Widdershins

Was thinking just now. RD & Flutters are pretty much opposite ends of the personality spectrum. Yet both are by & far the most talked about in the fandom. (aside from Pinkie being pretty much the face of the merchandise. You know, pink n' all.)

   Think that's a good rule of thumb. If you want to attract others for whatever reason, even be it just for friendship, you have to play up your personality. Be up front about it. Like the ol' hackneyed phrase goes "Be yourself." But that's not quite far enough. You don't have to apologize for being yourself, right? Sure, any personality can rub others the wrong way but you could wipe you're guyses memories & replay the same instance another hundred times and you'd still respond the same way. Be assertive, even if you're a doormat. Dash is a showboater & Fluttershy will recoil & slowly back away during every first encounter... they let you know from the start what hand they have to play... if you're interested in that, they leave it up to you to pursue. 

   Uhm... th-that's why I bring that up... this whole... jokey-joke, clever witted, pink-texted... sorta out-there-guy isn't really me... As I say in my About Me, I really am a Flutterguy. And that's not overblown for attention. I rather hate Fluttershy's archetype... and thereby mine. 

 I mean... s-sure, I'm a good humored fellow, but... if we was to actually meet face to face, I'd almost instantly cower & force you to lead the conversation. Its why I relate so well to Fluttershy, because despite evidence to the contrary, I'm a huge coward. I've been through every submissive posture, movement, or tone she has. ...Though I'm not sure about that Fainting Goat position...

 Uhm... M-my point is... I don't want it to come across like I'm some loud, unstable weirdo... I mean... like, that is my sense of humor obviously, but...

  Sigh... there's at least two incidents with others on these forums where I think I came off too strong, left a bad impression and now I'm too scared to check back if they're alright...  ...or have forgiven me...

 Tonight's Random Thoughts

 So, character development is a big thing with me.

  Kind of wonder just how big you can go with a character? Take that as a challenge! No magical interference or abilities, just their natural state of being! I'm thinking of a sort of Mountain Crab!

  Just one day, two huge pinchers slowly unravel out from under Canterlot Mountain and a comparatively small set of legs after it set off to scuttle across Equestria with the entire capitol on top of it.

    Luna: Do you think we should... try to talk it into putting us down?...

    Celestia: You really think that's a good idea at this point?

   Alternatively, kind of obsessed with having a character roll into a ball or elsewhile solid shape. Be it specially designed armor or a large armadillo. Maybe I'm a defense-centric fellow or I just really like Electrode, I just love the idea of an ability to literally clam up!

 So, a short, bloggy story for you all.

  I guess hanging out with the poor examples of humanity that count for my parents (why yes, I do have my acerbic moments.) doesn't have to be all bad.

  My father never got too much into reading. Sure, he can read the newspaper just find and picks up books for recreation, but its always been a running gag of mockery as long as I've known him that he fuddles things up when it comes to that. Do think that he only learned to read late in life when things were too poor to afford such a skill, so much so that I don't think he would ever willingly read in front of anybody else.

  Ironically enough, think my father's distaste for reading lead directly to my love of it.

  I used to read my father to sleep often. (and yes, gives you a little insight into my odd family dynamics there.) My mother never had the time or patience to do so, nor could my father ever keep up with my own reading skills, and... what with the massive age gap, my folks couldn't stay up much late themselves anyhow. So, in my bibliophilic enthusiasm, I would pick up where my own father had to stop. Say what else I may about the negatives of my childhood, but it does do some wonder to see another be soothed & relaxed by your own efforts.

  Today... I had managed to pick up a small copy of the childrens' book Ferdinand, the Bull. We were waiting on my mother to get out of the store, (as usual, *mumble grumble*) so I handed him the little chip of my childhood nostalgia. His first impressions were of dismissive concern, that it was just a childrens' book meant to be simple tripe (... okay, maybe not the best word to dredge up considering the titular character...) and clearly, the unspoken concern for not being good at the whole reading thing. While he still skipped around words in his mumbling, even turning pages two at a time It still did my heart good. He lit up at the artfully crafted pictures, chuckled at clever wordplay that he didn't have to stare at & register first. Probably for the first time in a while it didn't seem like he was making others wait while he caught on to something others already knew.

    I felt proud. Watching somebody else enjoy something I had for the first time. Letting them feel their own way around. It's like watching your child ride their bike for the first time, and becoming aware of their own capabilities.

    ...

      ....Kinda a messued-up dynamic when ya think of it, but...still!

Well, from as far as I can tell, the commerical freak-out seems to be over... so good on there.

   ...I keep getting mentioned in some Boop thread.

  S-... Seriously, this is getting to me now. In a veritable Twilight Sparkle snit-fit. What is Boop?

   I might just be too level from being grumpy or down, but really. I do sincerely mean it. My eye is starting to twitch when I think about the question. Is it some sort of physical movement or salutation meant to illicit a response? Is there a societal expectation as to what the proper response towards pressure on one's nasal cavities is? Is it not unhygienic? If indeed perceived as merely silliness, then why bother doing something if you have no prior plan as towards the result of such actions?  Should I... thank you for booping? Or is it just route behavior like a sneeze where there is a predetermined chant expected of one to experience just such a biological involuntary response? Is it supposed to be cute somehow? What difference is there between me just walking up to a stranger on the street & pressing my open palm into their cheek? Sure such as that example would illicit an untowards reaction or erstwhile negative response perhaps even so to the point of being considered rude, so why would something very much akin be treated in so very different a light in a different medium which can only be considered as suitable allegory towards real life if............

   I must admit, there are times myself I entertain the idea, but I picture it as a means to punctuate a sentence & drive across importance to the subject, if not dismiss it entirely in a manner to express a certain willingness to engage in supposedly "harmless" social interaction.

  ...Don't... don't boop me. I'm serious. I want to know what a boop is. 

No energy... down... really down today...

 Sigh... really down today. And there's only one cure.

      ... I wanna see Rainbow Dash in a Sarashi.

  Something like this, ya know?

  It's just total kickass, you know? Especially with the tattered delinquent coat! It just screams "Yeah, I don't need me no armor! Go ahead! Throw a punch! Toss a brick! See what it gets ya, chump change!"

                                   ...Nyo... I don't see how sex appeal has anything to do with this. It's just super-cool!

                                                             I... I just need somethin' tough to toughen me up, ya know?...*sniffle*... think I need ta go cuddle my Dash plushie again...

Gooood Nnnneeeeews, everybeing!

AFter a week of frustration & fatigue and about two days of irritation & being grumpy, I get a surprise today!

  My Mother, the one person in this world I hate the most & want to spend the least time with & serves as a symbol for all my hatred, fear and depression, has decided to show up unannounced on my doorstep!

  I am seriously fighting off the urge to literally chew both my arms off! God, help me! Literally!

(still suffering forum problems, but let's see if I can't get this shtick out... been meaning too. Love this new anime that's come out.)

  And then, from the back of the crowd of curious students, a voice bellows out from a betentacled fellow.

  "CAN I PET YOU?!!?"

  From the two elemental friends by his side, a blue one smacks him upside the head in a friendly cuff.

  @Duality: No, no you can't Wid. I don't know why you thought you could ask that.

    "I got excited..."

   @The_Gobo "EH, Let him try. I want to see how this winds up."

   "Don't encourage him. This place is weird enough as it is."

My computor is falling apart... and with it my sanity & will to live... help... please...help me...

  I tried to get something to get rid of Amazon Assistant and it only made it more detirmined... I can rarely see my screen or operate the forums still... Oh god... this hurts so much... please... make it stop... please

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu....

   Well, hi-de-ho, everybody! Looks like I'm not allowed to be on these forums anymore! 

   Seems the site has gotten a new ad! The same loop of sound every blasted single time, which I can't shut off or exit out of, and on top of that it refuses to allow me to scroll up and away from it so the only way I can see what I'm typing is because I can keep typing! I even turned adds off and yet it still insists on playing them! I guess, now that I"m no longe rallowed to be on these forums for longe rthen twenty seconds at a time! Guess this is it folks! Goodbye! The forums are literally rejecting me like a bad organ transplant!

  If it weren't for that and the weird, creepy white box that is permanantly up on my computor that I don't know how to fix! Guess my computor's just too broken n' stupid to work now!

Good Morning!  Have an Earworm!

  Aah, Nostalgia! Sometimes the american butchering of the theme song only fits it better! Sometimes 4Kidz caught on to what they did well!

Whelp. Past two in the Morning and my face has turned into a tomato.

 Not the whole head, just the front.

   Hallucinations. The only reliable way I know when I'm tired.

                                MWAH! Goooodnight, Everyboopie!

Huh! Well, what do you know! An anime set in a world were everyone is a cute monster person! Even fat, dumpy, weird guys are cute catpeople!

 It's amazingly pretty respectful... to species we technically have no preconceptions of. Down to horses having an in-proportionate fear of snakes, or the clever & surprising way of pretty much doing a reverse naga.

  That... that Snakegirl is just mesmerizing. She's some transfer student in a new country where pretty much all the natives have been taught her kind are mindless predators when the truth is they're pretty much just trying to survive in one of the harshest climates on the planet. She's just so demure, kind, calm, understanding, sweet and with the deepest pathos & understanding. What's the word I'm looking for here? Nadeshiko? The anime trope term for essentially the Japanese "Perfect Wife?" The sort to bring you a bowl of hot soup if your sick, whether or not she's actually related to you... but still toss you out on the street if you stir up trouble in her household.

   Those are like the bluest eyes I've ever seen... all three of them.

    Alsodon'tgetalarmedbytheinitialpausescreen,youknowhowclickbaitis.

Okay, so frogs are pretty darn cute. I've got, like, twenty stuck to the front of my house right now.

  You try to catch one and they just immediately dump out half their body weight in scared urine. They're squishy and soft not because an amphibian has to stay wet so much as that they're constantly wetting themselves in terror.

  Admittedly though, they're equal parts scary too. Like, ain't no animal can beat a toad for a disapproving, slightly bored grimace. They're cute in that reptilian brain sort of way. Like you fully expect a toad to try swallowing something twice its body length only to stop halfway through because they ran out of mouth space. Then proceed to die because they refuse to give up on a meal halfway through. I can respect that.

  #ToadBro

Was just watching Planet Dolan on the YouTubes and they had one story sent in.

  The theme was crazy ex-girlfriends and one was a story about some guy catching his girl eating a dead rat in his bathroom since she thought she was a wolf.

 What my response would be in that situation?

  "Cool! Want me to throw some spices on that sucker n' panfry him up for ya?"

   I see no line drawn between you killing & eating a rat you found off the street and eating prepackaged ungulate flesh that has been ground up & prepackaged. Admittedly the latter is likely cleaner & healthier, but the former is totally more awesome. You think you're a wolf, no trouble on my part. In fact, that kind of crazy is a little bit attractive to me. Buuut... I mean, if ya got the option, girl, be honest and we'll clean that roadkill for ya first.

    ...and also, long as you don't ever eye me wrong when ya hungry. 

     Ooh! Rat-flavored pancakes! I hope we DO date a crazy person someday!

                  ...I dunno... the sardine pancakes didn't turn out well...

  I truly was in tears during this. I just love how the emphasis here is on making memories & sharing your own special creativity with the world. You know, I don't know if anyelse of you out there ever get that feeling that GameFreak is just one big family like how they portray themselves in their own games. Like, if you went on a tour of their building you'd likely find one or two employees just having a break midday to play pokemon during their regular workday. I've heard alot of rough stuff about how working in Japan is pretty soul-crushing, but its nice to know there's a company out there who still likes to think about the genuine fun & socialization of gaming rather than constant competition like so much out there.

  Also, two other super cute things I noticed about Pokemon Ultra Sun & Moon. Looks like not only can you dance & put cute little ribbons on your partners but you can dress up as them too! What I wouldn't give for a Delphox robe!

    ...the... Delphox ear hair, I can probably do without...

 I really need to get onto managing myself better to where I can have energy again. My walk earlier just seemed to have aggravated my headache. Did manage to save a pretty & big mantis from a driveway though. Poor thing seemed dizzy & lost, they truly are magnificent creatures. Any bug that eats other bugs is okay in my book!

  But I digress.

 My lack of energy is even creeping into my work here on the forums. Here I am already over an hour past my bedtime and I don't think I remembered to eat dinner either... It's hard to keep track of myself.

  I suppose that's why I've been staying for so long on this Ghostrick Socuteboss avatar. I totally relate.

  ..and yes, that is an uber cute name for a demon! 

I... have been meaning to ask about your cover photo. Perhaps its just my crooked mind, but the angle seems a tad suspicious to me somehow. Fan art you've done before, I take it?

Guys. And I'm serious here. I just looked it up the past day or so.

  I'm an Empath!

  I must practice these newfound powers with all due responsibility! I must learn to come into my own as an Esper, because typically those burgeoning powers don't tend to end well...

 ..really am serious too. Note the lack of pink text here.

  Maybe, if I get lucky, I'll find my own Haruhi Suzumiya! 

Just spent three whole hours on Hearthstone attempting to do the new Lich King boss.

  I finally win out, and the way I want to win nonetheless, and what does it tell/give me? A pack of five cards, all worthless repeats and the little teensy factoid... that to get a special reward I need to do it... another EIGHT TIMES! EACH WITH THEIR OWN HANDICAPS!

  All to get a shiny new graphic with a few emotes! That in no way impacts play and covers up an already preexisting hero graphic that I've already worked hard for! For a class I don't even play that much & usually hate!

  From the deeps cockles of my cold, dead, void-charred lump of a heart, I sincerely wish you Hearthstone developers...    that at least three of you lose a notable chunk of flesh out of your body, each at least a fist size portion. One of you at least needs to lose a limb. I don't want you dead, of course. I just want you to suffer.

  And yes. It does take alot for me to wish harm upon another.

  I'm just this grateful that you fed into my addictive personality and made me utterly despise myself for a good portion of my day.

Anybeing else ship their ponysona (essentially you) with a cannonical character, and,in turn, make OCs out of your foals? 

  I dunno why, but I find it hilarious to picture Limestone as a mother. 

So, I was browsing through fanart of the Melodius Diva archetype that's probably my favorite (oy, look... I can like incredibly girly things sometimes too!) of the game, and I dredged this up & started thinking.

  Sure, might be some fun ideas to pose Widdershins in and some good stuff to draw and practice...

    But then I got to #4.

   HHHhuh... What's that other character that had a huge impact on my life that is also known for rather glaringly annoying character flaws? That taught me that being a total emotional wreck can be not only acceptable, but funny & even endearing? That also, just so happens to have long, light-colored hair that extends far beyond her shoulders into long, bunny-like ears?

   SAAAAILOR!   MOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!

Hah! I KNEW I was built to wear skirts! I bet this totally makes me the infamous lost Sailor Earth!

 Somehow, I get the feeling the anime covered that at some point.

  Ooh! Then I'm!  *Drrrrumroll!*     SAILOR SCHIZOPHRENIA! 

   Heh! Fuh! Get on it OC designer! This world needs a picture of a draconequus in a Sailor Moon Cosplay! 

 Ah. The joys of being detachable!

**Oh I feel dizzy~   Oh, so dizzy~ 

           I feel dizzy, and woozey an-... and noticeably QUEER! 

    Oh so dizzy~~ That I hardly... know what is real~~**

      ...Anybody else ever get so bored they play with their uvula?

           ...What? No. The little dangly thing in the back of your throat. Why? What did you think I meant?

   Pretty sure that's the reason we can get a good warble, gargle or match a note to a song... you know what I mean. Think I'm pretty good at that, you know? Have I ever told you, that for a body that spends as much time as I do clamming up n' bein' silent, I really do have a good singing voice. If I could stand to speak in front of others. Well, Sing. My impressions, whatnot else you can do with a voice.

   Well, think we're at that time of night again where I've got to head down for the night.

      Here. One of you take this two-by-four and just hammer me really good over the head until such time as I stop moving. Don't worry about it. If my nocturnal sleep admissionsh... shedual... Timing, is anything to go by, naught but blunt force trauma is going to get THIS draconequus down for th-... the... dark time section of the awakie time..

     *thud*

As I sit here, eating birdseed & watching the representation of a kaiju baby dragon just contextlessly sprinting before heading to the land of friendly white boxes, I think to myself.

  What is life?

                Why sane?