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Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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Everything posted by Stone Cold Steve Jobs

  1. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    It was either Sausage Party (knocked me out faster than dramamine does) or Blazing Saddles (which didn't do that)
  2. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    I never finished Donkey Kong 64. Came close but my save went dead. Also never finished a pokemon game, Grand Theft Auto 3 and San Andreas or that old bugs bunny game for the game boy color where there were all those castles and tweety kept trying to kill you or something. Crap, what game was that?
  3. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    I like a lot of games. Favorite console is the Nintendo 64. Have a lot of good memories on it.
  4. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    Heights, a man who suffers from gigantism trapped with me in a dark room while a bomb slowly and inevitably ticks away, and also spiders.
  5. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    Pepto Bysmal. Feels like a group of trolls doing a clog dance in my stomach.
  6. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    And some say I am easily amused.
  7. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    Albert Wesker. Obviously. Look at how full of cheer that guy is. And sunglasses.
  8. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    Wait a few trillion years for the Sun to go through its life stages and become a black dwarf. It'll be pretty dark then.
  9. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    Saying "Do I smell popcorn" after you fart, so everyone takes a deep breath.

  10. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    If this counts it's a reach. Made me laugh though.
  11. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    The magical sound of high pitch ringing that I occasionally mistake for a cell phone. Tinnitus is a cruel misstress.
  12. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    You mean that's not a thing already? Imagine a terror cell from that religion. Poniest extremest cell vows to unleash love on west. I imagine it would be kind of like this: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=W_l_7eX6Sho
  13. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    My buddy is a Satanist. He names his rival Jesus in pokemon and his character Satan so the game could say Satan defeated Jesus. I have many more stories. He is not a very bright fellow.
  14. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    Playing The Forest (making the forest great again)
  15. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    This. Specifically, the third one. God help me.
  16. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    Fun thing to do: follow a family around disney world for the day, just be in the background if all their photos.

  17. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    Probably the same as any religion, with a few bad apples ruining the bunch. I once got an email from Jesus Christ asking me to open a credit card.
  18. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    I don't know any bronies, and am curious about you. This was my remedy.
  19. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    The idea of Hillary Clinton being a good president.
  20. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    I love my country without exception, and love my government when it deserves it.
  21. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    I see your photo and raise you this.
  22. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    I just fell down the stairs holding a guitar and accidentally wrote a One Direction song.

    1. Kaneki

      Kaneki

      Are you sure it wasn't that "stitches" song, since you fell down the stairs and needed stitches? xD

    2. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      I use a variety of One Direction albums to keep ants out of my kitchen.

    3. LordSwinton

      LordSwinton

      go clone yourself and start a boyband :P

  23. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    I don't know who that is, but I am going to go ahead and guess that secret service would probably tackle the guy. Or shoot him. Or both. Then another person would leap onto her back- there was a second leaper on the grassy knoll.
  24. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    Unless I was given proper protection I would probably die within a few minutes. But other than that, I did get banished there once. The moon men got sick of me because I kept putting graffiti on everything, so then they sent me to Mars, and I kept drawing dicks on it, then they sent me to Venus, which just sorta turned me back soon as I got there and now I am on Earth again.
  25. Stone Cold Steve Jobs
    Oh, my life is in the crapper. But other than that, no, you know, I'm fine.
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