Kronos the Revenant

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Posts posted by Kronos the Revenant

  1. When I was a kid

    I asked grandpa to get off me

    At least just 

    **** more softly


    Now my mom buys all my clothes for me

    at Hot Topic

    I look

    Like a Nazi


    I’m pissed all the time

    I can’t wait to see 

    Where the Wild Things Are


    I say words like

    Discombobulated, Melancholy

    I look

    Like a Nazi

    (Sing it like Paparazzi and it goes with the beat)

  2. Kronos looked up and noticed the crude misspellings of the signs. 


    It appears as if they have primitive intellect here, a voice called out to Kronos in his head. 


    I highly doubt any of them have had any sort of formal education for centuries, another more sympathetic voice called out, you can cut them some slack for not knowing how to spell basic words. 


    I don’t care, a ravenous voice called next, Just find something to eat, I’m starving here. 


    Find whatever tools of destruction they left behind, a fourth commanding voice said, And we’ll conquer this part of the Wasteland next. 


    Hold yourselves, guys, Kronos said to his voices, we’ll get to that when or if the time comes. 


    All voices in his head groan at once. 


    He continued his search amongst the rubble and still couldn’t shake his feeling of uneasiness behind him, so he remained alert. 

    • Brohoof 1

  3. Even though the area seemed empty, Kronos took it upon himself to go searching the buildings for supplies, mostly ammunition, food and drinks and junk as he was pretty well-stocked on weaponry. 

    He checked every square centimeter of the area and managed to find a few containers holding few items of value to him, which were mostly trinkets that simply gave him nostalgia of the time before the war. Trinkets he collected included a few foals toys, some rusty old kitchen appliances, a couple of pocket watches, and a few more knick-knacks that simply caught his eye. 


    “It’s quiet around here,” Kronos said while seemingly scanning the area, “too quiet, and I don’t like it one bit.”

    • Brohoof 1

  4. Kronos noticed Quick Strike glancing towards the dilapidated area, clearly looking alert. He stood his guard up as well. 

    He observed the funny little orange pony and contemplated his name. 

    Hehe, he thought to himself, he’s quite a small pony. I could probably off him in one punch. 

    Now, Kronos was a pony that stood on his hind legs, so his stance was often taller than most ponies he encountered, and rarely anyone he crossed paths with were taller than he was. Even on all fours, however, he was slightly taller than average. 

    “Hmm,” Kronos pondered our loud, “Not right? How so?”

    • Brohoof 1

  5. Kronos jerked his head towards the voice calling out to him with an audible mechanical whirring noise. 

    Hmm, Kronos thought to himself, I highly doubt he could see through my concealments. 

    He scanned around for this strange pony. He utilized his built-in SATS system in his cybernetic implant to find whoever it was. 

    “Hmmph,” he grunted with a smirk, “I’m new around these parts. Some of my, uhh, friends told me about this place and I thought I should check it out for myself. Who are you and what’s your name?” 

    He didn’t need to ask as he already scanned the pony with his SATS system, however, he wanted to ensure that his targeting system would change him from “minor threat” to “non-hostile”. However, Kronos kept his plasma rifle brandished regardless of whether or not this pony was friendly or hostile. 

    • Brohoof 2

  6. I hate mosquitoes, Japanese Hornets and Bot Flies. Mosquitoes for obvious reasons, Japanese hornets because they’re huge and are jerks (seriously, they’re like 5 inches long and just one squadron of, like, four of those bastards can wipe out an entire European honeybee colony), and bot flies because of the way they reproduce. They usually latch onto a mosquito and place their eggs on the mosquito’s arse. Then, the mosquito lands on you and your body heat attracts the boy fly eggs. Then the bot fly eggs DIG INTO YOUR SKIN. Then the damn buggers grow INSIDE OF YOUR HEAD AND CREATE HOLES IN YOUR BRAIN. The only way to get rid of them is to find a lump in your head that wiggles, cut a hole, put petroleum jelly on it to draw it out, PULL OUT THE FAT BASTARD, then let the thing SUFFOCATE IN PURE AIR.