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A piece inspired by a Fallout: Equestria campaign in which I took part. It's a song about lost dreams, and poison in the soul. Balefire doesn't always have to burn from the outside in...

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Its an ok listen. However, you limited yourself to the i and the inverted V knowing this piece is in the key of d minor. What you need is a solid 4-chord progression that can enhance and develop your ideas. Some suggestions are: 





There are many more suggestions I can list. 

In terms of instrumentation, some strings would work here. The percussion sadly needs to go, or change to a reverse cymbal into a cinematic hit, instead of a beat. The kit could also be changed to an acoustic sounding kit. In terms of the piano, I see you had some light modulation on it. However, a steady slow-moving medium chorus or flanger would work here. A warm pad behind the piano matches too.

In terms of your vocals, you had way too many effects running when they first came in. I could not tell where it the song was going simply because you put too many effects on the vocals. For vocals, the only effects you should worry about are those responsible for clarity and brightness. 

All in all, this piece needs a ton of work and a possible redux. Dont be discouraged by my critique, for everyone isnt perfect but we can strive to become the best we can. 


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I personally liked this piece and vocal especially. Well done! I'm not a professional, so I cant give any sort of sofisticated critique like Thunder Dash.

However, I would love to hear little more beefy remix of this.

  • Brohoof 1

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