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Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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Everything posted by Stone Cold Steve Jobs

  1. It was either Sausage Party (knocked me out faster than dramamine does) or Blazing Saddles (which didn't do that)
  2. I never finished Donkey Kong 64. Came close but my save went dead. Also never finished a pokemon game, Grand Theft Auto 3 and San Andreas or that old bugs bunny game for the game boy color where there were all those castles and tweety kept trying to kill you or something. Crap, what game was that?
  3. I like a lot of games. Favorite console is the Nintendo 64. Have a lot of good memories on it.
  4. Heights, a man who suffers from gigantism trapped with me in a dark room while a bomb slowly and inevitably ticks away, and also spiders.
  5. Pepto Bysmal. Feels like a group of trolls doing a clog dance in my stomach.
  6. Albert Wesker. Obviously. Look at how full of cheer that guy is. And sunglasses.
  7. Wait a few trillion years for the Sun to go through its life stages and become a black dwarf. It'll be pretty dark then.
  8. Saying "Do I smell popcorn" after you fart, so everyone takes a deep breath.

  9. The magical sound of high pitch ringing that I occasionally mistake for a cell phone. Tinnitus is a cruel misstress.
  10. You mean that's not a thing already? Imagine a terror cell from that religion. Poniest extremest cell vows to unleash love on west. I imagine it would be kind of like this: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=W_l_7eX6Sho
  11. My buddy is a Satanist. He names his rival Jesus in pokemon and his character Satan so the game could say Satan defeated Jesus. I have many more stories. He is not a very bright fellow.
  12. Playing The Forest (making the forest great again)
  13. Fun thing to do: follow a family around disney world for the day, just be in the background if all their photos.

  14. Probably the same as any religion, with a few bad apples ruining the bunch. I once got an email from Jesus Christ asking me to open a credit card.
  15. I don't know any bronies, and am curious about you. This was my remedy.
  16. The idea of Hillary Clinton being a good president.
  17. I love my country without exception, and love my government when it deserves it.
  18. I just fell down the stairs holding a guitar and accidentally wrote a One Direction song.

    1. Kaneki

      Kaneki

      Are you sure it wasn't that "stitches" song, since you fell down the stairs and needed stitches? xD

    2. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      I use a variety of One Direction albums to keep ants out of my kitchen.

    3. LordSwinton

      LordSwinton

      go clone yourself and start a boyband :P

  19. I don't know who that is, but I am going to go ahead and guess that secret service would probably tackle the guy. Or shoot him. Or both. Then another person would leap onto her back- there was a second leaper on the grassy knoll.
  20. Unless I was given proper protection I would probably die within a few minutes. But other than that, I did get banished there once. The moon men got sick of me because I kept putting graffiti on everything, so then they sent me to Mars, and I kept drawing dicks on it, then they sent me to Venus, which just sorta turned me back soon as I got there and now I am on Earth again.
  21. Oh, my life is in the crapper. But other than that, no, you know, I'm fine.
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