Lines you'll never catch FIM characters saying.

[-Nobody- 514]

Spike: I'm not a useless character!

[Singe 2,109]

Applejack: I'm just going to stand over here in the background.

 

Pinkie Pie: Sorry, the baby shower is a no go. Rainbow Dash refused to pack the cloud with babies.

 

Rainbow Dash: I could get in trouble for this, but my history says otherwise.

 

Tree Hugger: Pollination is hot.

 

Twilight Sparkle: Time to rearrange my E-Books.

 

Fluttershy: This animal is too stupid by my standard.

 

Twilight Sparkle: I had the dream about the snake in my bed again.

 

Celestia: I guess I could let this slide, but everyone else really wanted to see the execution.

Edited December 21, 2015 by Singe

[Flying Vantas 106]

*RD drops object on hoof*

 

RD: HOT BELGIAN WAFFLES!! Wait, I'm alone, I can swear for real. *deep breath* SON OF A...

Hello fellow Gravity Falls fan ^-^

 

AJ: I BUCKIN' LOVE RAINBOW DASH AND I WANNA HUG 'ER AND KISS 'ER AND CALL HER GEORGE!

[Pinkiest Pie 405]

I can not see Derpy saying one thing "I just know what went wrong!"

[SilyGeny 369]

Any MLP character saying: Donald Trump should be president.

[cider float 2,535]

Tree Hugger: I smoke weed everyday

[Clarity 3,094]

Sunset Shimmer: *literally any line at all*

 

 

 

Because she'll never be in the actual show... geddit? *sobs grossly*

 

[Ohiobrony 1]

Rainbow dash: I can't wait to clear the skies today

Rarity: let's move to the farm sis

Twilight: fuck you celestial

Flutters: why r there so many animals in my house

Applejack: I'm a main character

Pinkie: weird al sucks

[Singe 2,109]

Applejack: We could try the masculinity way of showing our dominance by beating them into submission.

Rarity: That sounds barbaric and extreme.

Fluttershy: It's how animals in nature do it to resolve their issues. 

Twilight Sparkle: I guess we have no choice.

Rarity: You can't be serious?

Rainbow Dash: We'll break them down and build them back up.

 

Fluttershy: I would be the alpha of the group if I wasn't so timid.

 

Doctor: I'm sorry Rainbow Dash, but you'll be walking for the rest of your life.

Rainbow Dash: Nooooooooooooooo!

 

Daring Do: *Wakes up.* Yawn.

Rainbow Dash: Morning, Daring Do.

Daring Do: Ah! What are you doing in my house?

Rainbow Dash: I made you breakfast.

Edited December 24, 2015 by Singe

[Sidral Mundet 1,666]

Any character: Merry Christmas!

(At least within the show)

Edited December 24, 2015 by Sidral Mundet

[Summer Breeze 2,522]

Twily: i dont want to study, let me sleep!

Pinky: no party today? Finaly!

Fluttersht: rarity, could you take care od there pigs? I hate pigs!

Rarity: sure i'd take care of your dirty lil pigs! I love pigs! I'll let them play in my shop!

Rainbow: a new daring do book? I dont care

[Singe 2,109]

Rainbow Dash: Bite my flank!

 

Pinkie Pie: Come on. You know that I don't like it when you write offensive words on me with a permanent marker. Ms Cakes gets angry about it and makes me wash it off with that really hard brush.

 

Princess Celestia: Today, you've learned a very valuable less about something. I wouldn't know since I wasn't here.

 

Princess Luna: Time to take my anti-depressants.

 

Celestia: Cadance will you take Shining Armor as your husband?

Cadance: No.

*Shock*

Shining Armor: What? Why?

Cadance: I will not marry you, Shining Armor. You've lived with that shapeshifter for days and didn't bother to come rescue me. Your younger sister Twilight had to do it.

Shining Armor: I was under Queen Chrysalis spell.

Cadance: That's just an excuse because you're not good enough to be a unicorn or a stallion. We're through.

[cider float 2,535]

After the wedding.

 

Cadance: I've been stuck in that cave for months, you better prepare yourself for the first night on our honeymoon Shining Armor. ::wink::

Shining Armor: Gulp

[Singe 2,109]

Tirek has a crazy seizure when he sees the Mane 6 new bright multi-color schemes.

 

Rainbow Dash: It's been really hard keeping up with the other Pegasus.

 

Applejack: If you need someone to buck a couple of balls, I'm your gal.

 

Pinkie Pie: On the weekends, I hide in the ball pit to kidnap unsuspecting children.

 

Rarity: The rumors that I own a sweat shop in another country are just not true.

Edited December 27, 2015 by Singe

[cider float 2,535]

Big Mac: I feel so pretty oh ho ho ho.

 

Spike: Rarity you're so tense, how about you take a break and I'll massage your hooves. 

[Aurora Storm 83]

Rainbow Dash -  I'm scared of heights.

Rarity - It doesn't matter what you wear, just hurry about and pick something!

Twilight - I just can't get interested in this book

Fluttershy - I need an exterminator

Pinkie - I wish these ponies would get away from me and give me some space.

Applejack - Those chores can wait another day or two. I'm not in the mood.

[best poni 1,518]

Celestia: No, I don't want any cake Luna, you can eat all of it.

[That Guy with the CMB 5,869]

All of them: I love you, (another member of the mane six)

 

 

Take that and stuff it in your food hole, shippers. Just kidding, ILY.

[SilverStarApple 849]

Applejack: Ah hate apples. ...Ha, it's funny, cause Ah'm contradictin' mah usual characterization, even though tons of other posters have already made this dumb, lazy, cheap joke. Honestly, my writers are dumber than that glorified varmint Apple Bloom.

Pinkie Pie: Heeeyyy! Fourth wall jokes are only funny when I do them! And sometimes, they're not funny at all!

Fluttershy: Oh, but they are funny! And they're much funnier than that awful new show, Teen Titans Go. Oh, if I ever get my hands on those talentless hacks that call themselves scriptwriters, I'll snap their necks and force-feed them to Angel Bunny! ...Oh, but the network producers are probably at fault, too. More death for them, too!

[Sidral Mundet 1,666]

*Twilgiht's castle*

*Two guard ponies knock, Starlight Glimmer answers*

Starlight: Hello, how can I help you?

Officer 1: Are you Starlight Glimmer?

SG: Yes

*Officer 1 looks at Officer 2*

O2: We're here to inform you that you are wanted by the Equestrian Bureau of Investigation and to place you under arrest

SG: But wait, Princess Twilight forgave me!

O1: While Princess Twilight is much beloved, her title is honorary and as no legal authority when it come to matters such as what you are charged with Ms. Glimmer.

SG: There has to be some kind of mistake, I repented and cried and said I was sorry. That makes everything better right?!?

*O1 looks at O2 incredulously and falmpalms* 

O1: Just get the handcuffs Frank. It's going to be a long day. 

[Spanish In Physician 295]

Any character in MLP: Did you hear that Italian guy in the red hat at the next table?

[cmarston1 5,951]

Princess Luna:  Celestia you really need to go on a diet.

 

Apple Bloom: I wonder where Twist is.

 

Twist saying anything at all.

 

Scootaloo: Marry me Rainbow Dash!

 

Pinkie Pie: I need more pills!!!

[LOLTrainer13 7]

pinkie pie: *something about rocks and parties not being cool*

[Singe 2,109]

Rainbow Dash: After reading this more mature book, I find Daring Do books to be shallow and kiddish. -_-

 

Twilight Sparkle: After I get done reading a book series, I use a little forgetfulness spell so that I can read it like it was the first time. Sometimes I might also forget some other things.

 

Rarity: I'm just going to be straight with you. There is no way in all of Equestria that I can make a dress to cover that deluxe fat flank of yours. I might as well just drape a table cloth over that and call it a day. 

 

Cadance: Pinkie Pie, it seems you have trouble saying something. Let me help you. *Uses Magic Force Choke on Pinkie Pie*

 

Twilight Sparkle: You're both going to have a baby. So who's the mother? It's not Cadance since she doesn't have the belly.  Am I right?

 

Applejack: So why again do you only record me all dirty and eating a messy apple?

Apple Bloom: As I said, it's a project.

Edited January 1, 2016 by Singe

[LOLTrainer13 7]

any character: i have diabetes