Best MLP/Brony thing I've read lately
>At Walmart shopping for pony toys
>As usual
>See another brony in the pink aisle
>Female
>Blonde
>A solid 10 years old
>About to greet her from behind with surprise hugs
>Notice she just picked up the last Fluttershy
>Nope
>Try to nab the box from her
>She's too strong
>Starts calling out for her mom
>Plastic slipping from my grasp
>Prick her with the point of my Pinkie Pie pony pin
>She drops the toy and runs off screaming
>This is what victory looks like
>A crying infant with an overpriced pin stuck in her arm
>Forget store Manager and 3 Security guards were following me the entire time
>Manager tries to grab Fluttershy
>Knocks my fedora to the ground
>Brohoof him in the face
>Assertive as buck
>Make a dash for the exit
>ha ha lol dash
>Security guards block my path
>Gotta detour down the pasta aisle
>No, my IQ of 177 tells me that would be too predictable
>Take the freezer aisle instead
>20% cooler xD
>Met with a phalanx of beanbag guns
>SWAT Team arrived in ten seconds flat
>They open fire with rubber bullets
>My fursuit absorbs most of the impact
>Security is fast approaching my flank
>lol flenk LOLOLO
>Flutterrage mode: engaged
>Hold aloft the lifesize cardboard cutout of my OC
>SWAT is blinded by the colour scheme
>Scream my mighty battlecry as I charge
"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYY"
>They fire blindly, tazers deflected by my aegis of originality
>I lose my trilby in the barrage
>Plough through the ranks of haters
>What remains is a heap of sobbing, confused men
>Hop like Pinkie to checkout
>Clerk is cowering behind cash register
>Cute
>reminds me of Fluttershy
>who I place on the counter
>pull out my wallet (pic related)
>It's empty
>Spent all my cash the wallet
>Can't afford toy
>Leave Store without buying anything
How embarrassing.
- 1
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