my MLP fan-fic pt 1 Beginnings and The Sister's Rule Begins

[Song Fire 28]

this is going to be a kind of "prequel" to another one im writing. its also a little bit of headcanon. this part i call

 

                            Begginings

 

Long ago, before Princess Celestia came to rule, and before Equestria was named, the land now known as Equestria was twice its size as it is now.  It was known as Pongea. As far as anyone who lived there knew, it was the only land mass on the planet. The two alicorn rulers of this land were king Blazing Sun and queen Starry Night. The three tribes; the earth ponies, the pegasi, and the unicorns, all lived together in different provinces and cities throughout the land. The king and queen had appointed governors over provinces and mayors over cities and towns. A few thousand years into their reign, Queen Starry Night had a beautiful Colt. They named him Equinox, for he was born on the equinox. Equinox was a pitch black colt, with moonstone white eyes. Other young ponies tended to avoid him, except for a special little pegasus named Solstice. Who seemed to like Equinox a little more than just a friend.  A few years after Equinox was born, Starry Night gave birth to a filly. They named her Celestia. A few years after the princess was born, the queen once again became pregnant. Equinox and Solstice were having a play date at the palace when the capitol was attacked by evil. King Blazing Sun told the queen to take the children inside and to stay safe. The king fought the evil spirits who (when they did talk it was to manipulate) referred themselves as the nightmare forces. The queen was in pain. The baby was coming and she knew it. There was a pounding on the door of the room they were in.  The queen and the three children (soon to be four) hurried to the west side of the castle. The little filly that she named Luna was born moments before the ground started to tremble. A gap began to grow on the floor. The queen hurried the children to the other side and gave Luna to Celestia. She hurried to get equinox and his friend across but the gap was to wide and she was too exhausted to fly.  The two foals were trapped on the side that was breaking away from the land.  Forgetting they could fly they just looked at the queen sadly mouthing ‘goodbye’. Meanwhile in the battle outside the castle the nightmare forces had made entire country split in two. They had defeated Blazing Sun and he had fallen into the canyon that was separating the country. It was far into the night when this had happened. Some wise unicorns had begun to raise the sun with all their magic, something that normally only Blazing Sun could do. The nightmare forces saw their home, the moon, leaving the sky and fled back to the moon from which they came. Celestia and Luna not being old enough to understand what just happened just sat there looking at they’re mother, who picked them up, and flew to the courtyard. She set them down and searched for Blazing Sun. when he was not found, she assumed the worst. So she decided to go search for the other half of the country which had floated off beyond sight distance taking her son with it. She cast a spell on the part of the country that had not floated off. That if she didn’t return within a few days, that the land would forget the royal family, and everything that had happened that day. She told Celestia to be a good girl while she was gone and to take care of her sister. Then she flew off looking for the other half of the country, and her son. That was the last the two sisters saw of they’re mother….

 

 

part 2; the sister's rule begins

 

The last thing I remember is myself holding my sister, Luna. It was as if nothing before that had happened. I remember feeling alone, like I had no meaning. But then I looked at my baby sister. I knew she needed me. We were in a room with only three walls. And we were a few feet away from the ocean. It looked as if the land that had the other wall had broken off from the mainland. Something inside me told me to head to the mountains. So that’s what I did. I set Luna on my back and started up into the mountains. I found a spring with lots of berries and plants. I made a little hut out of leaves and sticks I found. There were plenty of plants that grew themselves so we were never hungry. After five years I thought Luna was old enough for us to go exploring the rest of the mountains.

“Tia?” Luna asked one day

“Are there other ponies in these mountains?”

“I don’t know” I replied “let’s go find out”

“really?! Yes!! Let’s go explore! Let’s go explore!” Luna was exited and packed her things quickly.

“Don’t pack to fast” I told her “you might forget something”

after we got packed and strapped on saddle bags we made from strong leaves, I braided some vines to make a few ropes “well probably need these climbing up the mountains” the weather didn’t get bad until the second day. We were in a blizzard near one of the mountain peaks

“I see a cave!” Luna yelled over the storm. We had tied ourselves together so we wouldn’t get separated

“I can’t see it!” I yelled back “walk towards it! I’ll follow!” she headed to the cave that she saw

“I’ll go in first” I told her “to make sure it’s safe.” I walked in the dark cave. The sound of my hooves was the only sound except Luna and mine’s breathing. Then I heard a noise.

“Is anyone in here?” I asked the cave. Then I saw a shadow run by

“we just wanted to get out of the blizzard. If we came into somepony’s home I’m really sorry.” I heard a muffled sound. Then a small creature crawled out of the shadows. He was and still is a young draconequus. I faintly remembered someone reading me a book about them. They are creatures or ponies that were manipulated by a dark spirit and were changed.

“Hello. I’m Celestia. And this is my sister, Luna.” I pulled on the rope that kept us together and Luna walked in.

“Tia, what is that?” she asked. She was hiding behind me.

“It’s ok Luna. He’s a draconequus. He looks friendly.” Luna came out from behind me. “

What’s your name?” I asked the small creature

 

“I... I’m Discord” he said shyly

 

“are you lost like us?” Luna asked Discord. The draconequus nodded.

 

“We’ve been living up here for a long time.” I told him

 

“I… I lost my parents.” Said Discord “At least I think I did. I don’t remember anything before I transformed into…. This.” Me and Luna felt sorry for him and asked if he would like to join us on our search for other ponies

 

“maybe we’ll find other draconequus’.” So we traveled with discord for a few years. We found food along the way. Berries and such. When we saw six ponies. Two earth ponies (one dressed strangely if I might add), two unicorns, and two pegesi. They were putting down a flag. They seemed nice but we didn’t want to bother them. We followed them to some kind of courthouse. They seemed to be trying to pick a leader

 

“I AM a commander after all. I should be the ruler!” said a pegases.

 

“Well I’M a princess! I should be ruler” said a unicorn.

 

“Well I’m a…! Hmm I got nothing. But I should be ruler!” said the earth pony who was dressed strangely. They argued a few more minutes. Luna, Discord, and I were looking in a window. When one of the pegesi saw us. Discord ducked and ran away. Luna and I didn’t notice. The pegases opened the window and stared at us. She picked us up and took us down to the table. The three ponies that were arguing didn’t notice but they’re friends did.

 

“Aww. They’re so cute!” said the earth pony

 

“They’re alicorns. I thought they were a myth!” said the unicorn.

 

“We have to tell the leaders” said the pegases that picked us up. They tried to get their leaders attention but they were…. Distracted.

 

“I should be leader!”

 

“No me!”

 

“Me!”

 

they were STILL arguing. Something inside me sparked. I don’t really know what happened but my horn began to glow. Very brightly. Then a spark, like a star, flew from my horn. It landed on the table and glowed brighter. They it just disappeared. All seven ponies, including my sister stared at me.

 

“What is your name, child?” said one of the unicorns

 

“I’m Celestia,” I said “and this is my sister, Luna.” What happened after that is very hazy. They decided that WE should be the rulers. So they taught us everything they knew, and the unicorn’s mentor, Starswirl the Bearded, taught us magic. When we were old enough me and Luna raised and set the sun and moon. And we got our cutie marks. It’s been one hundred years since then. And many of our old friends are now gone. Me and my sister age slower than the three tribes. And every generation we make new friends, and then they are gone. I can’t help thinking about what had happened to Discord. We joined a search party in looking for him. We looked for days but we could not find him. I just hope he’s alright.

 

please tell me what you think and what i could do better

Edited December 4, 2013 by Song Fire

[owlnight 11]

it good love it now I have to do 100 charecters now so keep a look out for mine 

[Song Fire 28]

mkay! (stupid 20 charachter thingy)

[Cerise Hood 102]

@@Song Fire

 

Y U No punctuate dialogue correctly?

 

When making a single statement/phrase for speech, the format is "Let's go to the cave,"

Or, "Okay,".

 

Also, every time a different character speaks, you have to create a new paragraph.

 

Great job so far.

[Song Fire 28]

oh... i live in Kentucky XD my homeschool didn't say that XD