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Reminder Concerning Life Advice

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We have always been protective of those who post in there, so now is a good time to remind everyone what it is for and what it isn’t for. This is going to be one of those times that staff are going to be accused of being draconian or promoting some sort of political movement nonsense. Let me get right out in front of that now.

No matter how strongly you disagree with how we have run that section, no matter how wrong you feel we are, it isn’t changing. This isn’t a negotiable part of MLPF. In short, we are 100% comfortabe with how we approach Life Advice. Don’t life that? Ignore the section then. Now that that is out of the way 

There are three general reasons people would use Life Advice

1. Mental well being help. Basically someone is feeling lost afraid or needs someone to talk to and are comfortable doing so in public. It isn’t a place to say you will commit suicide, but it can be a place to say that you struggle with that. No, no one on staff is a Licensed Mental Health worker, and most times we can and do point you to resources to help. The community is likely not equipped to help you with serious mental health issues. What we can do is listen, be supportive, and be friendly. Remember those three words. 

2. Venting. Usually people just want to get something off their chest and it is too personal to do so in a blog. Life Advice topics do not show up in search or on the index or on google. It is a protected forum for this very reason. It has been for many many years. Venting doesn’t mean that the person wants a reply. Just getting something out in public can be cathartic and a stress release. It is not and has never been an invitation to challenge the persons view point. Listen, be supportive, be friendly. It is NOT a debate section. If someone’s vent is related to personal opinions that you disagree with, you don’t have a pass to rebut them there. We have dozens of forums on MLPF where you can strongly disagree with a viewpoint. This isn’t one of them. Don’t like it? I really don’t know what to tell you.

 

3. General adulting and Advice. Say you are dealing with something that isn’t a mental health issue but you need advice. Major selection, telling a friend you are gay, how to adult, remove pests from your house, etc. Advice. Easy. You can post general “How do I adult” topics here too. And people can offer advice, and even counter suggestions. What you shouldn’t do when you reply to this area is engage a responder in a full on debate on why his advice is wrong. You are here to talk to the OP. Keep that in mind. Listen, be supportive, be friendly.

 

It simply comes down to this — if you have nothing nice to say — stay out. Alternatively there is this amazing feature called Messages that allows you to engage someone directly instead of publicly. If you honestly feel that the person needs a direct and honest opinion, maybe try that route. After all you came there to help right? So a personal one-on-one with that approach is far better than a self-serving public reply that feeds into the general psychology of “I wanna be seen as smart and right”.  If you are honestly trying to help, go offline.

 

Final comment on this before I post and lock this topic (this isn’t up for debate) ... if you genuinely see advice someone is giving in there that is dangerous or harmful by all means report it. Like I said, we heavily monitor that forum, and I personally read every post. That said a well thought out report could make us see where a post is not that helpful. 

 

That’t about it. Be good to each other guys. 

 

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