Emerald Heart

A calm washed over 16- year-old Ava Collins as she watched the ocean flow. It was a sight that she had always loved, and helped melt the stress away. Especially in situations like this. She felt a pang in her heart, and leaned over in the bench she was sitting on, shaking her head in dismay. Being alone had never bothered her before, but when Darian Brian had confronted her after school earlier at day and confessed his feelings for her… she had laughed. Hard. She didn’t believe him. But then she saw the hurt look on his face, and the laughter died down. Ava had been on her own for so long she hadn’t ever thought that anyone would take any sort of interest in her. She was a lost soul. 

She had apologized profoundly, grabbing him by his elbow and tugging him back, not knowing why she was making such a big deal out of this. Sure, she hurt a guy’s feelings. It’s not like she was close to him. It’s not that she liked him. She hadn’t even known he existed until today. Because Ava lived in her own world, constantly tuning everyone out and pushing them away. No one bothered to speak to her, so why would anyone like her? She was just a girl. Just boring, pasty-faced, Ava Collins.

She looked herself over in the mirror once she was home, trying to make out anything quite appealing. But, no- all she saw was her boring, brown frizzy locks, her freckled skin, and her horrible complexion. There was nothing beautiful about her.

It was such a stupid idea. Such a horrible idea.

But she confronted him anyway.

“What makes me so interesting?” She asked, getting straight to the point, “I don’t understand why you have feelings for me.”

“What do you mean?” Darian reached for her hand, which she swatted away. She didn’t like when people touched her. The teenage boy just rolled his eyes and rubbed the back of his neck, “I mean, you’re different from the other girls. You’re so reserved, chill, I can never understand what’s going on inside your mind.”

“So I’m an enigma?”

“I suppose so.” He nodded, pretending like he knew what the word meant, “Why do you ask?”

“It’s just been bothering me.” Ava admitted, crossing her arms and looking down at the ground, “I just sort of assumed that nobody noticed me at this school.”

“Oh, please.” Darian scoffed, “I’ve been crushing on you hard ever since last year.” He admitted, “And I’d like to hang out with you if you don’t mind.”

“What, like a date?”

“If you’ll let me.”

“No.”

His expression saddened and he began to walk away. 

Goshdarnit, she had done it again.

“Ugh!” Ava groaned, throwing her arms up into the air and walking away, ignoring the looks she was getting from the other students, you don’t need him. She convinced herself, you don’t need anyone. Friendship and romance are downward spirals. That’s what Mom always said.

But then he talked to her the next time, holding food in his hands. He offered her a taco and nervously, she took it. Darian was a weird kid. Even so, she wasn’t going to say no to free food. 

He sat with her at lunch the day after that. Ava should have said something, but she didn’t. She owed it to be nice to him after her crappy attitude. She wasn’t a total monster… right?

Then he asked her to go with him to the arcade to play video games. Once again, Ava said yes. She shouldn’t have, but she did. 

It turns out that he was pretty good at video games, is this what it feels like to have fun? Ava wondered, biting down on her lower lip.