ExplosionMare

My most controversial opinion that is not worth making a joke blog for (Because that's what the newest

ones I've seen look like to me.) is:

 I *really* don't like post-reformation Discord from Friendship is Magic. 

If Rainbow Dash ever met Shadow Trail, who is a Shadowbolt, what will happen? 

Splashee is pregnant IRL!!! 

Hey. Hey. Hey everyone. Hey everyone. I gotta. I gotta say something. 

Have you pet Derpy today?

In what may be my last status update, since my head is more clear i want to further explain what happened. Im grateful i have not been banned yet for my breakdown posting spree, though it may be still to come. I wish to explain further. I will tell you all the full story.

Trigger warning, death, mental illness, near death and general unpleasantness.

....

As some of you know i have struggled with schizophrenia for 8 years and counting now and my health is always getting worse. This includes my physical health which i am not entirely sure of. This cultimated today in what was otherwise an ordinary day. First, i got chills and tunnel vision, followed by weakness, heavy heart beating stiffness and like my body was shutting down. I told myself this would pass but as it escalated i delved further into panic and fear that this is it; this was a near brush with death and i hung on the edge. My mother went thru something like this so i was panicing hard.

This distressed my family who was unsure what to do and could only help me with what they could in their power. But i stayed uneven. For hours i felt like this was it and could only vent my despair and panic in incoherent nonsense.this has happened before but this incident was much worse. As a result i drove into the ground what I've been building for months and possibly my friendships here. This does not excuse my frantic ness but will hopefully provide understanding to you.

I walk into tomorrow uncertain of many things. If my family will keep me around, if i will have a place here, if life will go on the way it has before. I took for granted my mortality and loving friends and in one fell swoop i have possibly destroyed it. It would not be the first time.

So, should this be the last of me, remember pastel heart as she was before this day and embrace that. I will give special shoutouts to people who have helped me numerous.

Dynamo Pad, my loving bf and rock. RockARooster who extended friendship when i was still lonely on the forums. Deerie who showedme new things about myself. Steve for trying to help me however be can. Bastion for being a friend and checking on me regurally to make sure im not a mess. Sparky who was my best wrestling friend forever.

And many more. You know who you are.

Thank you everyone for the memories. Hopefully more to come and if not, thank you again. 

And in the end. The love you take is equel yo the love you make. The Beatles 

-Pastel ♡♡♡

Have you pet Derpy today?

I love foods

Should I change Windy's mane color and the design of her tail? 

Have you pet Derpy today?

Now I feel controversy with the second song. Fnaf.

It shows that puppet is the mother but I thought that puppet was a girl, the daughter of henry. 

Let’s play a game. Gimme a slasher. Any one will do. I’ll tell you what I think of them. 

I woke up at 3 in the afternoon omg

I don’t discuss him much but I deeply love The Entity/New Nightmare Freddy. He’s a good boi and I wish we could’ve seen more of him. Also I want a funko plush of him too. But they don’t make any. 

I need to watch out, not to end on post count 6666. I have a feeling it is a discount for 666. 

I just thought of sentence that I don’t think I can say here but trust me it’s kind of cursed. Who wants to hear it though. I have to give context first though. Because oh boy do you need it. 

I love The Greatest Showman so freaking much

Who wants cookies  ?

Ah my mind. 

I was going to enter to the lgtb topic but I forgot I was banned for laughing. When the screen of "you're not allowed to see this topic" showed up I started laughing. 

My memory is bad. 

Anyway, how is your day today? A good one I presume. 

Damn my jaw hurts

Contemplating watching my first horror movie.

The one that made my mother hate sharks.

Jaws

Play a game with me!

Play a game with me!

Play a game with me!

Play a game with me!