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  2. Avatar tag: shipping
    I keep hearing this line being thrown out there like a harbinger of doom. "EG is making Hasbro more money! FiM is dead! Abandon ship!" What's my reaction upon first hearing this news? AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!11!1!1!1!!!2. DO NOT WANT!!!! SAVE A LIFEBOAT FOR ME!!!!
     
    But a funny thing happened, I thought about what they were saying. The claim is that the EG toy line is a more profitable product than their ponies. It sounds alarming at first, I know I shat a few bricks, but let's take a deep breath, change our pants, and take a look at this a little closer.
     
    By "more profitable product" they mean that they are making more money per unit than any other product they make. However, "most profitable product" is NOT the same as "most profitable product line".
     
    Let's take a look at the EG dolls. They usually retail for around $20. Between manufacturing costs, packaging, shipping, marketing, etc they probably cost around $12 to produce. That's a profit of $8 a unit. Not bad, not bad at all.
     
    Let's take a look at your standard brushable pony. They usually retail around $7. Let's look at costs: they've had 20 years of experience in how to lower the manufacturing costs, packaging is smaller than the dolls and therefore cheaper, shipping is less because they can pack more ponies in a box than dolls, and the brand has been around for 20+ years so it's well established and needs little marketing. With all that taken into consideration, the ponies probably cost about $3 to make. A profit of $4
     
    Only $4 per pony? The EG dolls make double that! Abandon ship! Well hold on. While the dolls make more money per unit, they're also more expensive to buy. Let's say a kid is given $25 for her birthday and she needs her pony fix. She goes to the store and sees a Rainbow Dash EG doll for $20. Perfect! But she also sees a Rainbow Dash pony for $7. And an Applejack pony for $7. And a Twilight pony for $7. That's $21, I have enough for 3 ponies! Yay!
     
    If she buys the EG doll, Hasbro will make $8. If she buys the ponies, Hasbro makes $12. See where I'm going with this? Toys are a volume game. They need to sell as many toys as they can to make money. Therefore cheaper toys make them more money. Plus, the pony line has been established for years. Mothers who grew up with the ponies are going to get their kids what they grew up with: Ponies! Not the dolls.
     
    It's like Chevy and Cadillac for GM. Cadillacs make more money per unit for GM, but the volume of sales Chevy has makes way more money. Does that mean Chevy is going to get rid of either one? Hell no!
     
    Whether you like EG or not, EG is the one that has to prove its worth here. It's a new IP in an over saturated market. The ponies are a long established guaranteed seller that makes bank when there's a show to support it. So let's all breathe easy knowing that FiM and it's ponies aren't going anywhere.
  3. Avatar tag: shipping
    I can't remember the exact date, but it's been one year since that day. The day my whole life changed. I was called out to that kid's suicide. I felt helpless and depressed because I knew there was nothing I could do. I tried to self medicate the way the other guys on the job do: cigarettes and/or drinking heavily. Not wanting to get caught up in any of that, I reached out to the internet for help. That's when someone mentioned My Little Pony.
     
    Since that day I've had the highest highs: Going to my first convention and making the short list for my dream department. I've also had the lowest lows: The passing of both my dogs I've had since childhood and my aunt's attempted suicide. However, no matter what, pony was always there to either cheer me up. To this day I still get a big goofy ass grin every time I watch an episode.
     
    I've learned to not be judgmental towards others. It's hard to judge someone when you love a show about candy colored magical ponies. I gained the confidence to reach out to others and was rewarded with the privilege of calling some of the most badass people on this forum my friends. Luckily I get meet one of them at BronyCon this year, but I'm hoping I'll be able meet some of the other forum members as well.
     
    I should probably wrap this up. It's 1am, I just got home from the station, and I have to be up in a few hours to go to my other job. Goodnight y'all! I just wanted to say thank you for making the last year one hell of a ride. Here's to another year!
  4. Avatar tag: shipping
    Good evening everyone! I'm back, here we go again. I was going to do this yesterday, but duty calls and I was at the station. Let me go over to the shelf and let's see what I'm going to listen to and then ramble about...
     
    Well it's about damn time! I ended up with something less obscure!
     
    Meaty Beaty Big and Bouncy by The Who. A compilation album of singles, most of which that were unavailable on any other 33. It was released in October of 1971. The title is supposedly referring to Roger, Keith, John, and Pete respectively. I read that on the internet so who knows if it's true.
     
    The cover is a gatefold. Or at least the original pressings were. I have one of those, but I will be playing a later reissue for this. The front cover has a black and white photo of 4 little bastards hanging out on a front stoop. The window next to them has the 4 band members looking out at the kids in full glorious color. The whole shtick was about them looking back at their earlier lives. Why? The original name for this record was 'Looking Back'. Now the cover makes sense. The gatefold has a picture of the Railway Hotel, a pub they played regularly back in the day. There's a poster pimping a Who performance in 1964 for on the wall. Fits well with the original name of the album. The back cover is the opposite of the front cover. The band members hanging out on the stoop in color and the bastards looking out at them in black and white. It's a neat cover, suitable for framing. OK, time to pump the jams!
     
    I Can't Explain: Starting off with a classic song about the feel called lub. Their first single as The Who. It's pretty tame by Who standards. Still bad ass though. Full of early 60's crappy sound quality.
     
    The Kids Are Alright: Wow, another single! Imagine that! Jingly jangly guitar sound. Drums are a little more aggressive this time around. It's about the whole mod scene, teenage angst, and about his girl. Cliche by today's standard but it's a classic.
     
    Happy Jack: This one was on 'Happy Jack', because 'A Quick One' was way to suggestive for an album title in 1964. If they could only see us now... It's a goofy one. Playful but a little dark. It's about little shits picking on a beach bum. Heavy drums and bass, a taste of things to come. Looks like Keith tried to sneak in some singing in this one, but he got caught.
     
    I Can See for Miles: From 'The Who Sell Out' comes a trippy ass one. A song about a guy catching his girl cheating on him. It seems to me they were going for a raga rock sound but using western instruments. It has lots of drone, bends, and busy drums. It's close but not close enough. That being said, it's one of my all time favorite Who songs.
     
    Pictures of Lily: Ha! A song about a kid getting prons from his dad. When he falls in love with her, he asks his dad about her. Turns out she's been dead for years! Original troll dad? Possibly. Trollolololol...
     
    My Generation: Do I really need to say anything about this one? First bass solo. Studdering. Pete using a microphone stand as a slide. Nuf said.
     
    The Seeker: Remeber this from Rock Band? Yeah, that was the first time I had heard of this one too. He's looking for something, not sure what. Inspiration? Drugs? Ass? Who knows. It mentions some high profile people at the time. Much like that Simon and Garfunkel song. The one with the long ass name.
     
    Anyway, Anyhow, Anywhere: Side 2! It's a call and answer type song. It's about a man doing what he wants, when he want, how he wants. Screw everyone and the horses they rode in on. It's another early tame one.
     
    Pinball Wizard: This was the first Who song I ever heard. It made absolutely no sense to me until I eventually heard the rest of Tommy. It's another one I don't need to say much about. It's the oddball of this album. The rest of the songs except for 'The Seeker' are from their early career. This song is polished and pretty, the others are raw and the sound quality is questionable.
     
    A Legal Matter: A song about divorce! A fresh idea now as it was back then. All about screwing that bitch out of as much money as he can. He loves the wiminz and doesn't want to be tied down anymore. Pretty much a vocalization of every married man's thoughts about marraige.
     
    Boris the Spider: This is a weird one. Kind of a twisted nursery rhyme. Very dark and very very bass heavy. John sings lead on this one, including the low growl of the chorus. I hate spiders. A lot. Even songs about spiders make my skin crawl. He killed it! Mega win!
     
    Magic Bus: An acid trip about a bus. A guy wants to buy a bus to drive to visit his girlfriend. Who wants to buy a damn bus for a vehicle? Unless you're stoned out of your mind. This song is actually different from the rest of their early songs. It has claves to keep the beat and uses an acoustic guitar for most of it. The version on this album is an alternate cut. It's much different than the single version. I prefer the single.
     
    Substitute: A guy wants to be with some chick, but she's taken. It's a pretty typical Who song, heavy bass and drums. Ooo, acoustic guitar. Rare for an early Who song. It seems that they had to force lyrics in to make everything rhyme. They don't quite make sense from time to time.
     
    I'm A Boy: Um, this is different. I have know idea what is going on here. I don't get the lyrics. OK, I used the internet on this one. Apparently it was part of a scrapped rock opera about parents in the future being able to chose their kid's gender. The kid is born a boy but the family wanted a girl. The mom is in denial and makes the boy act like a girl... OK then...
     
    That was a pretty good record. Much better than the first 2 I ended up with. Let's take a look in the book. Alrighty then, an original Decca pressing should run you $30 in near mint and a MCA reissue is about $8. That's typical of anything, originals are worth more. $30 bucks for a record is nothing compared to some I have in my collection. I have a hella rare album stashed away that is worth an ass load. It's not a Beatles 1st state butcher cover, but it's damn close. If this little thing I'm doing here turns out well, I may have to break it out. Maybe to mark a milestone or something, who knows.
     
    Back on topic here. Most of these songs are available on greatest hits albums so buying this one isn't usually required. If you happen to come across the CD in your travels or are contemplating downloading it, ask yourself these questions:
     
    Do I like The Who?
    Do I like classic rock?
    Is it cheap?
     
    If you answered yes to any of those questions, then go for it. You definately won't be disappointed if you pick this one up. Since most of the songs are from their early career, a lot of them sound very similar. But they each have something that makes them special and worth a listen. All right y'all, that's gonna call it a night. Later.
  5. Avatar tag: shipping
    So yeah, my mom has been bitching at me for sleeping all the time. As soon as I get home from work, I take a nap. I'm always in my room. Stuff like that. First, maybe a little background is needed.
     
    I have moved back in with my parents while I'm in paramedic school. My thinking was if I live with them they can help me stay focused with studying, I can work less and do more clinicals, and all of that would decrease my stress level. Well, I was wrong. I'm still working as much if not more than before I started school.
     
    You may be asking yourself, "What's the big deal? So you have to work and go to school. Waa. Everybody does it. Quit your bitching." Granted, I'm not the only person in this world that has worked his ass off to get through school. Visiting any titty bar will prove that. But I'm quite sure my situation isn't like everyone else's.
     
    My week generally goes like this:
     
    Every Monday and Wednesday night I have school. It goes from 6PM to 10PM. Not too bad, it gives my brain a hell of a workout but it's only 2 nights a week. It's usually split between 2 hours of lecture and 2 hours of lab time. Lecture is obvious, the captain tells us stuff and we regurgitate it on or tests. Lab is sticking my classmates with needles, reading EKG strips, doing chest decompressions, dissections, what have you.
     
    Monday through Friday I work in the family business repairing showers and bathtubs. It's pretty self explanatory, I go all over the area and fix busted tubs. It's a long day of manual labor in places ranging from dirty warehouses to million plus homes and everything in between. It pays well enough, and if that's all I had to do I wouldn't be here venting. But this is a family business. I.e. my dad owns it. I.e. when he retires, I will own it. So besides doing the repair work, I have to help my dad run the business as well. Anyone that owns their own business knows what a nightmare that is. The best part? This is my part time job.
     
    For my full time job, I'm an EMT. I work for a rural EMS department north of the city. It doesn't pay as well as you might think, but it is an absolute blast. I've seen and done things most people never will. That can be good or bad depending on the situation. It gives me a sense of pride and purpose every morning I suit up and head to the station. The shifts are 16 hours long from 8AM to midnight. Being a rural service, we usually don't get too many calls. Between the 2 rigs, there are usually 5 or less. But when you factor in that because of the long transport distances most calls last about 2 hours from tone out to back in house, our days can be quite busy. If not on a call, we are free to do whatever we want. Eat, watch TV, cruise around, and most importantly: sleep. But we can't just sleep, you must keep your ears open the whole shift. Sleep to us is resting your eyes. Not very restful but better than nothing. You must be wondering: "When do you have time to this? You already have a 9 to 5." That, my friends, would be the 2 days a week I don't fix tubs. Saturday and Sunday. Some weeks I get lucky and it's Saturday OR Sunday with a weekday, replacing a day fixing tubs. But more often than you would think, it's Saturday AND Sunday. I just did that this past weekend. You know what that means don't you? 13 days straight of working.
     
    So now maybe you understand why I sleep so damn much. I've been working 10 days straight with 3 three more to go. Between the stress of school and both of my jobs, sleep and ponies are pretty much the only things that keep me going. When I finish school and get promoted, I told my dad I will be taking a break from fixing tubs to relax. At first my goal was to earn my paramedic license. Maybe what I'm really working towards is some time off...
  6. Avatar tag: shipping
    I got to say, the last moth has shaped up to be pretty exciting. Starting with Midwest Brony Fest, I haven't had that much fun in a LONG time. A weekend to be my true brony self. I found some awesome merch that I couldn't find anywhere else, I won a Derpy funko figure in a gameshow, and I met some pretty cool people. All of this was done in secret. I told no one where I went and no matter how much they prodded, they never found out. Well, almost. I turned off location services on my phone and got a hotel on hotels.com. I wanted to pay cash for everything so they wouldn't know where I went. It worked, until I got drunk at the hotel bar and put the bill on my room. The room that was tied to my debit card. So yeah, they know I was in Overland Park. But they still don't know what I was doing there, so it wasn't a total fuck up.
     
    Code3 Bronies has been going quite well. Meirno and I have started making our forum and it should be up and running any time now. Even though it's a brony forum, it's still a niche site. It will never replace this forum. This place has been waaaaay too good to me to just up and leave. I may be less active (relatively speaking, my post count may be fairly low but I'm here everyday) when it finally does get finished, but I'll still be here posting and browsing. Another shameless plug: If any public safety bronies are reading this, head over to:
     
    http://code3bronies.freeforums.org/
     
    and join up. Civilian bronies are welcome too!
     
    The past month has also seen a massive shopping spree. I had been busting my ass so I can finally have some things I've always wanted. The earphones that came with my iphone had been getting the job done. But a year of pumping jams had begun to wear them out. So I bought a pair of Beats tour. I don't understand the hate for Beats. They look good and sound amazing, that's why I bought them. Sure they were expensive but it's a night and day difference between the two. Subtle sounds that were buried and muddy on my old earphones come through crystal clear on the Beats. Plus the bass thumps in your head, I'm happy with them.
     
    I changed out the exhaust tips on my car as well. I had dual exhaust put on last year, but I couldn't afford an extra $160 for Mopar tips. So I just picked a $40 pair off of the shelf. Bad move. They looked big on the shelf, but I didn't realize how massive my car really is. They looked sooooo tiny! When my birthday came around, I got a set of Mopar tips. Now it actually looks good!
     
    I also have been able to purchase a few guns that I've always wanted. I was in the market for a magnum revolver, specifically a S&W Model 29. But I just could not find one. At all. I was about to settle for a Ruger Super Redhawk when I spied the first gun of the month. A Colt Trooper Mk. III in .357 magnum. I had always wanted a Colt and I instantly fell in love with it. I wasn't able to talk them down on the price, but they gave me a free hard case when they saw my badge. It's now my bedside gun for when something goes bump in the night. For a birthday present/work bonus, I was given a Springfield 1911 last week. For me, 1911s are the ultimate handgun. Yes even better than a Glock. A few days ago I was given the opportunity to buy a Ruger Redhawk with a custom trigger job for a hell of a deal. But I turned it down, I really wanted a Model 29 like Dirty Harry. I am glad I did because today was the gun show. Just before I was going to leave, I found it. A blue S&W Model 29 44 magnum. It's a 4 in (Dirty Harry had a 6.5 in) but it's the only Model 29 I have seen in a loooooong time. So I snatched it up as quick as I could. They knocked $25 bucks off of the price when they saw my badge too. So for only $25 more than the Redhawk I got my 29. Mega win!
     
    So yeah, fun month.
  7. Avatar tag: shipping
    OK everyone, today's report is about an iPhone 5 case. More specifically, an iPhone 5 Deflector case from Redbubble. I picked this case up because I got the shaft on my first case. I bought the iPhone 5 on release day so the only cases that existed were Speck cases at the AT&T store. And of course they were at a price reflecting that exclusivity... $40! Yes bricks were shat, but what's a man to do? So I bought it and the damn thing practically disintegrated on me. So I was in the market for a new case and decided that I had to have something pony, but nothing that was painfully obvious. I'm still in the stable mind you! After searching high and low I found Redbubble. Then I found it, a case with best princess on the dl:
     

     
    Then I looked at the price... $40! Again?! But I fell in love with it and had to have it, so I ponied up the cash. (pun halfway intended) A few days and witty emails later, it finally arrived!
     
    Packaging...
     
    It arrives in a white cardboard box with "Uncommon" printed on it. It turns out these cases are made by a company called Uncommon using art posted on Redbubble. Inside the box is a receipt, Redbubble sticker, and the case surrounded in what is best described as a blister pack that didn't get sealed. I'm sure it's intended to be that way and it's genius! I cannot tell you how many times I have been called out to patch someone up because they tried to open one of those things up and cut their fingers to the bone. Bravo Redbubble! The packaging kept it well secured and cushioned so it gets a plus 1. Extra point for the plastic shell. So yeah, they did a good job with this one!
     
    The case...
     
    The case is a one piece made of slick hard plastic. So if you've got butterfingers, this may not be the case for you. But the rest of us will find a case that meets our needs. One thing to keep in mind is that this is NOT an Otterbox or Lifeproof. It only provides the most basic protection to your phone. Only the back, corners and the left and right sides are covered. All buttons, the jacks, the screen, and the silent switch are all uncovered. That being said, the edges are thick enough that if you drop it you won't hurt any of the aforementioned parts. But the only reason I bought this was for the art, and it's gorgeous. To the uninitiated, they can't tell what they're looking at. I've been told it looks like an eyeball. But we know what's up. It is made of white plastic, then the desired art is applied, then a clear coat is applied. So not only does it shine, it's soft. And except for a tiny fish-eye when you look for it at an angle, the finish is flawless. The last test was to see if the thing actually fit my phone. Some cases out there don't fit quite well and will wiggle a bit in the case. Not this one. It fits so snug, I'm not sure I can get it back out without breaking the case. Perfect. I'm loving this case so far, but next up is the most important test...
     
    The field test...
     
    Here on Field Reports, I put everything through a field test. Oooh, you must be thinking, everyone does that. Well, yes. Yes they do. If you think bringing something to your desk job or fetching coffee is a field test. Well that's fine and all but I don't have a desk job or like coffee so that doesn't do me any good. So I put it through a real field test. The field test for the case involved 10 shifts on an ambulance, 15 days fixing broken tubs, a couple trips to the shooting range, and Midwest Brony Fest. At the station, my phone is used the whole time I'm not on a call. Music, games, interbutts, you name it. When I'm on a call I do all sorts of things like crawl into wrecked cars, search burning buildings, do CPR, and all sorts of other fun stuff. It gets tossed around, banged into, and who knows what gets on it. Fixing tubs has me on my knees in a bathroom, using very strong chemicals, and lots and lots of fine white dust. The shooting range exposes it to gunpowder, oils, solvents, and Celestia knows what else. The con was the light duty test. To see how it handles in a more conventional lifestyle. Is it bulky? Is it comfortable to carry? Will is slip out of your pocket when you sit down?
     
    The results...
     
    After going through hell and back, this thing looks just like it did the day I got it. Well almost. At first glance it seems to be the case. But at an angle you can see scratches in the light. Because it has a clear coat it doesn't scratch the artwork. So the art is pristine and unless you look at a weird angle you can't see the scratches! +1! It still fits snug and tight as well. Between the ambulance, fixing tubs, and the range all sorts of chemicals touched it. The worst of which are acetone, gelcoat, and barrel solvent that has destroyed cases in the past. After many exposures, acetone or solvent didn't melt it and gelcoat wouldn't stick! +1! Many hours of carrying the phone at the con and sitting at the station, I've had no problems with it falling out or getting uncomfortable. It's so light, you almost forget you have it in your pocket. I'm serious, I freaked out for a sec at the con because I couldn't feel it. The only negative I found was when I dropped it in the back of the rig. It landed on the corner and it made it through the clear coat. Because the case is printed, the color doesn't go all of the way through like other molded cases. So now there are a few small white spots on one corner. Meh.
     
    The verdict...
     
    By Luna this is an amazing case! I was worried at first. Companies know that they can slap ponies on anything and we'll pay whatever to have it. I was worried that it may be a piece of shit. But I was thoroughly surprised to find a strong, comfortable, and beautiful case that any brony would be proud to own. Though the $40 price tag may seem expensive at first for a basic case, but it's worth it. It's a damn tank. Redbubble has tons of beautiful art to choose from so definitely check them out if you haven't done so already. You're sure to find something that you will love.
     
    Tl;dr: Buy it.
  8. Avatar tag: shipping
    Yes, I am one of those guys. The day the iPhone 5 was released I stood outside my local AT&T store so I could be one of the first to have one. (Protip: The lines are waaaaay shorter at the carrier's store than at the Apple store. I showed up 10 til and was like 12th in line. 30 min later I walked out with my phone. Some miserable bastards camped out at the Apple store for days to get 12th in line.). With a phone upgrade available and a wad of cash burning a hole in my wallet, I proceeded to purchase my shiny new toy. The salesperson tried to go over options with me but I didn't want to hear it. 16gb! Black! Shut up and take my money! Then she asked if I wanted a case... Uh oh, I didn't have a case for my new phone! Bwah! "Have no fear!" The lady proclaimed, "we have a fine selection of cases to choose from! All at prices that reflect the fact that this phone has only been on sale for 30 minutes!" I found myself a $10 red Speck case at the bargain basement price of $40 and went in my merry way.
     
    Fast forward to a few weeks ago. That cheap piece for crap is scratched to hell, the rubber on the inside cushioning the phone has pretty much peeled away, chunks are missing from the plastic, and all after just under a year of use. Now lets be fair... The amount of wear and tear I put my phone and phone accessories is probably enough to void the warranty. Between climbing into wrecked cars, searching burning buildings, trekking through the jungle (both concrete and forest), and mixing chemicals that will probably give me cancer someday, I need one of those mil spec cases with side impact crumple zones and a steel plate on the back. Or at least a life proof or otterbox. Though those are fine cases, there's one problem... Dey's 'spensive! And unless you like bright yellow or black, dey's fugly too! So set out to find a new case that could handle what I dish out...
     
    I found plenty of review sites for iPhone cases, a metric ass tonne to be precise. But they all seem to have something I common. Their "abuse" test is useless. Oh, you dropped your phone from 3 feet? That's good to know... If I was 3.5 feet tall. You hit it once with a hammer? Cool story bro! I can probably run a case over with my car once and it would probably hold up. Some have the audacity to claim an "abuse" test is them taking a case along with them for a week in their life as a pencil pusher. Once I realized my search was futile, I came to realize that this is actually an opportunity! I'm surely not the only one who has had this problem.
     
    Since I couldn't find a review that actually addressed my needs, I threw caution to the wind and bought a new case. I picked up a Luna Splatter Mark case from Redbubble. I'm happy with it so far, but how well will it stand up to abuse? Well my Bronies, we will soon find out. I will be starting a new blog...
     
    Field Reports with Firestorm will be a new type of review. It will be an atypical review for those living an atypical life. Those living a typical life need not fret. If that thing you've had your eye on can survive hell with me, it can surely meet your needs. It won't strictly be a case review blog, it will be on tech in general. Headphones, vidya games, and what have you. If it has pony on it, then it's fair game. That also means if you have your eye on something and you want me to check it out first, let me know and I'll have a whack at it.
     
    The first Field Report will be on my new case. I'm not sure when it will be, maybe tomorrow but most likely after this weekend. Midwest Brony Fest baby! This is going to be pretty cool. Not only will it be from a practical point of view, but also a fellow brony's point of view. Lets do this...
  9. Avatar tag: shipping
    Yes my Bronies, it's almost time! In less than 2 weeks my happy ass will be at Midwest Brony Fest! (cheers and applause!!1!) It's been a crazy year I tell ya hwat. I've been through hell and back but I made it damn it! I've often thought what would happen if I could go back in time exactly one year. To go up to myself and tell me what will happen in the next 12 months. There is no way in hell I would believe myself. It would probably go something like this:
     
    "Hey!"
    "Who the hell are you?"
    "I'm you from one year in the future!"
    "No."
    Past self walks away... Or pull out my gun... Whichever's funnier.
     
    But seriously, telling myself that in the next 12 months I will graduate 2nd in my EMT class (got beat out by 1 percent by a damn pre med student), start my career in a podunk little county EMS dept, start paramedic school, both of my dogs will pass away, become a brony, and now am going to a fucking my little pony convention would probably overload my brain. But Luna help me, here I am. And I am damn happy to be here. Though making it to this point involved my heart breaking and seeing/doing things no person should ever have to see/do, those things provided the excuse for me to try this girly little show.
     
    Back on topic! Yes, Midwest Brony Fest! My first convention ever. I have been looking forward to this for months now (just before best pony turned into a princess), and it's so close... Close enough to start final preparations but far enough away to still have time to order some swag. Yes I know they will be pimping shit at the convention. But as a closet brony, I have no pony gear save for 5 blind bag ponies. But that all changed this weekend. Up until Sunday, I only had my ticket. But I needed swag. Sure, I could go in everday clothes but this is my chance to actually be myself. So with the hope of finding something good, I headed to Hot Topic. Up until that point, I had no reason to go into a Hot Topic. I don't wear pony clothes, I don't have pony accessories, and their blind bag prices are outrageous! But in need of pony, I went and found a Derpy bracelet and a Rainbow/Brony bracelet. I was looking for a cover for my phone, specifically the Luna one I saw on EQD. But that was nowhere to be found. When I bought them, I got some strange looks. Maybe because I was in my government issue shirt. Who knows.
     
    Next up was Spencer's! Less likely to find pony there, but it was down the street so why not? I was right. Very limited selection of pony. But I did find Dashie earbuds. So now I pump my jams in style. Whoa. As I'm typing this, Stargazer by Rainbow started up on my phone. Listening to Rainbow with Rainbow headpones. Rainbowception.
     
    Though I was happy with what I bought, I still never found that phone cover. So when I got home I hit the interbutts. Everytime I used the google, I kept ending up at or be suggested to look on Redbubble. That's where I found the Luna splatter cutie mark case. It's subtle enough that no one but fellow bronies should pick up on it. Celetia's splatter cutie mark case is pretty bad ass too, especially with red being my favorite color, but I gotta go with best princess. It should be here next week, so very excite!
     
    Ticket? Check.
    Swag? Check.
    Headphones? Check.
    Phone case? Check.
    Money? Check.
     
    Now just one last thing: a hotel. Sure, I only live 30 minutes from the convention. But that Friday and Saturday night, I will be drinking and partying. So I could either stumble to a hotel room that is connected to the convetion center, or drive home drunk. And besides, that means I don't have to hide being a brony all weekend.
     
    Hotel? Check.
     
    It's all coming together. I am so ready to get away be amongst my own kind for a weekend. I hope to see some of you all there! I'm sure it's going to be fun on a bun!
  10. Avatar tag: shipping
    I finally have a weekend off from the station. For the past 8 months, I have been working at least one saturday or sunday. I am very excite. Because last weekend was, I think the AVGN puts it best, a shit load of fuck.
     
    Thursday I had to take one of my cars to the shop. It's only 2 years old and the check engine light went off. My other car had to be tagged that day and I didn't have the title yet. I called the dealer and they told me they have had it they whole time, but were waiting on a lien release. They said they would try their best to get it ready that day but no promises. 30 min later they call back and tell me I'm good to go. I was too glad to get it done to get too pissed off. I went by and grabbed the paperwork, I got everything in order, and headed to the DMV. Waited 30 min in there, to learn the dealer never inspected the damn car. Yeah, I was pissed. I got that scheduled for that saturday and picked up my other car from the shop.
     
    Friday I was at the station. I came in early like always and as soon as I walked in we got a call. So I took it. It was for some dipshit that smoked 2 packs a day for 35 years and got COPD... Bad. We ended up running him hot because he was having so much trouble breathing. Next up was a building collapse. Jim Bob and Mary Sue were knocking down an old building in their backyard. Knocked it right on top of her. A wanged head and a broken shoulder. On our way back from that one, we got another. A 22 month old seizing. Probably febrile seizures but we booked it there any way. Turns out to be a 22 month old crack baby that was smaller than her 2 month old healthy brother. It was as sad and pitiful as it sounds.
     
    Saturday I got my car tagged and inspected. I also bought a new gun, a Colt .357 magnum. Mega win!
     
    Sunday I had a fatal mva. A guy crossed the median on the interstate right into oncoming traffic. His face hit the steering wheel of his old pickup and smashed his face in. Pretty bad. The other lady was alive, but had to be choppered out. Then I had some fat fuck with diabeetus. He tested 518 and what did he do? Eat a banana. Yeah. Lastly, I got a 2 year old that nearly drowned in a pool. We got there and got him breathing again but it still made me pucker up. Once I got home, I saw Equestria Girls was on youtube. Better than I was expecting, but Flash Sentry sucks. His character and role served no purpose in the movie. It would have been more of a statement of friendship if the other 5 saved Twi from being framed. Sigh, moving on. I'm getting sidetracked. Just remember, it's not canon...
     
    So yeah, I'm excited to have some time off. At least I WAS excited. I've been thinking about using this time away to look for another department to work for. Don't get me wrong. I love my job. But I've noticed that I don't really fit in there. I've lived in the city all my life and the fire dept raised me. From when I was little all the way up until I got on at my department, I spent a lot of time at my dad's station learning the ropes. When I was old enough to start my own career, I began riding along with them. So all of my previous experience come from riding on the pumper and ambulance in the city. I watched them squeeze their rigs through gaps in traffic that I could have sworn were smaller than the damn rig. All while going highway speeds. I asked them how they could do that. What they told me is pretty much what I strive to do each day.
     
    I believe that being the operator of an emergency vehicle has 3 main responsibilities:
    Get there as quickly as possible.
    Get there as efficiently as possible.
    Get there as safely as possible.
     
    Sure, I do a lot more than drive the bitch. But the main point of contention I have with some of my partners is my driving. They think I don't look as I pull out of the station. They think I drive too fast. They think I don't look as I back in to the station. The 1st and 3rd one are simple. I have ADHD. I can process information very quickly. Looking a half second each way as I pull out allows me to check that it's clear. I know what the street looks like when it's empty. A quick glance will either pick up either movement from a fast moving object (a car) or a form that shouldn't be there (a person). If I see either thing, I stop and look again and make sure everything is clear. When I back in, I pull into the oncoming lane. That way I know that lane is clear and I have an unobstructed view of the other lane. Just in case someone was riding my ass. However, me driving too fast requires a little more.
     
    As the operator of an emergency vehicle, you are given certain legal powers. When running hot, you can break the speed limit. You can run stop lights/signs. You can drive on the wrong side of the road. As long as you maintain full control of your vehicle, you can pretty much do whatever you want. Back to those responsibilities, you must be able to satisfy all 3 on every call. You may be wondering how you can mix going fast and staying safe. Simple. The operator must know his rig inside and out. I know how tall the box is on my rig. I know long my rig is, including the front and back bumpers. I know how wide my rig is. When I come to an intersection and there isn't an open lane, I know the size of my rig so I can choose the appropriate path to take. I also know how fast my rig can go. I know how fast my rig can stop. I know how my rig handles. My district is basically centered on a big H. An interstate to the east, a US highway to the west, and a state highway in the middle. And my station is smack dab in the middle of that H. Every single call requires me to drive on at least one of those highways. So over time I have come to know them very well. I know every single curve on those highways, and what speed is safe to take it at. Wider curves allow me to go faster. Sharper curves require lower speeds. All of this allows me go at a high rate of speed and still maintain safe control of my rig.
     
    However, it's not all my partners' fault. They all come from a different background than I. They all were born and raised in the country. Life out there is on slow mo. People aren't in a hurry to get anywhere. I can't tell you how many times I've gotten stuck behind Farmer Brown takin' his time while I'm trying to get to work. There's nothing wrong with that lifestyle, sometimes I actually enjoy it myself. But all of them think that lifestyle applies to their job as well. They all seem to think that taking over 20 minutes to get on scene is OK. Their favorite response is "Who else are they gonna call?" or "It's not my emergency, it's theirs". They think that EMS shouldn't involve any dangerous situation. If something looks scary, hide in the rig until the cops deal with it. I was raised and trained that when the bells/tones go off, it's now YOUR emergency. We are the ones following the cops in to a shootout, and the firefighters into burning buildings. If you don't like it, fine. There's the door. We aren't drafted, we choose to do this. Maybe not giving a shit is why the public thinks less of us than the police or fire department. Maybe if they would grow a pair of balls...
     
    Maybe... Maybe I'm fighting an uphill battle. Maybe I should just let them do what they do. If the city was hiring, I would be gone in a heartbeat. But they're not. And won't be anytime soon. I don't know what to do.
  11. Avatar tag: shipping
    The music? Hit and miss...
    The thoughts? Who gives a shit?..
    It's time... for... MUSIC REVIEWS WITH ADHD!!!!!1!
     
    Sorry it took so long to do another one. Not that anyone cares. I have had a hell of a week and that took all of my time. Long story short: DMV, building collapse, crack baby, new gun, dipshit w/ diabeetus, smashed in face, drowning kid, and finally Equestria Girls. Yeah, I've been busy as shit. But I'm back baby. To the stack!
     
    Ooh, this should be good.
     
    There Goes Rhymin' Simon by Paul Simon. Let's just get this out there now... I'm a huge Simon & Garfunkel fan. But not so much of a Simon OR Garfunkel fan. From the stripped down sound of Wednesday Morning, 3A.M. to the polished and intricate sound of Bridge Over Troubled Water, together they are incredible. I can listen to any of their official albums front to back and not find a single bad song. I said 'official' because there is an album called 'The Hit Sounds of Simon and Garfunkel' floating around out there. It's technically a compilation album, but it's made up of unreleased songs from their days as Tom and Jerry. It was released without permission by Pickwick.
     
    Oh by the way! Pro-Tip!!! Except for this one and Introducing the Doobie Brothers, they are worthless. For the love of Celestia and Luna... DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES BUY ANY OTHER ALBUM RELEASED BY PICKWICK!!! Even Elvis records! Even if it's free, you will probably never be able to get rid of it. The only reason those two are valuable is because they were both composed of unreleased demos and were released without permission, so they were pulled shortly after release. But neither are particularly very good so even though they are rare, their value is still in the double digits. Beats the hell out of the value of every other Pickwick out there. Oh, I almost forgot. Yes, I own a copy of 'The Hit Sound of Simon and Garfunkel'. So eventually, if I do this long enough, I will review it. Yay?
     
    Back to the album at hoof! This album was in May, 1973. It was his third solo album, if you count 'The Paul Simon Songbook'. It was released in the UK only in 1965 before the release of 'Sounds of Silence' and their their career skyrocketing. For us in the good ol' US and A, this was the second solo album. It was a huge hit back in the day. It reached #2 on the Billboard chart and was nominated for 2 Grammy Awards. It's hit single was Kodachrome. It reached #2 on the Billboard chart as well, it reached #1 on the Cashbox however so yeah. I got a feel that this is going to be fun.
     
    Uh... Wat? This cover is, what's a good word... Grotesque. It just oozes 70's cheese. The background is white with blue grid lines. Tacked all over the front and back, it's a gatefold by the way, are fugly ass drawings and objects that are supposed to represent some of the songs on the album. I guess they realized that they sucked ass so they tacked the names of the songs next to the drawings/pictures. I could spend lots of time tearing the cover of this one apart, and I would probably enjoy that, but let's move on. The inside cover is plain. A world away from that ass goulash on the front cover. Song titles. Lyrics. Who plays what. Random pictures. All in columns. Yep, that pretty much sums it up. This cover blows. But! We can't judge a book/album/TV show/movie based on said TV show by it's cover now can we?
     
    To the music!
     
    Kodachrome: One of my favorite songs! Kodak got butthurt on this one, they made him put a copyright notice on the damn record. Not the cover, the record itself! Give Kodak a Zima! Stat! Yeah! High school sucks! Next to nothing of what I learned has helped me in the real world. Same goes for my first and second attempts at college. It's true. My lack of education hasn't hurt me either, but older generations look down upon us lazy ass kids that didn't go to/finish college and get a degree in something unrelated to our careers. Color film takes pictures in color? O rly? Oh shit, putting all the girls I've dated in one room would hilarious. All they would do is fight and scream at each other. One wouldn't be there though, or maybe her ghost would... You see where I'm going with this. Hahaha!!! Every guy fapping right now is saying those exact fucking words about their ex gurls! Dem bitches can't beat my imagination! Lulz. Again, with the color film taking taking color photos. I get it. Speeding things up, all right. Fiddle comes out of nowhere, and now it's over. How would you like to be that guy? Sit through the entire song and you're only part is 2 notes once and a while. I'm sure he made bank though.
     
    Tenderness: Huh? It's sounds like it's straight out of Grease. I could imagine John Travolta crooning this to Olivia Newton John at the drive in. No thanks, Kodachrome is hella better.
     
    Take Me to the Mardi Gras: THE Mardi Gras huh? Odd. Ooh, this starts off pretty good. The groove makes you sway. Perfect for a day at the beach. Little bit of trumpet for accent, sounds good. Is the solo a theramin? Maybe steel drums... Nope, electric organ. New Orleans jazz band comes in to finish it off, I like it.
     
    Something So Right: Something tells me this song is about getting some ass. The guitar sounds French. Like Michelle. Nope, just dang ol' love. Pretty generic love song. He almost sounds like Paul McCartney at times. But Paul's love songs are actually good. Scratch that, it's sounds very similar to his love songs. Damn it! I guess the record is scratched, it keeps repeating. Damn vinyl! This is bland. Meh.
     
    One Man's Ceiling is Another Man's Floor: Strange title, but let's hear it. Hmm, it starts off interesting. Aaand it doesn't stay that way. It's kind of bluesy, wait now it's gospely. I still don't get the title yet, the lyrics don't explain it at all. He's yelling the words, attention coming back. And now that damn background choir chimes in again. Meh.
     
    Side 2!!!
     
    American Tune: 'Murica! Fuck yeah! Slow. I expected something fast paced. He's talking about how his life sucks. It's picking up. A dream about dying, depressing. I think it's about patriotism, at least the end is. Screw it. 'Murica! Automatic win!
     
    Was a Sunny Day: A feel good song about a sunny day. Kind of beachy too. It repeats itself a lot. The whole song is only 2 verses repeated. Lazy.
     
    Learn How to Fall: Starts off pretty good, with a good rhythm. It's about failing before you succeed. Not too bad, another short song. Not much to say about it. I like it.
     
    St. Judy's Comet: Hmm, it sounds like it would fit well on 'Bookends'. I think its a lullaby to his son, lucky bastard. I wish someone would write a song for me. It's not bad, very innocent. Also very different from most of the songs he writes. I give it a meh.
     
    Loves Me Like a Rock: Hopefully this goes better. The last few have been too bland to rant about. Oh, what fresh hell is this? Backing choir again. I think this is Dixieland! Yay! I can't rant and bitch! Oh yeah, talkin' about growin' up in the south in the bayou. You definitely know that feel. You're from New York asshole! Gotta squeeze in that anti gummint lyric in there. Wouldn't be vaguely folkish alterna-rock without it!Why am I imagining him singing this song in black face? I'm so racist.
     
    OK! Another record down. Like most of the albums I'll be bitching or boning over, I haven't listened to it in quite a while. Unless I love the record, I usually listen to it once and shelve it. Plus I have a lot of them. I think FiM will be cancelled before I get through all of them. At least at this pace. And I don't plan on speeding things up anytime soon. So yeah. Anywho, last week we didn't have any luck finding the value of our record. Let's try this again. Success! Aw shit, it's not worth much. Stands to reason, it's passible. OK, there are three listings. The quadrophonic release is $20, the original pressing is $10, and the reissue is $8. Yeah, this one ain't worth shit. I have an original that I picked up for a buck. You seeing a pattern here? I raid the cheap bins for these "gems". Now then, should you buy it? Time to ask...
     
    The Three Questions!!!
     
    Are you a Paul Simon fan?
    Are you a fan of vaguely folkish alterna-rock?
    Is it cheap?
     
    Yes to question 1: Go for it!
    Yes to question 2: Dafuq does that even mean? I ripped it off of Futurama. But I digress, go for it.
    Yes to question: 3: Go for it!
     
    Dispite my bitching, it's a decent album. Definitely not up to par with any S & G album, but it could be worse. If you must have a Paul Simon album, I would go with a greatest hits record. Trust me, you won't be missing much. It'll have Kodachrome, and that's all you need off of this one. Alright, that's it. 'Til next time.
  12. Avatar tag: shipping
    Hello again my bronies. It's time again! The review where the music is hit and miss and my thoughts don't matter. I thought about changing things up again. Maybe searching through my stacks of records for something that people might want to know about. I have plenty of popular albums, ones that are mentioned quite often elsewhere in the forums. Once I got to my stacks I took one look and my mind was made up.
     
    Nnnope.
     
    Too lazy. Besides, all of the popular albums have been done a million times already. Maybe I have some hidden gems deep in here, maybe I have a pile of shit. Only one way to find out...
     
    The album that has made it's way to the top of the stack is... The Roaring Silence by Manfred Mann's Earth Band!!! (applause). Yeah, I meh'd as well. OK interbutts, what can you say about this one?
     
    Huh, I expected more. It was released in August 1976, it features a new lead singer, and had a number 1 hit. That's about it. Ok, what I know about it is that it was released twice. Once in August 1976, the second time was sometime in 1977. Why? They had another hit single. Their next album wasn't due for another year so they just tacked it on to this one and reissued it. That means most vinyl copies are the reissue, which is what I have. Next up, my thoughtful art insights.
     
    This cover can't be serious. It has to be making fun of art. This cover reminds me of the King of the Hill episodes that involve art and art accessories. It's just too stupid. It's an ear, with a mouth in the hole. The title of the album and the band's logo is carved into what I can only assume is some poor bastards head. But that's not what I find hilarious. The ear and mouth is just too perfect. You know some asshole out there thinks it's a deep statement on war or famine or... Screw it. I'm bored. Moving on!. The original covers were a peach color. The reissues are bluish grey, and has the names of it's 2 singles in full tacky funkadelic colors on the top. Back cover! 5 circles. Each one with the face and name of a band member carved into it. A bunch of black letter saying who, what, when, where, why. That's it. Lame ass back cover and an artsy front cover. If you're one of those art types, you may like an original copy on your way. Otherwise, leave it on the shelf. Let's pop this fucker in and see what we got.
     
    Blinded by the Light: Ho yeah! Wrapped up like a douche! I don't care what anyone says, that's the real lyric right there! I love this song. I didn't know this was a Springsteen song for many years. On a related note, I have exactly 0 Springsteen albums. I have never and probably never will like his music. He can write well, but can't perform. The exact same goes for Bob Dylan. FYI. Oh, I forgot they made a single cut of this song. I'm listening to the full version. Lots of intrumental stuff. I think I hear some words buried deep in the mix. They're back. Two lead vocals at the same time, some crazy shit here. Hey Manfred Mann finally said something.
     
    Singing the Dolphin Through: Weird name for a song, I usually have bad luck with that. Random wiminz singing the title over and over. Come on now, that's enough. There we go, actual lyrics now! And now back to the title again. Sigh. I can't tell what's more annoying. The repeating title or the sonar ping that keeps going off when they sing it. I think I get it. You know, dolphins and sonar. Wait, I am overthinking this. I don't think this song is even about a damn dolphin. What else can I do? They keep repeating the same thing over and over. Sexophone? OK now, something different! Nope, it's back. Screw this song.
     
    Waiter, There's a Yawn in my Ear: Another weird ass song name. Let's hope this goes well. Yeah, I know. Some strange organ sounds, really strange. The beat has been established! Still organ and hi hat. Some more drums added, but still just organ. I'm thinking this might be an instrumental. Nothing wrong with that. Guitar finally showed up, with a solo. Guitar's gone. Organ and snare now. Guitar's back. Either play or don't, make up your damn mind! OK, random crowd cheer faded in and out. It was better than I expected, but nothing I would put on my phone. Alright, let's flip it!
     
    The Road to Babylon: Starts of with a choir. Not in Engish I see, great way to start this off. Oh, good groove with the bass and drums fade in. It's about war and fighting. Can't go wrong there. Fire! Sing about fire: automatic +1 interbutts. Guitar solo isn't too shabby, lots of bends and shit. This is actually going pretty well. Breaking it down a bit for the main guitar solo, sounds pretty good. Back to the verse! Swords, helmets, and glorious cleansing fire! Dafuq?! The song just stopped! Whatever, I'd seriously check this one out!
     
    Spirit in the Night: This song just sounds like a warm muggy summer night. Is that an orchestra? Indeed. Come on, guitar and violin showdown, come on. It's a love song, but with edge. Short but pretty good, deserving of a single.
     
    This Side of Paradise: Wind chimes? I hate wind chimes. Kind of disco-y. It's about that time in music history, it's possible. Scratch that, it's synth rock/pop. Damn, I was kind of hoping it was disco. I really just can't get into this one. It's not that it's bad, it's just mediocre. It's better than the dolphin song but I wouldn't want it on my phone. Pass.
     
    Starbird: Another choir start. Jazzy drums and bass, alright. Screeching lead guitar, me likey. This thing is full blown electric jazz. I'm liking this one. Hey! There's words now. They're singing about a phoenix, but calling it a starbird. And it just ends quickly. It began good, but fall flat at the end.
     
    Questions: Sad and longing vocals, mmkay... They answered my questions with question? What kind of shit is that? If someone did that to me I'd kick them in the head. This is getting kind of schmaltzy. All brooding and sad sounding. This song is as dense and meaningless as the stupid ass cover. At least it was short.
     
    Well, I've heard worse. The two singles are worth a listen and there are a couple hidden gems in there too. There's also a couple stinkers too. But that's to be expected on an LP. Prices, right... ... Uh... This stupid ass book doesn't list it! What a load! Well it gives $12 for a near mint copy of another album on the Warner Bros. label like this is. So let's go with that. Should you buy it? 3 questions:
     
    Am I a fan of Manfred Mann?
    Am I a fan of classic rock?
    Is it cheap?
     
    Yes to number 1? It's a must have. Yes to number 2? Combine that yes with another before you buy. Yes to number 3? Get it if it's really cheap, otherwise combine that yes with another before you buy. It's a solid album with 2 hit singles, but the other songs just don't hold up as well. I found mine in the bargain bin and it's worth the buck I paid. OK, I'm out.
  13. Avatar tag: shipping
    Everybody is born with the six senses: Sight, hearing, smell, taste, touch, and most importantly, common. As time has passed, I've noticed that the last one has been seriously lacking as of late. Maybe it has something with those talk boxes. I'm sure you all have seen it. It usually involves mixing them with... Well anything. Drinking, walking, and driving come to mind first but it can be anything. There was numb nuts that tried to talk on her phone and cook spaghetti. Long story short, she ended up in the back of my rig. But stupid is as stupid does, and morons aren't limited to their interactions with their phones. Case and point: Saturday.
     
    My Saturday began like most. I woke up at 6A.M. I shit, showered, and shaved. I had some leftovers for breakfast and watched some TV. I wish it was ponies but no. It's not yet and even if they were, I'm still in the stable and I plan on keeping it that way. At least for the time being. I got suited up and at 7 I headed to the station. I usually get there early so if I drew the short straw and have to do extra chores, I can get them done before my shift begins. I lucked out, so just watched TV until 8. I checked out the rig and made sure we had everything we needed. I didn't even make it through check out before one of our neighboring districts that uses our radio channels got a call for a crashed semi. One thing I've picked up during my time here: if the little towns are busy, we're boned.
     
    Sure as shit I got one right before lunch. It was a normal bullshit call. A lady said she had trouble breathing and her feet began to swell up. For you and me, that's bad. Very bad. But for an old lady with CHF, that's normal. She took her breathing treatment before we even showed up. If she would have used just a tiny bit of her common sense, she would've realized that those are normal symptoms of her previously diagnosed dual sided CHF. But when you're on Medicare and the taxpayers get the privilege of paying for the $1000 ambulance ride, why bother using your common sense. Don't worry, this isn't the point of my rambling. That's another argument for another day.
     
    When your job security comes from people doing stupid shit, you can't get too worked up over stuff like that. No matter if you work in the big city or out in the sticks, 90% of police/fire/ems calls are bullshit. Yes, I consider traffic tickets bullshit calls. Not that they're not important, just not badass life threatening calls. But what I do get worked up about is when a little bit of common sense could have saved someone from serious injury or death.
     
    We had just got done with training on Safe Haven laws that afternoon when we got toned out. As soon as I heard the tones, I knew it was going to be something good. Why? Because a severe thunderstorm with microbursts had just began to move into my county. The timing was just too good to be a coincidence. What I got worked me up pretty good. A town in my district was having an antique tractor show at the fairgrounds. These storms didn't just pop out of nowhere, they had been predicted all week. But they didn't listen. They held the show as planned, and the storms arrived... as planned. Once the 70+ straight line winds, pouring rain, and lightning showed up they finally decided to cancel it. But it was too late. The winds had knocked down a big ass oak tree... and it landed on five people. Both rigs booked it towards the scene, but driving a box on wheels in what amounts to a weak hurricane isn't so easy. When we finally arrived, fire had got the tree off of everyone and brought them inside. Luckily only one was seriously injured with a broken hip. The others were refusals. Common damn sense would have saved that person from serious injury. But that wasn't it, oh no, go big or go home right?
     
    Later that evening I got another one. An unresponsive woman in the corner of my district. When we show up, we find and old lady laying on the couch having trouble breathing. The family said she was fine until about 9P.M. when she stopped responding. Sounds bad right? Especially when it was now 9:30! It took them a half hour to call 911. I'm giving you 30 secs to wake back up and then I'm calling. We scooped her up and laid her on the stretcher, exposing brownish urine on her blanket. She was in bad shape, and for longer than 30 minutes. When we hooked her up to the monitor, we found the cause. A-fib. Needless to say, we rode hot to the hospital. When we transferred her, the doc knew right away that she it didn't look good. As soon as I left the room, they called for a chaplain. Would common sense have saved her life? Who knows. But the lack of it might have killed her.
     
    We all make mistakes in life. I've made enough to fill a book. But there's a difference between an honest mistake and being a dipshit. When that little voice in the back of your head tells you to think twice about what you're about to do, you should probably listen. You might just save your ass.
  14. Avatar tag: shipping
    Well, it's time again. I'm gonna try something different this time. I'm gonna write as I listen to the songs, so my thoughts will be in real time. Last time I listened to the album while I was writing the intro. I had to remeber my thoughts and I don't like the way it turned out. This should be more fun. Let's see what's up next. Let It Flow by Elvin Bishop... I don't think I have ever played this one before. I remember getting it, it was at the going out of business sale at the local record store. By the time I got a chance to get by there it was pretty much picked clean of the good stuff. I was scouring through the piles of crap when this caught my eye. The artist seemed familiar, I believe he used to be in the Paul Butterfield Blues Band. It was 25 cents so what the hell. Let's see what the interbutts has to say about this one.
     
    OK, not much to work with here. It was released in May 1974 and it has an ass load of guest musicians. That's about it. Let's move on to the cover I guess.
     
    The front cover is pretty simple. Just a photo of him sitting on a dock at a pond. Basic title in white and black letters. The back cover is even simpler. A photo of 4 guys with the same trash 'stache and 3 of the 4 have Kentucky waterfalls. I'm sure one of them is Elvin Bishop, not sure which one. Scratch that, they all have Kentucky waterfalls. The photo is cropped pretty tight so they can fit a ton of small black print on the right part of the cover. Is it a wall hanger? Nope. Song time! This is first time playing it so here goes nothing.
     
    Side one starts with 'Sunshine Special'. Hey wait a minute, it says this song was written by Applejack! Dafuq? What a hell of a way to start off an album. Mmkay, it's a song about a train. Very similar to Midnight Special, another train song. It's got lots of honky tonk piano and steel guitar, a good combo. It's countryish and bluesy, I like it.
     
    'Ground Hog': Kind of sounds like Jeff Beck. Jazzy and groovy with a dash of blues. Some clavinet and slide guitar, works really well. More honky tonk piano. The breakdown kind of sounds like Yakety Sax. I like this better than the first.
     
    'Honey Babe': Now there's acoustic guitar, yep it's a country song. I didn't expect a bluesman to play this. I'm not much of a county fan, but I'll give it a chance. It's not like I can press next. Meh, didn't care for it.
     
    'Stealin' Watermelons': Strange title, who the hell steals watermelons? How can you hide them? Good lord, it's like a blues song mixed with a cheesy porn soundtrack. Cheesy porn with a slide guitar playing over it. What more could I expect from a bunch of guys in the 70's with porn staches? Pass.
     
    'Travelin' Shoes': Starts off like a soul song. It sounds very familiar. Like a mix of a bunch of popular songs at the time, not very creative. The guitar solo is alright. It's probably the most original part of this song. Now there's a piano solo. And a horn solo. Now back to piano. Solos! Solos everywhere! I think the songs about a guy realizing he's a strong independent black woman that doesn't have to take shit from no woman and leaves her ass. A little long but it's an OK song. Well that does it for side one.
     
    'Let it Flow': OK, the title track. This should be promising. What the shit? It sounds like they're testifying in church! It has a backing church choir and everything. My man! You were in one of the best blues bands in history, what are you doing?! This was disappointing.
     
    'Hey Good Lookin': Hey. It sounds like an old jazz song. Oh, the back cover says this one was written by Hank Williams. That explains why it sounds old, even for this record. It fits his style more than the last song but it just sounds old and outdated. Movin' on.
     
    'Fishin': A song about fishing. How original. I sure love fishing though, maybe it won't be so bad. Ah damn it, it's another country song. Sigh. This album has gone downhill fast. It's telling me how to fish, thanks. I totally forgot how. Oh now you're telling me how to cook and eat catfish. Prick.
     
    'Can't Go Back': Asssss! Country!!!! I'm seriously, you are a blues musician! You lied to me! Bring back the first 2 songs, they were actually good. I should have realized when Elvin, Mud Dobber, Skeeter, and Jim Bob were on the back cover. Ugh.
     
    'I Can't Hold Myself in Line': Country... Again... I'm about to bang my head against the wall. It says this was written by Merle Haggard. I swear to Luna, if the next one is a country song...
     
    'Bourbon Street': That's it. I give up.
     
    So that was a disaster. I figured that a member of one of my favorite blues rock bands would play blues rock. I was sorely mistaken. Let's see what the book says it's worth... $12 in near mint condition. Screw that. The only reason I gave it a shot was because it was a quarter. And that's pushing it. OK, should you buy it? Let's see... Unless you're a record collector who wants to own every album out there, just keep on walking. The first 2 songs were alright, but it went full country after that. Country fans need not apply either, the only decent ones were the covers. No singles, no hits, pass on this one guys.
     
    I like it this way better, it was a hell of a lot more fun to do it this way too. See ya later.
  15. Avatar tag: shipping
    Before I begin, I would like to welcome you to my vinyl record review. I have a vinyl record collection that equals roughly a metric ass tonne. Many of these I haven't listened to in a while so now is the perfect time to blow the dust off and give them a play. I've been wanting to do this for a while, why not now? Be forewarned, this is a vinyl record collection. Not a CD collection. That means the albums I will be reviewing will be mostly 50's through 80's rock, pop, blues, and whatever else caught my eye/ear. I will be pulling records from the shelves in no particular order. Whatever I grab is what I'll do.
     
    Now then, on to the very first review: Three Dog Night by Three Dog Night
     
    This one was released in October of 1968. The original release was a moderate success, enough to get them a second album. But the first two singles were meh, and not much attention was paid to it. When they released 'One' as a single, things really took off.
     
    The copy I own is a second pressing, which means it has "One" printed on the cover to pimp their hit song. The first pressings didn't have that. The front cover is pretty standard for the late '60s. A picture of the the group on stage with a red filter and motion blur. The text colors are pink and yellow. The same goes for the back cover. Overall the cover is pretty basic, nothing I would hang on the wall.
     
    This record had a total of 11 songs, 6 on the A side and 5 on the B side. The songs are a mix of pop, rock, and a dash of funk. The album starts of the single 'One'. I'm sure most of you have heard this song, it's pretty popular. This song was the reason I bought the album, so obviously I like the song. Just classic 60's pop. It's followed by 'Nobody', a rocker. A little faster paced and harder edged sound, right up my alley. 'Heaven is in Your Mind' is a little slower but a little funky so it was able to keep my interest. 'It's For You' however didn't keep my interest. It starts off with an odd vocal part, almost choir or opera like. It doesn't sit well with me. It does pick up and get a groove going eventually but as soon as it does, the song ends. Very strange. 'Let Me Go' is another filler song. It's not too bad, just unremarkable. 'Chest Fever' rounds out the A side. It's more along the lines of the first two songs, pop but with an edge. I like it. 'Find Someone to Love' starts the B side off. Pretty standard for the late 60's. Singing about looking for wiminz. It's not a single, but it's a solid funky rock song. 'No One Ever Hurt So Bad' is the funkiest song on the album. And it's not that great. The main issue is that it doesn't hold it's groove. No matter how loose the lead parts get, the rhythm section needs to stay together. That doesn't happen here. 'Don't Make Promises' is another slower song that isn't remarkable. More filler. 'The Loner' is pretty good, it's a rock song. A pretty basic rock song, but a good one. 'Try a Little Tenderness' wraps the record up. It starts off slow and works up to a rocking finish. It's OK, the beginning is a little too loose but they bring it back together for a solid finish.
     
    Goldmine puts a value of $12 on a record in near mint condition. So a normal copy should run you a couple bucks if that. I found mine for 50 cents in the bargain bin. Should you buy it? A must have for Three Dog Night fans, classic rock fans should pick it up if it's cheap, but 'One' is the only song worth a damn on the album so most people have no reason to buy the full album.
     
    Well that was fun. I hope you enjoyed it, I certainly did. See y'all next time.
  16. Avatar tag: shipping
    The title pretty much says it all. My ADHD riddled brain has thoughts from time to time and I guess this is a great place to put it all down. I'm gonna put down all sorts of stuff: mostly opinions on this and that, some venting, and maybe some fun calls I had. Let's see where this goes.
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