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On nights like this, I just think. About myself, and if I really am anything special, if I am a good friend, questions like that. Questions like this create doubt for myself.
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That is where we come to a difference, I cannot change these aspects that I hate. They are part of who I am. My mind is weird and messed up and I cannot change that, only accept it and live with it, problem is that as I get older, I resent myself for those reasons instead of just liking myself. Makes me wish I could just do away with my life entirely but I know can't do that.
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I can't change my disability either, its stuck that way (thanks derpforce). And i've an anxiety attacks and the like too and sadly mindbleach is not a thing that exists. You just have to work with what you have, even if itdoes look like a mental pile of junk, you might have to work at it more than most, even alot more, but just keep trying and at the very least, keep trying to make friends

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