Retribution - MLP: FiM Fan Music

[SnowStorm097 11]

Just uploaded a song that was kinda WIP back when I made it in September 2017 to Youtube. I would have finished the song if my Macbook had not have broken down
 Pretty proud of the song despite some off its flaws, mainly guitar related as I am still kind off a newbie on guitar. I am however very proud of the atmosphere and the transistions in it. 

I plan on uploading some more Music that is actually  finished in the upcoming weeks/months as well

Feedback is always appriciated, although most of the songs I have on my Youtube is pretty old. And this song was far from being finished to begin With. 

Link:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=01I8BO2V2Sc

[Courageous Thunder Dash 7,809]

Ok

Firstly, your two themes contradict each other. Either you need to break the song up into two or you need to create a transition to build up to the distortion section and keep the song in the same key or modulate using the minor i of your current key, which is E Major. The minor i will become the vi of G and then you can play the V, which resolves to the one. Really, your ideas were very scattered in this piece and it needed a foundation to build upon. 

Furthermore, you stuck to the I and vi knowing you were in the key of E Major. I suggest you use a steady changing 4-chord progression that will help you keep your ideas organized and make your piece stand out. 

Your drums need much more variety and could use some fills. Don't always depend on your high-hat as your driver. You can also use the ride and the kick as well. You can even use a softer crash cymbal to act as the driver as well. 

 

All in all, this piece could use a massive overhaul and redux. I'm always here if you need me. Shoot me a PM and I'll get back to you at anytime. Don't be discouraged by what I said in my critique, for everyone has to start somewhere. 

[ztrash 62]

Not bad, I really enjoyed the guitars and drums in there. Gives a really post-apocalyptic vibe, which i dig. I'd like to see what your music sounds like in the future!

[SnowStorm097 11]

Thanks! 
 Working on getting better as wellso hopefully some better Music will come out later on xD