Props Valroa

Even though it's not your birthday just yet, as we share the same time-zone, I'll wish you a happy birthday now so I don't accidentally forget later on.

You have been a magnificent  friend to me since we met in June 2019. We had our moments where weren't friends for a long time, but the here and now is what matters. 

It is especially important as the world and our country is tearing itself apart day by day, whereas the only thing you can fall back on is the friends you have and what you can do in the moment.

The red and the orange are the ones that started it all, and they will end it all once they conflict. 

No matter what we have to keep moving forward. No matter how hard or times must seem, we will get through it and become stronger. You think a moment is the end of the world, but it's nothing and you look back on it years down the line and think about how stupid you were, you learn, and you let go eventually even if it will take a whole life time to do so. I can officially say, 1 full year has passed since those times in my life and that I am better off without them. I am better now, I have moved on, those people are nothing to me any more. One of them and I talked about the possibility of us not being friends in the future. He said "Our time will come eventually, it is nothing to be sad about", even though he turned into a toxic ass-hole, he was right.

I was the one to leave. I was the one to let me wings fly and do what I truly wanted within my heart. If you have any of these people in your life, free yourself. If you have people in your life that struggle with it, help in freeing them as we are all free to control our own destiny even if the world makes it seem like it isn't. Everyone has a unique story and path in life.

Ah yes, October 7th...a very special date. One year ago, I rid my life of the pitiful people who held me down. They berated me for my opinions and ignored me in conversations. It was the last I saw of those people. I left without a word (although I relayed a parting message to them through a friend a month later, those people didn't care at all about me). Whats good is that my friend that still talked to them occasionally said that those people never ever talked of me ever again.

I learned a very important lesson on that date, to never let people like that hold me down. As I am free to make my own decisions and choose who my friends are, regardless of whether or not a certain group of people approve of it or not. It was the day that I freed myself of the remained of my bad past. One year free, if anything good can come of 2020, it is my own freedom. 

It feels great to remove Microsoft Brave and other default programs from my computer.

Fascinating stuff. 

This just, is really interesting to me.

I love upping my post and brohoof count. Not ashamed of it. 

I always liked that picture of Sunset, now it is my profile picture. 

My house's furnace is getting cleaned tomorrow and I am getting my senior photo done.

First rain in what feels like a month here. It is relaxing to hear the pitter patter of the rain.

I remember you. We used to roleplay back in like 2016 and 2017.

I always wanted to meet this user.

Didn't realize it was your birthday then, hope you had a good one!

Happy birthday to my old friend Leere. We may have parted ways long ago, but I still wish you well.

Through good deeds, he who secures his reign. 

My real interest is wondering about other people's lives. I know what my life experiences have made me into, down to the wire even if I can't describe it. I really wonder how other people's shape their outlook, ideologies, etc and how THEY imagine other people's lives to be. Take that a step further and I wonder how other people's experiences shape their thoughts and how those thoughts differ between different groups of people.

My life, is all my experiences contained within my skull. It's something that can only be expressed in words as I have no other way of expressing it really. I wish that I could keep down my memories into a massive file folder or something all organized between certain areas and time periods within my life. I have dreams that would blow the world away, but I have no way of expressing it other than through words. I've become so articulated over my wording in the past year or so, that will only grow as I understand my own thoughts more and more.

I always get vibes about people, that forms a 'character' of what I imagine that person to be. The more I know someone, the more I am able to predict their actions and their responses to certain ideas and concepts. Seeing random people in the halls at school, girls I like, I always wonder about what they would think of my ideas, outlook, ideology, and what is different, what is similar, etc? How did their experiences shape them, and how did mine shape mine, and how does that interact with each other?

Conscious beings really are a blessing, we can think about this stuff until eternity's end but we'll never fully understand. Yet theres a part of me that does in a weird way. Its hard to express into words but I'd like you all to imagine a ball rolling and hitting pins, like bowling. Those pins were GOING to hit the certain way because of the way the ball was thrown, once the ball is thrown, the destiny of how they all fall is written. But the way you throw it isn't set in stone, once it's path is, it is set is stone unless something else happens.

Experiences, emotions, ideologies, subconscious thoughts blend together to remove free will till the point it is all on autopilot drawing blanks from what you have already drawn that weren't blank. This is all fascinating to me. 

All the time came and went. All of our lives which could have been. Disaster on the horizon yet we forge on still. You look back on the past and think of it more fondly, even if it was worse times. The past is the escape of the future's end, although there is always something better on the horizon, hopefully.

I've looked, and seen so much, but that's all but a drop in the reality that is perception. Sometimes I wonder why I perceive things in a certain way, am I unique? Every person is, but has someone else felt what I felt before? What are my emotions to other people, how are they different or similar? I'll never know.

I still remember you!

Re-uploaded some old characters from 2017.

Happy birthday, my friend!

You learn things that happened weeks ago, and it changes your perspective. I had a friend who could have died, an irl friend. But I am glad she is here with me today. Never take life or the people you care about for granted. You can spend weeks, months, years building a relationship but it all it takes is a single moment and it's nothing but a memory. 

I think that my new favorite planet is Venus. Or at least close to it. I'll show you all a few photos why.





I find Venus's atmosphere very fascinating. A day on Venus lasts longer than it's year. Venus takes 243 days to rotate, but takes 225 days to do a complete orbit around the sun.

I am no longer in college physics, dropped that shit! It was a piece of shit class with an ass hole of a teacher, filled with popular kids. Thank god I am no longer in it. 

Almost cry every time.