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Found 12 results

  1. If I could go back... To that one day... Where all was carefree and gay Where no one or nopony hesitated to offer a snack... What would I do...? What would I say...? Would the hurt go away? Would they see me as somepony brand new? Would somepony be against me? Would they hold a grudge? Would they see the new me? Would the image of the old me in their mind not even budge? I am scared I am afraid With the impression I've already made... I don't think I'm even prepared... I am a beggar inside... Always wanting and needing But with my selfish gain and pride...*sniffle* How could I...fess up and...say what I...really need...? I know s-she was there... ...and left me...to chase her dreams... I...*sniffle*...can't undo it all This is...my biggest...*sniffle*...fall... If...I could go back...I would *starts sobbing lightly* Heal all the wounds that I...inflicted... I know it's never too late...but... All my guilt is making me feel so...constricted...*still sobbing* I'm strong... I-I'm brave...*sniffles trying to recover from her sobbing* But...I feel so...weak... Like...I'm...all alone in a cave... Please... If you can hear me... I-I wanna start this over...*stands up and wipes her face with a talon* And make it right... Because now I see it...and understand... What is now...is now...but our future...will be brighter than the brightest star...in all of the land... ~Gilda A freewrite I did one day when I was thinking. Hope you guys like it.
  2. OK, I found this pretty fascinating, and an easy to repeat social experiment for pretty much anyone willing to give it a try. Eating in front of a mirror makes food taste better. Or so say scientists in a recent study. Now I know a lot of us probably either eat alone, or in front of some computer or media device, but for the sake of it, maybe try dining in front of a mirror next time? Considering we are all friendless wanderers who hide from the sun... (oh wait.. that is just me. Although I bet it is some of you to... you know who you are! ) I figured this would be something any of us are able to do and share our results. I am not so sure I would be so easy to fool in that way, but heck if it makes dinner more tasty, I am game to try it a couple of times. I would be very interested to hear the results of anyone else giving it a try. Remember you would probably need to do it a couple of times with different types of foods to get a valid survey. I am also open to any opinions and thoughts upon it as well. I figure I will mess around with it for a week and see how it goes. Too bad i already ate a bit earlier... otherwise I could start now.
  3. A quick depressing but beautiful piece I made in Photoshop! "When there is sadness, friends will always be there. But when your friends aren't there, sadness is your only friend." Brony.memes is my Instagram page in case anyone asks about it.
  4. The next comic I'm making in my series has two characters standing next to a window, in an almost profile point of view. I want their reflections to be visible in the window, so does anyone know of a good method or of any tutorials that can help me create a convincing reflection? If you want me to upload pics, let me know.
  5. October 31st, 2015 Music : https://soundcloud.com/officialotarine/otarine-id-270-mastering-mp3-v3/s-pdvQC https://soundcloud.com/officialotarine/otarine-id-280wip-almost-finished/s-i62ol With each passing day, I continue to write music or build upon concepts I once dreamed of. The impossible eventually grow into the possible, and the dreams become reality. Small progress overtime has brought upon gigantic leaps of success in my 4 years of songwriting. Starting out from humble beginnings, I only truly have now realized the impact of many tiny improvements overtime. From the desperation, the longing, to emulate popular music conventions and be popular as well. I've grown to desire something much more important than simply materialistic impressions from populations that will forget me in time. I've come to desire something much more emotional and intimate than before : I want to make music from the heart. It all started with the "Felicity"-era music I had created in 2014. It was when I had first pursued an emotional product that conveys something so much more than just "catchy". I desired to create miraculous pieces of music art, where the product evokes emotion within the audience. This was reached with minimal success. Although my ideas were good, my production was sloppy and definitely not as good as before. And yet, I cannot help but feel something special with my "Felicity" music. Being my first attempt at concept-yet-danceable music, it was but a rough draft of my music to come. I improved production-wise as well as theory-wise and the result can be heard within my new music. My new songs (such as the Fall Apart remix, and The Mirror remix- both released) have been met with critical acclaim, people love it! But then again, why does it feel like they don't amass to the same quality as the stuff I made in 2014? Why has my music gotten even more professional yet lose what "Felicity" and "Falling Snow" had had? That is the question I ask myself every single day. I cannot say it is because of sentimentality, because the acquaintances around me have also shared the same thoughts. I try so hard to keep balance between my emotional desire that started with Felicity, and the professional sound brought upon by my own successes. But that raises a question... Is it possible that the more professional one gets, the farther they are from true emotion music? True, I have tried my best to evoke emotion and "feels" as much as Felicity, and my new music still sounds much less artificial and forced compared to my music pre-2014, but Felicity continues to be the wave of music I listen to time and time again. Definitely not for nostalgia's sake, as I hold no nostalgia for my older music, I fail to see a reasonable argument for that. But maybe it's because my old, amateur, messier-sounding music had the great ideas that were not limited by proper chord progressions, proper melodies, and "proper" music. Alas, that is also proven wrong, as I have created something professional, yet unconventional, but also emotional, and personal. Demolished were my beliefs that professionalism cannot still have feeling, as I have witnessed myself the hints of personality that are ever-so outpouring within my newer music. Rather, the experience of a year has actually evolved my belief of "professional" music. For why do people believe that professionalism cannot exist within the same realm of personal desire and emotion? Why do we feel the need to conceal personality in order to feel like a professional? Can there not be a compromise between the two sides that brings us to a better and much more improved personal self, as well as product? Coming-of-age and success stories all beg the question of whether professionalism and personalization are two different realms. What I like to believe today, is that one can achieve the "professional" improvements of experience and understanding, yet still be able to conserve the creative, yet unconventional, dreams found within the youth. One can always be a youth, be it to a new field of work, or a new art medium. In conclusion, I'd have to say that one must always hold onto the ideas of youth, but find their own comfortable way to blend it with the mastering of their respective art: something we know as the "professional" side. ... I had forgotten it is halloween. Oops. Sorry for pretentious rambling. This was a mistake.
  6. If you would have your own rainbow reflection (or you already had), like the mane-6 ponies had in season 4, which one would it be? I didn't have mine yet, but I think that mine will be when I'll discover and experience true friendship with someone special.
  7. Note to Reader: Short version: It's been over a year since I've came across this site. It's been over a year since I signed up to be a member. It's been over a year since I wrote my first reply.It's been over a year since I wrote my own thread, checked my notifications, brohoof'd a post, sent a private message and even added a new friend. A year since I added a new friend on the forums.... That's huge. Over that time I took a long break from the forums (because of difference reasons) but most of my year was spent in the early part of the year going into the summer. I have racked up 226 active posts, 5days 16hours 20mins and 52seconds of total time on the forums, 116 brohoofs, 949 profile views, 117 brohoofs given, 11 topics started, and 0 warning points. I would like to thank all of my friends and you, the reader for making 2013 a great brony year for me. I remember the reason why I made this account to begin with. Everyone here is part of a larger family in which we can all support each other and our struggles, or endeavors. It's weird to think that I started out just looking for some random brony video online and I ended up here, with everyone. This year has taught me a lot about myself and what I value. I have grown into a better person because of everyone's love and support.
  8. so i was wondering what have you done this year? January: i started the year just getting my laptop, getting into the internet with the likes of youtube and memes March: ponies came into my life April-June: ponies July-August: internet, minecraft September: school November: revising for tests December: aced tests, Chrismas
  9. This morning was weird... It felt like I was back in the 90s when all seemed beautiful and simple with the world. The air felt unusually brisk, the sunlight itself almost felt alive... When in nostalgia, I remember mornings at my grandmother's house. I felt that same brisk air and living light as if the world was smiling down on me. I found myself thinking about how I'm going to live the rest of my life. What the inside kept telling me is that the fast-paced corporate life isn't for me but would instead be better as something temporary. What I seem to long for instead would be a life of tranquility, serenity and simplicity. What's really strange about this is how and when it happened. Yesterday, I spent all day inside, only stepping outside my campus room for lunch and other necessities. The day before that I had gotten an epileptic seizure and had to be admitted to the hospital but was released at night of the same day. Seems like that episode may or may not have done a little more than just send me into a state of unconsciousness for a few minutes but I'll never know for sure. Well, after a day of school and after getting slightly pissed off about something, I'm no longer in that strange state of nostalgia. What I do remember thinking about regarding that goal was getting off the grid... Well, this isn't anything new for people who already know me but what set this apart is that it felt like I was thinking about this like I was 10 years old again. Hell, this whole nostalgia experience made me feel like I was a little boy again. Hm... Even at that age I thought about having a vegetable garden because even then, it seemed clear to me that money was a source of stress after seeing how it affected my dad. I loved the idea of free electricity as well but since this is before I knew about even the basics of electricity, let alone technologies like wind and solar, well... What went through my mind all those years ago seemed nothing short of magic to put it in a way that doesn't sound too embarrassing. Even back then I dreamed of a frugal life so I could afford to live a simpler, less hectic life even if it doesn't pay as much and still have enough leisure time to stop and enjoy the simple things in life. But before I can do any serious thinking in this area, I'll want to finish the curriculum for my BA in electrical engineering.
  10. Been a horrible, horrible blogger the past few months; almost nothing at all going on. I'm afraid I simply haven't found the interest or time to write out any more DeviantART art review pieces, and I also never get around to blogging about anything else. Who knows, maybe that can change soon. In the meantime, here's a blog referring to my thoughts on the long-awaited installment of Double Rainboom, the first full-fledged MLP:FiM episode created by the fanbase. Enjoy and whatnot~ Source: Double Rainboom
  11. Hey all! I made this a few minutes ago! Although I made a v2 of it - This one, you can see Derpy in it more. Could you tell me which one you like more? Thanks! EDIT: GET THIS AS AN ICON!
  12. There was a time when I thought that I was too late to see him. I don't know if I still believe that. I heard about the news on that March 2nd afternoon. He left on Thursday the week before. I thought it was a joke and I rushed outside. He wasn't inside the garage. He wasn't laying around backyard. I ran to his doghouse and he was there. The different colored dirt told me. I sped back inside and I saw my sister holding onto my mom. That's when I knew he really was gone, and the tears rushed down. I sat down in front of my food, slowly picking up the rice and beef I had that day. My parents explained it was something that we all were expecting. He was getting old and we knew he was going to pass on soon. I understood all that, but, at the time, I thought it was too soon. Or that I was too late. I went back to my room and I couldn't do anything that day. It was just him. My dog. Coco. I hadn't seen him since January when I left back for college for the Spring semester. I was just into work that whole time. Resident Assistant applications, math and physics work, a speech project, a writing paper, a lot of programming, interview preparations. My parents had called me multiple times throughout January and February if I was coming back at any point. The same response I gave was that I was too busy. And I was. I needed to keep my grades up to keep a $14,000 scholarship. I had to work at my work-study job to help with other school expenses. I needed to do well in this application so I can become a Resident Assistant in the future and have free room, board, and food expenses paid for so that my parents wouldn't have such a burden on my school finances. I worked to help my parents, but maybe they knew something about Coco during that time. I've never asked yet, but I understand what they were doing. They didn't want that burdening me with the work I already had. And that it was better in person. Nonetheless... After finishing up many things, I went home. I learned the truth. And I cried I never dealt with death before. And it was with someone whom I knew for most of my life up to this point. I was four when I first got him. Me and my sister played with Coco so much when we were young. He was a weird dog in that he never liked dog food and preferred regular chicken, beef, and bones. Especially bones. I remember at my young age that I tried to ride him at some point, but he would always try to go away. I was stupid at the time. Common sense doesn't hit us that soon anyway. He always hated baths and he loved chewing balls. He was a great dog. He even prevented the theft of my dad's car at one point! His barking woke my dad up. My dad saw the assailant try and break in his car, but he ran outside with a bat, cursing at him as the assailant ran away. I don't remember if Coco got awarded for that. But like all other dogs and their owners, Coco was my very close friend. He was there all the time, regardless if we punished him for something bad. But, like all dogs, they unconditionally love us. He unconditionally loved my family and I. I loved hugging his fluffy fur. I loved his black coat and white underside with his white furry toes. It always made me think he was wearing a tuxedo. His eyes always made me smile. Coco in general made me smile. But he left... I never said goodbye. I was too late. I think that is what keeps me sad about his death. I only wish I knew his time was coming and that I could have arrived a week earlier. I wanted to pet him and feed him and be with him one more time. But I missed the chance. I just wanted to saw goodbye before he closed his eyes one more time. I wanted to hold him. But on that March 3rd afternoon, I saw a patch of dirt that was different from the rest around it. And I just wanted him. I wanted to see him one more time. I wanted to dig him up, but I knew it was disrespectful. I can't see any of his pictures. They just remind me that he is gone. I haven't looked at any of them since then. People always say that you should remember the good times, but it's difficult for me at least. I just wanted to see him one last time, and maybe it wouldn't be so hard to remember the good times. I was too late. Why can't I have a second chance? You were there for me, Coco. Why couldn't have I been there for you? I wanted to see you. Before you left. I can see his photos again. But I stare into his eyes. And they aren't the eyes I am looking for. It's not the same. I want the real Coco. And I don't know what to do. I want to give him a big hug. I want to remember the good memories without tearing up. I want to say goodbye. But maybe it's time to move on... I can't do anything now, as much as I wish I could... I can only continue to live and remember the good times he brought me in my youth. Only remember him as one who always smiled. Only remember him who loved every kind of meat and more. Only remember him as a smart dog that knew the commands that were taught to him both left and right. Only remember him as the dog who was always with you. Only as an amazing dog and pet. Only as my close friend. Only as Coco. May 2nd, 1997 - February 23rd, 2012