Something triggered a repressed memory of mine tonight,, of someone I'd rather forget all together...and now I'm in a rather depressed mood, thinking about what they did to me, thinking of how they treated me like I was no one to them....this isn't the first time it's happened either.stupid things that force me to remind myself about him, trigger it. I can go for days or weeks not thinking about it...though sometimes, I happen to read something or hear something, I get reminded of him. This time it was a single line in an RP I was participating in, I didn't even respond back to my RP partner, I just get into a sort of depressed state....like now, while typing this out...only thing I have for comfort are my Fluttershy plushies, though even cuddling her doesn't help sometimes...so then I usually just go to bed sad, with her, if it's any kind of late hour, and I"ll be doing that when I finish typing this...

I just sigh heavily when ever I think about it, though, I don't want to admit it, I get rather suicidal as well. I've never attempted it, but I've thought about it a lot.....at this point, right now, I've gone from being depressed from repressed memories, to just being generally depressed, and not wanting to talk to anyone directly, hence this blog...where it may or may not get read.

Anyways...this was more of a vent blog than anything...I just wanted to get this out there. I'm not in a really caring mood at the moment. I'll probably of regretted typing this out by the time I come back on tomorrow anyways....So...yea...good night....