tell you something: I HATE SPEEDCORE. So this review will definitely make you laugh with my reactions. I do understand the point of this genre, but it is so not-for-me. Anyway, even if it seems like this is a bad album, please continue reading. You might find some surprises.

Now that my mind is set, let's listen to this...

The album kicks off with "Face Is" and the musical taste here is as confusing as the title. I swear to Celestia, this track is about to annoy the s%&/ out of me (is that even possible?!). This is not the best way to introduce an album. Oh, King Sombra, if you save me I'll become part of the black order or whatever your cult's name is.

Thank Luna! That was fast (no pun intended... Perhaps). But the next track is "Innocent". It starts with a little pitched up D&B section that doesn't take too long to become speedcore/gabber. Surprisingly, there are male vocals. The guy rapping is not bad, and this track is enjoyable! Even the over the top kick feels really good, and the lead gives this track that little "melodic" feeling that I know is lost in this genre.

"SpeedCoreDandy", come on! When I finally though this album was about to become at least listenable... Speedcore comes back to remind me that this is, indeed, speedcore. I don't know if just got used to it or something, but I'm kind of understanding the point of this. This track is not that special, but I like the pads. hopefully, the rest of the album will be more like this (or at least more Yoji Biomehanika and less "scream-looped-to-dead").

(Talking about "scream-looped-to-dead"...) "Crash" is the next track. And the freakin' scream is annoying! But, the structure is well made. Don't know why, but this one reminds me a little bit of Tiësto's percussions back in 2004. Time to move on, nothing else to say.

When "Sin" kicks in, I finally find something that's worth to listen to. Maybe is the fact that I'm used to lower BPMs, but this one is definitely good. The Techno feeling in this one is strong! And the nice bassline + the looped trumpet (it is a trumpet, right? I really can't tell due to the great bassline that keeps getting my attention) are lovely.

Now, time to go back to the speedcore. "H.C. Swindle" is another one of those tracks whose musical taste is as confusing as the title. Even the "lead" here LEADS to nowhere. All I can listen to is noise+noise+noise+some male vocals in japanese.

Dear Celestia, will this never end? "Jampin' Jap Crash" feels so... Glitchy. Wait... That's the point! Hey, at least m1dy managed to include some lovely glitch into this speedcore. But come on! My ears are so... Hurt? Well, not exactly. But this doesn't tell me anything.

Just when I though nothing could be faster, "RAEF" comes as a "f*ck you and your thoughs". I just can't remember any part of this track. Nothing stands out, just because it is too f*ckin' fast!

Next track: "KumonEverybody". This one I still can't manage to understand. It's like a car crash: everything happens so fast that when it finishes, you're still figuring out how it happened. Can't. Say. Anything. Else.

"37 Dicks". Seriously, WTF?! I'm 24, what is this? I can't even... WTF?! This track is a clusterf*ck! Anime chick sexual screaming, some black dude saying something about sucking dicks and the famous "play that funky music, white boy" line.

"BadBoy" was inspired on the Bad Boys 2 movie. Just like any Michael Bay, this track has a lot of BOOM! but barely substance. At least is not as bad as "37 Dicks", but it is still pretty much a "BadBoy".

Is this about to finish?! But it was so short!.. Aww :c I was having so much fun!.. Not. Let's just say good-bye with "TokyoStyleSpeedCore". Even though the "This is motherf*ckin' Tokyo Style Speedcore" line is memorable (?), the rest of the track can go f*ck itself. Didn't get it.

Final thoughs:

Would I recommed this? HELL NO!.. But it wasn't THAT bad. I've heard worst speedcore albums and, again, I seriously hate speedcore. I did find some nice tracks in this one, and enjoyed some parts. It has a really awesome mixdown + mastering and could always tell the different sounds (except on the "noisy track" I don't remember right now). Anyway, let's just finish this up before going to the pharmacy for some aspirines.

4.6/10 Solidpoints.

Oh, and @@Soundgarden... Thanks (I guess?) for the request. I'm still interested in any album/torture you'd like to request me, so keep it coming!