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A Relationship That You Messed Up


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Have you ever been in a relationship (romantic or not) that you were the reason for it ending?

I was in a relationship with someone in college. We were together for a long while but I was ultimately the reason why we ended. It was entirely my fault. While I am over it all, a part of me still feels bad for how I treated them.

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I have been in a relationship, but I was on the other end of it. It was difficult to get back up again after being throw out.

 

After that, I make sure to never get into a relationship that is destined to end.

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I had an early teen relationship that ended more or less because I wasn't ready for it. I think we both allowed our emotions to run away on us, fairly typical for our age at the time, but in the end I kept worrying about long-term commitment and thinking that I was diving headfirst into something that would change my life forever. So I kept trying to stall things and eventually we just knew that it was never going to work out.

Even though it was a long time ago, I've never been in a serious relationship since. I guess it's something that I want to feel is the right time for. :dash:

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I’ve screwed up a lot of relationships (friendship ones) because I’m so detached from them, if not because of that then the fact I was too mentally unstable for the other person to handle, hence why I don’t let myself get attached to people because I’m scared they’ll see who I really am and leave me because of it. I’ve only screwed up one romantic relationship, and I was 16 at the time and not all wanting to settle into a committed relationship, but...he was.
 

Now, I’ve been in a committed relationship for over 2 years, but I wonder how sometimes. I guess I’m just thankful I found someone who has put up with me for so long. :adorkable: 

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Never messed up in any relationship (friends wise). We just went on our separate ways and most likely they forget that I ever existed. 

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(edited)

If I'm being honest I don't know how people tolerate me as much as they do. :sealed: Maybe I'm better at platonic and romantic relationships than I give myself credit for? :huh: One I know I messed up, for sure, was a relationship I had with one of my exes. I messed up by not telling HER I wasn't romantically into girls, trans or not. I also almost messed up a potential friendship by laughing at the person I would be friends with when they had a heart attack. No, I didn't think it was funny and it DEFINITELY wasn't, I just sometimes have an issue with laughing in certain tense and stressful situations.

 

I mean I've definitely been on the opposite side of this before as well... One particular instance of that involved a "friend" in middle school that would constantly switch between being a pretty good friend and being a bully to me. I suspect it had to do with maintaining an image with other people he was friends with.

Edited by Furret ᐡ꒳ᐡ
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I really don't know what happened in the end. I never got closure. But I do know that back a few years before she disappeared from my life, I made some mistakes. When it dawned on me, I felt absolutely terrible. But by the time I realized, it was too late. I wanted to make the apology in person, but she had already made enough excuses to not see me in person at that point, so it was never to be.

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(edited)

I've messed up on friendships that I blame myself for them ending prematurely. I'm just not good with friendships and it's my fault why. I'm hoping to get better at them.

Edited by Magic Note
Clarifying
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Way too many in way too many levels.

In most circumstances, there's no way I can appologize, even if I found the courage to do so.

In other cases, is better that way. People is doing better off without me. It would be selfish to reach out to them after they went their way for the better. I just have to accept it.

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I was very close friends with someone here on the forums a while back and I may have inadvertently given the impression things were more romantic than intended. I have a playful, sometimes flirtatious personality at times, without meaning anything by it, and should have been more disciplined. When I mentioned I was getting married I think it hit him kind of hard and it made me appear heartless and slutty; which I think maybe I was in retrospect. I tried to find subtle ways of breaking it to him earlier but whenever I tried, something else deviated me away from it. He left the forums shortly after, having also experienced some serious family tragedy around the same time, and I regret that I added to his misery. I was hurt once in a similar way a long time ago and here I was paying forward the same pain on someone else. It makes me feel ashamed and angry at myself.

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  • 3 years later...
On 6/17/2020 at 1:49 AM, The Wife of Law said:

Have you ever been in a relationship (romantic or not) that you were the reason for it ending?

I was in a relationship with someone in college. We were together for a long while but I was ultimately the reason why we ended. It was entirely my fault. While I am over it all, a part of me still feels bad for how I treated them.

Well, my last romantic relationship I ended being the one to end it. Although the reasons I ended it weren’t due to me. I’ve told that story before, It’s too long and boring to repeat.

There’s been friendships where I ended up being the reason we were no longer friends. Lack of communication mainly. I was the only one who ever started conversations, and so when I stopped doing so the friendships ended. It’s just too much work to have to always be the one carrying and starting conversations. 

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There was one that ended because of my stupidity. I see myself as the bad guy in that relationship because I wasn't there for her when she needed me. I was alot more selfish back then. Her dad died and I was more concerned about going to work when I could have just called in. I wasn't very understanding at the time and thinking about this past relationship makes me hate myself everytime I think about it. If there was a chance to go back in time, I wouldn't do it to save the relationship, I'd do it just to be there for her when she needed me. I don't want forgiveness for what I did. I just hope her life is an outstanding one.

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I had let my insecurities and obsession get the best of me and caused me to lose the very person I deeply cared and loved. She was special to me but after realizing it was me not her, it helped me to self-heal and move on.  

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  • 4 months later...

I had a chance in high school but I didn't really like her so it never went through. Though that seems like it was my only shot now...

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 1 month later...

I will admit without regret that there have been a couple I've messed up, ended, or had a part in messing it up. Why do I not regret them anymore? Because if they hadn't had ended (whether I messed them up or not) I wouldn't be here with my husband right now. He is the best thing to happen to me, he came into my life and made it that much better. I'm happy the others left. :twi:

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(edited)

Oh wow. I read this thread and can see that I'm not the only one. Thanks poneys, I love you.

On 2020-06-24 at 1:49 PM, Dreambiscuit said:

I was very close friends with someone here on the forums...

Well, actually I was in very similar story but from the opposite side.

Long story short. Many years ago I had a good friend here who I truly enjoyed to talk to. But as my life in general was turning into shit with speed of Rainbow Dash some mental disorder happened to me and I was escaping to fantasy where our friendship may grow into something. When I knew she met someone special I felt like world was ruined "...and hurtful words were said, flaring temper were inflamed..."(one well known song). I told her many mean things. Everything were ruined pretty quickly.

I stayed here couple years more and even met some great people who I grateful for great moments of my life, staying here were reminding me about my moment of shame so I quit, stopped watching MLP and even dropped my passion to art.

I hated myself until a therapist gave me an explanation that it happened not because I'm bad person but because I was sick. And even if it strongly reduced the feeling of burning shame I still feel sorry that she was around when I lost control, she didn't deserve it. Well I learn my friendship lessons the hard way. >w<

Meanwhile, it seems I handled my demons so the brand new Crypty is back again. Missed the MLP G4 grand finale, but still intending to have true fun ^-^ Cheers

Edited by Crypty Scribbles
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(edited)

"A Relationship That You Messed Up"

My friendship with my Bestie, @Lucky Bolt because I always get too happy and excited when I get a chance to talk to her since it's such a rarity.

I wish I could tell her how sorry I am for upsetting her. :blush:

 

Edited by Sparklefan1234
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