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Your actions cause the Mane Six to get arrested. What do you do?


KillerKingBakudan
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You find this merchant pony at an "enchanted toy" shop in Equestria. He's made several figures of existing ponies, including the Mane Six and the royal sisters. When you ask him why he's selling merchandise in their image, he simply says he's a huge fan of theirs and wants to be the first to bank of their awesomeness in the toy market. What makes these figures so good is they're very lifelike, almost as if they're shrunken versions of each pony they're sculpted after. And the material used to make them is so good, they won't break. Ever. They're impervious to any blunt force, and even magic force, making them suitable for both collectors AND fillies.

When the merchant offers you a considerable discount on the Mane Six, Celestia and Luna, it seems like the whole set's too good to pass up on. So you agree to buy them, and not long after, you take them to your place to mess with for shits and giggles. Like anybody who's ever owned a toy, you put them in stupid-looking positions, you pretend that they're saying things they normally wouldn't (like swearing non-stop), and you even smack them against each other. You especially take pleasure in grabbing a front hoof on the Twilight figure and hitting it repeatedly on the Celestia's face, like she was attacking her for her throne. You hit the Fluttershy figure's back hoof on Celestia's butt and say the word "bitch" in the most cute voice you can make. You take the Rainbow Dash figure and set her hooves down on the Luna figure's face, etc. And these are just a FEW of the crazy things you come up with, because you go at it for hours. Like the merchant said, these toys will never break. And they're a ton of fun!

On the next day, you go to Ponyville to see the Mane Six and show them your new toys, but then quickly learn from their friends and family that they're being held prisoner in Celestia's castle. So you go there and get permission to visit them in their cell. And when you ask them what happened, Twilight explains that on the previous night, they all lost control of their bodies and did things to Celestia and Luna.... that were disturbingly similar to how you were playing with those toys. Twilight involuntarily punched Celestia in the face over and over, while some indescribable force caused her to shout curse words at her, tell her that SHE's the rightful ruler of Equestria, and that she deserves the throne more. Fluttershy recounts shamefully that while all this was happening, she booted Celestia in the ass and called her a bitch. Rainbow Dash tells you that something drove her to stomp on Luna's face, and nearly suffocate her. Then they go on to describe everything else they did. They tell you the exact time it started, and you realize that every detail they gave you correlates perfectly with all the things you've done with the toys. It's not clear why Celestia and Luna took all the abuse though. They just stood there helplessly.

So you show the figures to them, do a little experiment by placing a hoof from the Applejack figure on the Rarity one's nose and saying "I love you", and the real Applejack follows suit. She boops the real Rarity and tells her she loves her. And of course after seeing this, the Mane Six all get fucking furious. They demand that you show the figures to Celestia and explain their power to her, so that YOU can take responsibility for their actions and get her to release them from jail.

You insist that you shouldn't be held accountable for anything, since you didn't make the toys, you know nothing about Equestrian magic, and you bought them from some stranger. How the hell were you supposed to know they'd be controlled? So instead, you tell them you're going to apprehend the pony who sold you the toys so that he can take the punishment instead. There's just one problem though. When you go to that same location the transaction was made, there's no sign of him OR his toy shop anywhere. And no matter who you ask, every pony tells you the same thing. They've never seen him. They've never heard of him. And you're crazy. It's like he never even existed.

So now you're out of options. Do you show Celestia the toys and take the prison sentence for the Mane Six, or do you maintain your innocence and stay out of it?

Edited by KillerKingBakudan
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Option C, I continue using the toys to control Celestia, Luna, and the Mane 6 for my own amusement. Oh, and I get Celestia and Luna to make me the new Princess of Equestria, hosting parties for every evil-doer who attends.

Eventually, I get bored of playing with them and hunt down the merchant to buy the background pony and villains set.

Quote

You take the Rainbow Dash figure and sit it down on the Luna figure's face, etc. And these are just a FEW of the crazy things you come up with, because you go at it for hours.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Edited by Lord Princess Panzy
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6 hours ago, KillerKingBakudan said:

Fluttershy figure's back hoof up the Celestia's butt and say the word "bitch" in the most cute voice you can make. You take the Rainbow Dash figure and sit it down on the Luna figure's face, etc. And these are just a FEW of the crazy things you come up with, because you go at it for hours.

 

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That is one of the longest and most convoluted "what ifs" I have ever read. What makes it especially disturbing is that essentially you are saying we live in Equestria (and have for all of our lives) and know the Mane 6 personally and are close with them... and have felt the need to buy toys of them and do disturbing and cruel things with them. That is just like us buying toys of our family and friends here and doing bizarre and compromising things to them. I suppose I can sort of see it the way we treat celebrities here, but the whole knowing them personally and being close friends with them sort of negates all of that for me.

I would have just simplified it and went with selling some drugs and when the pony popo rolled into town hiding the excess merchandise on them or something and spared my keyboard. :orly:

Either way, I would not have to worry about this since, although I collect them, I stopped goofing with toys years ago. Celestia & Luna would be safe and the Mane 6 would just be standing around gathering dust like most of my collectible stuff does.

 

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40 minutes ago, GrimGrimoire said:

That is one of the longest and most convoluted "what ifs" I have ever read. What makes it especially disturbing is that essentially you are saying we live in Equestria (and have for all of our lives) and know the Mane 6 personally and are close with them... and have felt the need to buy toys of them and do disturbing and cruel things with them. That is just like us buying toys of our family and friends here and doing bizarre and compromising things to them. I suppose I can sort of see it the way we treat celebrities here, but the whole knowing them personally and being close friends with them sort of negates all of that for me.

 

 

I don't see the rationale to this. You know the Mane Six, not the princesses. This would be like taking toys of close friends and making them do stupid things to political figures. And even if you know they wouldn't actually do those things, the absurdity of it is what makes it entertaining. It's all satirical in nature, and not unlike anything you see on shows like Robot Chicken. If you're disturbed by that, then you've been sheltered.

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I would just be honest and tell them that I bought the toys from a merchant, who disappeared, and asked that the toys be sealed away (I would say destroyed, but that might destroy the actual ponies in the process) so that they cannot be used for bad anymore. I think since I was not aware of the nature of the toys, I would be let off. and everypony would eventually get over it and eventually forgive me, since I didn't mean to do it.

 

If a jail sentence was unavoidable, I would take the sentence. I don't think I would be in jail for too long, considering my biggest crime would just be unintentional mischief.

Edited by Adachi
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So basically the Mane 6 toys are voodoo enchanted. Oh I’m soo going to make Rainbow Dash’s life utterly miserable beyond belief. The rest of them I’ll take the prison sentence, but not on Rainbow Dash’s case.

 

If that isn’t satisfactory, then I’ll just stay at a secret location of mine located at the Everfree Forest, play with the Rainbow Dash Toy one religiously in case if she does anything that would annoy me (which is about 90% of the time).

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  • 1 month later...

I would go to Celestia and Luna, explain how I got the toys, and that I was just playing with them. Then proceed to demonstrate the power of the toys using Celestia and Luna. Then they take them, lock them away, and erase everypony's, including your own, memory of the events. After all that, they ask Discord to dispose of them (magically send them) to a place not even himself can go to.

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On ‎3‎/‎13‎/‎2018 at 8:54 PM, KillerKingBakudan said:

So now you're out of options. Do you show Celestia the toys and take the prison sentence for the Mane Six, or do you maintain your innocence and stay out of it?

What is with you and having the main six try to get us imprisoned? :lol:

Yes I show the toys to the Princesses and explain what happened. If they don't beleive me when it comes to how I got the toys then I'll ask the question of why go through all of the effort to bring the toys to them in the first place. If things go wrong from there then I use the toys to my advantage.

On ‎3‎/‎14‎/‎2018 at 10:37 AM, Nature Tune said:

Use the toys to make princess Celestia and Luna give orders to set them free and force Twilight to perform a spell on them to make them forget : ) 

This is the best thing to do right here. And make sure the toys are stored in a safe place like the elements of harmony were. Sure Discord had managed to steal the elements but a being as powerful as him doesn't need voodoo dolls to control the main six.

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  • 2 years later...

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