Widdershins

Also. 

 Still think they're cute? 

So, I suppose that since the movie made anthros pretty much a thing in Equestria then I can work my two fursonas into this fandom as well? Bit of a work-around, but I suppose there's no restraint now. And yes, you should be afraid whenever I mention a lack of restraint.

   Oh, and as a side note: What exactly was The Storm King's species? They called him cloven once in the movie, but he doesn't have hooves. I assume he was the same as his yeti-like grunts?

   Because I really wanna make a Yeti guy too.

WELL! GOOOOOOOOOOD  NNNEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWSSSSS!

  *Every eardrum in a twelve mile radius bursts*

 Yeesh. Fickle Mortal Ears.

      i WATCHED THE MLP MOVIE, EVERYBEING!

 While I won't divulge any specifics about the movie, there are three very important, status changing revelations that have occured to me as I watched it. They are as follows.

    Death is now an absolute thing in this franchise. I mean, sure, ponied murdered, like all the time back in, what, generation two or something? They just blew baddies up to smithereens all the time. Nineties kids shows, ya know? But this is different. Sure, they later play it for laughs, but that being that died in the movie is totally, straight up dead.  All the way dead. Like, obliterated. No magic lazerbeams, just dead. Completely. Death now exists in Equestria. Sure, capital punishment for leading terrorist attacks on the free world are waved away and forgiven, but hey, we all saw that coming.

  Second Epiphany: @Biohazarddallas? You know that thing I said about being wary of introducing anthro characters into this world? Nope. Disregard. Gates are flown wide open! Any and all! We had full-bore anthro sharks, lizard, hulky rat people, the whole shebang! No limits anymore! Sure, I do like to keep my fandoms separate because it makes me feel more special and hipstery, but the towels thrown now. Whattayagonna do? Granted, I suppose it has to be "show-accurate" kinda a goofy, cartoony kind of anthro, but being bipedal is no longer a rarity. Though... no human attributes I would think... Which would rule out sphinxes, I suppose...

  Third...

   Hello, Everybeing. I'm a Rarity.

  Over-dramatize everything in absolute Best or Worst? Check. Takes pride in quality & stylistic approach in most everything to the point of being kind of a pompous stick about it sometimes? Check. Prone to comfort food? Check.  A High standard-ed Marshmellow? Check! You take the role of a lifetime from me, @Blitz Boom and I shalt never, never forgive you! ...             ...ever! ...Well, okay, a diva needs a bit of coaching to properly portray a role, but I'm sure you'll get to that once we can set up a...

   *cough*  Well, okay. Perhaps I could be a bit more... "cleanly" about things around here, but I surmise we can chalk that up to male influences and my Pinkie Pie body. 

   Hmm... what else was I going to... Oh! Right!

  Turns out Idahoan Bronies actually are a thing! They just attended the showing after mine! Chickened out as I was leaving whilst they were coming in with their coordinated T-shirts, then came back in under the premise of revisiting the water fountain and sidelined some chap that had lagged behind. Turns out they've been this "FaceBook" thing I've been avoiding & dreading. So, scuttled out of there immediately after that question with a very "Hyperventilating-Fluttershy-Cackle." Hey! I socialized! That was a marked improvement!!

  So, anyhow. Help there. Any patient being want to walk me through what, where and how to use a Facebook? Sounds terrifying... and mainstream. 

Well! Movie going down tomorrow! REal excited! Just about the biggest event that's happened to me this year! 

   If I haven't been or am going to be, a bit behind on responding to things here then that's probably due to all my excitement for that and everything! 

  I... I just hope this turns out okay. I didn't really... like, find any sort of meetup thing online or... or however this is supposed to work, but... means a lot to me... guess the point is to just go there and have what fun I can get ahold of! 

  Wubba-lubba-dub-dub! Am I right?!

HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

 JUST SAW THE NEW MAUD EPISODE! EEEEEEEEEE!

 BREATHE MAN! BREATHE! HE'S GOING INTO SHOCK FROM MAUD OVERDOSE!

 GEEEHEEHEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

 SHE'S LIVING IN PONYVILLE-ADJACENT NOW! IN A SUPER COOL CAVERN! SHE PLAYS ELECTRIC GUITAR AND DOES STANDUP! I ALWAYS KNEW SHE WAS A ROCKSTAR! AND! SHE LOOKS SUPER CUTE IN HAIR CURLERS! NNNNYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!...

  Aand now he's flatlined.  *throws defibralators over his shoulder, which immediately explode*

   Hmm, what else was he going to say? Oh yeah, Pinkie Pie was textbook Yandere this episode and Limestone was there too. Total "I've been living for years with Pinkie screaming in my ear, and you want to ask why I'm grumpy?" Face. 

  Best episode ever. As if a Maud episode could ever be anything but complete 220%. 

  Have you watched To Where & Back yet? The last two-parter thing? Systematically destroyed Chrysalis's personality to nothing more than random growling villainry if you ask me. Pretty much got knocked down from a CareBear Stare.  ...Again.

     ...Oh, and i'll get around to the PM soon, been busy today.

   Blech. Blech. Just watched the big "Unlikely Heros & huge cultural change for an entire species in the show" episode. Hated it. Just hated it. 

...*twitch*

  HOOOOOOOO! BOOOOY! HEY EVERYPONY! GUESS WHAT EPISODE I JUST WATCHED?!!?

  Oh, you know that two-part season end episode where we were promised Discord goin' on an adventure with other second tier characters? Where we'd pretty much get the final confrontation with Chrysalis and have a huge cultural upset in an entire species' way of life?!!?

 YES! I AM JUST A BIT INCREDIBLY MIFFED AT THIS! 

   THIS JUST SYSTEMATICALLY MUR- ....  hnnh... know what. Must blog now. 

Perhaps going over Top Bolt first will cool me down for a bit.

 Do adore how SCP-682 & SCP-999 are friend-shipped together! One is a massive, hate-fueled, rage lizard formed around all of the hatred in humanity... and the other is an unmitigated embodiment of joy and kindness! The Rage Monster & the Tickle Monster!

  Gosh! Wonder why we would ever be so interested in such a creepily wide range of emotion! We've never shown such an inclination of that before!

  Or it's yet another blatant ploy from attention from a sick & diseased mind.

  Yay! Self-Expression! That deserves a tickle fight!

  If  you so much as touch me I will F****** end your pitiful excuse for an exist-...

I have found the single most disturbing & terrifying SCP. Well... for me anyway. No blood, no gore, not much in the way of monsters... just... just....   MALLS...

 Warning though, fairly long, but its a good story to run in the back ground if your doing something else.

  And yeah. That pretty much is the same sort of story as settling in the frontier. I just can't think of anything scarier then being lost forever with no way of hoping if you'll ever make it back to your own familiar life & world...

 I really oughta try seeing what this whole Darkstalkers thing is.

 I'm not really into fighting games or know much about anything other than gameboy games, but I recently watched BennettheSage's review of the movie they put out. 

  ...and no, my interest doesn't exist solely because Bennett pointed out that Morrigan was supposed to be a hot scottish lady with a penchant for absolutely horrible & unneeded puns! 

  Felicia I could care more about. Less a person-that-happens-to-be-a-kitty and more of just skimpy lady to help advertise the game. And I could swear King Pyron actually got a yugioh card made of him, but... I digress. What really caught my attention...

  Was Jon Talbain here.

  Fwuffy!~*

   I've made point of- FWUFFYHEHEEE~! -*ahem*, stating that I like werewolves because they're cool and everything, but I...    one moment...

 Okay, sorry. Had to scroll up. It was getting to me.

  But the moment he came on screen, and whenever any image of him is fully visible to me, I just get an overpowering urge to audibly mumble out something like "Fwuffy Puppy fwuffy!!" I have a sickness. And the only cure is more fluff. I swear, its like pretty much anything fluffy is like catnip to me!

  Like, yeah, I know. He kind of frankly looks like somebody's edgy OC. He could easily rip me to bloody tatters and not actually be as gentlemanly as I think he's portrayed in the game, were he real, but I can't help it. The part of me that adores doggies vastly overpowers the capability to see any potential harm or threat in any canid depiction. I still hold firm to my theory that If I ever met an actual werewolf, I'd be stuck in cutsey baby talk even while its currently gnawing on my neck.

  I remember one time in Warcraft, there was some werewolf boss that came stalking into the arena like a boss while on a carriage posing, then when he finished arriving, he suplexed the entire carriage into the nearest wall. With horse attached. He also said something along the lines of: "I have a not so secret secret..." It's that i'm a werewolf! And I'm just sittin' there fawnin' like a schoolgirl. Think he got a full twenty seconds of combat on me before I snapped out of it.                                   But I digress!

  My point is! Were any of you somehow squicked out by my Bestiali-*cough* being a Furry, do rest assured that its almost entirely dominated by my urge to "pewt da Fwuffy Puppeh!!"

  "It has a two and a half foot snout filled with fangs as long as my forearm."

     "But iwts just swo fwuffies!!!"

Kinda still enchanted by the idea of Tonimancy. Pretty much the superpower of sound manipulation.

  Sound alone is something most take for granted. There has been Air Cannons that can knock a plane out of the sky, reverberations that can make water or even rock & steel dance to its own rhythm, or even how even the proper tone, whether or not its even audible can severely effect one's mental status or even their biological functions! (To whit: the infamous Brown Note.[just GUESS why its called that.]) 

  Yet it's always an ignored element. I suppose "hardened air" like things like air slashes that you often see with air magic might count, but I want to know if it has ever been touched on before. Makes me wish I knew enough about it to research that on these here internets. ...and yes, Tonimancy is a word I made up for it...

Ugh, really should have attempted this much earlier in the day. Suppose I can blame my procrastination on that.

  The Fandango websites not working for me and too slow, but I'll be blown to bits If I let that stop me. Still, have to get those Pony MOvie tickets early, so I tried calling the theater... that is only automated. After the fourth try of stumbling through the vague instructions and apparently calling India the first time due to a few too many numbers, I got ahold of an actual person! ...who promptly told me it was either the too-slow website or show up in person. So, going to take a hour long trip into town to waste a quarter tank of gas and drive back home in the dark just so I can preorder my tickets right now.

  If you don't hear from me again in... three hours at most, assume I've crashed my car.

   Hey, I for one am used to my constant befuddlement.

G-... Got my pre-order ticket for the big Movie going through Fandango right now!

 Im kind of... quite nervious. Never, like, preordered before. What do I do when I get there?! 

  There going to be enough other people there that'll mean that somebody might want to talk? I'll have a chance to make a f-friend, r-right? How does socialization work?!!? Have to show interest, but not too much interest to where I might sound creepy or something and they whap me one. I can ask if they're into the sh-show too, right? Ch-chances are pretty high I oughta be able to see those in similiar situations, adult fans of the show. 

 I-I-I've g-got, l-like, four days till opening night! M-maybe I oughta try, like, w-watching the show for once before I do to get my interest up or something. G-get in the mood for it, psyche myself up. 

  Ch-chances are, p-probably, that its not going to be some big life changing moment like I've been convincing myself and I just watch it & go home. ... th-though that'd be pretty sad too...

QUESTION!!!                                               *eyes bobble around like glue-on googly eyes*

   So, another fanficky Idea I'm working on!  (don't know where it would go as a thread. And no, still haven't touched the first fanfic Idea I had mentioned...)

  So! How to be 100% Oblivious!

 Point is, my main character is themed from the point where he's just somehow not noticed popular culture or news for the past decade to the point where he's not noticed a whole slew of new species now being harmlessly integrated into the human populace.

  I can assuage the small stuff. That when he's outside in the rare times, he's just too wrapped up in his thoughts or his phone to notice that somebody walking past has a few more limbs than usual. What the Big hole in my scheme is... how you manage to support yourself & shoddy little house, with a job that doesn't require you having direct visual contact with the outside world. 

   I can see buying your groceries and not noticing there's three times as much mass under the counter of the lady ringing you out... but you'd probably notice your boss having a pair of wings...

Darn. Hope I haven't been too transparent with what the franchise I'm riding on is.

For @SolarFlare13, who asked, and to whom else may wish a better understanding of myself as much as I do for both myself, and hopefully themselves:

   From Forgiving our Parents, Forgiving Ourselves- by Dr. David Stoop:

What happens to a person when the safe fortress is always under repair during those early years? When he or she runs for shelter and safety only to find that one of the walls that is supposed to provide safety isn't there? What is supposed to feel safe doesn't feel safe. Perhaps Mom is sick alot; so she may be there, but she's not there emotionally. Or mom and dad are always fighting and talking of divorce. Children in these situations often seek reassurance that everything is going to be okay. They become clingy and need more emotional support than they can get.

   Fear of abandonment is a major theme in their relationships. As adults, those with an anxious attachment style often seek to become one with their close friends, and especially with a spouse. If they could just be "joined at the hip" they believe they would finally feel secure-a spouse or a close friend will never leave. But at the same time, they struggle with feeling flawed deep down inside and unworthy of being loved. In their anxiety about being abandoned, they do what you would least expect- they are critical of the other person to the point they almost drive that person away. But then, if they drive them away, they really weren't abandoned.

   Those who are in a relationship with the anxious attachment person  often experience him or her as unpredictable- sometimes wanting almost a symbiotic closeness and then, without warning, being critical and pulling away.

   ...

    As adults, those with an anxious attachment style appear to move between desperately wanting connection and backing away from it. They use criticism as a way to sabotage the connection they long for and are beginning to experience.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

  Consider that a fitting explanation of those of us that are "Tsundere," "Yandere," or just the usual internet troll who can't seem to react any other way other then sarcasm or spitting venom. Or, perhaps, to put in context of the show, hated characters like Gilda or Chrysalis. If hatred is what you were grown in... hatred shall be the fruit you grow. It's up to you which way your branches spread...

  OmG! I couldn't even tell that WAS Taylor Swift first time I heard that! Woof! Girl's getting dark so fast! You have no idea how much I relate to that! It's all like: "Well, I really only wanted to sing. You all made me popular, said I oughta be some pop star or something, then you blast me with tabloids and rumors like it effects your lives?"

   Gasp! You! Guysss!

  Stop making that stupid, surprised face. It's so annoying. 

 You can't possibly be that surprised. What's with that **tch?

 Y'all!              Oh, stop acting like your so nice, you are SO FAKE.    *cries*

Ah, what are you doing.            Gettin' RE-CEITS! Gon' edit this LATAR!

I would very much like to be removed from this narrative. 

Well, how about something a bit more creative and positive today? I'll tell you of my recent dreams!

  ..Hey! Get back here, I ain't givin' you a choice in this matter! Sit down an' read already!

   Kinda weird, been having a running theme of being rather canid this week.

 On the twenty-fourth of... wugh...last month? I've been having only one dream a month...? Bweh...

   I dreamt that I was being raised alongside coyote pups out in the dry scrubland. After a few attempts I had managed to snatch a roadrunner out of the air. (yeah, I know they're usually flightless, dreams, bruh!) In awe of the rarity of the occasion and the fragility of the small bird, I decided to let it go.

  A much more detailed dream, however, happened last night. This one feels loads more obvious in its symbolism.

    I had dreamed that I was running a family business out of a three story, ancient Japanese metal tower. Something very much like the Tin Tower from Pokemon. (being really the only experience I have with such architecture.) The first floor was our family run Oriental restaurant with my cute, mousy wife. For some reason, I had felt compelled to ascend the stages of our tower home; most likely because I had wanted to ring the even older, ornate metal, inscribed, ceremonial bells on top in celebration of my wife having given me the news that she was once more with child! (...*cough* With triplets... after already having two older children. Total five. Usually more children then I say I have. Heh... okay, so maybe I am a bit enamored with having a large family.  )

   The second floor was one long, ring-like, hallway of a room bordering the outside of that floor. It was mostly taken up by my retired father and his tool collection. By this point in my journey upwards, I had turned into a fox. The name Reynard strikes me as familiar, as does most of my dream environ, as if it had been a book I once read.

  The center of that room gave way into what the third floor was. One huge, dilapidated & ran-down thrift & antique store. Age having long since reduced most of the shelves and goods into falling into each other into mostly loose piles. Most of it I had to climb over and around. (probably why I turned into a fox, for the agility.) Nonetheless, most of the goods seemed familiar, like a store I had once visited before. On the third floor I had located the black metal fenced-in shafts that led to the two ancient ceremonial bells above. Using my small, adept fox claws I climbed my way up top to the eastern bell.

  I awoke upon reaching the ancient bell. 

Been watching Gumball too, recently. Tina's adorable. I'd so date her!

... oh, you know, the giant, realistic tyrannosaurus? I toootally called her personality too, despite I've been jumping around in the episodes. Total mayadere! She's the school bully but only because she's treated like the monster she looks like! Hers is a dark and troubled life fraught with pathos! 

 Can just imagine her stomping right over my head as I gasp with a "She's gourd-eous!"

... aye, plant pun. Ya see, I'm a sentient potted bush with widdle arms & legs in the Gumball universe. My character trait would be appearing out of no where to make dramatic gasping noises with my widdle hands raised to either side of my face. Where my cheeks would be if plants had cheeks. And yes, I can gasp. Leaf lungs.

  We'd be a perfect odd couple! After all, who's safer from a mega carnivore than a potted plant? I see no fault in my logic here.

          ...what I don't see, is a visual aid of a cartoon potted bush. Apparently I can't google image search any cute cartoon plants without a third the results being graphic... acts. Pfft, never had this issue with searching tentacles. Still, least the internet's fan art sees Tina as the big softie she is!

It's really bothering me and I have no idea what the term for it is.

  I had plans today! A good amount of things to do, get done or stuff to write up on these here forums, but I just flitted to another thing to maybe do, found myself vegging out in front of the YouTubes and just aimlessly wandering around the house.

  Its... like some mental muscle has atrophied. My attention span? My capacity to build my own structure to adhere to? Am I procrastinating? 

  I wanted to go to the library today. Do some research and work on some projects. But... I just gave up. Took the easier route and just dealt with what little I had. Bothers me. 

 It's not so much depression, I would say. Just... can't... be intentional. I used to not be like this.

 I used to pursue things I liked, like make time for reading or other things I do enjoy.

   What... what happened... where am I?... who am I? I'm so confused... lost. And thinking about it hurts. 

                      ...Inaction hurts. How Unreal.

I cannot even begin with Adventure Time.

  Watching some youtuber try to pry some lore or investment in it and all I can see is momentary "wouldn't this be a cool thing for these episodes?!"  All I can see is any information given what so ever is just rendered moot noise by two or three episodes later. Any callbacks just strike me more as an empty "Hey, remember that!" Like, what's the point in just enjoying the spectacle of the moment?  ...

  Ah shoot, went all hypocritical again.

Don't know why but breathing felt really good today. The intake of the surrounding element made me so glad I could merely breathe. 

  Even eating or drinking just plain old tap water is something to be appreciative of! My tummy makes funny sloshy noises when I drink water!

  That's one positive of depression, is that it sometimes leaves you so enamored of what you can do. That your body is a factory of chemical reactions, a bag of organs all sloshing around and it works like the fine-tuned machine that it does! Life is a beautiful, wondrous thing!

                                 ...maybe I've died again. That tends to happen to me so often I lose track.

Hoo boy. Here we are again.

  I set a "Go-To-Bed" alarm at nine, and somehow, always, I don't notice and start doing that till two in the morning.

  Then there's what little I do do as recreation. Stuff like Hearthstone, where it becomes so very obvious how every attempt I make at competition is doomed by, like, turn four, because eeeeverybody else seems to work much better with the most basic stuff.

   Or the other game that pins me to random restrictions or bad luck where I can't win no matter what I do so I can get that brief moment of feeling like I've accomplished something meaningful. But, no.

  I could go job searching. But there's no written rules for that. Don't want to disappoint my superiors. Not again.

   It's almost eerie, really. Like literally everything I come in contact with, be it projects or trying to keep a pet alive for more then a couple years without some hideous growth blossoming out of control on them... it's like I ruin everything I touch. That I'm doomed to forever watch everything wither & die.

      ...but... you can't ruin creative pursuits. One can never be wrong in the creation of a witty scenario for a story, or in providing a suitable character with which to have your audience sympathize. I want back that joy I had as my younger bookworm self. Where I could feel what the author felt, trust in them as they led me to the worlds they had envisioned. 

   I cannot live for myself, I live but by proxy for another. I am merely a supporting character.

                         Sigh... it's very late. I do digress.

 Been contemplating my kind. You know, Eldritch Horrors.

    Kind of want to start up some sort of tentaclefull of comic strips or something about "How to Hang with an Eldritch Horror." Need a bit of recognition for us shapeless masses of unimaginable terror, ya know?

  Know what'd be my pick up line? "Hey baby, you must be an Eldritch horror.... Because I find you maddening."

 There's just something comforting & innocent in what is scary by nature, but perhaps not of its own intent. Lovecraft was certainly a product of his life & times.