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health Is it easier for you to be Stubborn and Miserable?


VeroxVitrus

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Like the title says, do you find it much more easier to be Stubborn and Miserable rather than Open Minded and Happy? 

 

Personally, yes. Most of my reactions will end up coming across as negative and pessimistic due to the way I think and I try to not let others change the way I do things. It's very rare for me to have a happy reaction because I don't feel happiness a lot, sadness is a more contagious emotion than happiness as it can last longer than a smile.

 

Maybe because I'm getting older and the things that made my happy in the past no longer give me the same feeling they do now, or it could be the problems I had as a child that made me feel negative about everything. 

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Egh. I try hard to be positive and all so others can be but most people are too stubborn and cynical at times. It honestly makes it hard to appreciate them sometimes.

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Unfortunately, yes... I do my best to be positive, and I've become strong enough to put on a good attitude and look outwardly happy even in the worst of times, but there are many times when I feel like I could so easily collapse back into depression and stay there.

 

I think for a lot of people it's always easier to be miserable instead of happy, especially when your life isn't going all that great. But for me, I try to keep from letting myself fall back into that trap, because once I go there, it can be incredibly hard to get back out. And in the end, I prefer to be happy instead of miserable, even when the latter is the easier option.

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It's 50/50. At work, I'm a very negative person. I'll take issue with anything anyone does. If I fail at soemthign or miss out on something, I'll be stewing about it for a while. It's easy for me cause I'm an argumentative person. I'll debate anything. That usually leads me to finding the negative side of everything. Some people say I'm negative at times, while I point out that I'm being realistic. And stubborn? Yeah that's easier too. Cause giving up is harder, and you may not let yourself live it down that you quit. 

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Often, I might come across as someone who isn't positive at all, mostly when I am feeling immensely depressed. However, I actually try very hard to be as positive as I can be, so I try to keep my mind open. It seems though half of the time I tend to be depressed to an extent, despite my positive intentions. I would by far prefer to be positive all the time despite my own issues, but it is a mixture.

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I think it's easier for me to be miserable, yet open-minded.  I tend to think so negatively of myself but give others a chance.  I think it needs to be the other way around for once.

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Unfortunately, yes... I do my best to be positive, and I've become strong enough to put on a good attitude and look outwardly happy even in the worst of times, but there are many times when I feel like I could so easily collapse back into depression and stay there.

 

I think for a lot of people it's always easier to be miserable instead of happy, especially when your life isn't going all that great. But for me, I try to keep from letting myself fall back into that trap, because once I go there, it can be incredibly hard to get back out. And in the end, I prefer to be happy instead of miserable, even when the latter is the easier option.

Exactly this. 

When I was younger I had a hard time dealing with depression. It was the easier road than trying to fight my way out of it all the time. Eventually I found that self-pity was a trap; it's a way of gratifying myself with pity, but it also made me re-live and re-think all the stuff that made me upset, so it just kept recycling through my mind. That got to be a habit, and breaking any habit can be hard.

Once I started making a point of putting on a brave face and finding the good in things and doing good for others, even when it took an effort, I started forging new pathways in my brain, created positive habits and adopted a different outlook. If you look for the bad in anything, you will find it, whether it's really there or just imagined. But there is good everywhere. It just takes an effort sometimes to let it sink in, especially when you have a negative attitude. It's worth the effort to find the good though, that's where the real difference in life is found. 

Edited by Dreambiscuit
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I prefer to consider myself open-minded, but with a high respect for my morals. As for being stubborn and miserable, I usually regret rejecting others ideas and about 20 minutes after and try to accept it as best as I can (guilt). Either way, I think it's actually easier for me to be Open-minded and miserable. 

Edited by RealityPublishing
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Exactly this. 

When I was younger I had a hard time dealing with depression. It was the easier road than trying to fight my way out of it all the time. Eventually I found that self-pity was a trap; it's a way of gratifying myself with pity, but it also made me re-live and re-think all the stuff that made me upset, so it just kept recycling through my mind. That got to be a habit, and breaking any habit can be hard.

Once I started making a point of putting on a brave face and finding the good in things and doing good for others, even when it took an effort, I started forging new pathways in my brain, created positive habits and adopted a different outlook. If you look for the bad in anything, you will find it, whether it's really there or just imagined. But there is good everywhere. It just takes an effort sometimes to let it sink in, especially when you have a negative attitude. It's worth the effort to find the good though, that's where the real difference in life is found.

 

Well said. And above all, very true.

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I'd like to think I was neutral and open-minded in the past. I have depression, and I always has a passive attitude when it came to my personal life. I lived in a house with parental figures who would very often get angry with me for not doing things perfectly. I'd describe it as though I lived walking around eggshells. Other than that, I was pretty... happy? Alright? I was alright.

 

But now, since I've moved into a house full of people who... hate? Disagree? With each other constantly, and it's the household norm to talk shit about other members behind their back, or even to their face, I've noticed I've been getting more aggressive and close-minded about everything. Whereas before, I had to keep all my complaints to myself, and just shove down any negative attitude toward people deep inside to the point I just forget about it, now I'm hearing people openly complain about this and that and the other, and now they got me doing it. 

 

I don't like my new attitude, and I know that it's up to me to change it, but I feel stuck in the situation. I don't see how changing my attitude is gonna make the environment any less miserable.

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It's a mixed bag to me.

 

I try to do things my own way, and I'm not in a hurry to be affected by others. That being said, i do give others' ideas and interruptions a chance because, in the end of the day I'll blame only me for either misery or happiness.

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I'm pretty open minded, but I'm still miserable. 

 

 I'm honestly not 100% sure if happiness is even a thing anymore, because sometimes I put on a happy demeanor and act all positive despite feeling terrible, and it doesn't really make me feel any better on the inside. I've gone long whiles doing that and not feeling any better at all.

 

 Sure, I have moments of happiness, but actually "Trying" to be happy for longer periods of time when I don't feel like it doesn't help at all and is just exhausting.

 

 So, I'm not really stubborn. But it's easy for me to be miserable.

Edited by Base
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Absolutely.  Are you familiar with the show House?  I'm Dr. House in many ways, but take out the doctor.  It seems like I actually want to be miserable, even though that's completely opposite of the truth.  Making any kind of real change seems impossible.  Hardest of all is making a change to my outlook on life.  I want to be a cheerful, outgoing, happy person.  I want to be the kind of person who draws in other people and spreads smiles.  I want to be like Pinkie.  Instead, I'm a cold, shy misanthrope.  I want to change, but I just don't feel it inside.  I can't fake being happy when I feel horrible inside.  I just keep doing the same thing because being miserable seems easier.  It's familiar.  It's something I'm good at.  And just like House, I think I have a subconscious feeling that being miserable somehow makes me "better" than others, which I know isn't true at all.

 

"Being miserable doesn't make you better than everyone else.  It just makes you miserable."  -Dr. James Wilson

 

That quote from the show hit home hard.  I see so much of myself in House.  I want to change, but I don't know if it's really possible.

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How you appear to others is more of their point of view. Even though you don't think it others view you as stubborn and miserable. It's not easier to be stubborn and miserable it's more like it's better to just be yourself. If you find something boring then you simply state it's boring if others hate it when you find something boring they will probably call you stubborn and miserable, if you try to change yourself for those people and "act" open minded and happy than you're not being yourself are you? I simply think you finding something boring and people hating on you for finding it boring is those people's problems not mine.

Edited by cider float
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  • 3 years later...

It is easier to be miserably stubborn? Or being stubborn in being miserable? Like refusing to think positive. That is the question.

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