slice of life Slice of life test

[Lightning Roller 158]

I'm currently working on a small slice of life story and I wanted to test the interest in the story to see if I should post my work so far. Here is a small excerpt:

 

    Manehattan became a very busy place as the night approached, the lights of taverns, clubs, and homes came on as Lightning made his through town. Ponies were out and about running errands, talking amongst friends, or heading into local bars to grab a drink. Lightning was walking along a sidewalk, about ten minutes from his house now, and made his way past one of his regular venues "The Tipsy Stallion," its dull blue neon sign giving off a low hum. 

    Lightning stopped and looked into the window of the building, noticing the stallion behind the counter. He was a middle-aged earth stallion with a faded tan coat and a mid-length salt and pepper mane. As lightning turned to walk down the road, he stopped and thought, "You know, a drink sounds really good right about now.." so he turned and pushed against the door, its worn wooden mass giving off an audible groan as it swung inward. The tan stallion behind the counter glanced up from the glass he had been cleaning and looked at lightning, realization dawning in his tired eyes. 

    "Well look who it is..." the stallion said, his low gravely voice giving off an inviting tone as the stallion let out a short chuckle. Lightning looked at the stallion and fixed his black and neon blue mane, his hair a mess from the wind. 

    "Hey Grizz, hows the old place doing?" lightning said as he smirked. The stallion shot lightning a look, his eyebrows raised in a "really?" manner.

    "She may be old, but she's gotten more action than you ever have." 

    Lightning looked away with a hunched head, attempting to hide his flustered face. "You didn't have to sink to that blow grizz, it's not my fault that mares can't handle this studly charm." he said in a half-hearted retort. Grizz rolled his eyes at lightning as he knocked a hoof on the counter, causing the empty glasses to clink in a mini chorus as he let out a gruff laugh. Other ponies in the room looked up from their drinks and conversations, a quizzical look on their faces as they eyed the pair of stallions with interest.

     "So I hear your making a name for yourself lightning, Your still gonna come and play for me every once in a while right?" Grizz grabbed a glass from the counter as he spoke, giving the glass a good once-over with the towel that wastucked into his shirt pocket.

[RealityPublishing 323]

@@Lightning Roller, it's looking pretty good right now (quite a few Grammar issues). I think with a bit more work, it can be published without a doubt. 

 

Just a quick, personal question for my understanding: Is Slice of Life just a story without the Mane6?  

[Hazard Time 1,127]

Just a quick, personal question for my understanding: Is Slice of Life just a story without the Mane6?  

 

Slice of Life implies a sort of realistic fiction where the characters endure relatable, everyday conflicts, such as relationships, family, work, etc.

 

Other than that and a few grammar errors, I'm curious to see where this goes 

[Lightning Roller 158]

@@Lightning Roller, it's looking pretty good right now (quite a few Grammar issues). I think with a bit more work, it can be published without a doubt. 

 

Just a quick, personal question for my understanding: Is Slice of Life just a story without the Mane6?  

It's my intention to keep it a simple slice of life. I'm not opposed to the mane 6 making cameos, but I'm trying to avoid it. It can be hard to write in characters that already are incredibly solid and are so iconic amongst the fandom. Trying to make sure the characters manerisms, speech patterns, and how they handle themselves are true and accurate to canon can be really difficult. Where as using uncommon background ponies, locations, as well as creating my own give me the freedom to write comfortably and take a few more risks. I would appreciate some help with the grammar, as I've run it through spell-checking and minor punctuation issues already.

[RealityPublishing 323]

 I would appreciate some help with the grammar, as I've run it through spell-checking and minor punctuation issues already.

I'd be happy to help with editing and proofreading. I've done quite a bit of it in my time! Just PM me a Google Doc (or some other text containing document) and I can figure something out!

[Lightning Roller 158]

I'd be happy to help with editing and proofreading. I've done quite a bit of it in my time! Just PM me a Google Doc (or some other text containing document) and I can figure something out!

That would be fantastic! I would really appreciate some help with this. 

[Regal Shadow 825]

Cool! You're a great writer! Great Job!