Would you kiss Celestia's butt to dodge a prison sentence?

[KillerKingBakudan 702]

You're convicted of a felony in Equestria (regardless if you actually did it or not), and Celestia is about to incarcerate you in a filthy dungeon for who knows how long. You'd be losing so many years, and needless to say, your life will be in shambles by the time you get out.

But because you're a first-time offender, Celestia makes you an offer. If you want to avoid prison time, you'll have to kiss her butt in front of every pony in Canterlot. Yes, I do mean that literally. And that's both cheeks, for no less than one minute.

If you decide to go through with it, it will become front page news first thing in the morning. And every pony WILL remember you as the bum who kissed the Princess' royal ass to avoid punishment. You'll be Equestria's biggest laughing stock for generations, and no matter how hard you try, the chances of you making any new friends will be slim to nil.

Do you think this humiliation will be worth keeping your life together?

Oh, and each day you spend in prison thinking it over, you hear rumors that Celestia's been dramatically increasing her intake of beans and dairy products. It doesn't sound like the procedure will be very clean.

Edited August 7, 2017 by KillerKingBakudan

[Guest]

Celestia fans will see it as a two-for-one I'm sure! 

I wouldn't. I'd serve my time. If I've already been convicted of a crime there's a good chance a normal life is no longer on the table anyway.

Edited August 7, 2017 by Guest

[Mirage 24,135]

Yes - I'd kiss both cheeks then pet her incredibly cute nose.

[Kyoshi Frost Wolf 40,283]

This is an odd question with weirdly specific details. I think with the extra added details stacked upon it, give me the prison sentence. At least then I could possibly leave the prison one day like a champ. Or I would go insane, one of the two.  

[They call me Loyalty 1,941]

I'd like to lick her cutie mark too, if only as a sign of my utter submission to her royal highness.

[LunarShadow 397]

I would be a man and serve my time. I am already up shits creek as it is so there is no reason to take it to a literal extent. At the very least I would still have my dignity rather than be known as the coward of Equestria that grotesquely kissed ass in front of the nation to avoid my sentence. Complete humiliation in front of the country like that would not do any good for getting my life back in order.

Edited August 7, 2017 by DayShadow

[Krashface 534]

Cutie Mark or butt cheek ?

[Hierok 11,829]

I would kiss, but not in the middle. 

[BastementSparkle 20,312]

I would have said yes, originally, actually. But with all your very specific added details...No, I think I'd rather go to the dungeon at that point.

[Knightgem 158]

Couldn't I just hug'em? I'd end with a kiss on both Sun butt cheeks of course. A minute kiss is a long time to have your eating hole pushed up against the rear end.

[GrimGrimoire 4,970]

Every time I think I have hit bottom with the absurdity of some of these threads... someone throws me a shovel. Oh well....

I would not kiss Celestia on the mouth much less the ass.

I bet pony dungeons are not that fitly.... and if it was truly bad I could surely craft an escape. It is not like the guards are all that competent at their jobs.

[Libra 11,690]

Uhh, no. There is no punishment celestia can come up with that's worth me publicly embarrassing myself.

[Props Valroa 26,039]

Don't see why not honestly.

[Lunar Echo 10,334]

Here is how you tell the Celestia Lovers from the Non-Celestia Lovers haha, I am not sure, I mean, Prison is where your problems start not heal. You go into prison and come out either an even bigger more committed criminal or prison eats you up and spits you out a shell of your former self, it's not a place to be. I'd probably just kiss the Princesses butt, I really wouldn't survive in a Prison environment, and having a criminal record I'd imagine is a lot worse than been known for kissing a Princesses butt.

[Colt 45 148]

I don't see why not. Being in a prison like that for years is an extremely harsh price to play and would likely permanently damage me and would be very miserable. I also don't really care too much of what others think of me too much and there are many more humiliating punishments than this. Also, everyone would likely not care about it much after some time has passed and the humiliation will have died down significantly. I would much rather be humiliated and be the centre of attention for a little while, than be in sheer misery for years.

[Celli 4,332]

This question seems just a bit inappropriate.

[CT-1138 3,180]

I'd kiss between the cheeks if it meant a full pardon. 

[Tilgoreth 1,915]

Since when is kissing a white hot ass a punishment? Also there would have to be at least one pervert who looked at you as a hero. So yeah win-win.

[stripper 252]

I'm ready to pucker up ♥

[LunarShadow 397]

21 hours ago, Lunar Echo said:

Here is how you tell the Celestia Lovers from the Non-Celestia Lovers haha, I am not sure, I mean, Prison is where your problems start not heal. You go into prison and come out either an even bigger more committed criminal or prison eats you up and spits you out a shell of your former self, it's not a place to be. I'd probably just kiss the Princesses butt, I really wouldn't survive in a Prison environment, and having a criminal record I'd imagine is a lot worse than been known for kissing a Princesses butt.

I would be willing to wager that the correction facilities in Equestria probably are not all that bad given the nature of Equestria and its benevolent leaders. It may actually focus on reforming behavior and you may come out of it a better person.  

Edited August 8, 2017 by DayShadow

[shadowwarp940 1,302]

I'd rather kiss her butt 

[EquestriaGuy 1,074]

this is supposed to be a punishment?

[Lunar Echo 10,334]

1 hour ago, DayShadow said:

I would be willing to wager that the correction facilities in Equestria probably are not all that bad

Famous last words lol, but I do see your point.

[cuteycindyhoney 13,283]

Upon hearing of this, Twilight Sparkle immediately goes out to commit a felony!

[CypherHoof 26,479]

2 minutes ago, cuteycindyhoney said:

Upon hearing of this, Twilight Sparkle immediately goes out to commit a felony!

And regrets it when she finds Luna is standing in for her sister that day...