Hurricane

Could you critique my OC Hurricane please? Link in sig I know the backstory is a little grimdark, I will probably change some of that.

ISTP - Mulan - Robin Hood (Disney) - Black Widow - Wesley (Princess Bride) - Han Solo - Katniss

When Steel addressed her, Hurricane just smirked knowing that it was truly Steel who stood before them, but as Royal spoke to him, she couldn't help but feel sorry for Steel when she saw his emotions melt to sadness when he heard the news of Quickdraw. Those two really were great friends. Hurricane's sympathy was short lived because of the joy she felt when Steel agreed to come back. She really didn't know what to say except for "Great!"

5

@@Pripyat Pony, Midnight was still calming down from the excitement of her latest act. "That's great!" she said as a free response without thinking. After a second of processing what Clover had actually said, she replied. "wait, a dance competition? Are we entering that? I can barely walk on these...these sticks." she said as she gestured to her legs.

Hurricane walked up to Steel. "You died, stupid!" she tried to explain as briefly as possible. "We all saw you go. Your here cause your dead." she then took a breath. "We're asking you to come back to the normal world with us. This is some fancy, peaceful, holy place where to go when you die."

Hurricane admired Devil Chord's earings. She gave a confused look when Devil Chord complimented her mane. "My mane?" she asked to make sure she heard correctly. "Thanks. Nopony has ever complimented my mane before." she brought it up to her face. "It's usually messy and windblown like this. Not all straight and put together like most ponies'"

Hurricane's eyes widened with astonishment at the sight of Steel. "Steel? Is...is it really you?" she asked as she slowly walked toward him. "Please come back to Equestria with us. I think I speak for all of us when I say you left too soon." Hurricane badly wanted Steel to come back. She doesn't normally get attached to ponies, but this was different. This group was different and Steel was part of that group.

@@Gloomfury, ((Maybe its because I'm typing on BB Code Mode, but that's the only way I can include mentions.)) Hurricane smiled at Devil Chord's compliment. Most ponies saw her as thieving, good for nothing street rat. "Thanks." she said sitting up straighter and puffing out her chest slightly. She opened her wings. They were larger that normal ponies, but fit her body well as she was slightly taller that most ponies. "These babies give me the power I need to do what I do." she said before folding them back in. "You have great style by the way." Hurricane tried to give a compliment back.

@@Gloomfury, Before Hurricane could respond, Devil Chord started strumming her guitar. Hurricane just sat back and listed to the beautiful music she played. It soothed her and she could feel herself becoming more relaxed. After Devil Chord had finished, Hurricane spoke up. "Wow, Devil Chord, that was really nice." she said. She was very impressed, but spoke rather cooly. "You can really play."

@@Gloomfury, "Oh ya, My name's Hurricane." she said cooly. "My talent is making one heck of a wind storm." she proudly mentioned. "I can make some pretty awesome things happen. I think I can guess I can guess your talent." she looked at Devil's guitar. "But I don't know your name either."

Hurricane was caught off guard by the coin hitting Devil Chord. She didn't have time to do anything about it before Blazed Time began talking. Hurricane wanted to respond to him out loud, but in her head she replied, That's kinda why she was here. Hurricane was getting slightly annoyed. She didn't plan on talking to an entire group of ponies, she really only wanted to speak to Devil Chord. She had also forgotten her muffin she set on top of the lamp post she was previously on. Hurricane just decided to stay just to see where the conversation would go.

Midnight was exploring the school walking down halls and peeking through windows. In one of them, she saw a terrarium with a toad inside of it sitting on a fake rock. The room appeared to be empty so she entered. The chalk on the board read: BIOLOGY. Midnight quickly made her way to the toad in the tank. As she shifted her gaze, her eyes filled with horror. There was a notecard next to the glass tank with a diagram of a frog dissection with steps. She looked back to the toad napping on his plastic rock. She began to speak to it. Her talent was her special connection to animals after all. (although it works better with creatures of the unknown.) "Look at me." she said to it in a very serious whisper. The toad lifted its lazy eyes. "You have to get out of here. They're gonna do bad things to you. I'll let you out the window and you have to hop away. Far away!" she shouted still in a whisper. Midnight proceeded to open a window leading out side and picked up the now wide awake amphibian. "Keep hopping and don't look back." she said as she dropped it on the ground out side. She then quickly closed the window and made her way out of the room. Midnight swiftly walked down halls and looked behind her until she ran into Clover. She let out a shriek. "Oh, its you." she said in a sigh of relief.

Hurricane followed the Custodian as he took Steele and began to go somewhere. She listened intently to the story of the Keeper and found it incredibly hard to believe that he was once kind and caring. Her mind was filling so many thoughts like Clover's test and the Keeper and Steele and Divines. It was so much coming so quickly. She was finally snapped away from her thoughts when the Custodian asked if Steele even wanted to come back. "Is there any way to tell if he wants to come back or not?" she asked.

Hurricane was shocked when Lightning Bliss made her final decision not to accept the offer. She saw it as an offer that couldn't be refused, but she accepted Lightning Bliss's decision and smiled back to her. She then turned to Clover to see what she would do. "What do you think Clover? Are you gonna do it?" she asked without showing her extreme curiosity.

@@Gloomfury, "It is pretty great" Hurricane said. "I think we need more of that music. Or at least more ponies that accept that music. I'm personally more of a punk rock type of pony-" She was going to continue her sentence, but then another pony approached them. He seemed pretty excited about what was being played.

@@Gloomfury, After Devil Chord took notice of Hurricane and spoke to her, she came down and landed in front of her. "A sandwich? seriously?" she responded looking annoyed at the idea. "I don't blame you for throwing it back. I would've scheduled them their own personal rain shower." she smirked. "Here." Hurricane said throwing a bit into the guitar case. "And I don't give out money to just anypony, but I don't come across music like that everyday."

Hurricane was flying around the city with a fresh apple cinnamon muffin she had taken from a small stand while the pony working it had stepped away for a few moments. She was in Baltimare for no reason other than she wanted to explore. She was originally from Ponyville, but spent most of her times in the clouds or in the outskirts. Her casual flight was soon interrupted by a blaring guitar noise. She stopped in her tracks and looked down at the rocker mare shredding her guitar and singing the words. Hurricane swooped down and landed on a nearby lamppost. She listened and watched until her song was over. "Any luck yet?" she called down looking to see if any money was in the guitar case.

Midnight shade just rolled her eyes at Gloom's comment. "Thank you princess-" she stopped herself immediately. "I mean principal." She looked around the office and at the pictures on the wall and through the window into the hallway. This was sure to be a new experience.

@@Pripyat Pony, Thank you so much! she looks great!

Midnight stepped into the principal's office. She stared up at the human Luna not quite sure what to make of the sight. She was a huge fan of normal pony Luna, but she didn't think she was too fond of this new Luna. It was too weird for her to see her favorite princess as a completely different creature. Midnight decided to keep caution even though she had no reason too. She kept her distance, but listened to what Luna would say.

Ecstatic Bolt Eccentric Bolt Wild Skies

Midnight stayed quiet while she they were being introduced to the Rainbooms. She didn't know how much she would have to interact with them. She was always more of an introvert and didn't typically like talking to new ponies...or people. Midnight broke into a smile when she heard Sparkle's remark. "We're here on royal business, not for you get a mare friend." she rolled her eyes. "All stallions are the same." She then watched as Gloom carelessly lit his cigar and began to walk around. She coughed a little when she got a whiff of the smoke. She wasn't too fond of his bad attitude. This was an interesting group and led Midnight to expect an interesting journey.

Midnight followed Clover as the stranger escorted them to where they needed to be. She looked around the school in bewilderment as she walked. There were people walking around, some doing other activities like Frisbee and playing guitar. She noticed a small group of kids gathered under a tree with small electronic devices in their hands. they were tapping it and turning it around and reacting as if it were a game. Midnight tried to absorb in everything that had happened. She was just sucked into a new world full of strange creatures and strange things and wasn't even given time to soak it all in before a shadowy group people came for them. This day was so weird.

@, Thank you! I love it so much! Thanks for taking the time to do another one. It really turned out great