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Best Pony

Found 3726 results

  1. CloserToTheSun

    Song Titles Game! [Updated rules]

    Not sure if anypony has done this yet, but it's a game I really enjoyed in some past forums. In this game you have to use one word of the previous song title to use in the new song title. While you don't have to, bolding the word from the previous song would be helpful Example: "Back In Black" by AC/DC "Black Sheep" by Metric "Sheep Go To Heaven" by CAKE "Monkey Gone To Heaven" by The Pixies "Gone Away" by The Offspring ....and so on and so forth. UPDATE: No just using the word in part of your response, like such: "Mother" by Danzig "Motherboard" by Daft Punk This does not count However, the following is okay: "Let Forever Be" by The Chemical Brothers "Let's Go Crazy" by Prince And The Revolution Now let's start with the following song: "Welcome To Paradise" by Green Day
  2. What are some of your favorite lines from songs you like, don't like, find okay, or downright only listen for that line. Any genre or song is alright. You can even post entire lyrics if the whole song is that good, no boundaries! Just share great song writing and all that jazz! Personally, I really like these. Meshuggah- Dancers to a Discordant System: We believe - so we're misled. We assume - so we're played. We confide - so we're deceived. We trust - so we're betrayed. Vildhjarta- Traces: The clouds are getting darker, and the nights are cold now. When I am gone, I will be gone! This is irreversible! Naberus- My Favorite Memory: Don't ask me to remember them, Don't tell me who the h*** I am! I've tried my best, don't understand! Won't you listen! That's my top three...so far
  3. Marshmallow

    Rate song, then post another!

    Ok, so this is really simple. Basically, someone posts a song. Then the next person gives it a score out of 10, briefly explains why, then posts another song for the next person to rate and so on. Example: User 1: Friday by Rebecca Black User 2: 10/10 Best song evaaar her voice is da bestest evaaaar!!!!lol Never Gonna Give You Up - Rick Astley User 3: 5/10 meh, not my kind of music. But I do like his hair. A lot. Winter Wrap-up - My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic You get the idea. The rules are that you MUST listen to to the whole song, or at least the first 5-6 minutes if it's longer than that. Whether you like the song or not! It can be anything as long as it's labeled music. Pony music, your favorite song, the song that you and your friend composed last night, a song from your favorite opera, a song you hate, ANYTHING GOES! Also, try to include a Youtube link to the song (or any other kind of link really, as long as we can listen to the song) to make it easier for others to listen to it. Also, try to stay classy and respectful. Not everypony has the same music tastes! ^^ Ok, so I guess I should start. Octopus - Syd Barrett http-~~-//www.youtube.com/watch?v=pL36NuJJLIQ&feature=fvst
  4. Crispy

    Mega Thread Metal Thread

    It's time for a long overdue re-updated OP (as of 9/29/13). Spoiler tag it up if you want to check it out.
  5. heavens-champion

    Music Techno or Hip-Hop: Which is better

    Which music genre is better: Techno or Hip-Hop?
  6. We all have those songs that other people would never guess you'd listen to. Share those songs here! This is one song that I'm sure 95% of people would be surprised that I listen to. Hell, it's honestly one of my favorite songs.
  7. SOULEATERROX

    Music Old or new music?

    Just wondering, what generation of music bronies would listen to?
  8. Okay, I was suggested to create a special thread to publish my non-pony works (for pony-music see here), and finally, I creating it. From Russia with magic of love and sorry for my English All further my non-pony works will be posted here. Music writed in Instrumental\Score genre with elements of epic. All tracks available for free dowload. Usually, more than half of my work is non-pony. === And the first one will be the newest. =============== Also, there are the full playlist of my works: Main, For tributes (including pony), and for other type of works (mainly the requests). === Examples of my relatively popular non-pony works since they were published in SoundCloud: 1. Cross of Dead Man [Instrumental Remake] (2014) - Epic Rock. 2. The Land of the Morning Star (2009) - Rock\Instrumental 3. A Utopia with Teeth (2014) - Orchestral\Epic\Score 4. Dying World (2008) - Rock (There is also an instrumental remake) 5. Quenta - Freedom of Time (2014) - Song orchestration\Request 6. Midnight Dragons (2017) - Orchestral\Electronic\Dance 7. World Reborn (2014) - Orchestral\Epic\Score 8. The First Sunrise (2015) - Orchestral\Epic\Score 9. Space Walk (2015) - Ambient\Score 10. Inner Worlds [Instrumental Remake] (2016) - Rock\Instrumental Thanks for listening and feedbacks
  9. TailsIsNotAlone

    The Lyra Heartstrings Fan Club

    Do you love Lyra? Like her? Know nothing about her? Whatever the case, this is the place to talk about the cutest, mintiest, and best background pony in all of Equestria! Until this month I barely noticed Lyra on the show. But then I looked at some pics, and it was like seeing her for the first time. Then I looked up some pictures, read 'Anthropology,' listened to music about her. Then I voted for her in the Most Attractive Pony poll and now I'm a fan for life. xD (You can vote Lyra too! Help her pull off the biggest upset in forum history! http://mlpforums.com/topic/44455-the-most-attractive-pony-tournament-2013-conference-championships/ ) I don't just like Lyra, I LOVE her. I can't get that unicorn out of my head. I didn't understand background pony nuts or WAIFU fans before, but oh god, I think I've become one. Or both. So here's a topic about her. Tell me what you think about her, what kind of pony you think she is, post cute pictures of her...anything and everything Lyra!
  10. In my opinion, during (what I think is) the right time, Christmas music is a wonderful thing. It feels super nice to listen to, and I like the lyrics and melody to many of the songs. They're so jolly, unlike the normal music that you would hear on the radio for most of the year. When do you start to listen to it? I like to listen to it as soon as November starts. Halloween is over, and (I'm American) Thanksgiving isn't a huge enough holiday to have large priority over Christmas, so why not. Anywhere earlier though I find pretty questionable.
  11. Hi Everypony!! I'm looking for free or affordable music software to muck around with and perhaps make my first FM do you have any recommendations? Any tips or recommendations would be greatly appreciated (Brohoofed)
  12. Ezynell

    Favorite Fan Songs?

    So I've been listening to alot of Pony remix music lately and these are my favorites. You guys got any good ones? This is just Fucking epic: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=inlhwCRS4fQ This is pretty dope: This is amazing: This makes Trixie a badass: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2yHH7vpWGU&list=PLB53E319E969D600E&index=77&feature=plpp_video
  13. Fillydelphia Radio Returns! After almost two years off air, Fillydelphia Radio is returning! We are proud to announce that we are resuming Fillydelphia Radio, and changing the entire structure. We want to provide a fully supported station for people to listen to, as well as try their hand at amateur broadcast. We will be opening positions and timeslots soon. We have our temporary website up, which works on desktop and mobile: https://fillydelphiaradio.net/, as well as our stream. Our Discord is up and running here: https://discord.gg/kFuerWv What do I need to apply as a broadcaster? The very basics to be a successful entrant are A microphone A consistent internet connection (1 MBit upload minimum) A short demo of your show (should be between 10-30 minutes, and be a good example of what your show will feature). If you have no broadcast experience prior, and want to have a go, this is for you. If you do have experience, then you're also welcome to apply. We are willing to provide references and recommendations to potential employers for good team players! What's changed? We're not focusing on being "the #1 radio station in the fandom", but focusing on giving the community another creative outlet. We are also relaunching this station as an opportunity to do more experimental development into online media, supporting other programmers and developers in the community with new tools. All of the code and tools we make will be given back to the community through our GitHub under an MIT license. We are committing to making our station open-source, so anyone can use our tools however they please. We look forward to working with other development groups in the fandom, such as the techs at Poniverse, and at Ponyville FM. We are also planning to branch out further to support a new generation of artists, as well as promote our fandom's older artists in their new professional musical careers, and provide tools and resources to help publish and promote music throughout the fandom, through our partnership with Poniverse. That's great! How can I get involved? Right now, we're focusing on getting things to a running state before we start accepting new staff. This includes a new, working website, getting the radio station software stable, and developing the applications for broadcasters to use. You can stay up to date by hanging in our Discord: https://discord.gg/kFuerWv I want to submit music! You can do this through our friends at Pony.FM! Head to https://pony.fm/, create an account, and upload your music there. Then, head to our Discord, and paste the link to your music in #music. We'll give a listen, and some feedback. Who's running the show? At the moment, that's me, WestJ (aka Set-L). If you want to talk to me privately, fire an email at westj@fillydelphiaradio.net, or hit me up in Discord. We look forward to hearing from you guys! Stay tuned!
  14. I was just listening to some rawstyle music and I thought, what are others minds on this genre of electronic music...so go on and post your opinions and ideas. I'll leave here some links for songs with this genre if you actually never heard about this or don't know how it sounds...
  15. *blows away dust* Whoa, I guess it's been a while since I've done of these... Anyways, hey everypony, Woohoo here with another Musical Manslaughter, because you can't spell 'slaughter' without 'laughter' and these songs are jokes. Now I know it's been a long time since done one of these. It's mostly because I haven't found any songs that really make me angry. Then December arrived... and you know what means? Yep, it's that time of the year. For the most part, I like the holiday season... except for one thing, the music. The incessant overplaying of the same dozen-some songs and like 100 different versions of 'em in almost every public place, which drives me up a wall. While there are a few Christmas songs that I enjoy, there are some that I absolutely despise. For this entry, I'm going to tear into two of my most hated Christmas songs, one classical and one modern. Let's break it down. Let's start off with the classical Christmas song. This is a song that everyone and their great-great-great-great-grandmother knows... and that song is "The Twelve Days of Christmas." This is a random version of 12DOC I picked. Not hatin' on Bing Crosby All my life, I've never really understood this song and why it's so popular. I just don't know why. Alright, enough of my rambling, let's break it down. Since I don't want to waste too much of your time, I'm just gonna type the lyrics from the 12th day. On the twelfth day of Christmas My true love gave to me Twelve drummers drumming Eleven pipers piping Ten lords-a-leaping Nine ladies dancing Eight maids-a-milking Seven swans-a-swimming Six geese-a-laying Five golden rings Four calling birds Three French hens Two turtle doves And a partridge in a pear tree *inhales deeply* Where do I begin? Guess I'll start from day one ... and I will portray myself as a disgruntled boyfriend. 1. A Partridge in a Pear Tree: What the hell is this? All I wanted for Christmas was an iPhone and you give me a bird and a tree that require me to take care of? What's wrong with you?! I starting to question my love for you... 2. Two Turtle Doves: What? Now I have three birds to take of?! What's wrong with you?! You could've gotten me two turtles and I wouldn't complain, but no, you went for the birds again. 3. Three French Hens: At least these birds are edible but now that's six birds, SIX BIRDS I never wanted! That's it, I'm breaking up with you! 4. Four Calling Birds: That's ten birds now!! I need to file a restraining order against you. 5. Five Golden Rings: Wow, a gift that's not aviary related, although I'll probably just sell the rings so I can buy bird food. Maybe you're not so crazy after all... 6. Six Geese a-Laying: AW COME ON! Back to the birds again!?!?! Now I have sixteen birds squawking and shitting all over my house! And they are fucking too? What mental asylum did you break out of? 7. Seven Swans a-Swimming: Twenty... three... birds... and swans are assholes! Enough is ENOUGH! I have had it with these motherfucking birds in my motherfucking house! Seriously, which asylum?! 8. Eight Maids a-Milking: You finally stopped giving me birds, but now you're giving me people?! Also, what are they milking? Did they bring their own cows, too?! So now I have 23 birds, 8 cows (possibly), and 8 people. 9: Nine Ladies Dancing: Wait, where are you getting these people from? Unless... you're a human trafficker! I'm reporting you to the FBI! 10. Ten Lords a-Leaping: You mean like Sith Lords on a trampoline? Have you seen those guys? They don't look like the leaping type... 11. Eleven Pipers Piping: As if the birds squawking wasn't enough, now I have 11 more people playing the most obnoxious instrument in the universe! 12. Twelve Drummers Drumming: STOP THE MADNESS!!!!!1!11!1! ~*~*~*~ *inhales sharply... again* So let's go over all the gifts I've received. One pear tree One trampoline Five gold rings Eight cows (maybe?) Twenty three birds Fifty people ...And most of these things don't even relate to Christmas, especially the birds. Don't they fly south for winter? All I wanted was an iPhone and you give me all this shit. If your true love gives any of these things to you for Christmas, then he/she is an animal hoarding, human trafficking, noise polluting psychopath. My advice, break up with them, report them to the FBI, an have them committed to an insane asylum. As for my thoughts on the song, let me show you in .gif form... For my whole life, I never understood this song. This is not only one of the most nonsensical Christmas songs ever, but one of the most nonsensical songs ever! I know the 12 days represent the days between the birth of Jesus and the arrival of the Three Kings, but what do all those gifts mean? It's even more cryptic than "American Pie," which I already reviewed earlier this year. Whoever wrote this song must have been wasted on a few jugs of moonshine. It's also so damn repetitive. Hearing the same lyrics over and over is so tiring that I'm already bored by day four. Now for the final score... But I'm done yet. I have one more Christmas song to tear into... The final Christmas song I'm tearing into is from the wonderfully non-dystopian year of 1984, and that song is "Last Christmas" by Wham. This will be a doozy for me... let's break it down. Last Christmas, I gave you my heart But the very next day, you gave it away This year, to save me from tears I'll give it to someone special Really? That's how you want to open your song? With that lame-ass chorus. Like I said in a previous MMS, I'm not a fan of songs that start with the chorus. *sigh* Where do I begin with this... You gave me your heart? That's absolutely disgusting! That's almost as bad as all the birds and humans my ex gave me. Why would you give someone a vital organ for Christmas?! Speaking of vital, how the hell are you still alive?! "Stop being so literal, Woohoo. It's a metaphor. They just gave love to their partner for Christmas and they ignored it." Really? Love for Christmas? All I wanted was a damn iPhone! I may be forever alone single but shouldn't give your partner love like... everyday? No wonder they gave it away. That's enough on the chorus, onto the verses... Once bitten and twice shy I keep my distance but you still catch my eye Tell me, baby, do you recognize me? Well, it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me (Merry Christmas!) I wrapped it up and sent it With a note saying, "I love you, " I meant it Now, I know what a fool I've been But if you kissed me now I know you'd fool me again ~ A crowded room, friends with tired eyes I'm hiding from you, and your soul of ice My god, I thought you were someone to rely on Me? I guess I was a shoulder to cry on A face on a lover with a fire in his heart A man under cover but you tore me apart Now, I've found a real love you'll never fool me again You know, a thought just occurred to me. The more I listen to this song, the more I wonder: How is this even a Christmas song? There's nothing really Christmassy about this song other than a few uses of the word "Christmas" and the use of sleigh bells in the beat. To me, this song just feels like a lame breakup pop song you'd hear on the radio pretty much any time of the year. This is my unpopular opinion but I don't really consider "Last Christmas" to be a true Christmas song. It just doesn't have the Christmassy feeling that other Christmas songs have... at least the songs I like. Out of all the Christmas songs I hate, "Last Christmas" was the song I dreaded hearing the most. I can't stand hearing the original version by Wham or any damn version for this song. Even if an artist I liked covered it, I'd still hate it. In fact, there was a year in my life where I didn't want to celebrate Christmas because it would mean I would be hearing this song a bazillion times again. Yeah, those were dark times for me. So, do I still hate this song? Well, what do you think?! Now for the final score. Just a few points lower than "Twelve Days" but still bad. Lol, 69 And that concludes this entry of Musical Manslaughter. If you like these songs, that's fine. Hope you all have a Merry Christmas. Maybe next year, I'll get that iPhone...
  16. Is anyone here in foriegn language songs. Like this one here. If you ask me this is really beautiful and melodious.
  17. TheTaZe

    Music Favorite Artists

    I looked through the threads in the past few months and didn't see something exactly like this. Post your favorite artists here and if you want to, post your favorite songs from them. I personally have a very diverse music taste, I used to be into Dubstep hardcore but nowadays it's mostly Metal and Vaporwave. For my favorite artists now, it would have to be Trivium, Five Finger Death Punch, Killswitch Engage, and Slipknot for Metal. For Vaporwave, it would of course have to be Cat system Corp, waterfront dining, and Vektroid.
  18. What's up, everypony? Woohoo here and welcome back to Musical Manslaughter, because you can't spell slaughter without laughter and these songs are jokes. This entry will be a little different from the last ones. With the previous entries, I tore apart songs from artists that I either dislike or don't care about. For this entry, I'm tearing into a song from an artist I actually like. Normally I talk about the artist after I present the song I'm reviewing, but like I said earlier, this entry will be different. If you can't tell by the font I used in the logo, the artist I'm talking about is Metallica. These guys need no introduction. They're arguably the most successful heavy metal band of all time and also one of the best selling music artists ever. I, myself, am a pretty big fan of the band for about a few years now. However, just because I'm a big fan doesn't mean I support everything the band does, and frankly, Metallica has done a few... questionable things from the mid 1990s to the early 2000s that have disillusioned most of their fans, such as releasing albums with bodily fluids as the front artwork, cutting their hair and dressing up as Cuban pimps, and their lawsuit against Napster. For this entry, I'm talking about one particular song they made, which is the title track of their infamous eighth album... St. Anger... Oh boy, this will be fun... Before I tear this song apart, I just want to tell you that I actually wanted this song to be the first entry of Musical Manslaughter, that is until I heard "Shake it Off" on the radio... Alright, enough of my shuckin' and jivin'... Let's break it down... Believe or not, my first problem with this song is the title. "St. Anger?" Last time I checked, Anger is one of the deadly sins. Putting Saint and Anger together makes it sound like an Oxymoron. How the hell did they come up this? Did they draw random words from out of a hat or did they have help from some Manatees... Great, I'm already losing it and I haven't even started the damn song... Anyways, onto the song. Like with most Metallica songs, this song starts off with a riff. It's not one of their best but it's somewhat tolerable... so long as James doesn't say "this sick riff." So far, it doesn't seem too bad... that is until you hear this... * PONG, PONG, PONG, PONG! * What in the name of Heaven, Hell and everything in between was that?! * PONG, PONG! ** PONG, PONG! * * PONG, PONG! * Seriously, what was that sonic shitfest of a sound that had the displeasure of assaulting my eardrums?! Is that the sound of all encompassing negativity pounding through the fabric of space and time?! Maybe... you wanna know what that sound really is? It's the sound of the snare drum! Now you're probably wondering 'why does the snare sound so bad?' It's because during the recording of this album, Lars Ulrich turned the snare off of his snare drum, giving it a much louder ring. Apparently, Lars liked the sound of it so much, he decided to use it on the album. Uh, Lars, I have a quick question for you... Why would you do this, Lars?! Your snare is so loud and jarring that it distracts from the vocals and other instruments! It almost sounds like you're drumming on a cooking pot! This is just so... what's the word I'm looking for? I know, unprofessional! So after 30-something seconds of incessant instrumentation, we finally reach the lyrics... Saint Anger 'round my neck, Saint Anger 'round my neck, He never gets respect, Saint Anger 'round my neck... Uh, James, who is this St. Anger? Why is he around your neck? Is he choking you because you disrespected him? Can anybody explain what's going on here?! I have a feeling this song will score really high on 'nonsensicality.' (You flush it out, flush it out) Saaaaint Anger 'round my neck, (You flush it out, flush it out) Heeee never gets respect, (You flush it out, flush it out) Saaaaint Anger 'round my neck, (You flush it out, flush it out) Heeee never gets respect... So... to get rid of St. Anger, you have to flush it out? Like a turd? I still don't get it! Why are these lyrics so damn cryptic?! Also, James, why are you trying to sound like Chester Bennington? Why not sing "Craaaawling in my skiiiiin," while you're at it. Ugh, this song is making my head spin... like Peridot stuck in a toilet. Fuck it all and no regrets, I hit the lights on these dark sets I need a voice to let myself, to let myself go free Fuck it all and fuckin' no regrets, I hit the lights an these dark sets Medallion noose, I'll hang myself, St. Anger 'round my neck... Believe it or not, I consider this moment to be the "highlight" of the whole song... and I use the word "highlight" very loosely. Mainly because it references the lyrics of two classic Metallica songs, "Damage Inc." from Master of Puppets and "Hit the Lights" from Kill 'em All. However, those references will not save this song. I feel my world shake, like an earthquake Hard to see clear, is it me? Is it fear? I'm madly in anger with you, I'm madly in anger with you I'm madly in anger with you, I'm madly in anger with you Wow... just wow... I can't believe how much the band has fallen lyrically. This is almost "Shake it Off" level nonsensicality. And to think this song came from the same band who wrote classic songs like "Master of Puppets," "One," "Fade to Black," "Enter Sandman," etc. Maybe the next verse might be better... Saint Anger 'round my neck-- Wait, didn't we already hear this verse?! You mean to tell me that you couldn't think of another verse so you decided the first verse all over again?! It just makes me wonder what was going on at Metallica HQ during that time. As it turned out, 2001-2003 was a very tumultuous time for the band, to the point they almost broke up. Many factors, including the departure of longtime bassist Jason Newsted, James Hetfield going to rehab as well as rebuild his relationship with his family, and their lack of any pre-written material set the stage for this monstrosity. Hetfield once said the album's sessions were so open-minded that they became unfocused and pretty much embraced every dumb idea so no one's feelings would get hurt. I guess that explains the ridiculous songwriting here. This whole period was documented in the 2004 documentary Some Kind of Monster. Now let's get back to the song. Like I said earlier, we get another repeat of the first verse and chorus... actually, no, it's just one big chorus. Usually after the second chorus of any Metallica song, there would be a guitar solo from Kirk Hammett, right? Right? Nope. Turns out, there are no guitar solos anywhere on this song or on the entire album. Not a single tap of the Wah-Wah pedal or a twitch of the Whammy bar from Kirk, none. A lot of people were upset over the lack of solos when this album came out. As for me, I'm not that upset but a solo would've been nice to break up the monotony. That's another thing wrong with this song, it's long. Granted, it's not as long and boring as "American Pie" but "St. Anger" even more irritating. It's seven and a half minutes of Lars playing a pot, repetitive riffing, and cryptically ridiculous lyrics. And I want my anger to be healthy And I want my anger just for me And I need my anger not to control me And I want my anger to be me And I need to set my anger free And I need to set my anger free And I need to set my anger free And I need to set my anger free Set it free! Now I get it. This song is about setting your anger free in a healthy way. Kinda like how I'm setting my anger free through this blog. One thing, why you gotta be so repetitive? I think now's the time to wrap things up. That was "St. Anger" by Metallica. Do I hate this song? As James would say in the old days, Abso-fuckin-lutely! Here's why... The lyrics, music, structure, and production are just... they take horrendousness up to 11, not just by Metallica standards, but music standards in general. I mean, turning off the snare? What was Lars thinking?! In terms of repetition, it's pretty high. Hearing the same long verse twice in a row is such a chore to sit through. Meanwhile, the title of the song was used 13 times while the word 'anger' by itself was used 37 times. Granted, it's merely half as repetitive as "Shake it Off" but that's quite repetitive for Metallica. While this song has had no negative effects on me (aside from the annoying pong-pong), it had some on the band. When the album came out in 2003, despite debuting at number one on the Billboard and winning a Grammy, it garnered a lot of harsh criticism from critics and fans alike, calling it one of the worst albums ever made. However, on a more positive note, Metallica emerged a healthier and stronger band afterwards. James Hetfield described the St. Anger album as a purge, getting all the negativity out of him and a catalyst for the next chapter of the band. Thankfully, they've made great albums again with Death Magnetic and Hardwired to Self Destruct... well at least in my opinion. Now for the final score. Some categories went up to 11, they're that bad. And that concludes this entry of Musical Manslaughter. For my next entry... I don't know what I'm gonna do but I'll think of something... maybe...
  19. *blows dust away* It's been how long since I did a blog? Two months? That's not too bad. Wait, who am I talking too? I suck at writing intros... Greetings, everypony, your friendly neighborhood Woohoo here. For a while now, I've been thinking about using my blog on a more regular basis. Up until now, the only regular thing I do here on my blog is "Woohoo Rewatches: MLP Seasons," which is way too infrequent if you ask me. After weeks of thinking of ideas (mostly thinking up of a title), I finally came up with something. So here's the launch of my new projected, it's called: "You can't spell 'slaughter' without 'laughter' and these songs are jokes." Midnight Scribbler came up with the name and subtitle What is "Musical Manslaughter" about? Well if you can't tell by the title, I basically rip apart songs I absolutely hate in a pretty exaggerated and humorous way and give them a score. It's kind of like Mr. Enter's "Animated Atrocities" (only with less shouting) mixed in with Buckley's "Musical Autopsy" and "Todd in the Shadows." Also like Mr. Enter, I've created my own scorecard (seen below) where I'll score the songs on the following categories: Cringe-inducing lyrics: When the lyrics of a song cause me distress, pretty self-explanatory Cringe-inducing music: Same as above, except with the music Poor Production: Do I think the songwriting, sound quality, structure, song length, etc. is lacking Overplayed: Do I think this song is played way too much, this one is really subjective Overly Repetitious: Pretty self-explanatory, one of my many pet peeves in music Nonsensicality: Do I think the song's subject matter or lyrics are nonsensical, this one is also really subjective Negative Effects: Did the song do anything negative to me, such as getting stuck in my head, giving me nightmares, losing faith in humanity, etc. I'm also including the negative effects of the song on the artist(s) and other people. This is probably the most subjective category. Also, this category is two points per box, bringing the total score to 80 It's still somewhat of a work in progress... Yeah I'm totally ripping off Mr. Enter Now for some disclaimers. This is all my subjective opinion, so don't get your jimmies rustled when I tear into a song you like. Just because I hate your favorite song doesn't mean I'll hate you (but I might hate you if say something like "how dare u! dis is da gretest song eva and ur just a jelus hater! >:(") Also, I am not, and probably never will be, an expert on music so my opinions may come off as flawed. Like I said earlier, it's all my subjective opinion. I don't think I ever have been objective... maybe. Oh, one more thing. I don't take requests. Entry Index
  20. Hello everyone. Woohoo here with another entry of Musical Manslaughter, because you can't spell 'slaughter' without 'laughter' and these songs are jokes. Well, here I am once again not torn into pieces. It's been a while since I've done one of these. No, the last one doesn't really count because silence isn't really a song. Plus, it was April Fools Day. Anyways, on to business. The reason I haven't made an MMS in a while is... well, there isn't a lot of songs that make me angry. I could rant on more Taylor Swift songs but I don't wanna be labeled as "that guy who always rants on Taylor Swift" so I'm trying my best not rant on the same artist(s) over and over again. I just don't wanna be a one-trick pony. Anyways, I finally found a song that makes me angry, although not really at first. I didn't really pay attention to it until late last year. The more I heard it, the more it angered me. If you haven't already guessed from this entry's title, which is probably none of you, this song is by an artist named Ed... No, not that Ed. He's not even a musician... or real... Wrong Ed again. Great guitarist tho... That's the one. The messy red haired singer known as Ed Sheeran. Yep, I'm ripping apart an Ed Sheeran song. Oh boy, this will be a doozy. I can already hear those fangirls' keyboards tapping. Which Ed Sheeran song am I tearing into? None other than his #1 hit from last year, "Shape of You." Alright, I've shucked and jived long enough. So why do I hate this song? Let's break it down. So the song starts off with... Actually, I don't know what you'd call it. Anyways, this song starts off... with this... * Bing, bong, bing-bing, bong, bing-bing, bong, bing, bong-bong-bong * What... the... fuck... Seriously?! There's no way... unless... is this supposed to be the melody? Or is it the beat? Could someone in the comments tell me if this is a melody or a beat? Or even what instrument is being used? For now, I'm just going to call it the "bing-bong." Whatever the "bing-bong" is, it's fucking horrible! It's so bland, cheap, lazy, and unprofessional! Hell, it sounds more unprofessional than Lars Ulrich's snare on St. Anger. At least there's some heart behind that snare. Here, this "bing-bong" sounds so vapid, soulless, and it just sounds an unfinished demo. Alright, enough on the "bing-bong." Hopefully the music will change in the chorus. But then the lyrics come in... The club isn't the best place to find a lover, so the bar is where I go... I... actually agree with you, Ed. Clubs sucks! They're loud, crowded, obnoxious, and in no way the best place to find a lover. Bars are much more manageable... Wait, why am I talking about clubs and bars?! I need to stay focused. Me and my friends at the table doing shots Drinking fast and then we talk slow Come over and start up a conversation with just me And trust me I'll give it a chance now Take my hand, stop, put Van the Man on the jukebox And then we start to dance, and now I'm singing like... So far, the lyrics don't seem too bad. They're generic, yeah, but not infuriating like the songs I tore up earlier. It's just a song about a lonely guy going to a bar hoping to find a lover and eventually finding one. Also, who is this Van the man? I'm just gonna assume it's Van Morrison since you list him as one of your influences. However, after this verse, things go downhill fast... Girl, you know I want your love Your love was handmade for somebody like me Come on now, follow my lead I may be crazy, don't mind me Say, boy, let's not talk too much Grab on my waist and put that body on me Come on now, follow my lead Come, come on now, follow my lead What the actual hell, Ed?! Are you singing about... sex!? How could you?! Did you ever think of the children?! OK, I'm overacting but... how do put this. The idea of Ed Sheeran singing about sex feels off to me. I can't really explain why. Why, Ed? Why did you make a sex song? Is it because sex sells? If so, I ain't buying. I'm saving my money to buy peace. Also, and this is just me, this song almost feels like him selling out. Well, let's just hope he doesn't start twerking. Also, if this is a sex song, then it's one of the most unsexy sex songs ever. Hell, "Dead Skin Mask" by Slayer is eons sexier than this! Ugh, I'm already going crazy and I'm not even at the chorus yet. Speaking of which... I'm in love with the shape of you We push and pull like a magnet do Although my heart is falling too I'm in love with your body And last night you were in my room And now my bedsheets smell like you Every day discovering something brand new I'm in love with your body Oh—I—oh—I—oh—I—oh—I I'm in love with your body Oh—I—oh—I—oh—I—oh—I I'm in love with your body Oh—I—oh—I—oh—I—oh—I I'm in love with your body Every day discovering something brand new I'm in love with the shape of you Where do I even start with this?! Let me break it down... You're in love with the shape of her/her body? In other words, you just like her for her appearance. *sigh* Ed, didn't you parents, teachers, or anyone ever teach you it's what's on the inside that matters? I learned that in like diaper school. Loving someone just for their "shape" comes off as extremely shallow. What if this girl you love for her "shape" actually has a terrible personality inside? Or STDs? What do you think about that? I guess you didn't. "Push and pull like a magnet do"? No, Ed, it's "like a magnet does." Did you really forgo basic grammar just to make a cheap rhyme? This line could've been easily fixed with "like magnets do." Granted, it doesn't flow as well but it makes a lot more sense. Also, I can't believe I'm complaining about the grammar in a pop song. Fuckin' magnets... I should've brought up this issue in my "Shake It Off" entry so I'll bring it up here. The chorus is too damn long. By itself, it's 40 seconds. With the pre-chorus, it's a whopping 52 seconds long! Are you trying to bore the listeners?! Long choruses should not be in pop songs. They're not catchy. In my opinion, the chorus should've ended after the first "oh-I-oh-I" part. Oh, and remember when I hoped the "bing-bong" would stop at the chorus? Nope, it keeps on playing throughout the chorus. Are you kidding me, Ed?! Are you trying to bore and annoy your listeners?! In pretty much every song I've listened to throughout my life, the music changes with the chorus and/or verses, even if the change is minor. This has to be one of the laziest songs ever, both musically and lyrically. It's even lazier than "Shake It Off," and that's saying something. Then again, maybe the second verse might change my mind... One week in we let the story begin We're going out on our first date You and me are thrifty, so go all you can eat Fill up your bag and I fill up a plate We talk for hours and hours about the sweet and the sour And how your family is doing okay Leave and get in a taxi, then kiss in the backseat Tell the driver make the radio play, and I'm singing like... Nope, it's more the same shit. More unsexy lyrics followed by that long-ass chorus with that relentless "bing-bong." Do I need to complain any further about the "bing-bong"?! You can make a drinking game out of how many times I say "bing-bong." I haven't been this enraged at a song since "Shake It Off." It just begs the question: What the hell were they thinking?! *sigh* After that, we get to the bridge... I think... Come on, be my baby, come on Come on, be my baby, come on Come on, be my baby, come on Come on, be my baby, come on Come on, be my baby, come on Come on, be my baby, come on Come on, be my baby, come on Come on, be my baby, come on This is the only part of the song where the "bing-bong" isn't heard. I would say it's refreshing, but not really. It's just one line repeated eight times, and you all know how much I hate that. Also, I never understood why 'baby' is a pet name. It sounds degrading if you ask me. Alright, I think now's the time to wrap this up. And that was "Shape of You" by Ed Sheeran. Do I hate this song? Well, if you made it this far, you should already know. Now let me break it down for ya. My biggest issue with this song is the music, more specifically, the "bing-bong." Whether it's a melody or a beat, it's one of the worst pieces of music I have ever heard. Aside from the bridge, it's played throughout the entire song. Unacceptable. The lyrics don't help much either. Ed Sheeran's attempt at a sex song comes off as either generically bland or extremely cringy and it also made me feel dirty inside. Overplayed? Hell yeah it was is! I heard this song multiple times a day in late 2017 and I still hear to this day. Just the first note makes my blood pressure skyrocket to Yugopotamia. Now some of you are probably wondering if I hate Ed Sheeran. Surprisingly, I don't. I don't find him as irritating as most other pop stars, but boy, did he make quite a stinker of a song. Now for the final score. And that concludes this entry of Musical Manslaughter. How do you feel about this song? If you like it, that's fine. This is Woohoo, signing off.
  21. Blame Crispy and Viscra; their threads drove me to do this, because It's not all about guns, bitches, and bling. Have some POS to start out with. And yes, I fully expect this to be an unpopular thread.
  22. Hi everyone, I took a stab at video editing (my first) and did it by doing my own tribute to the awesome PMV that introduced me to all PMVs: "Kickstart my Pony" (posted by YouTube user Billy Deerhead back in 2012). I couldn't replicate his nifty character narrative - done with far less seasons of content, no less - but it's still ponies & rock, so I'm happy. This song has been done a lot, but man, does it fit the series. Hope you like it! PMV: Kickstart All the Ponies (Edit: Thanks for posting my video, Equestria Daily!)
  23. What's up, everypony? Woohoo here and welcome back to Musical Manslaughter, because you can't spell 'slaughter' without 'laughter' and these songs are jokes. Hope you all enjoyed your Fourth of July, because there's no better way to celebrate our independence than gorging ourselves with hot dogs, guzzling down beer, and blowing up fireworks. Anyway, on to the blog. So with the previous entries, I tore apart a couple of popular songs from the current decade. Now there are plenty of songs from this decade I wanna tear into, but if I continue in this direction, I'll eventually get a comment like this... OK, extremely over exaggerated but you get the idea. I am not one of those people on YouTube who post comments like "I was born in the wrong generation," "Music was soooo much better back then," or even "[Number of Dislikes] are Bieber Fans," etc. Despite all the crazy shit going on now, I actually prefer living in this generation. For this entry of MMS, we're doing something a little different. I'm going to take you back to the past... to shred a shitty song that sucks ass. A song from a magical time called the 1970s, where the only ways to access music were the radio or buying the album at a record store. Now this particular song has irritated me for a long time. A song that I have loathed for most of my life, as early as nine years old... and that song is "American Pie" by Don McLean. Now I bet you're wondering, "How can you hate this song?! You're a traitorous socialist fascist commie terrorist if you hate this song!" OK, how am I all of those things for hating a song?! Wait, why am I responding to my exaggerated hater comment?! Let's get back on topic... so why do I hate this iconic song? Let's break it down. Unlike the last two songs I reviewed, which started off with either a sickeningly obnoxious beat or the worst chorus in music history, "American Pie" actually starts of quite nicely with a soft piano melody and its first verse... A long, long, time ago, I can still remember how that music used to make me smile And I knew if I had my chance, that I could make those people dance and, maybe, they'd be happy for a while... Kinda like how I used to somewhat enjoy this song. However, after these couple lines, things start going downhill. But February made me shiver with every paper I delivered Bad news on the doorstep, I couldn't take one more step I can't remember if I cried when I read about his widowed bride But something touched me deep inside, the day the music died... Now we've reached my first major problem with this song, the line "the day the music died." Does this song even explain what it is? Nope. Alright, since Donny's not going to explain what it is, I guess I'll have to. Gather around, it's time for a little history lesson with Woohoo... No one sings like them anymore On February 3rd, 1959, Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens, and J.P. Richardson (aka The Big Bopper) boarded a plane in Mason City, IA en-route to Fargo, ND. Tragically, not long after takeoff, the plane lost control during a winter storm and crashed into a nearby cornfield, killing all three musicians and the pilot. To many people, this was a significant loss for the music industry as all three were prominent figures in the early days of Rock n' Roll. Do you want to know where did the name "The Day the Music Died" actually came from... the song I'm ranting on now! Thanks to "American Pie," which came out over a decade after the tragedy, this event is now known as the "The Day the Music Died." Now I usually save "Unfortunate Effects" until the end, but... WHY!? That's so ridiculous! I know their loss was tragic, but with a name like "The Day the Music Died," it just implies that all music died with them. Music can never die, it may have been wounded on that day, but it will never die... only the people who create it can. And why stop at "The Day?" Let's call last year "The YEAR the Music Died" due to how many famous musicians died then! Great, I'm already losing my sanity and I haven't reached the chorus yet. Speaking of which, the chorus is up next... So bye, bye, Miss American Pie Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry And them good ol' boys were drinkin' whiskey and rye Singin' "This'll be the day that I die" This'll be the day that I die I mean, seriously... what the hell does all that stuff have to do with this musical tragedy?! This chorus is absolutely nonsensical! I... I don't think I can comment any further... except maybe there's some deep psychological meaning hidden there, but I'm not going to waste my damn time trying to find out what it is... Speaking of time wasted, that goes into my next major problem, and probably the biggest problem with this song. It's... so... fucking... loooong! This song is a whopping eight minutes and thirty seven seconds long, the longest song ever to hit number one on the Billboard Hot 100, and it's nothing but verse-chorus-verse-chorus and so on. There are no bridges, no solos, no time changes, and not a single instrumental section longer than a few seconds to break up the monotony, it's just lyrics. Sure, the tempo changes slightly after the first chorus, but that doesn't change either! It's definitely one of those songs that tricks your brain to thinking it might be over, but nope, it keeps going on and on and on... There's a certain word to describe this song. Take it away, Pinkie! Now you're probably thinking "Oh, you just hate long songs! You must have ADD or have an attention span of a squirrel!" That's not true. I love long songs when they're done right. "American Pie" is an example of a long song done wrong. There are many long song I enjoy eons more than "American Pie," some are even longer than longer than this festering pile of boredom. Here are a few examples that I like: Rush - "2112" 20:32 Pink Floyd - "Echoes" 23:30 Iron Maiden - "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner" 13:34 Guns N' Roses - "Coma" 10:17 Bon Jovi - "Dry County" 9:52 Metallica - "...And Justice For All" 9:46 Led Zeppelin - "Achilles Last Stand" 10:26 ...And many more. As for the rest of the song, the lyrics just sound like rambling. While some lyrics relate to the subject, which I think is rock 'n roll, but then you get lyrics that are completely nonsensical, like this verse... But, that's not how it used to be When the jester sang for the king and queen In a coat he borrowed from James Dean And a voice that came from you and me Oh and while the king was looking down The jester stole his thorny crown The courtroom was adjourned No verdict was returned You know what? I'm just gonna wrap things up before I lose anymore of my surviving brain cells. And that was "American Pie." Do I still hate this song? Absolutely! In fact, I hate this song even more as an adult than when I was a kid. Here's why... The lyrics, for the most part, are confusing, nonsensical, and have as much correlation as New Kids on the Block and Chinese food. While the vocals and music of this song are way better than the last two songs, because it's dragged on for over eight minutes, it makes the song irritating to me. Why they made this song so damn long, I'll never know. As I stated early, I've hated this song since I was nine, mostly due to hearing this song on the bus home almost every week during fourth grade. It doesn't help that fourth grade wasn't a very good year for me so this song does trigger some bad memories. I found this song nonsensical as a kid and I still find it nonsensical now. Maybe I'll get it better when I'm 40. I still don't get why this song is so popular... maybe it's because 'Murica. Now for the final score. That concludes this entry of Musical Manslaughter. This one was a lot more detailed than the previous entry since I had more history with this song. If you like this song, that's fine, I won't hate you. For my next song, we're going back into the past again, but not too far, to shred a terrible song by an artist I actually like.. and going to see them live really soon.
  24. Woohoo

    Musical Manslaughter: Rage Man Ivy

    What's up everypony, Woohoo here and welcome back to Musical Manslaughter, because you can't spell 'slaughter' without 'laughter' and these songs are jokes. Well, here I am once again, thankfully not torn into pieces. I was expected to be eviscerated by the Swifties here on the forums after I posted my entry on "Shake it Off." I guess there aren't as many Swifties here or maybe the novelty of the song has finally worn off. Anyhoo, on my last blog, I said the next song I would tear into would be a song that claims to be a tribute song to one of the greatest singers of the last century when it's really just another song about getting laid. What's the name of the song you may ask? It's in the title of the blog, "Rage Man Ivy." Well, it's an anagram of the singer's name. I'll give you a moment to figure it out. Cue the Jeopardy music! Times up! For those who figured it out, the answer is none other than... Marvin Gaye! Now before you jump to conclusions... no, I'm not tearing apart a song by Marvin Gaye. I'm way above that. I'm actually tearing apart a more recent song, which, believe it or not, is actually titled "Marvin Gaye" by Charlie Puth and featuring Meghan Trainor! I kid you not. This is an actual song! Even I can't believe this song exists. I didn't even know about this song until I saw ToddintheShadows' "Top Ten Worst Hit Songs of 2015" video and this song was number one... and probably for good reason. As for how much I know about these two, I don't know much about Charlie Puth, and Meghan Trainor I know about because she made the sonic shitfest that is "All About That Bass," which barely has any bass in the song. Ok, I'm done rambling now. So why do I hate this song? Let's break it down... With most pop songs, it usually opens with a few beats, the melody comes shortly after, then the first verse, and finally the chorus, which usually hooks the listener. Not this song, oh no... this song has the nerve to start with the damn chorus. And they're not by playing a little instrumental bit beforehand, oh no-no-no, this song instantly starts with the chorus, giving the listener little to no time to mentally prepare. As for the chorus, take a listen to this... Let's Marvin Gaye and get it on, you are the healing that I want Just like they say it in the song, so until the dawn, let's Marvin Gaye and get it on Hold on for a moment please, I need to find the right gif that best describes how I feel... Ah, here we are. What... the... actual... FUCK!? I.. I cannot believe what I just heard! I don't even know what to say right now, I'm in such shock from hearing this... abomination. Alright, I need to calm myself down before I do something unforgivable... *inhales* Ah, much better. There is just so much wrong with this chorus but let me focus on what I think are the worst... How dare they... Seriously, how fucking dare they use the Prince of Soul's name as a cheap euphemism for sex! These two should be ashamed of themselves! I think I can hear Marvin rolling in his grave right now. This is just disgraceful, disgusting, despicable, disrespectful, dis-... I don't have anymore dis-words, but yeah, how insulting. I'm starting think these two have no idea who Marvin Gaye was... "Let's Marvin Gaye and get it on?" Wow, such clever, much genius, very amaze... No, just no. Using a singer's name as a verb? How childish! This just hurts my brain almost as much as Taylor Swift saying "this sick beat." Anyone can come up this shit! Hell, I'll even make some up of my own: Let's Iron Maiden and Run to the Hills, let's Rolling Stones and Paint It Black, let's Michael Jackson and Beat It. I think you get the idea now. This is me personally, but I'm not particularly fond of songs that start with the chorus. To me, it just feels like a quick and easy way to get the listener hooked to the song. As for me, most of the time, I prefer to be warmed up before I'm hooked. Another thing is it makes the chorus much more repetitive than it should and you know how much I hate that. However, I can make exceptions with some songs, such as "Paradise City" by Guns N' Roses. That song knows how to warm up the listener with Slash's dream-like guitar melody and Axl's unforgettable lyrics. Other songs I like that start with the chorus: "Back in the Saddle" - Aerosmith "Can't Buy Me Love" - The Beatles "You Give Love a Bad Name" - Bon Jovi "If I Could Turn Back Time" - Cher "Any Way You Want It" - Journey "Crawling" - Linkin Park "Fuel" - Metallica "Fat Bottomed Girls" - Queen I don't think I can comment any further. That chorus alone is a reason enough for me to hate this song. This is, without a doubt, one of the worst lines in the history of music, right up there with any of the lines from "Shake it Off." Also, this is one of the worst choruses I have ever heard in a song. It may not be as overly repetitive as "Shake It Off" but this chorus really takes the cake in terms of nonsensicality. As for the other lyrics, they're not really worth talking about. It's just another pop song about sex, as if they're aren't a million of those already. If this song wasn't titled "Marvin Gaye" and did not have that atrocious chorus, I probably would've just shrugged this song off. However, during the second chorus, this line comes in... You've got to give it up to me I'm screaming "Mercy, mercy, please!" Is that a reference to "Mercy, Mercy Me"? If so, are you kidding me?! "Mercy, Mercy Me" is about the environment, not sex! Are they implying that Marvin Gaye only wrote songs about sex?! Now I'm convinced that Chuck, Meg, and whoever the hell wrote this song have no idea who Marvin Gaye was. Why is this song even called "Marvin Gaye" when the lyrics aren't even about Marvin Gaye?! Wait, what if it's not the lyrics but the music that relates to Marvin Gaye? Maybe, just maybe... nope. The music sounds nothing like Marvin Gaye! He made Motown Soul while this audio atrocity of a song is just '50s do-wop mixed in with some atrocious trap drum track! Why does this song even exist?! Who allowed this to happen?! WHY AM I ASKING THESE QUESTIONS?!?! Alright, time to wrap this up before I reach "Shake it Off" level insanity. And that was "Marvin Gaye" by Charlie Puth and Mehgan Trainor... *Shudders* Just saying that burns my tongue. Do I hate this song? Abs-total-olutely! Is it one of the worst songs of 2015? Definitely! Here's why. The lyrics, aside from mentioning his name and a few song titles, have absolutely nothing to do with Marvin Gaye. Same with the music, nothing to do with him either. Chuck and Meg's vocals are irritating, but I think Chuck sounds the worst. He sounds like he was recently castrated. As for Meg... no comment. It's just another pop song about sex with Marvin's name slapped on it, and quite frankly, it's probably the most unsexy sex song I have ever heard. I did hear this song a lot during 2015-early 2016, but it was nowhere near the overplayed-ness of "Shake if Off," probably because it only reached 21 on the Billboard Hot 100. The nonsensicality of this song is just astronomical. I mean writing a song called "Marvin Gaye" when it's not even about Marvin Gaye? What's the point of this song's existence?! That's greater than or as equal as nonsensical as "Shake It Off," and that song has somewhat of a reason to exist. Alright, I'll stop mentioning that song. As for any unfortunate effects on me, the only effect was getting stuck in my head, though not nearly enough as... that other song. Here's some advice: if you're going to write a song named after person, famous or not, make sure the lyrics and/or music actually relate to them. Now for the final score. Not as bad as the last entry but still pretty bad. That concludes this entry of Musical Manslaughter. This entry was a little less detailed than my last entry, probably because I had less history with this song. Just remember, if you like this song, that's fine, I won't hate you. For my next song I'm tearing into, I'm going back into the past. Now if you excuse me, I'm going to Metallica and Fade to Black...
  25. What's up, everypony? Woohoo here with my atrocious intro writing abilities. Anyways, welcome to the first entry of Musical Manslaughter, because you can't spell 'slaughter' without 'laughter' and these songs are jokes. While I was planning MMS, I was thinking, "how should I kick off the series?" or "what song should I do first?" It didn't take me long to choose one. There is a song... a certain song... A certain song that infuriates me to unspeakable levels. It makes my blood pressure skyrocket to Pluto whenever I hear even the slightest note on the radio. It rustles my jimmies to Oblivion and back. This song causes me nothing but agony and misery... and pain... and ridicule and anger and pain... and suffering... and pain... Alright, I'm done with my long winded overly-exaggerated rambling. If you didn't catch the little reference in the logo (which I combined with the popular meme "extra thicc"), that song is... "Shake It Off" by Taylor Swift Taylor, you perv! VEVO couldn't have picked a worse thumbnail Oh boy, this is going to be a doozy... Before I rip apart this song, I want to talk a little bit about the artist behind the song: Taylor Swift. She really needs no introduction. In less than a decade, she transformed herself from a sweet curly-haired country princess into arguably the biggest female pop star in the world. Everyone has their opinion on Tay-Tay, whether you love, hate, or probably not care at all about her. With all of the success she’s had, it’s not really surprising that she'd be polarizing. As for my opinion? Up until 2014, I was never a fan of Taylor. I simply saw her as just another popular singer who made one-dimensional yet sometimes catchy music. I never really cared about her relationships, breakups, or feuds, though I did find a bit annoying but that's just me. But then, everything changed in the summer of 2014 when the Fire Nation attacked she made "Shake it Off," a song addressing how she's shaking off all the haters. Since then, I absolutely can't fucking stand her anymore! Just the mention of her name makes my face go full on Yellow Diamond. Damn, I'm rambling again... So how did this one song forever tarnish my perception on Taylor Swift... let's break it down. So the song begins with a very basic beat. Nothing good, nothing bad, it's just somewhat tolerable (for now...) But then the lyrics come in... I stay out too late, got nothing in my brain, That's what people say, mmhmm, that's what people say, mmhmm Wow, only 15 seconds in and we already have a red flag. First off, who the hell is complaining about you staying out too late? I mean, you have concerts to perform and those go on pretty late. The only person who should be concerned about staying out too late is yourself. To say people complain about you staying out too late is a crock of shit. As for "got nothing in my brain," maybe it's because people think you have the mentality of a 15 year old, which goes into the next lines... I go on too many dates (chuckles), but I can't make 'em stay, At least that's what people say, mmhmm, that's what people say, mmhmm Ugh, that chuckle was so unnecessary... Honestly, I don't really care about who you date. You can date whoever you want. Hell, you can date a rock and I still wouldn't care. Although I think Maud Pie would have a problem with that. As for the people who do complain about you "going on too many dates but can't make them stay," it's probably because of two things. They're sick and tired of you writing songs about your breakups. They think know you make them want to break up with you so you can write yet another song about bad they were, which usually becomes a hit on the charts and makes you more money. Maybe one day, you will realize that maybe, just maybe, you are the problem... Moving on! But I keep cruising, can’t stop, won’t stop moving It's like I got this music in my mind, saying "It's gonna be alright" It's not gonna be alright... because I have to hear the goddamn chorus right now! ‘Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate Baby, I’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake I shake it off, I shake it off Heart-breakers gonna break, break, break, break, break And the fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake, fake Baby, I’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake I shake it off, I shake it off Ho... ly... shit, this is horrible! One of the worst choruses I ever heard! Where do I even begin with this?!... "Players gonna play?" "Haters gonna hate?" Why are you stating the obvious?! Are you also gonna tell me the sky is blue or night is black?This has got to be some of her laziest songwriting ever. No effort whatsoever. It's even lazier than Rebecca Black's "Friday" and that's saying something. Do you really need to repeat last word of each line five times? Why so much repetition?! Do you really think that's catchy?! Do you realize repeating the same things over and over is annoying to many people? There is a very fine line between catchy and annoying. This song not only crosses the line, it fucking obliterates it. Nothing says "I don't care about what the haters say" than putting weeks/months worth of effort into writing a song to tell them that. Frankly, the more you keep hammering that into their brains, the more likely they'll think that you actually do care about what they say. Wow, that was a mouthful. Seriously, if you can't handle criticism, constructive or otherwise, then you are probably in the wrong profession. Then again, I should've expected this from the same artist who wrote the song "Mean," verbally attacking a critic for, of all horrible things, doing his job. America's Sweetheart, everybody... Ugh, not even a halfway there and I'm already losing my sanity, but I can't stop now... Onto the next verse. I never miss a beat, I'm lightning on my feet That's what they don't see, mmhmm, that's what they don't see, mmhmm I'm dancing on my own, I make the moves up as I go That's what they don't know, mmhmm, that's what they don't know, mmhmm What the hell does dancing have to do with shaking off the haters?! I'm not gonna waste too much time on this verse, probably because it's so confusing, so I'm just gonna comment on just this one line. Lightning on your feet, you say? Sorry Taylor, but you ain't got shit on Sanic the HegeHoge. He's the fastest meme aliiiiiiive! Like any other song, we get another repeat of the chorus, except more "Shake it Offs" are added in! WHYYYY?! Do you realize repeating the same things over and over is annoying to many people?! Great, now I'm repeating myself! So now we get to... the bridge... Hey, hey, hey, just think while you’ve been getting down and out about the liars and the dirty, dirty cheats of the world... Yes I am down and out, because you're one of them. You could've been getting down to this... sick.. beat... Remember earlier when I said the beat of this song was tolerable? Well, after this one line, it becomes intolerable! Sick beat... seriously, Taylor?! You call that beat sick?! It sounds like it was made in Pro-Tools using the "Make a Random Beat" button! Then again, I guess that beat is sick... sickeningly obnoxious! You want to hear a real sick beat? Hit it, professor! My ex-man brought his new girlfriend, she’s like “Oh, my god!” but I’m just gonna shake And to the fella over there with the hella good hair, won’t you come on over, baby? We can shake, shake, shake Because it wouldn't be a Taylor Swift hit song without mentioning one of her exes. Also, stop trying to rap. You're making yourself look like a bigger fool than you already are. Alright, time to wrap this up. We get one more repeat of the damn chorus... except with even more "Shake it offs" added in! Once again, WHYYYYYY?! Enough is ENOUGH! Why do you keep repeating yourself?! Did you not have any ideas how to end your song or did you just not feel like it? That's so lazy! Every time I hear you say "shake it off," I feel like I lose 10 IQ points each time! Just when I'm about to completely lose my sanity, the song finally ends. And that was "Shake it Off" by Taylor Swift. Do I still hate this song? Hell yeah! Is it any better than when I first heard it in 2014? Hell no! You know why? Let me break it down for ya. The lyrics are so lazy, poorly structured, and most of all, overly repetitious. Her vocals sound so processed and grating, far from her sweet sounding voice from her early days, and the beat is sickeningly obnoxious (thanks to a certain line.) The overall repetition in this song... oh boy, of the 585 words (yeah I counted) used in this song, the titular line was used 36 times and the word "shake" by itself was used a whopping 78 TIMES! That's more times than Justin Bieber says "Baby" in his signature song. In fact, at least 60% of this song is spent repeating itself, and I find that unacceptable! I know that music is built on repetition, but this song went way too far. Alright, enough about the repetition let's talk about overplayed-ness. When this song first came out, it hit number one on the charts and I could not get away. I think I heard this song like at least 5 times a day almost everywhere I went during late 2014-early 2015, constantly getting stuck in my head and giving me migraines! While I'll admit the song has a decent message of being yourself and not taking shit from anyone, it loses itself within the surrounding nonsense. I find it very nonsensical that she wasted so much effort to write a song to tell the haters that she's going to shake 'em off. If she really wanted to shake 'em off, she shouldn't have made this song. If anything, this song probably reinforced their hatred of her as well as spawning more haters, including myself. As for negative effects on me, there were a lot, but let me list a few... Lost what little resect I had for Taylor Swift... also Max Martin, who went from producing my favorite jams like "I Want It That Way" and "It's My Life" to this train-wreck! This song got stuck in my head constantly to the point of agony. I would have Taylor related nightmares almost every night for over a year, not even Luna could save me. Friends and co-workers teased me and claimed I secretly loved Taylor. Aren't they a little old to be teasing?! My dad and I got stuck in her traffic when she came to Seattle in August 2015 and we missed my ferry to Bainbridge Island. Now for the final score. Pretty abysmal, isn't it? Yeah I consider this the worst song I ever heard, but this is just my opinion. If you like this song, that's alright, I won't hate you. And that concludes the first entry of Musical Manslaughter. Join me next time when I rip apart a song that claims to be a tribute to one of the greatest singers of the last century when the song is actually a ridiculously corny sex song... Now I wait for the Swifties to come and eviscerate me...