Redeem Your 'Self' ZethaPonderer

[ZethaPonderer 2,199]

My Favourite Mane 6 Pony

How did you find MLP Forums?

Other

How you became a fan of My Little Pony

Not officially a fan of the show... yet. Originally an anti-brony, but became conflicted and overburdened with guilt as the years went by. I came to redeem myself.

---

Hello. My name is ZethaPonderer. I come in peace and signed in the MLPforum to introduce and express myself.

Don't worry it's not going to be 'too personal' or anything like that. At least not yet. It's complicated. OK.

I just want to say to all you MLP fans (aka mostly grown men and women) that those who just like the show for what it is, you're alright in my book based on what I've experienced so far.

I really wish I was joking throughout all this, like this is all a bad dream I'm having. Signing up in an MLP forum website to express myself of the wrongdoings I've done. Perhaps the guilt is eating me alive and the only way to get rid of this guilt is for me to redeem myself by saying I'm sorry to not only the sane and rational fans of MLP Gen 4, but to the show itself.

If you have not encountered an anti-brony that would feel sorry for his/her actions then allow me to give me a chance to be one of the anti-bronies who felt remorse for his actions and was willing to have the guts to seek redemption in some way which is pretty strange if you think about it. I hated the show, but not the fans of the show for the most part since I know that fandoms in general ruin everything.

I lost it haven't I? For a show made for 5 year old girls it really gave me some serious psychological turmoil.

Maybe I just couldn't stand this show nor this franchise for what it was and what Gen 4 was trying to teach. But after sifting through some episodes and watching reviews of what MLP fans have to say about the show, I get it now.

This is a franchise that has redeemed itself for all its failures in the previous generations (except the First One). The first generation from the 80s started out modest. Although it isn't anything special when cartoons of this time all had unnecessarily dark and edgy atmospheres to them. However, it's the later generations till Gen 3.5 which IMO were so terrible that I'm willing to believe it must not have been made for children in mind. More like aliens pretending to entertain children.

Gen 4 was a special case indeed for the MLP franchise since it revived what was already a dead-beaten horse and brought life into it. I hate to say it, but I can't admit that whenever I watch this show and tries to hamfist you with "friendship" lessons at the end of each episode I'm reminded immediately of Sesame Street. This show is the Sesame Street for the Millennial Generation.

I'll post further, but this is as far as I can reply. I'm sorry, it's just too much for someone like me to do something as crazy as this. I feel like I'm going mentally insane. I need to rest and ponder further about this moral dilemma.

[Maple Bat 3,568]

Hey man it's ok this comunity has a motto Love and tolerate and no hater is excluded. It's very intersting that you overcame(strong way of putting it I think) being anti-brony just by watching it. 

I appreciate you trying the show and if you still don't like it that is perfectly fine. However if you keep watching the show and you keep enjoying it there's nothing wrong with you. The Shows a bit "Sesame street" as you put it at first but it's more interesting as it goes on.

To generalize my post Apology accepted my friend.

[Rawzy 1,302]

 

I think a good handful of us thought that bronies were weird at some point in our lives, but if you look past all of the stereotypes and riff raff that society has put on us fans, then appreciating the show for what it is is easy. I remember before I watched the show I was a big anti-brony, I was like you, I couldn't understand, I thought that everyone who watched the show had some kind of mental disability, and I know many more that were just like me. Yea it might feel weird and wrong to go from hating bronies to being involved in a community of them, but then once you see how normal everyone is, and how accepting the community is, it's hard to leave aha.

[Soul Flare 403]

Worry not, I've personally met several anti-bronies who've changed their mind after actually watching the show, and that includes myself. When the brony fandom first started out, I hated it. With a burning passion, I might add. I clinged to sterotypes and things such as Pony Thread Simulators to further confirm the idea that bronies were weird and terrible people.

That was untill I actually started watching the show myself and became involved in some brony communities such as these forums only to be proven wrong. While none have signed up claiming that they wanted to 'redeem themselves' as you did, I've witnessed many introduction threads of people who stated to be former anti-bronies. In fact, I'm sure most of us would have laughed at the idea of becoming fans of My Little Pony of all franchises before actually becoming so. It's relatively normal.

That being said, welcome to the forums if you decide to stick around. As you've changed your opinion on us, consider yourself redeemed. None here will hold your past against you.

[Floofie 799]

Don't beat yourself up, man. No one here will hold anything that you said or did in the past against you. I appreciate that you gave the show a chance and that you want to redeem yourself, and I'm sure everyone else feels the same way. You're not going insane, you're being a good person.

Welcome to the forums, by the way. I hope you end up liking FiM.

[Le Trotteur Sauvage 13,051]

Hellooooooo Zetha !!!
Welcome to the forum ! You'll see you'll enjoy yourself here ! Lots of crazy cordial people ponies    !!!
If you're looking for friends and/or fun you've come to the right place, if you have any question/request feel free to message    !!!

[ZethaPonderer 2,199]

Ok I'm back after that rest and wow. Did not expect this so thank you all who were nice in this post. Sorry for all the 'mud-trotting' as you people might put it, but I'm sorry I just have to get it out of my system so can this post be considered an exception? But it would still be the right thing to do in my case since I just need to vent and get this guilt out of my system through expression. And what crazy and better way to express and vent than on an MLP forum. 

I personally have always thought that not just the Brony Fandom, but even the sane and rational fans of the show were 'ALL' hypocrites. Plus simultaneously zoophiliacs and pedos aka cloppers to some extent. They never practiced what they preach which was "Love and Tolerate". I'm willing to believe that after seeing through all the hype and craze this fandom went through for the past 5 years that it's impossible to "Love and Tolerate" and instead "Hate and Intolerate". Yeah you can tell that I really wasn't rationally sound back then. So I started learning Logic and the Fallacies I've committed over the many years of my life.

Wouldn't "Respect and Tolerate" be a better mantra for the Brony Fandom to live with? Seems more rational and doesn't go off of extreme emotional roller coaster rides nor tangents. Plus it's in tune with what the actual show is all about. The show never emphasized the "Love" part when it comes to Tolerance. But, it does show the Main 6 characters learning how to tolerate each other and respect one another despite their opposite personalities, likes/dislikes, beliefs (possibly), and what they stood for.

Tartarus, even the main characters I hated vehemently in the show (especially Rainbow Dash) I respect them and tolerated them with what they stood for.

Love is strong, but can be abused. Hate is also strong, but can also be abused. They both are such extreme emotions IMO that its better to separate yourself from such emotions that can lead to your death. Sure Respect is something you must earn, but with respect you can either choose to love or hate. Hitler is hated, but he's also respected for what he stood for as hard as it may be for a lot of people to imagine. Pharaoh was a hated figure in the Abrahamic religions but he was respected by many during his time.

I've seen the Saberspark's documentary "Ballad of the Brony" a few years ago where he does mention the origin story of this 'Fandom' and apparently it started at 4chan. Naturally, I wanted to stop the video after hearing that since I have maintained a firm belief that anything that comes from 4chan can NEVER be a good thing, but I kept the video going just to understand the 'hypocrisy' this fandom is apparently drenched in during those past years.

It took me so many months to realize that it was just the minorities within the Brony Fandom that are hypocrites while the rest are just indifferent. I made a vow to myself that if I ever become a Hypocrite I would kill myself, but then I begin to ask "Can I still redeem myself of my failures if I do succumb to hypocrisy? If I do, would I be free from the hypocrisy within me?". The irony behind all this is that I've become a hypocrite without even realizing it myself being an anti-brony and doing whatever I can to s*yay*t all over this Fandom and give it the 'Bad' name that it deserves in my eyes during those times.

What an utter delusional fool I was. I was blinded with my own hatred for you all which caused me to be filled with guilt. It ruined my sanity. I struggled in college. I had to get psychological therapy after going through all this madness seeking answers for my wrongdoings.

You really think I'm joking after making such a post like this, then you simply put don't understand my vent and frustration which is all 100% genuine. Nothing about all this is fabricated in the slightest. I'm speaking directly with what my heart dictates throughout all this and realized that I'm the monster not the fandom.

I'm tired for now during my 2nd post here, and will post my final reply for my experience of MLP Gen 4 tomorrow. What did I like? Dislike? Respect? All that other stuff and I can finally be free and rest from this guilt that ruined a part of my well-being that I'll never recover.

Edited May 30, 2017 by ZethaPonderer

[Totally Nyx 36,053]

 

Hello Zetha and welcome to MLP Forums! I doubt anyone will hold it against you what you did or didn't do in the past. What matters is who you are, not who you were. If you choose to stick around, I hope you enjoy your time here, and if you have any questions about anything, feel free to ask me anytime.

[ZethaPonderer 2,199]

On 5/30/2017 at 4:32 PM, Totally Lyra said:

 

Hello Zetha and welcome to MLP Forums! I doubt anyone will hold it against you what you did or didn't do in the past. What matters is who you are, not who you were. If you choose to stick around, I hope you enjoy your time here, and if you have any questions about anything, feel free to ask me anytime.

While I appreciate the sentiment, it is necessary in my case to self-reflect my wrongdoings and have the nerve to admit them out. We must learn from our wrongdoings in the past in order to survive in the present and forge for a bright future.

As for the rest of the people that have replied to my post, well I have nothing to say other than you all deserve a like (or "brohoofs") for your points were valid and were all nice and respectful with where I was coming from. 

Now then, time to get it off my chest by stating my experience overall for MLP: FIM. Please note, this is my experience and I've only watched and saw the reviews of the show all the way from Season 1-3 so I have no say on the matter for what I think about the later seasons since I haven't given them proper time for me to think about them. This is going to be a loooonnnnng post, but better to get the guilt out now then never (also I'm going to bold out the important points just so you guys can skim through my final post hopefully easy). 

Introduction:

It was 2012, and the MLP hype was spreading all across the world. I decided to check it out and find out a lot of people who claim themselves fans of this cartoon MLP: FIM, were exasperating the awesomeness of this cartoon. How amazing the characters were, the world-building, the visuals, the design. These fans wouldn't stop so out of curiosity I gave it a chance while also watched reviews of the First 3 Seasons of the show to get the gist of the hype. That and the Anonymouses of 4chan making such a stink out of the cartoon all over the internet by perverting it for the ignorant masses (aka clopping to it).

I did some research and found out Lauren Faust made this which is pretty cool since I've seen her previous cartoons, especially Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends. But, she really didn't feel like she was in charge of making Foster's IMO since Foster's along with Powerpuff Girls were all Craig McCracken's creations (and yes I know these two are a married couple). I don't know, maybe Lauren did help out in some way with Foster's and PPG, but I just don't see what she contributed exactly. Which is what makes MLP: FIM an interesting case since this is Lauren's own creation and she's in charge. Cool and Tara Strong was in it? The voice actress of both Timmy Turner from Fairly OddParents and Bubbles from PPG? This might be interesting after all since these two were a part of my childhood and I did watch these shows. With Foster's I was fine, but with PPG I had mixed opinions on that particular cartoon though it was still a great cartoon in its own right. I gave MLP:FIM a shot while doing everything I can to avoid the fanatics of the show perverting it. Please note, I don't have any nostalgic connection to the MLP Franchise so this is as unbiased as you can get, though I did do some research on the previous generations as well in advance to at least understand the hype of what makes MLP: FIM such an overhyped misunderstood cartoon for its time.

Season 1:

Started out like if Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends meets Sesame Street. I know a lot of fans find the First Season of the Show pretty boring and meh, but is it just me or does it have that Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends vibe to it? The "hamfisted" friendship lessons was annoying, but acceptable since this is a show made for 5 year old girls. All in all, I didn't have much to say about the First Season that it started out just as modest as the 1980s MLP cartoon. I can see now that there was some actual thought put into this cartoon and not just a show mindlessly made to be a cheap cash grab like the previous generations (except the First One to some extent).

Gotta admit, the world-building, character interactions/personalities and visuals are definitely the icing on this already great looking cartoon. The only problem I have throughout this entire show are the character designs of the ponies. They barely even look like ponies. Where's their snout like an actual real life horse/pony? Why they got long looking necks? More like a dog and giraffe mated or a cat giving birth after having sex with a camel to create this hybrid creature that any sane person would call an abomination. At least the First Generation of MLP looked like actual ponies so this design choice although weird at first glance really sticks out like a sore thumb. The technicolor look of the show gave me an eyesore, but it's to be expected since it's what made the previous generations stood out.

Furthermore, the character designs just look the 'same' making it come across as cheap. Let me explain this so I don't come across as offensive or racist towards horses, but it would've been nice if the main 6 characters looked 'bodily' different from one another than just having the same proportional average looking mare-bodied ponies that is overused all the time in the show. Seriously, if you can only see black n white, remove the manes and tails, would you still be able to tell all the ponies apart in this show? Sure some of them got horns, wings, different eyes, and some of them have freckles but that can only get you so far. I just wish there was more emphasis on the character design. I know this is also a problem with the previous generations, but honestly this should've been addressed a long time ago. Why can't some ponies look short? Why can't some ponies look muscular? Why can't some ponies look really skinny? Why can't the Mane 6 looked different from each other to have more visual appeal and detail? Why can't we have both unique looking ponies with unique personalities? Would've made the show stand out just a little more if you ask me.

Overall, Season 1 had a mediocre start, but then again it has that Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends vibe to it while bearing the Sesame Street touch to it.

Season 2:

The character designs issue was sort of addressed, but with a major tease IMO. I know that Celestia and Luna had unique designs, but that's to be expected since they had to be due to their status. But, you know one thing I really noticed odd about this that I never caught in Season 1 and finally did in Season 2, is that the side characters had far more unique looking pony designs. Such as Bulk Biceps, Shining Armor, Cadence, Mr. and Mrs. Cake, Derpy (if you can count her unique though idk), that pony who had a donut as his tramp stamp (aka Cutie Mark *shudder*) from the episode Mmmystery on the Friendship Express. Too bad they all lack personalities for me to give a dn.

Also, is it just me or do the male characters of the show have far more unique looking designs while most of the female characters look the same? I wish I was making this up, but upon further inspection it does seem to be the case (at least from Season 1-3 that is).

First half of Season 2 started out pretty cool. I did like Discord as a character and had a unique design to boot. Truth be told, I never watched Star Trek nor Star Wars nor any franchise that had anything to do with Stars as the title. Idk, it just didn't appeal to me. Which is a shame as Discord's voice actor is pretty cool. It's like he doesn't belong in this universe which is actually a faithful adaptation to how the First Generation's villains were portrayed. Yes I did watch the very first episode of the 1980s MLP cartoon and the villains were definitely the best part about that saccharine mess of a show.

Unfortunately, my enjoyment didn't last for too long as I found out Lauren Faust stepped down from taking any charge in running MLP: FIM which was one of the main reasons I watched this and this is very apparent from this episode "Putting your Hoof Down" which is the Second Half of the 2nd Season that things slowly begin to downhill for me IMO. I hate this episode, it negatively portrays that all shy characters (in this case Fluttershy) are demented anti-social psychopaths who start bullying others when they taste the power of "assertiveness" which is totally not true in the slightest since those are the minorities. Never have I wanted to kill a fictional character such as Fluttershy for doing something stupid. At least Hurricane Fluttershy and Stare Master weren't so bad, but unfortunately the former came out too late for me to give a crap thanks to Putting Your Hoof Down while the latter just made Fluttershy come across as a creep. Shame though, cause I was just starting to like this character.

Not much to say at all about Season 2, except it was a mixed bag and since Lauren was no longer in charge of the later season, I still moved to see what kind of changes this would mean for MLP: FIM. Boy, was I in for a wild ride when I gave Season 3 a shot.

Season 3:

It was Rushed, Poorly Executed, and felt more like the Bronies (and cloppers to some extent) have finally infiltrated this show to pervert it for the target demographic and also the ignorant masses. This whole season did not know who their target audiences were anymore. It still had that Foster's vibe to it, but the Sesame Street aspect of the show is all screwed up. Hated the episode where they have to bring back Discord due to fan demand, hated the musical finale episode of Season 3 where the Mane 6 characters Cutie Marks were swapped and the fact that Twilight Sparkle suddenly became an alicorn. I just got used to Unicorn Twilight and the fact that Discord was turned to stone in the 2nd Season, have mercy MLP: FIM . For an Anti-Brony like me, this was the tipping point and I just couldn't stand this show anymore. It was too much for me to even comprehend. This is why I hated the Fandom. This is why I lost my dn mind and whatever was left of my sanity. I went out on a crusade to st all over this Fandom for ruining both MLP: FIM and endorsing the Equestria Girls franchise. Fk the first movie and the sequels. Ponies in Human Form? What were Hasbro even smoking when they came up with this?

Did not bother watching the later Seasons afterwards because thanks to Season 3 it's all screwed up, rushed, and felt like a cheap cash grab. Just like the previous generations of MLP which is a shame as it didn't start out that way on Season 1 as far as my memory tells me.

Edited June 2, 2017 by ZethaPonderer

[ZethaPonderer 2,199]

Conclusion:

It was a wild wild ride, and I don't know what to feel anymore. My hatred got the best of me and it ruined a part of my life (also sanity) I'll never recover. I just feel like I don't want to associate myself to MLP: FIM nor to the Fandom anymore. At least I tried, at least I tried... to understand the madness. Unfortunately, it costed me a lot of my mental and spiritual health.

It doesn't matter which pony I like anymore cause they all look the 'same' to me, but I'll at least give off my personal opinion on the Mane 6 in terms of personality,

Twilight Sparkle: Mixed Feelings. I want to like Twilight due to Tara Strong playing this character, but her character is boring and doesn't appeal to me. I expected more out of Tara with this role just like her previous voice actress roles of Timmy Turner and Bubbles. Pretty disappointing if you ask me and Lesson Zero didn't change my mind. If anything it just made her come across just as much of a creep as Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie. I do like her being a studious character like Blossom from PPG, but that's about it. Also, is it just me or does Twilight's voice sounds strangely similar to the episode from Samurai Jack "Jack and The Flying Prince and Princess". I swear the Princess in this Samurai Jack episode sounds exactly like Twilight Sparkle. Seriously Tara, did you even try to give Twilight Sparkle a unique voice? I expected better from you. Maybe she forgot she voice acted in Samurai Jack, who knows so I'll cut her some slack.

Rarity: Neutral. Just don't like her ladylike personality, but she's not THAT bad of a character. Most of the episodes that center around her I hate to admit are actually pretty good. I strangely liked Suited for Success. She's surprisingly the more interesting ponies among the Mane 6.

Applejack: Probably my least hated pony among the Mane 6, but that doesn't say much. Too bad she doesn't do much and just stays in the background half of the time. And maybe it's the fact that she's a background pony I find very funny and charming about Applejack. Ironically, it's what I like about Applejack.

Fluttershy: I find her a very creepy pony, and her voice doesn't help much. She reminds me of my naive innocent child 'self' which I hate. But, despite her creepiness, she wasn't THAT bad of a character to me initially, until I found out in Putting Your Hoof Down she's a demented anti-social psychopath.

Rainbow Dash: Hate her in the first episode, and hate her even more. I just hate the typical arrogant jocks with a "heart of gold" personality. Arrogant people like her deserve to be made fun of if they start showing off or proving how 'awesome' they are in whatever.

Pinkie Pie: She's probably my 2nd hated pony next to Rainbow Dash due to her being just as creepy as Fluttershy (that episode where she stalks Cranky Doodle Donkey *shudder* stranger danger) and I just don't like her party-going personality. Plus, I know the fourth wall breaking Pinkie Pie does, but this is reminiscent of the cartoons from the 1940s-1960s. So everytime she does it, it just makes me wish I was watching cartoons from the 40s-60s where animators went nuts into making their cartoon characters do whatever they want.

I said my peace, my guilt has been overcome and I can finally rest in peace. Now I must leave. I don't know if I'll ever make a comeback. What do you all think? Sorry I just had to vent. It was the only way for me to get rid of the guilt. But hold no punches if you think something about my line of reasoning doesn't make sense and who knows I might address it further.

Deep down, I did wanted to like MLP: FIM, from all this nitpicky and harsh experience I shared to you all. I guess some people are destined to never truly understand that one thing in their life no matter how hard they try.

Just splitting my post into two separate replies to make it cohesive. Now I leave. Bye.

[Kenshiro 13,493]

Hello @ZethaPonderer , nice to meet you. Welcome to forums. I hope you get use to our community as soon as possible and i am sure that you ll meet lots of ponies there. If you wish to ask or talk about anything, i ll be around. See ya..   

[Rikifive 24,190]

Hello there!

That's true every fandom may be annoying, if you're not with them, so it's understandable. Either way - your past is not today, so it's all okay.  
It's also okay if you'll not like the show and decide to leave - nobody is forcing you to join that herd and obviously you can't like everything, so it's really up to you.

 

I'd like to comment on one thing though-

On 1.06.2017 at 4:14 AM, ZethaPonderer said:

The only problem I have throughout this entire show are the character designs of the ponies. They barely even look like ponies. Where's their snout like an actual real life horse/pony? Why they got long looking necks?

Personally I think that's the best thing in the show, that they're cute and stuff. No matter how silly it sounds. 
Making it more real? Maybe they also should make them unable to talk and put horse neighs instead? That would be entertaining.  

I'm not hiding, that many entities in our world look... not really friendly. Honestly, I'd rather question myself 'Why real ponies don't look like in the show?'.The way the show shows the world is a really nice and positive touch, so I would like to keep it that way. I definitely prefer leaving real life stuff for real life.

Of course, don't get me wrong, I'm not judging anything. It's just the way I see it - I respect your point of view.

 

Well, I'm not sure if you'll decide to stay, but at least for now - Welcome to the herd!  

Edited June 6, 2017 by Rikifive