Cimarronboy

How much are/would you be willing to read? I ask as I have a couple tasks I could use help with; 

I have 4 fics I would like looked over, a main, a sequel, a side, and a journal version of the main. 

I also would like someone (if not multiple people) read both first chapters of my main and it's journal counterpart, and tell me which is the more preferable format. 

I'm flexible and willing to work on as much or as little as you want to/can handle, whether it's just one fic or both tasks. I can also link you to the story(ies) you choose and give you the password, or send them over in another format if it's easier for you. 

I don't have the first Horizon but I do have the 3rd and Motorsport 5, would anyone know of any designers known for their pony skins or be able to help me find skins for current and future cars on either game?

I'm looking for the above to replace/sub for my usual free mlp comic provider since they've gotten a bit behind in posting vids of the comics. That's not to say they aren't reliable, it's more impatience and excitement on my part. I'm hoping to catch up on the guardians of harmony annual and the deviations series. I'd buy them but with the lack of funds, and no actual comic book sources within 20 miles, it's kinda hard to keep up with physical copies. Anywho does anyone/pony know of a legit online source for reading comics for free? Kisscartoon's comic site doesn't have them and my usual, Chronoshenron and his youtube comic vids, is again behind, otherwise I'd have used them.

Either morphing or generating items in my mind into reality. I'd definitely use either ability to disappear and maybe start playing hero after a while (though also use them for devious/evil purposes at first through repay for some stolen things later).

Top three worst for me are smb, for obvious reasons, the fall of reach (below) and doom. They only thing that made it doom was the fps scenes. They're decent movies for being just films but video game adaptations they are trash. 

On the flip side the halo films, while two being more of a series, another being barely more than a cgi half book, and the last being more of a character intro, were somewhat good. Out of the four/five (legends, fall of reach, foreward unto dawn, and nightfall) I'd have to say foreward is the best. Love how accurate they were with the covies, even though the aliens were all cgi. Nightfall was a web series turned film that intro'd spartan lock and had mainly hunter worms. Legends was just a series of short stories in various animation styles. Reach was a total crap shot. They skipped a lot of events in the story, and it was all cgi.  Reach could've been done with the full story and as a live action like foreward was. 

Alright I think I made word count, the story page says 800 something words that doesn't change while the chapter has a number over 1000 next to it that does so I'm kinda confused on whether or not I made word count, anywho I've begun chapter 2 and hit a snag. I'm trying to describe a valley surrounded by mountains. By valley I mean a specific HOMELAND for a herd and their leader and his mate. I know the place by heart but it's beauty kinda makes speechless a bit more literal in my case. 

I read your first chapter and I think it has potential but there are a number of things that could be worked on. I understand that you were writing this in the middle of the night so its a given that there will be flaws. I feel like your thoughts are scrambled everywhere, making it hard for me to follow what is currently happening with your characters. You could be more descriptive of the actions, thoughts, sights, and settings involving your main character. I think if more detail was put into the chapter and some editing, it would liven up the chapter a whole lot. Your plot looks stable you just need a little help developing/detailing the plot to make it work together.

 

If I were to tell you what the story was about I would it is about a boy who watched/heard his father fall into the path of darkness. He is desperately trying not to end up like his father.

 

I hoped this helped. Let me know if you want me to elaborate on anything I said above or if you have any questions.

It's a bit late at night for me, but here's what I got.

 

I thought it was rather nice what you had going!  I really liked the depth of the relationship that the main character had with their dad, however I feel that you put that information in the wrong place.  As I read through the chapter, I found myself asking, "What does this have to do with the scene?"  I would space this information out over the course of the story, inserting it where it's relevant and otherwise using it to develop your character.  Otherwise, you're creating an exposition dump that makes the reader frustrated as they slog through a thick bush of fluff that leads to nowhere.

 

There's also the issue of Gem Hero's father being an alicorn.  This especially needs to be expanded upon as it brings up a lot of questions, such as, "Is Gem Hero an alicorn, too?  Is his mother an alicorn?  Are they royalty?  Do the canon alicorns know of them?"

Thank you-you two I really Appreciate this. I think I can answer your confusion; The flashbacks/thoughts about the past are just thoughts that occur as the character is running. Although that does give me an idea for the word count deficit. As for the species I do have to be more specific, especially since the only identifier I'd used was a horn, otherwise relationships and such were going to be revealed in later chapters (possibly the second chapter), if it got that far.

@Alicorn: Your summary has some truth, he did see his dad fall to darkness, but it's supposed to be more of a next gen/kid led by fate/destiny follows parents heroic hoofsteps story. 

@Hazard Time: Gem would be the female protagonists name, Rock is the correct one. Think of it as a double meaning; rock being both music genre and gem/geologically related at the same time. It's cool though, we've all been victim to the effects of being awake when we shouldn't. 

December 31st 2015 my willies predicted a bad year.... they have yet to be proven wrong. December 31st 2016 will be the end of a step from icy cold waters (or slowly increasing currents, depending on one's proverb preferences) onto the very water lapped edge of a cold and condemning iceberg of doom (or into a destructive and consuming whirlpool straight to tartarus). Either way I can only hope 2017 proves to be the year I'm finally wrong about something and otherwise prepare to be eaten alive. 

All part of how I became a brony. Wanted to burn every piece of merch I encountered becuase it was so "un-horse like" and didn't look anything like a real horse. Got tired of being proverbially boxed in so I decided to research and use said research to be a jerk. 3 jabs to the heart later from episode 1 and all resistence had become futile. 

Randomly thought up the premise for a new story and typed up the first chapter/prologue and I'm looking someone to go over it and tell me whether or not it's something I should keep going with, worthwhile wise. It's about a colt who discovers the subject of his fathers research and uses it to follow in his dads' heroic footsteps. It's supposed to be a more toned down (and less male mary sue) character doing somewhat the same feats as my previous character but in a better, more acceptable form (again being less male mary sue). It is in the same headcannon 'verse as my previous story but later in time. Anecdotally it somehow came to me during a sleepless night and managed to bust through my creativity block enough to keep me conscious til it was done being typed. Again though just looking for opinions on the PURSUIT of the story not whether it stinks or not, and I am willing to hear some ideas on some changes or maybe additions to the story. 

http://www.fimfiction.net/story/356178/rock-hero

I don't know about posting anything to the fimfic group since most of my older stuff is dead (lost the will to write shortly after the gauntlet of fire) and about a male mary sue (which only exists because of crap from my past causing mental issues (hence why he's so op'd and willing to martyr at the slightest chance)) and the new one(see below) is barely started.

I've started a new fic about a new character (4:30 am random writers block breaking inspired) I hope to keep in line (one ability with many uses and variations, rather than many powers and abilities), and I'm looking to getting it proofed if that's still a thing in this thread. 

The colors are off by more than just the white; compare the Geodes to the EOH here; the EOH are Pink, blue, purple, orange, red, purple, while the Geodes are Yellow, blue, white, purple, orange, pink, Red.

The EOH have 2 purples while the geodes only have one, and the Geodes have yellow and white which the EOH lack, as the EOH were designed to compliment the M6's color scheme while the Geodes are explicitly their color schemes.

 

 

That really doesn't change anything, just pointing out the color difference

So I see. still images 1, paused videos zip, lol. Either way it's all up to hasbro from here. Here's hopin.

I think the gems were just supposed to be the crytalized form of either the leftover magic from FG (from Twilight/sunset after they absorbed the others magic), or be magic sent through by the Tree of harmony.

 

I think the "cast off magic" theory makes more sense honestly, since they have a tendency to try and tie events in a film back to the magical occurence in the previous film (In RR the dazzlings see the magic of the mane six at the start, and twilight starts investigating in FG due to the magical occurences happening in the previous films).

The cast off idea sounds plausible though it brings up the question of travel from Canterlot high and landing in the camp Everfree  rock quarry and taking shard form.though the crack in the statue (which ties fg to loe) may be related.

The other theory only popped up due to the behavior of the shards. They somewhat (being only shards rather than the whole gems) replayed what happened in episode 2, going from one form to a cm shaped stone after aligning themselves with their respective bearer. The only difference between the sets (other than being single shards versus sharded stones) is the addition of the white gem which then switches up the order of the colors, giving rare a gem matching her coat and allowing the red gem to be transferred to shimmer from dash. 

I have only one question that the movie brought up. Those trinkets. Were they, shards of the original gems? if so then that confirms a missing stone. Is there going to be an episode in the cartoon filling in the intel related to that mythical m.i.a. rock or how are they gonna tie that in/cover that mistake? Most importantly; carrier and title? 

As for the film itself; had some good parts. Loved all the little jokes. Couldn't really find a tune in this one like I did the other three, though the music might need to grow on me a bit. The sun/light ship idea, was kinda predictable. Decent film for the eqg series. Worst moment for me was a look inside of the giddy ones' mind.... I'll be having nightmares of that for awhile, lol. 

Dear faust they've already plucked up the timeline using the lion guard, which despite that major flaw is still decent as is, why they gotta ruin the rest of the magic? It's got more than enough sequels and spin-offs, leave it alone. Slag it I'm just gonna advise everyone to stock up on whatever mob accessories are preferred and keep a strong eye out If a cherished film is ruined round up all the other fans and give 'em an ole fashioned protest. We'll get a practice run with DreamWorks if their project set to release next year over Netflix involving a certain movie that really deserved a sequel long ago bombs severely....

There's so many lines on this one. With all the double edged swords it's not surprising if there ends up being a slight debate over the idea. Still though this move is one that's better going with the tried and true move and just do nothing or another sequel/spinoff that would fix the timeline issue between the guard and Simba's pride. The latter suggestion being the most brilliant as tia knows every fan hating that rift would be elated with intel explaining kions absence during the pride/outlander war. Slag, throw that other cub in as well, that'd really send the fandom into a celebratory tizzy. 

Either naruto, similar personality and "temper" control issues, or the gun nerd from high school of the dead, though not as knowledgeable about guns but drool just the same over them. 

Anything Rarity related that I yet have, the current trilogy dvd collection, any/all mlp fim books including the wonderbolts guide, the full daring do series (including that special edition chest set with the three books in it),  and the eqg series books, and all other general mlp merch I don't have barring anything chrysalis and trixie related items for reasons. 

Every once in a while when available or offered. Other wise I don't drink much. Six pack in the fridge? I'll have a bottle or two throughout the day, just for something different, like going from coffee to milk to water/tea/kool aid/soda/etc over the course of a day. If I'm out and someone I'm with offers to by a drink and they're drinking, or tells me to pour a glass from their pitcher, or tosses a bottle/can/location of at me I may partake. 

You know how twi changes from pony to hoomin (being funny there) in the tunnel between the mirrors and the statue? Logically same principal for the brain. Not only does her body physically adapt to the destination environment but so does the mind. Although the loophole to that is spike because he went canid and yet (in the first two and presumably the third and any future titles where the natural born equestian pair appear together) he was still able to speak english (or w/e human language was used where the film was shown) and was understood by everyone on that plane, not limited to just pony twi. Why spike is the exception/ main theory would be magic but on the other hand logically he should either have been barking and not understood or just understood by pony twi cuz scienc and place of origin. 

Also chrono/space subjects= too much theory, too little fact, too much possibility to know for sure. 

Luxurious, soft, well cared for, perfect, adaptable, comfy..... 

Gotta support my waifu here; Rare was the third and final nail in my transition to becoming a brony. Those big eyes, that D.I.D. attitude, what better a character for a wannabe hero, Some of her antics are hilarious even if they're sterotypical girly girl noble snob behaviour.  I love everything about Rare. 

Dash also gets some love. Her tomboyish competitive exterior brings out a touch of rivalry to the plate. She knows how to have tons of fun at a quick pace but will always be there for friends and competitors alike if the need to arises. She's somepony you could game with and still have a good time (despite some depicted antics). She'd make a great coach for anyone looking to get in shape using her competitiveness as a motivator. Her ego is always worth a good laugh with some of the situations it gets her in. She may gloat a lot but that's more self confidence than anything as she knows she'll do her best to back her words and that there are skills she has. 

How's about being psychic? Willies that predict the future. I'll start twitching like I'm having chills or something and immediately I know. Sadly the "prediction" part is limited on intel. I only get "something bad is going to happen" and that's all I know. Sadly it's right on. Between that, my near impossible prediction accuracy (literally right 95% or more of the time), or my big heart, I don't know which curse is the worst. 

Twilight, Thomas, Brian Griffon and friends' escapades or something like that. I randomly found out about this fan work while trying to locate a tumblr page on a wii u. I wanted to try out the series and see what it was about and if I liked it but I can't find any links to anything anywhere. Can Someone help point me in the right direction?

Aspherger's (not sure if I'm spelling that right) syndrome. I'm practically bruce banner; A genius yet no control over my anger. 

Hope quoting myself is ok but I have to rescind my post with updated info;

That diagnosis was done 10-15 years ago. I've been talking to a psychologist since February and he said that my diagnosis is more PTSD, Long range/lasting depression and anxiety than autism. I''m gonna change my answer to possibly since there's arguments on both sides of the idea, mainly old info things may have changed and the fact the older therapist worked in a health center while the more recent guy works in a random office/apartment building split for businesses and a partial college campus. 

Our district called it heads down thumbs up, of course us lazy kids loved any excuse to not have to do any school work