Post A Quote From Your Day, Without Any Context.

[Denim&Venöm 20,020]

"The odd faction of Mark Henry, Stephanie McMahon and Alundra Blaze, AKA Sexual Corporate Carnage, were in the crowd."

[Samurai Equine 53,843]

The phone has been on blast all day today and all day yesterday. So if you tried to call me and only got a busy signal, that's why.

[Will Guide 21,365]

I just cleaned that!

[Ganaram Inukshuk 3,682]

Sandbar is best Sandra Barbara.

[Denim&Venöm 20,020]

"English man dies from drinking 10 gallons of carrot juice." 

 "So the limit is 9." 

[Early Sunsets 2,108]

"So let's everyone say something interesting about themselves."

"I've only masturbated once."

[Samurai Equine 53,843]

...Coffee cake? 

[Tropical Melody 7,028]

"Do you want a wash?"

"Pardon?!?"

"Do you want a complimentary wash of your vehicle?"

"AH!! Yes. Thank you."

(This genuinely happened, yesterday.)

 

[Treeglow Flicker 14,095]

If it wasn't for the potential of society spoiling my fun, I would just vaporize them and be done with it.

[Ganaram Inukshuk 3,682]

"In the world of computer science, we have what we call The Dragon Book." <Tries to imagine Smolder burning Sandbar on the book>

[Denim&Venöm 20,020]

"We should take [The Finnish Border] and push it somewhere else!" 

[Tropical Melody 7,028]

[images] "Note: your order may be split into multiple packages."

.

.

 

[Samurai Equine 53,843]

Why isn't it boiling? I swear, it's just evaporating... I've never seen this before! This is suppose to be the easiest thing to do! ...Is it the bacon fat?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

P.S. To the people who reacted to my last reply,
@Tropical Melody and @ExplosionMare
*Serves you both a slice of coffee cake* Enjoy. 

Edited October 6, 2019 by Samurai Equine

[Lucky Bolt 35,110]

“You just have a really cute ass.” 

[Treeglow Flicker 14,095]

"Hopefully tomorrow I will be able to enjoy the happy state of Smug Mode."

[Samurai Equine 53,843]

I've had such a bad case of morning brain, I didn't know it was 12 until you told me it was time for lunch!

[Ganaram Inukshuk 3,682]

"[...]Ocellus and they accidentally ruin the Fifth Age, along with each new generation[...]"

Thanks, Markov Text Generator.

[tsukuyomi 81]

"Sometimes there's ox tail but I don't think there's anything weird in that"

[Tropical Melody 7,028]

"I hope you realize that your life isn't worth a bootful of warm piss"

 

[Denim&Venöm 20,020]

"What is the number one issue that is sweeping this great nation? I'm gonna tell you. The fact that people can't afford Burberry scarves." 

[Samurai Equine 53,843]

Where's the lemon bar? I want that lemon bar.

[Tropical Melody 7,028]

"I recently did a weekend course in the ancient Chinese art of Feng Shui. You can ask me anything ..."

 

[Denim&Venöm 20,020]

"But every single one of those people never met a goddamn fighter jet pilot, because they can do anything they want." 

[Samurai Equine 53,843]

"French Onion Dip and Sour Cream are basically the same thing..."

"No it's not! It's different. My tongue said so."

[Tropical Melody 7,028]

"Ah, Cairo! With its muscling barketplace, and its steaming treats!"
"He meant, of course, 'teeming streets.'"
"No, he didn't."