Summer 2014
During the MLPF World Cup pony picture posting poll (yes I forced alliteration on you all ... and I don't feel the least bit bad), I kept seeing a user who joined just a few weeks before me occasionally popping in with a hilarious comment or two. I liked this guy almost immediately. Who was Kel? Imagine Robin Williams crossed with Gary Busey and a dash of internet troll DNA spliced in. He was, simply put, fucking hilarious. He was also clever. He could poke fun of the fandom at the same time poking fun of himself. He was also a capable debater and had a gift with satire and absurdity. There are many members that have slipped away, and Kel's humor is some I miss the most. I can tell you that he probably made the staff go prematurely grey because some of his content was definitely pushing the edge of shitposting and what have you, but from the perspective of the casual member here ... he could always made a rough day better with his insanity.
The Church of Celestia
After seeing a topic on 4chan about waifu weddings, among other things, Kel was inspired to create an thread in the Forum Lounge with a title that is perhaps the only boring thing about it:
Minister KelGrym's Religious Services. Even though I will highlight the best quotes in here, I think everyone should just pop in and read the content for its creative frivolity. I say that in full knowledge that Key would have had Celestia banish be for implying anything about her was frivolous. His 'origin' story was freaking hilarious. It boils down to him being saved by Celestia after being attacked by a Gary Busey tumored hell hound. No I did not make that up. Post is here and spoilered below
My reaction to reading that was jumping between "What the hell did I just read?" and this:
That was a typical reaction to a Kel post.
Rules of Celestia
The rules and commandments were simple.
Guidelines for Membership:
Place your right hand over your heart and with your left hand, ball it into a fist, extend your index finger and hold index finger over your head as if it were a unicorn horn. Repeat the Celestian Oath. Uphold the Celestian Commandments. Help your Celestian brothers and sisters and the brony community in general. Love and Tolerate the infedels non-believers. The Celestial Commandments
Thou shalt have no other Goddess before the Trinity. (Celestia, Luna, Twilight) Thou may have Luna and Twlight to worship, but thou shalt worship mostly Celestia. Cadence shall not be worshipped at all. Screw Cadence. Thou shalt be Honest Thou shalt be Loyal to thy brethren and friends. (but not above thy loyalty to Celestia) Thou shalt be Kind Thou shalt be Generous Thou shalt be Optimistic in Life, for Celestia is coming quickly and shall end all woe. Thou shalt freely enjoy the Magic of Friendship, and share that joy in the name of Celestia. Thou shalt never waste a slice of cake.
The inside joke with Cadance pays off later when he marries Cadance to a member. Which brings me to the best thing about this whole thread.
Tubby Wubby Pony Waifu Weddings
How this worked, if I remember correctly, is that you would request that Kel marry you to your pony waifu, volunteering yourself to basically be part of the hilarity. He would schedule a time and create a Skype chat group with friends and witnesses. Someone would play the part of cannon characters (including the bride :P), and he would - in hilarious fashion - conduct the wedding. There are still members who post here that received his services. @Flutter Baby <3 and @C.B married Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie respectively. I personally loved the Pinkemena and Cadance weddings.
And in the midst of all this, Scootaloo beat Celestia in a crazy come from behind win in the MLPF World Cup. This was the response.
Now, its worth mentioning that while Kel was hilarious at the time, he has gone through over a year of personal hell that he mentioned in his blog. He admits that all this was funny, but he no longer endorses it. That said, it was part of why I found MLPF an entertaining and unpredictable place to engage, and Kel's topic remains a huge part of why I look back on that time with fond memories. We once talked about launching a fake Religious Civil War between the Church of Celestia and the Congregation of Fabulosity, but my becoming staff made that problematic so it was canned. Anyway, it was a fun few moments on here of crazy, and I for one appreciated it. Where ever you are Kel, good luck to you man. Maybe we will see you grace us again.
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