Derpy burns down your house. How do you punish her?

[KillerKingBakudan 702]

You invite a group of ponies to your place for dinner. Derpy happens to be one of them.

Some ponies offer to help with the meal prep, and Derpy decides to help out with the muffin baking. But not long after, the oven catches fire and so does the whole fucking kitchen. You try to put it out, but thanks to Derpy's careless use of an entire bottle of vegetable oil, the fire spreads to the rest of the house. Your only priority is getting your family and every pony out safely while the fire department comes. And you succeed.

Then Derpy gets all teary eyed and tries to apologize. She says she wants to make it up to you somehow. But you're so pissed off that you're not having any of it, and you feel like she deserves to be reprimanded.

But how? What punishment do you think she deserves?

[ZethaPonderer 2,196]

Drop an anvil on her head. She's a cartoon character. She can take it.

[A French Derpy full of Salt 404]

Take all of the muffins in hostages, she must pay all of the workers for repairing all of the damages in less than 4 months.

OR ELSE.

[Guest]

Since having your house burn down is a really big thing that I've never had to experience, I can't say for sure how I'd react.  Though I can speculate that even though she did massive damage, I probably wouldn't be able to act all furious towards someone who's already crying and apologizing - I can imagine that kind of thing would feel terrible from her point of view as well. Maybe I'd just ask her to help me with finding another apartment to live in.

[Gestum 2,493]

I would just sue her for the damages. There's really no need for any other punishment in my opinion.

[Scrubbed user 3,415]

I believe in equal punishments, so...

[Pr0m4NV14 837]

Make her pay the majority of property damage costs.she also has to help fix the house.

[Mirage 24,071]

An assortment of bran muffins with super laxatives hidden in them.

[Double Clutch 435]

I move in with her. It's only fair.

[Pinkarus 31]

------------> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) <------------

 

[The Recherche 29,965]

The punishment I would give her? Send her to an institution of some kind to keep her form doing it again. I don't think anything else is necessary. 

I wouldn't be terribly happy about the damages, though... 

[CheeryFox 23,811]

She'd have to agree on being sent to the funny farm. Only because she would be safe there.  

[SharpWit 2,472]

I'm going to be the first commenter with insurance and have her pay the deductible.

[King of Canterlot 9,588]

I would force her to to eat a muffin with glass shards in it, and ask her if baking the muffins was worth it for all the pain she caused. I might punch her in the face too if I'm really upset, though it depends on how bad the fire was and if anypony was hurt. If somepony had gotten hurt in the fire I would have reduced Derpy to a twitching bloody mess for carelessly harming an innocent pony  

[SharpWit 2,472]

Salty French Unicorn's profile pic perfectly illustrates how Derpy is going to have to go about thanks to all of your vicious reactions

[Snow Frostflame 3,567]

*stares her down* "You don't cross the Master of Ice."

 

Well time to rebuild... again.

[Lunar Glow 674]

Snuggle her to death 

[Narcissus 352]

I'd move in with her. Being stuck with me would be punishment enough for any crime! 

[Cwanky 17,445]

Sue her butt off in court or have her tried for criminal arson. She just burnt my only residence down which my family paid tons of money in over the years in mortgages. I don't care how cute or accidental it was, if she recklessly burnt down my house, I will do everything in my power to bring her to justice. 

You may be able to get away with careless destruction and theft in Equestria, but not in the US. She can apologize through her jail cell. 

[LucasB 195]

I'm disappointed in a lot of you, hasn't My Little Pony taught about the futility of revenge? It is detrimental and often do not solve anything.

Human punishments work as a balance for your expected gain. It works as: if you do a certain action, then an even worst bad thing (punishment) will also happen to you, therefore deterring you from the crime. However, this works only for intentional acts of crime. Any accident event can't be prevented by such a deterrence. Therefore, what I do to Derpie must somehow heal the situation, such as making her pay to rebuild my house. 

Now, I only say this because it is Equestria, since ponies generally do the right thing and are cooperative and don't try to take advantage of everything. Most humans are just apathetic, selfish assholes.

[Dreambiscuit 8,021]

I'd sentence her to eating all the muffins she wanted, all the hugs she could receive and a speaking part in every episode of MLP (using her awesome original voice, of course).  

[Kevin Tang 2,422]

I will make her pay for the reconstruction of my house of course. >:( And be sure to not to let her cook in my house next time.

[Chronicplane 58]

Report her for the damages done to my property, sue her dry and make sure she spends plenty of time in prison or have a warrant placed on her. (something like that, plus as a bonus demand a supply of muffins)

[Prospekt 10,984]

I'd request that she pay for the damages that aren't covered by insurance. Derpy has a good heart; I feel like if she wanted to make it up to me, she would honestly try if it meant I didn't have to take her to court.

[Shadow Nightwing 24]

I make her build a new house, and then leave her in the forest to the timberwolves.