Forum Member Crush: N/A
Pony Crush: I suppose Rarity will always have a special place in my heart
IRL Crush: A friend of mine, who I shall codename Adelaide. Now, I'm only 15, so I don't think I even know what love truly is, nor will I any time soon. However, I realized recently that the closest I've come to being "in love" with someone in my whole, albeit short, life is with Adelaide. She's just one of those people you don't see any flaws in, no matter how hard you think. Obviously she has them, considering she's human and all humans have flaws, but to me she's perfect. I was going to ask her to the school dance when I found out she was already in a relationship. Not only that, but this person was another girl. It turns out she identifies as pansexual and has been going out with a girl I used to have a thing for (I guess I have a type, lol). This revelation crushed me, and it dawned on me then how strong my feelings for her were. I ended up asking her to the dance anyway, since her girlfriend goes to another school now and I had already planned to do so prior to finding out she was already in a relationship. She said yes (Thank the gods), but I still feel really down. I'm sure I'll still have a good time with her at the dance as friends, but my initial hope was for us to go as more than friends, or at least leave that way.
Either way, I've decided that at some point, most likely the dance itself, I'm going to tell her how I feel about her. It's just something that I'm going to need to get off my chest and make her aware of. And don't worry, I'm going to make it very clear that I understand she's already in a relationship and I'm not trying to get in the way of that in any sense. As I said, I had a thing for her girlfriend a year or two back, so I wouldn't want to do something like that in the first place. A part of me hopes that things go well with them, as I really want Adelaide to be happy and I know her girlfriend is a nice gal. Another part of me knows they're going to do well, since they're both incredible people and I literally just can't picture any sort of conflict arising between the two of them. A final part of me, one I'm not very proud of, hopes things don't go well with them, and that I can have Adelaide for myself...
So.... Yea. Just needed to vent about this somewhere. If you took the time to read this whole thing, I suppose I should thank you for sitting through my dumb teenage relationship problem XP