Terrible Therapist game

[Ruddboy Olaf 10,627]

The only explanation is that part of Charles Barkley's soul was transferred into your dog. In which case, you should see how he his at Basketball.

Doc, have you ever kissed a dinosaur?

[TBD 17,228]

yes...your mother.

Doc, the universe is dying, what do? 

[EightBit 284]

Just fall into oblivion with it, my man. No point in defying fate. The darkness is welcoming.

Doc, how do I make my older sister stop eating so sweets? She’s ruining her health and cheating on her much-needed diet.

[Lord Valtasar 12,685]

Eat all the sweets so thete wont be any left for her.

Doc.i'm strangely obsessed with tubs of jelly

 

[EightBit 284]

Well, my expert opinion is that you should go through a therapy whereby you become sick of something by exposing yourself to it in vast amounts. *whispers* Rub the jelly on yourself... You won’t be obsessed for long... *evil laughter*

 

Doc, I think that my medication is making me hate mankind.

[TBD 17,228]

that's why you'd never drug deal. 

Doc, sometime i imagine myself flying, is it possible that one day it will happen? 

Edited July 23, 2018 by TBD

[EightBit 284]

Maybe, but you’ll probably need a licence for it, and it’ll likely be insanely hard to get, and the air traffic will probably be strictly regulated. You should probably give up on that little dream. On the other hand, some drugs may be an acceptable option, but side effects include violent outbursts, rashes, failure to make friends as our pony overlords have taught us, etc.

Doc, how do I stop myself from eating so much bacon?

[Ruddboy Olaf 10,627]

Inject cyanide into the bacon. That way, you physically can't eat it.

Doc, why do we suck at fighting games?

Edited July 23, 2018 by Panzy

[Lord Valtasar 12,685]

because 'we' don't play them enough *pushes a controller towards you*
doc,how will i know it when i'm dead?(if i'm not already,how would i know it if i was?)

[Ruddboy Olaf 10,627]

You'll know when Bruce Willis tells you so.

Doc, do you ever think super powers will become a reality?

[TBD 17,228]

the only super power that close to reality is me giving you a smack on the noggin.

Doc, I want to be a superhero but how?

[epiccuttlefish 112]

Gather some spent fuel from the nearest nuclear reactor, mix with as many household chemicals as you can find, and consume twice daily until the desired result is achieved.

 

Doc, I think I might be getting lazy. What do?

[Lord Valtasar 12,685]

Start by coming by instead of asking over the phone

Doc.if i get bitten by a cart will i become Cartman. or does it only work with spiders?

Edited July 25, 2018 by Lord Valtasar

[Dan. 1,825]

On 7/23/2018 at 11:35 AM, TBD said:

yes...your mother.

sick burn...

No, you'd be injured.

Doc, I accidentally put C4 in tide pods.

[TBD 17,228]

I heard people drinking C4, but not wearing them..

Doc, will I ever be cure?

[Lights Action 476]

You will! Just come to my house, fellow green human!

Doctor! I need sustenance! 

[epiccuttlefish 112]

Here! Eat this sandwich! It totally doesn't have any cyanide in it!

Doc, I think I might be a psychopath. How would you like to die?

[Dan. 1,825]

No, stop drinking.

 

Doc, the Backstreet Boys told me to rock my body right and I took it for granite. 

[Lord Valtasar 12,685]

Granite makes nice flooring

doc,i can't stop playing forum games

[TBD 17,228]

 Banned

Doc, can my curse be lifted? 

[Octavia Heartstrings 28,406]

No, too bad for you, loser! Hahaha!

Doc, I want to kill an authority figure. What should I do?

[TBD 17,228]

Why don't you sit down and relax...*getting the gun ready behind their back*

Doc, I have a habit of taking things without paying back what do?

 

[EightBit 284]

The best things in life are free, bro... The best things in life are free... 

Doc, I was watching a video about a certain group of idiotic people thinking that the comments from them would be hilarious, but instead, it just depressed me seeing as valid research evidently means nothing to these people. I have no more hope for an entire portion of mankind. What do I do?

[Octavia Heartstrings 28,406]

Drink some of this, it'll make you feel better. *hands you a bottle of pro-strength nail polish remover*

Doc, I have a screwdriver fetish. How do I get over it?

[TBD 17,228]

Try pretending to be a doctor who travels through time

Doc, I will you teach how to sing?