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Found 5 results

  1. Since I saw a thread about the most toxic online communities, and a post about a gaming community in there, I decided to make a thread dedicated to the absolute worst video game communities. Which do you think is the worst and why? I think League of Legends is an obvious choice. The community has constant drama and has driven multiple people over the edge. Not to mention it has a serious reputation for toxicity and trolling.
  2. Welcome dear readers to my 2nd walltext on my blog. Prepare yourself, be ready for minutes of reading (during writing of this I had realised I just want to pour out again or rather: to sorrow, because I fell the need again, nothing more). You can respond with feedback - I'll take the feedback no matter of the positive or negative side of the judge. Let's begin. ================ I know, that when it comes to question like asking about someone's behaviour, you'll get unique answers based on your point of view, way of thinking and personal experiences. Why am I asking myself if I'm toxic? Well, few situations. 1. Friend getting annoyed I had known him for 2 years (minecraft server), we're been talking on Discord since August of 2k17, we are very inteligent young people (I'm 16, he's 13), who are talking culturally and with class on many difficult topics. For months. Everyday or every few days a new topic comes to discussion and it never gets boring. However, it all changed, when I confessed to him that I'm a brony (May 2k18 from what I remember). He respected me for some time after that confession, althought I was confessing being a more fanatic and fanatic Brony by other MLP or beloved Starlight-related activities. He started to doubt in my "rationalness" when I changed an avatar and a signature to strictly Starlight-related on minecraft forum (June 2k18), shortly after I changed avatar also on Discord to Starlight-related (also June, but late, from what I remember). He started to partially mock me for that, but he still had some respect when it came to pony topics. However when I confessed again (I still had lots of trust to him) that I sleep with 4'' (10cm) Starlight figure and I want to buy a 20'' (50cm)+ plushie for 1 200 PLN (average salary about 2 000 PLN netto), he started to really ride me like on bald mare. He had lost ability to normally interact with me (or I with him, that's also possible), when it came to pony topics. He's talking about a plushie as a "some material" and he doesn't understand why I want to have that plushie. I answer that for my pleasure and relax. Sadly, it's infantile and childish for him. - How many years do you have? - he asks - 16 - I answer - So why you are doing such childish things? - Why age should determine what you can do? - *dodging answer* So I fell like he just don't want and won't want understand why I am so obsessed in topic, especially Starlight. It doesn't matter anymore, that I had answered him multiple times. To check my argument, he started to watch S1 E1 - after 5 mintues he said "Stop, I can't take it anymore. What's your favourite episode? I'll watch it instead." - I answered "Every one with Starlight in, but especially S6 E21, because I was laughing so much on them." So he watched the whole episode and commented something like that "Childish humour, made for kids, for girls; and seriously - do you really think that your and Starlight's personality are similar? She's so demanding <and overall not pleasuring>.". I knew from this moment that I won't be able to convince him about my fascination about the show and especially my favourite character. And it was a few more weeks and yesterday after a talk with dear Califorum I decided to block him not temporarily (like last time, when he was constantly sending stupid MLP braindraining parodies and was saying "This is funny, I convice you, this is funny, not some MLP sh*t"), but permanently. Not to mention, that he was constantly swearing when it came to MLP/Starlight topics, because I blurted that too often for him. Anyways, I would block a few more people, but the problem is that this is my... 2. ...Family My nearest family consists of two extremes. Liberal and conservative one. When my mum, stepfather, grandma from the mother's side (Ania) are setting positive to me being a Brony, the grandma from father's side (Tosia), uncle and uncle godfather are very worried. When mum and stepfather said that I can have that big plushie, just I need to work hard on it (real work for real money, what else, luckily my stepfather works as alpinist and as a "bottom helper" I can earn money), Tosia states that those money would be better used if earned for driving license, for example. He really seems to be confused, why I like the "girly" show so much. Then, uncle godfather appears and quickly anger at me with: "About what bullsh*t are you talking!? What's the purpose of the such thing?" and uncle ends it with. "It's of course no mine decision, but if you want to buy this autism, then please don't regret spent money, nobody will refund it.". I can't argue with it, because factically I could spend money better, factically I could not buy this plushie and factically I couldn't get money back, if I magically would think that this is not pleasuring me enough, for example. I just want to be happy with myself and that's it. During those sentences were spoken, I was shortly after waking up (so, another reversal enquiry is that I said about that expensive and huge plushie day earlier, in the evening). That means I was really cutting off any discussion or argument by just simply not answering the questions and convering myself with bedding, while lying on mattress. I was hugging to my little plastic HappyMeal figure of Starlight and was wondering, how they could not possibly just accept the situation, that is presented in front of them? I just can't understand the question like "What's the purpose of this plushie?" "Goddamit!" - I said in mind - "Plushies are for making you happy and pleasured and fulfilled! It's so stupid question that I'm not going to answer it!". I was silently crying (tears were dropping on the pillow and figure), I just couldn't figure why the reaction was so negative. I was just only honest, as always, when it came to practiclly anything I do or I say. As an Asperger person I just couldn't accept the possibility of a threat. The threat of no money donations for occassions (birthday and others), because they could go for that plushie, so painful to me, becuse the dream would go away and away, if I woulnd't constantly work for real money myself. I, however, found a cheering up in grandpa from the father's side - Irek. He said, that he accepts the situation, I just need to work myself and earn money myself - which is of course fair and I can't argue. But the thing that family was behaving so not kind to me gived me bad chills. 3. Unhealthy obsession (or maybe it's not "unhealthy" but, just... obsession, without adjectives?) It's so obvious to diagnose me as a person obsessed with Starlight and partly with MLP. The amount of Starlight content I have in my nearest extened is at least high: -> 1200 pictures of Starlight (vectors, fanart) in my cloud, still rising -> Desktop pictures of Her on PC, Laptop, Tablet and Phone -> Chrome opening card with Starlight -> Having HappyMeal figure of Her, going to buy a plushie in the future -> Watched every single episode with Her (and no episodes without Her with exception of from S6 E3 to S6 E13) -> I can't watch Her being hurt or struggling very hard, that's the reason why I stopped watching from S8 E14 and I was dropping tears on S8 E13 (wonder why? I'm emotinally weak, I confess) -> Headcanons/Imaginary Episodes with her for few months straight, going to continue for many years and years later (no exaggeration, even if I'm Asperger, which means I have tendency to exaggerate) -> Open confession for admiring/adoring her -> I'm making drawings of Her -> Thinking of writing fanfic -> Talking about it and thinking of so many points/arrows However I'm not thinking that this is bad. However, is it bad for anyone else? I'm type of person, that likes to have people accepting the actual state, rather to argue with them, why they don't accept the state. I don't know. I just don't have in mind to poison people with content they don't like. If they would say directly "Please, I don't wish to watch you constantly talking or sending pics with your so freaking beloved Starlight, thanks", I would accept that request and stop talking about that with margin of error that I could blurt it at any moment. And I'm back to the point 1. - that friend didn't say anything like that, absolutely anything related to stop talking about MLP or Starlight, even once. So I don't know how to fell know after blocking him. Do I should fell positive by cutting off my dear friend or negative? It's a difficult question to answer since I don't have any objectival arguments for any side, only subjectival ones. 4. Final thoughts What could I say to myself? "Hey, you are a great person, you're unique, keep it that way."? "Don't care for others, who don't respect you and go ahead, don't care."? Or maybe "You are yourself, be free of limitations and nobody can stop you no matter what they are saying."? I'm like REEEEE when I'm conscious of being fanatic person and both wanting and not wanting to be fanatic further (I know arguments for both sides thought), when I'm a man without a soul, because someone makes me hurt, etc. I know it's bad (the behaviour to few individuals), but bizarrely enough, I want more and more of Starlight (rather not MLP as show, since I have some arguments to not watch them as often, as I had done, suggested by uncle [like repetitive and refreshing episodes, not-so-awesome writing resulting in cringy-to-cry moments and so on]), I fell fulfilled, when I see enough of her daily, like watching at least once a day a graphics of her on the Internet or on the disk or cloud or having a figure of her next to my laptop and to me all the time. Also, MLP community means to me a lot, that's why I'm writing my blog here and not in the other place. Also, I take Bronies and Pegasisters as seriously, as my family, in context of said words and advices. 4.1. Definition of being "toxic" To clear up what I call a "toxic" person, it's a person, which constantly ruins your life, because of its dumbness and not wanting to hear other people and/or have bad intentions to somebody. If your definition is different, fell free to share. Thanks for reading, give feedback, if you wish, I'll answer to it no matter of the conjugation. Note: I didn't make a detailed check for typos and misunderstoods. If you catch any of these, fell free to share, thanks.
  3. So yeah, anybody who uses internet nowadays knows that apart from all the good and bad stuff it provides, it also promises you the destructive force other people can bring through words in the package. I guess 99% of players (the remaining 1% are those who don't even care about interaction or reading) experienced toxicity in gaming this way or another. But what about the opposite? We all know that it's very easy to remember all the bad stuff that happens to us. Because it has an effect on us, it leaves a mark and has consequences at times. But do you remember any really positive moments coming from entire gaming communities, or the general feeling you've had from them? To give an example, real one so that you know this is not made up even though it'll be hard to believe. Lineage 2, back when it went Free-to-play from Pay-to-play system. This game has a very annoying questing system. In order to advance your character and "level up" your class, you need to finish a quest, which includes killing an enemy that took about... I don't know, 10-30 seconds to kill depending on class. Then, after it died, it took about 15 seconds or so for it to respawn. Obviously, since game went free-to-play, the place was SWARMING with people. The annoying part of quest was that only the person who landed LAST HIT on the mob was gaining the quest item required from it. So as you can imagine, playing an aspiring buffer, healer or tank might have been a pain there. But when I came to the place, I witnessed something I'd never have expected. I saw a line. Going for long metres. People standing and waiting their turn, and it just kept growing. It reached a point some of guys had to wait 1.5h to kill that mob. But barely anyone complained really. Most people understood that other classes will have it rough with so many others and 95% reached agreement that line won't hurt. And the ones who were waiting actually started engaging in meaningful conversations. Snowboarding, soccer, music, books, movies. People were just... talking. The same way you'd talk to your friend. I can bet many of them remained friends afterwards and probably joined same clans. And maybe it wouldn't be so weird, if not the fact that I went there out of curiosity for next two days. Since at night server time mob was free to kill, and everything would start anew next day. And... it repeated itself. Time after time. People were actually forming a line and waiting, day after day when necessary. They weren't clanmates, they weren't an alliance. They were just strangers, nothing more. This is something I am convinced I will never ever see again in any game. And I really miss that feeling. Sure, there were a few who wanted to break everything, but the line was actually guarding itself. Random people from line were PKing the disturbing ones, and nobody batted an eye while they were getting their Karma down on monsters to cease being a PK. And afterwards, they returned to their place in line and everything was fine. It's nothing unlike communities I see these days.
  4. what are some things you hate? i mean personally hate. i'm not talking about things that you are told to hate i'm talking about things that you personally hate and people might not think of you the same way again. but living in a world that emphasizes on "being yourself" we need some time casual vent. is there anything you fine toxic? pet peeves are allowed too. one thing i despise is what someone tries to start a conversation with you by telling you a trivial fact about something relating to what you are doing at that time. example. I would be talking about sleeping or spiders or any combination of the two and someone would say "did you know that you swallow 8 spiders a year in your sleep?" makes me die a little inside.
  5. Today i was experimenting with some VSTs and i came to this: http-~~-// Opinions??