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Advice for my OC?


Cosmic Breeze

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Howdy, everypony!  Anyway, I wanted to ask if anyone could give me their input on my OC, Cosmic Breeze.  He has already been accepted in the EqE RP section, but I remember some people on the Discord chat saying that Cosmic Breeze sort have has two cutie marks.  I'm not sure if it's how I described it, or if that actually is the case and I didn't realize.  Any advice on that would be appreciated!

 

The link to my OC is in my signature!  And if there's any other advice for him, feel free to tell me!  I love constructive criticism!

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Hey @@Cosmic Breeze,

 

I say you have a pretty respectable OC, the kind that would fit quite naturally into the cannon world, which is very nice. Here are some things I noticed that could improve or clarify your character:

 

- You say he is average height, but I would say he is a little taller than usual based on your drawing. Having him a little taller for some reason makes more sense to me from a character perspective, though I can't really explain why.

 

- on you cutie mark: I think you can make your cutie mark work if you modify your thinking slightly. rather than having the wind be behind the galaxy, you could make it part of the arms of the galaxy if you mark includes a shape similar to this on the arms of the galaxy:

 

 

 

gust-clipart-ncEX6erAi.png

 

 

 

-What is your OC's profession? If he is living on his own he needs a job (perhaps an astronomer for the royal science academy, etc.)

 

-Your OC is from the south, so probably Appleloosa? going off the equestria map

 

- your picture is perfectly serviceable, but if you can consider getting a commission or trying your own hand at drawing him. This will allow you to have a little more unique look.

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Hey @@Cosmic Breeze,

 

I say you have a pretty respectable OC, the kind that would fit quite naturally into the cannon world, which is very nice. Here are some things I noticed that could improve or clarify your character:

 

- You say he is average height, but I would say he is a little taller than usual based on your drawing. Having him a little taller for some reason makes more sense to me from a character perspective, though I can't really explain why.

 

- on you cutie mark: I think you can make your cutie mark work if you modify your thinking slightly. rather than having the wind be behind the galaxy, you could make it part of the arms of the galaxy if you mark includes a shape similar to this on the arms of the galaxy:

 

 

 

sig-4827640.gust-clipart-ncEX6erAi.png

 

 

 

-What is your OC's profession? If he is living on his own he needs a job (perhaps an astronomer for the royal science academy, etc.)

 

-Your OC is from the south, so probably Appleloosa? going off the equestria map

 

- your picture is perfectly serviceable, but if you can consider getting a commission or trying your own hand at drawing him. This will allow you to have a little more unique look.

 

Hey, thanks a lot!  I did try my best to ensure that he would fit into the canon world.

 

- Ah, yes, I can see that!  It's kind of hard to get the height right in the Ponymaker thing though.  I suppose I could be more specific and say he's the average stallion height?  I'm not exactly sure if stallions are generally a bit taller than the mares.

 

- That actually makes a whole lot of sense for the cutie mark!  I can't believe I didn't think of that!  Thanks so much for that!  :squee: 

 

- Hmm, is the royal science academy in Ponyville?  Or is that in Canterlot?  I was thinking, perhaps Cosmic doesn't get his dream job just yet in Ponyville, so he may be working at a library or bookstore instead at first.  He likes books probably as much as Twilight does, but maybe that'd be a bit extreme.   :yay: 

 

- Yeah, I was thinking maybe Appleloosa.  I just wasn't so sure, heh.  I'm not sure if I should give Cosmic an accent or not.  I mean, he does have a slight southern one, I suppose.

 

- True!  I was thinking of commissioning someone.  I know if I tried drawing, it wouldn't come out right at all.  Plus, drawing isn't my cup of tea. :kindness: 

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