The Pinkamena Waltz [Manifest Psychosis]

[Vlazamal 334]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZnZraSHm_A

 

A little song I decided to put together. Enjoy!

[Courageous Thunder Dash 5,958]

Ok. It's a decent piece.

 

Perhaps the one thing you need to work on is completing a thought. Sometimes you interject things out of no where which leaves things hanging, which is a no-no in the orchestral realm. I see you were using a ton of diminished chords, which I definitely see why. Diminished chords are very useful in the more creepy and suspenseful type of pieces. When using a diminished chord, you can follow it up with a suspended 4th chord followed by the V. This way, you can smoothly transition to the next thought. This is the biggest thing that is causing your piece to lose it's effectiveness.

 

In terms of your instrumentation, make sure you don't have too many instruments playing the same thing. In the first section, where you had solo brass, a bell instrument and a type of piano play the arpeggiated section, it could use some low padding strings to give it that deep creepy feel. Your strings could use more quality, as they have a bit of a cut. The choir section kinda removed the creepy tone, especially with that added timpani. Be careful, as this can really change up your piece's focus.

 

All in all, this piece is a start, but in the end, it could use a ton of work. I'm always here if you don't understand some of the things I said.