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sad A Canterlot Wedding-The Alternate Ending


Wardaddy

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(edited)

My Little Pony: FiM is the sole property of Hasbro and Lauren Faust. This is a not-for-profit fanfiction made for the reading pleasure of myself and others.

 

Chapter 1-Fallout

 

"This day has been just perfect

The kind of day of which I've dreamed since I was small

Everypony I'll soon control

Every stallion, mare, and foal

Who says a girl can't really have it all?"

 

As Chrysalis, the evil, parasitic, bug-like Queen of the Changelings laughed gleefully, Twilight took the chance to end this. Moving over to Cadance, she said "Quick! Go to him while you still have the chance!" before zapping her restraints to nothingness with her magic. With no time to lose, Cadance went over to her husband-to-be, the Captain of the Royal Guard and Twilight's brother, Shining Armor. With a quick zap of her magic, Shining was freed from Chrysalis's grasp. "Wha-whe-huh? Is....is the wedding over?" Before Cadance could answer, the tall, menacing figure of Chrysalis stomped in front of them, holes in multiple sections of her legs and body. "Its, all, over!" Boomed the changeling queen fearsomely. "Your spell! Use your spell!" Cried out Twilight, attempting to coax her brother to action. However, again the mocking, rage-inducing laughter of Chrysalis rang throughout the wedding hall. "What good would that do? My changelings already roam free". Indeed, the Changelings continued to wreak havoc throughout Canterlot. "No!". Quickly, Shining attempted to conjure his shield spell, to no avail. With a droop of his ears, he assumed defeat. "My power is useless now. I don't have the strength to repel them". But then, Cadance moved up against him, and reassured "My love will give you strength". Again, the evil laughter cut them down. "What a lovely but absolutely ridiculous sentiment!" As Chrysalis looked out the window, admiring her handiwork, Cadance and Shining looked at each other, before the former closed his eyes. Again, Shining summoned the energy of his shield spell to his horn, before Cadance added the power of her magic to his own. With a crackle of electricity, the two touched horns, expanding the power further into a much stronger force. The magic enveloped the two, as they opened their eyes in awe, before again locking eyes with each other, smiling, and closing them, allowing the magic to grow in strength again, lifting them off the ground. As the power grew and expanded, the Mane 6 were forced to avert their eyes from the sheerness of the spell. Chrysalis then turned around to look, her eyes going wide and her mouth agape in shock and horror. The hall started to rock with the immense force of the energy. Finally, Shining and Cadance opened their eyes at the spell's climax, allowing the magic to envelope them in a bright white light, before sucking the magic inwards and exploding it back out in a massive pulsing wave of sheer magical power. Chrysalis screamed for her life as the wave collided with her, pushing her out of the hall and into the horizon beyond Canterlot. Joining her in the wave was the thousands of Changelings who were terrorizing the city, caught completely unaware by the sudden pulse. In what seemed like an eternity, the wave finally disapparated, leaving Chrysalis and her Changelings to plummet to the ground, screaming into the distance.

 

 

Back in the wedding hall, Cadance and Shining began their descent to the ground, as the magic that they summoned together began to subdue. Everypony in the room began cheering, celebrating the victory against a force that had taken them by surprise, all except Twilight, who was facing the doorway, her back turned to the celebration. Celestia approached the lavender unicorn, gently placing a hoof on her shoulder. "Don't worry about me. I'm fine. You have a real wedding to put together". Slowly, Twilight looked behind her, a tear rolling down from her left eye, before looking back down again. "I've got a real wedding to put together, huh?" Asked Twilight, her voice hoarse with pain, and a sadness that Celestia quickly picked up on, concerning the sun princess greatly. "Are you OK Twilight?" Asked Celestia. Behind her, the celebrations died down as the other ponies in the room noticed Twilight still had her back turned. "You OK there Sugarcube?" Asked Applejack. However, she was met with no response. "What's the matter Twiley?" Asked Shining, concerned. "We won, didn't we?" This managed to elicit a response from the lavender unicorn, her voice still hoarse with pain. "Yeah Shining, we won". Shining's mood did not change either. He was now very concerned for his sister, who had managed to free his wife-to-be from the Canterlot Caves, the first step towards their victory against the changelings. Suddenly, Twilight spun around, slapping Celestia's hoof off her shoulder, almost dislodging the princess's golden horseshoe from its perch. Her face blazing with anger, Twilight yelled at the group in an almost unholy rage. "DO YOU TAKE ME FOR A FOAL OR SOMETHING?!!!" If you thought everypony in the room aside from Twilight was concerned, they were now terrified. Nopony had ever seen Twilight so angry, and yet they still didn't know the cause of it. Again however, Twilight continued. "You were my mentor Celestia! I believed in you! I trusted you! Luna help me, I even saved your kingdom twice for you! AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME?! You would abandon me for the sake of a COMPLETE STRANGER?!!!! And the enemy, no less!" Celestia was taken very much aback by Twilight's words. She knew why Twilight was angry, and on top of that there would be no consoling her. She, and everypony else involved in what happened at the rehearsal would be made to pay for their actions, especially Shining Armor. "Twilight, I know you are upset over what happened, but you must understand. We had no reason to believe that the Changeling Queen was impersonating the Cadance that stood before us, and as well as that your actions did not help matters either. In the end though, you were right, and we are all sorry for not trusting you, my most faithful student". Celestia lowered her head, in a request for forgiveness on behalf of herself and everypony else who abandoned Twilight. Little did she know, however, that Twilight would not accept that. "I cannot grant your forgiveness, Princess, because you still don't know the kind of danger I was left in when you abandoned me. And by the way, you told me that I had a lot to think about. Well princess....." Twilight slowly moved up to Celestia, ready to blast the next round of flak into her face. "WHO'S THE ONE THAT HAS A LOT TO THINK ABOUT NOW?!". Celestia stumbled back, shocked. She had officially become the first to realise exactly what kind of peril Twilight was placed in when she was left alone in the wedding hall. Cadance remained next to her husband-to-be, as frightened as everypony else. "Shining, honey, why is Twilight so angry?" When no response came, Cadance looked at Shining, to find his face etched with fear and guilt, for he also knew the reason Twilight was mad, and he also knew it was his fault that this powder keg finally blew. Twilight then moved over to the Mane 5, who were all sharing mixed emotions. Rarity had her hoof over her mouth, eyes wide in shock. Applejack was clearly having trouble trying to process the situation. Normally, she was second-in-command to Twilight, and if anypony knew the unicorn better, it was her. Rainbow's eyes were also wide in disbelief. She had seen Twilight lose her cool before, but never like this. Pinkie's emotion was probably the dullest of the 5, her mane had gone straight, and her pink colouring had taken on a slightly greyish tone. Her eyes were flooding with tears. Fluttershy was terrified. Her eyes were awash with tears and while trying to stay still, she tried her best to keep her distance from the enraged lavender unicorn that stood before her. Finally, Twilight spoke again. "Now, you five........traitors-" Before Twilight could continue, Applejack immediately cut in. "Traitors?! Now see here missy! You've got no right to be callin' us traitors! You just burst in, cornered the princess and started wailin' about her bein' evil with no proof! How in Tartarus did you expect us to believe you?!" "Because, AJ" Growled Twilight "you are my friends! What kind of friends abandon their friend to go and comfort somepony that they never met before?!" "But Twilight, we won, didn't we?!" Cried Pinkie. "Besides, I know what'll cheer you up. A party!" However, Twilight was quick to shoot her down. "Pinkie, this is one issue that cannot be solved with a party, and of all ponies here, even YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT!" Almost instantly, Pinkie recoiled in sheer terror. Suddenly, Rainbow Dash had had enough. "That's it!" Roared the sky blue Pegasus, who then charged at Twilight, pushing her back-first into the hall's back wall. "I've heard enough out of you egghead!" Roared Rainbow, directing her fury at Twilight. "Ok, so you got left alone. What else did you have to lose?!". Suddenly, Twilight bowed her head down, tears beginning to stream down her face. "You really want to know Rainbow?" "Know what?" Asked Rainbow, confused, but still angered. Twilight then looked up at her, transformed from a raging bull to an emotional wreck. With a sniff, she produced the answer. "MY LIFE!!!"

 

Almost instantly after Twilight blared out what could've been the true cost of their mistake, everypony in the room except for Twilight fell silent. Rainbow was especially shocked. She had come within an inch of bucking Twilight in her face, and now she found herself releasing the sobbing unicorn from her grasp. Nopony could believe what they just heard, especially Shining Armor. For the Mane 5, their reaction to Twilight's death would've been for mostly personal reasons, but for Cadance, Shining Armor and Celestia, things went much, much deeper than that. Both Celestia and Shining Armor were placed in charge of security for the duration of the ceremony, and with Twilight's death, all their efforts to protect Equestria would've been in vain. If Chrysalis had succeeded, then Shining would've failed his duty to protect Canterlot as Captain of the Guard. On top of that would have been the failure to protect his future wife as her future husband, and above all else, he would've failed to protect Twilight as her Big Brother Best Friend Forever. And in conjunction, Celestia would've failed in her duty to protect her subjects as one of the princesses of Equestria, as well as failing to protect her most faithful student, as her teacher and mentor. And on Cadance's part, if Twilight had indeed perished at the hooves of Chrysalis, then she may never have made it out of the caves, and she would die as well. Everypony then came to realize the bigger picture: Twilight was indeed the lock that guarded the door to Equestria's future, and if it hadn't been for her, then Chrysalis would've become the key that would have surely unlocked Equestria's fall. "Can you see it now everypony? Can you see it Cadance?" Asked Twilight painfully. "She could've killed me! Clearly by abandoning me, you only proved that my life wasn't important to ANY OF YOU!" WHAT KIND OF MONSTERS ARE YOU?! My friends, my family, my m......" Twilight couldn't say anymore. The pain had become too great for her to ignore. Almost as quickly as she rounded on her friends, she fled the hallway, sobbing. The guards that lined the corridor could only exchange worried glances as the distraught unicorn tore past them, not caring who saw her.

 

Back in the hall, the atmosphere had become very dull and sad, as if a long, painful fall from grace had occurred there, which it had. As the Mane 5, along with Celestia and Shining Armor, began sharing thoughts and feelings, Cadance was still trying to process what she had just heard. Because of the actions of her aunt, the bearers of the Elements of Harmony, and above all else, her husband-to-be, her favourite filly may have met her end, and if that had happened, then the fall of Equestria would've been assured as well. At once, she regained a grip on herself, having comprehended that Twilight was hurt by everypony she loved and trusted. With newfound anger and determination, Cadance turned to face the group, and get some answers. "Shining, is it true?" Shining couldn't answer. Instead, he looked away from his future wife, his face etched with remorse. This only served to infuriate Cadance, who advanced upon the glum captain. "Shining, what happened?!" Left with no way out, Shining did his best to drown his sorrows, and explain to Cadance what had happened. Once he had finished, Cadance was left horrorstruck. "I......I.......I don't..........I-I........Shining, how?! How could you be so cruel?!" Cadance then turned to face the Mane 5, who could only return glum, sad expressions. "And you, you five.......you're her friends! How can you call yourself her friends after that?! And you are also the bearers of the Elements of Harmony! You're supposed to demonstrate what the Elements each represent, that's the sole reason why they chose you! Rainbow Dash, you are the Element of Loyalty. You should have stuck by Twilight's side no matter what! And you, Fluttershy. You are the Element of Kindness! You should've shown Twilight empathy when everypony else failed to! And you, Applejack. You may be the Element of Honesty, but the least you could've done was to give Twilight the benefit of the doubt! And yet you couldn't find it in your good character to do that!". Finally, Cadance faced her aunt, Princess Celestia, who looked as sad as only the sun goddess could get without totally breaking down. "And you, Aunt Celestia.......even you couldn't show your student the least bit of kindness that only a princess of Equestria could". Celestia could only lower her head in shame. Again, Cadance faced Shining, tears welling up in her eyes. "Shining......I thought you loved me!". Shining was shocked to hear this. He loved Cadance deeply, and to hear something like this was almost foreign to him. "But Cadance, I still do! How can you say such a thing?!" To Cadance, this was almost insulting. "If you really loved me Shining, then you wouldn't have treated my favourite filly like some piece of dirt! She's your sister! She's your flesh and blood, and yet you have the nerve to put me before her! Shining......how could you?!" "Cadance, please-" Celestia tried to interject, however Cadance silenced her before she could speak. "I don't want to hear it Aunt Celestia! You are in no position to say anything right now!" "Cadance......please" Shining struggled to find words. "We didn't know........I didn't know.........there was no way of knowing that that was the Changeling Queen". "You couldn't have known". Said Cadance. "You were under a spell. And yet, it's funny. You were the only pony who was around the impostor for most of the time, and yet you noticed nothing different about her behaviour". With that, Shining had run out of ideas. All he could do was hang his head in shame. "Now, if you'll all excuse me, there's a distraught, heartbroken little pony I have to see to". At once, Cadance began trotting towards the door, before stopping mid-journey. She turned to face the group one last time. "And as quoted by you, Shining Armor, you can forget about me marrying you. In fact, if I were any one of you, I wouldn't come near me or Twilight at all. And as you said, Aunt Celestia, you all have a lot to think about". 

 

As Cadance went off to find Twilight, Shining was left crushed. He was no longer the proud, happy stallion he was when Twilight arrived the previous day. He was now very much a shadow of his former self, his honour and respect ripped away from him. Karma had bitten him hard in the flank, as only yesterday it was him telling off his sister for upsetting his bride. Now it was his bride, or should I say, ex-bride telling him off for upsetting his sister. At this point, he didn't care if death was at his door. All he wanted was to apologise to Twilight, and to Cadance respectively. Unfortunately, the prospects of that happening looked bleak. All that was left for him to wonder now, was how things could get worse.   

Edited by Firebolt Blitz
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Wow, I must say, this is very well written. It is also very believable, as we know all-too-well how hot headed she can be at times...

It's been a pleasure reading this, although where it says "...and the funny thing it you were around her..." the it should be is. Don't mean to be nit-picky, but yeah :)

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...wow. The feels. The feels.. This was very well written and I wouldn'tve been surprised if they used it as a plot. Well done. You really pulled at the heartstrings.

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...wow. The feels. The feels.. This was very well written and I wouldn'tve been surprised if they used it as a plot. Well done. You really pulled at the heartstrings.

Wow......this is probably the best review I could ever get in a long, long time. Many thanks, this song was my inspiration https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMpRXKrKDrY. Also, after studying many fanfics based on the same idea, and after reviewing the script thanks to MLP Wiki, I came down to the conclusion that my ending would conclude with Twilight revealing the heavy toll her abandonment at the wedding rehearsal took, followed by her isolating herself from everypony, feeling that she could trust nopony ever again. Keep reading, it's about to get even more interesting. And trust me, the feels won't end here.

Wow, I must say, this is very well written. It is also very believable, as we know all-too-well how hot headed she can be at times...

It's been a pleasure reading this, although where it says "...and the funny thing it you were around her..." the it should be is. Don't mean to be nit-picky, but yeah :)

Fixed it. Thanks for the review. As for Twi's outburst, I drew on how hot-headed she can get, like you said, combined with the mental agony she suffered at the hands of Shining Armor, Celestia and the Mane 5, 7 ponies she knew, loved, and trusted, at least until they turned their backs on her. It took a lot of reviewing of Twi's expression after Celestia left her, but I managed to bring it down to the wire, and it seems that I did that flawlessly (minus the spelling mistake). Again, thanks a bunch, and do stay tuned! Things are just getting started.

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Eventhough I mostly view Twilight as the easily forgiving sort, I gotta admit, this is pretty funny and heartwrenching all at the same time.

 

Of course, I still believe that Twilight's friends, brother, and mentor all apologized to her offscreen at some point.

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Eventhough I mostly view Twilight as the easily forgiving sort, I gotta admit, this is pretty funny and heartwrenching all at the same time.

 

Of course, I still believe that Twilight's friends, brother, and mentor all apologized to her offscreen at some point.

Not trying to sound like a critic or anything, but why do you call it "funny"? It's not meant to be funny. This is a take on what would most likely happen if Twilight did still carry the emotional scars from her abandonment by everypony she trusted and loved. Heartwrenching? Buck yes. Funny? Needs definition. But let us all take pride that this did not actually happen, for we were shown that Twilight has a very strong integrity. Strong enough to forgive her friends, her mentor and her brother for their mistakes.

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Not trying to sound like a critic or anything, but why do you call it "funny"? It's not meant to be funny. This is a take on what would most likely happen if Twilight did still carry the emotional scars from her abandonment by everypony she trusted and loved. Heartwrenching? Buck yes. Funny? Needs definition. But let us all take pride that this did not actually happen, for we were shown that Twilight has a very strong integrity. Strong enough to forgive her friends, her mentor and her brother for their mistakes.

In that case, I take back the "funny" part. I guess I was just laughing at how Twilight expressed her rage. I know it's meant to be serious, but somehow, it kinda amused me. Anyhoof, I'm sorry.

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In that case, I take back the "funny" part. I guess I was just laughing at how Twilight expressed her rage. I know it's meant to be serious, but somehow, it kinda amused me. Anyhoof, I'm sorry.

Its cool. For me personally, I intended for Twi to be deadly serious, hence the use of bold in parts of her dialogue. Serious to the point where everypony in the room would tremble in fear, and lower their heads in shame, realizing that their mistake not only put Twilight in danger, but the kingdom as well. Twilight could've been killed (or seriously hurt) and the Changelings would've won, unless Luna intervened of course. Unfortunately, we all witnessed that once they had enough power, even the princesses would be no match for the Changelings. Can you see how serious this really is?

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Its cool. For me personally, I intended for Twi to be deadly serious, hence the use of bold in parts of her dialogue. Serious to the point where everypony in the room would tremble in fear, and lower their heads in shame, realizing that their mistake not only put Twilight in danger, but the kingdom as well. Twilight could've been killed (or seriously hurt) and the Changelings would've won, unless Luna intervened of course. Unfortunately, we all witnessed that once they had enough power, even the princesses would be no match for the Changelings. Can you see how serious this really is?

I understand completely. Still, as you pointed out yourself, it's refreshing to know that Twilight is the easily forgiving sort. Plus, I don't know about you, but I think it would have been nice to see her giving hugs to her peers more often, even the CMC after the Gabby Gums incident, which reminds me: I'm considering writing out my own version of the sequence in "Ponyville Confidential" with the CMC delivering the apologetic letter all over Ponyville and being forgiven, with some dialogue added in to make it more heartwarming. Does that sound good to you?

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(edited)

I understand completely. Still, as you pointed out yourself, it's refreshing to know that Twilight is the easily forgiving sort. Plus, I don't know about you, but I think it would have been nice to see her giving hugs to her peers more often, even the CMC after the Gabby Gums incident, which reminds me: I'm considering writing out my own version of the sequence in "Ponyville Confidential" with the CMC delivering the apologetic letter all over Ponyville and being forgiven, with some dialogue added in to make it more heartwarming. Does that sound good to you?

It sounds as good to me as anything does on this forum. Just make sure you study the script of the episode well to get an idea. Its what I did for this one. It would also help to have music playing as you write, to help remind you of the feeling you want to imprint in your fanfic. For my alternate ending, I used music from Bioshock "Ocean On His Shoulders" (From 0:16 to 1:40, where the feels really start to kick in). Find a piece of music you think would fit the general mood of your fanfic, search it up on Yourepeat.com, and take it from there.

Edited by Firebolt Blitz
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(edited)

During the episode, I was a little outraged at the other mane 5, as well as Shining and Celestia. 
So with that, I believe this story is well written. 

Edited by Kyouko-Chan
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It sounds as good to me as anything does on this forum. Just make sure you study the script of the episode well to get an idea. Its what I did for this one. It would also help to have music playing as you write, to help remind you of the feeling you want to imprint in your fanfic. For my alternate ending, I used music from Bioshock "Ocean On His Shoulders" (From 0:16 to 1:40, where the feels really start to kick in). Find a piece of music you think would fit the general mood of your fanfic, search it up on Yourepeat.com, and take it from there.

Believe me, I've seen the episode enough times, especially the ending, to understand. Plus, as crazy as it sounds, when I think of the ending to "Ponyville Confidential" with the CMC being forgiven all over town, I think of the ever-heartwarming "Welcome Christmas" from "How The Grinch Stole Christmas" which we all agree is a Christmas classic (and I'm sure that "Hearth's Warming Eve" is destined to go down in history as a Christmas classic as well). I don't know why, but I just think of that song everytime I think of the ending.

 

Another song that I'm thinking of in this case is a song called "Dear Mr. Jesus" which according to TV Tropes is "a hideously overwrought Christian pop/rock song about the evils of child abuse, sung by a six-year-old girl, and it somehow made it to #61 on the Billboard charts." Yeah, in case you haven't figured it out by now, I am a Christian, and eventhough this song may give "Tastes Like Diabetes" vibes, it does more or less remind me of the CMC getting shunned in this episode after word somehow gets out about them being Gabby Gums.

 

I hope I've been informative. ;)

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During the episode, I was a little outraged at the other mane 5, as well as Shining and Celestia. 

So with that, I believe this story is well written. 

Emotions may vary when it comes to the actions taken by Shining, Celestia and the Mane 5. But one thing's for certain, you never disown family, and you never walk out on a friend, no matter how tactless their action.

Believe me, I've seen the episode enough times, especially the ending, to understand. Plus, as crazy as it sounds, when I think of the ending to "Ponyville Confidential" with the CMC being forgiven all over town, I think of the ever-heartwarming "Welcome Christmas" from "How The Grinch Stole Christmas" which we all agree is a Christmas classic (and I'm sure that "Hearth's Warming Eve" is destined to go down in history as a Christmas classic as well). I don't know why, but I just think of that song everytime I think of the ending.

 

Another song that I'm thinking of in this case is a song called "Dear Mr. Jesus" which according to TV Tropes is "a hideously overwrought Christian pop/rock song about the evils of child abuse, sung by a six-year-old girl, and it somehow made it to #61 on the Billboard charts." Yeah, in case you haven't figured it out by now, I am a Christian, and eventhough this song may give "Tastes Like Diabetes" vibes, it does more or less remind me of the CMC getting shunned in this episode after word somehow gets out about them being Gabby Gums.

 

I hope I've been informative. ;)

Well, you seen the episode enough times to know, so I'd say your just about ready. Good luck with that, I look forward to reading it. :)

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(edited)

Emotions may vary when it comes to the actions taken by Shining, Celestia and the Mane 5. But one thing's for certain, you never disown family, and you never walk out on a friend, no matter how tactless their action.

Well, you seen the episode enough times to know, so I'd say your just about ready. Good luck with that, I look forward to reading it. :)

And as I stated previously, it's quite safe to assume that Twilight's peers (her friends, brother, and mentor) each apologized to her one by one offscreen at some point after the Changelings were defeated.

 

Thank you. I'll get started on it whenever I choose. :)

Edited by BlueEyedPegasus
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And as I stated previously, it's quite safe to assume that Twilight's peers (her friends, brother, and mentor) each apologized to her one by one offscreen at some point after the Changelings were defeated.

 

Thank you. I'll get started on it whenever I choose. :)

That pretty much goes without saying. Its either that, or Twilight has an integrity of very impressive strength. Either way, the relationship between Twi and her friends, Celestia and Shining Armor remains strong, thanks be to Luna.

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That pretty much goes without saying. Its either that, or Twilight has an integrity of very impressive strength. Either way, the relationship between Twi and her friends, Celestia and Shining Armor remains strong, thanks be to Luna.

Eeyup.

 

By the way, if you wanna hear the song "Dear Mr. Jesus" for yourself, here's a link:

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-ejCD6ZR0U

 

Whether or not it gives you "Tastes Like Diabetes" vibes, you can let me know. ;)

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Eeyup.

 

By the way, if you wanna hear the song "Dear Mr. Jesus" for yourself, here's a link:

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-ejCD6ZR0U

 

Whether or not it gives you "Tastes Like Diabetes" vibes, you can let me know. ;)

Oh! Sweet Celestia, the feels, the feels! Five minutes in and I couldn't take it! I think I have diabetes now, and it gets worse, diabetes only feels good when you get it from Fluttershy! Ohhh........

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Oh! Sweet Celestia, the feels, the feels! Five minutes in and I couldn't take it! I think I have diabetes now, and it gets worse, diabetes only feels good when you get it from Fluttershy! Ohhh........

I'm sorry you feel that way. :(

 

Anyhoof, I really hope to get started on this story soon, and I really intend for it to be genuinely heartwarming for all those who expected to see the other ponies apologize for how they shunned the CMC.

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  • 5 weeks later...

Mmmph, I've reviewed the story again today, and I don't think I touched on the main points of Twilight's agony very well. I did mention that Shining cast her out, that her friends broke her heart, and that Celestia shattered her soul, but what I didn't touch on was that Twilight never mentioned the fact to her friends that when they abandoned her, they left both Canterlot and her life at risk, which is why I'm wondering if I should revise the story, from the point where Celestia told Twilight she had a real wedding to put together. What do you guys think?

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(edited)

I've decided to revamp the story, not from the very beginning, but from where Twilight begins displaying the effects of her fallout from the rehearsal. Stay tuned, Chapter 2 will come along at some rate, I guarantee it ;)

 

However, I'm going to have to do a lot of thinking before anything happens, get back in the mood. But don't worry, I'll get on this, so stick around!

Edited by Firebolt Blitz
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  • 4 weeks later...

this is good please continue I mean this is more realistic then the episode

 

but it would have been more fun if Cadence had said this

 

"Now, if you all excuse me, there's a heartbroken, distraught little pony that I have to see to, and you can all forget about me marrying Shining Armor,  In fact, if I were you, I wouldn't speak to Twilight at all, you have a lot to think about"

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this is good please continue I mean this is more realistic then the episode

 

but it would have been more fun if Cadence had said this

 

"Now, if you all excuse me, there's a heartbroken, distraught little pony that I have to see to, and you can all forget about me marrying Shining Armor,  In fact, if I were you, I wouldn't speak to Twilight at all, you have a lot to think about"

That is a good quote to throw in alright, but I wouldn't want Cadance to call off the wedding just because Twilight got hurt. Besides, if I did put that in, I'd be copying another ACW fanfic floating around on FiMFiction, and I don't want to do that. I want to make this entirely original, to the point where nothing is the same as the other fanfics that revolve around an alternate ending to the episode. Anyway, thanks for that. I'll try to implement it in another form.

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*speechless for several minutes*

 

you used the quote i suggested, man I'm so honored

 

I thought you said you weren't gonna used that in your story

Heh, yeah. I did say I wasn't going to use it, buuut an ending with the quote in tow quickly visualized itself in my mind, and I was like "Ah screw it, I'll throw it in anyway". What I'm hoping now is that I'll still receive the same reviews as before, if not slightly better.

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Heh, yeah. I did say I wasn't going to use it, buuut an ending with the quote in tow quickly visualized itself in my mind, and I was like "Ah screw it, I'll throw it in anyway". What I'm hoping now is that I'll still receive the same reviews as before, if not slightly better.

also that episode, well that and turnabout storm is the origin of where I got my personal quote from.... after watching it I now doubt that "the Magic of Friendship" exists

Edited by draph91
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