Snowy & Violet 8 May 24, 2016 Share May 24, 2016 Hello! I'm new here and already in need of advice. I have a couple of OCs that need critiquing. I'll post the pictures first and the bios afterward. The first is Dusty Embers. This is not the best picture of him, but it's the only clear, full-body one I have! I'm not really worried about his looks but his bio and relations concern me. I figured he should be a wanderer, with little knowledge of his family. His talent obviously has something to do with fire, but I can't settle on the exact aspect(s) of his talent. Next we have Wild Winds. I'm not sure if she should be Dusty's cousin or just a close friend. Her talent is sky navigation, hence her cutie mark. I think she should be a Wonderbolt. Silver Blade is the colt in the last picture. He is a castle guard. He has a twin brother named Shadow Shield, who I failed to depict here. I don't really have a bio for him besides his having a brother and royal bloodline, his father being a king. My greatest concern comes with this final character, Wolfheart. She was formerly a werepony (I hope I'm spelling that right!), but she was able to overcome the darkness within her, hence her unique pattern. She was orphaned as a filly, left carelessly in the woods, and later adopted by Dusty, her brother of sorts, who helped her find her "talent," which is the curse of the werepony. She has a crush on Silver Blade. Everything about her concerns me. It's as if I didn't put enough thought into to her, or perhaps too much? Suggestions? Any help would be greatly appreciated! Thanks in advance! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Minty_The_Sweet 20 May 28, 2016 Share May 28, 2016 Your OCs are actually quite good. I really like the last one; wolf heart from the picture she strikes me as a curious and playful sort. Wolf heart is a good OC but maybe try to make more then her curse define her as a character like what her hobbies are? maybe she still carries a little bit of the wolf with her and she likes fetch. Also who are her friends? maybe she is friends with wild winds and they have a secret hoof shake. Your OC Dusty Embers looks really cool and slightly reminds me of a cowboy of some sort. Maybe his cutie mark can be about his untameable spirit and how it burns wild and brightly like fire. I can't give the best OC advice because I don't know exactly what you want but make sure that they can be relatable in some way and that they have weaknesses. Iv been making OCs since I first started playing games and looking back on them they were all mary sues but as I started reading more I found out what a good character is and slowly they became better and better. Always keep in mind that they are your OCs and that they are yours to shape into good strong characters. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Snowy & Violet 8 May 30, 2016 Author Share May 30, 2016 Your OCs are actually quite good. I really like the last one; wolf heart from the picture she strikes me as a curious and playful sort. Wolf heart is a good OC but maybe try to make more then her curse define her as a character like what her hobbies are? maybe she still carries a little bit of the wolf with her and she likes fetch. Also who are her friends? maybe she is friends with wild winds and they have a secret hoof shake. Your OC Dusty Embers looks really cool and slightly reminds me of a cowboy of some sort. Maybe his cutie mark can be about his untameable spirit and how it burns wild and brightly like fire. I can't give the best OC advice because I don't know exactly what you want but make sure that they can be relatable in some way and that they have weaknesses. Iv been making OCs since I first started playing games and looking back on them they were all mary sues but as I started reading more I found out what a good character is and slowly they became better and better. Always keep in mind that they are your OCs and that they are yours to shape into good strong characters. Thank you for the great advice! I really appreciate what you said about Wolfheart. I really felt like she was kinda sketchy, like she doesn't have a true talent or relatable character. Thanks again! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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