Self Improvement Tea

[Ice Princess Silky <3 13,916]

Hello my darling little ponies. 

It's Silky! 

Lately some friends have been telling me about how they've been struggling with some personal things. I wonder, is there anything that any of you do that helps to improve your mood whenever you're feeling down or stuck or hopeless?

Disclaimer: Only a mental health professional can offer you specific diagnosis or official advice tailored to your needs. So please keep in mind, I am merely posting things here that tend to help me. If it helps you, too, great! This is merely friendly advice to help along in our journey to being better. This is why I also encourage others to post here some small advice on what helps them, too!

Here are some ideas of what I do whenever I am feeling such a way:

         

1. Keep a journal. 

Did you know that your life is a story? It is! Since the day that you were born, you carry a story that absolutely nobody else can take away from you. It is absolutely yours and only you can tell it. So why not write things down that you feel might be able to anchor you or keep you grounded and focused on who you are, where you've come from and where would you like to be? Baby steps take you a long way so long as you are consistent and you'd be surprising yourself with how far that goes.

Some tips on keeping a journal:

Just keep writing. Maybe keep a principle of writing ONE whole page a day. In two weeks, you'll look back and be amazed at what you've left there!

What if I don't have anything to write? I just stare at the blank page and write nothing? 

That's ok! Just keep writing over and over again "I have nothing to write, I have nothing to write, I have nothing to write. I have nothing to write." Repeatedly... until other feelings begin to start bubbling in, like "I feel so lonely, why do I feel so unmotivated? I plan to do laundry in a few moments," etc etc. So long as you’re writing something daily, I find keeping track of your days can prove super helpful and it can be like a muscle to get yourself used to having some private time to write when you're only just starting out. Just understand, each of your days are unique. You are unique. You will always be. So keeping track of these things are important, lest you forget and drift away in emotions without having a grip on what exactly those emotions are. 
         
            

2. Listen to music. 

Sure, listening to music that helps you VENT and let out your frustrations can definitely help. But for me, there's a fine line between venting to let it all out and venting to the point where you begin to spiral due to immersing yourself way too well into those sensations. Because of this, while music can be used to release negativity... why not counter balance the negative with something positive and inspiring? Something that can spark your interest to paint, draw, read, anything that makes you come to life with creative energy rather than destructive ones?

              

3. Learn a new hobby! 
           
Hobbies are fun because they're all about you! Have a lot of energy? Look for dance classes, fencing, acting, social groups, biking, gym workouts! Slower energy? Find something peaceful and soothing like doing art, organising, podcast creation, blogging, writing, whatever it is that calls to you can be your new hobby! Find ways to learn more about yourself while exploring who you are as a person and discovering what you can show the world makes you... well.. you! 

I think the key is to not allow yourself to fall into an uninspiring pattern or rut. Even the word "depression" means "hole," because this is often what we feel we are stuck in whenever we get this way. Again, depression should be handled seriously with a health care professional, but for those seeking babysteps for self improvement, these are merely some ideas to share. Best wishes on your self improvement journey and enjoy the tea with me. /) 

[Ice Princess Silky <3 13,916]

"On a scale of 1 - 15."

Another idea is:

Try to find something that helps you to feel just a little bit better. On a scale of 1 - 15... how do you feel? With 1 being the lowest in sadness and 15 being the highest in confidence and empowerment. If you feel yourself in the ranges of 1-5.. what is a small thing you could do to make it from 5 to 6 (?) for example. 
 

Quote

Spike: Did somebody say scales?! *shows off one of his shiny bright dragon scales on his arm*  
AppleJack: Not one of THOSE kinds of scales, Spike! 

 

[Felis Amafeles 905]

Acceptance

Bad moods are part of whom you are, so you can't completely reverse bad moods. Fighting your moods is fighting yourself, but not all the time you have to fight yourself.

The reason for bad moods can be neural connections in the brain caused by past trauma.
It could also be aggression that has been repressed into the subconscious.
So sometimes try not letting the brain take control.

Maybe try lying down and staying with your moods.
Try sensing your limbs, sensing your torso, sensing the palms of your hands and the soles of your feet.
Try putting the brain aside. 

Observe

When struggling with bad moods, perhaps try observing yourself with a sense of humour.
Without criticising or blaming yourself, just observe.
Try separate ‘I’ from ‘my reaction’.

When you become the observer, You are free.
You will realise that ‘how I think things should be’ and ‘what I think’ ≠ Me,
Your perception is not yourself...

At this point, you will know through observation why moods arise and what the real situation is like outside of your own perceptions.
The more you know about yourself and your own perceptions, the less likely you are to be controlled by your moods.
You'll be wiser and calmer. 

[Ice Princess Silky <3 13,916]

3 hours ago, Felis Amafeles said:

Acceptance

Bad moods are part of whom you are, so you can't completely reverse bad moods. Fighting your moods is fighting yourself, but not all the time you have to fight yourself.

The reason for bad moods can be neural connections in the brain caused by past trauma.
It could also be aggression that has been repressed into the subconscious.
So sometimes try not letting the brain take control.

Maybe try lying down and staying with your moods.
Try sensing your limbs, sensing your torso, sensing the palms of your hands and the soles of your feet.
Try putting the brain aside. 

Observe

When struggling with bad moods, perhaps try observing yourself with a sense of humour.
Without criticising or blaming yourself, just observe.
Try separate ‘I’ from ‘my reaction’.

When you become the observer, You are free.
You will realise that ‘how I think things should be’ and ‘what I think’ ≠ Me,
Your perception is not yourself...

At this point, you will know through observation why moods arise and what the real situation is like outside of your own perceptions.
The more you know about yourself and your own perceptions, the less likely you are to be controlled by your moods.
You'll be wiser and calmer. 

This one was so good, Felis. Thank you for this. 

[Felis Amafeles 905]

27 minutes ago, Ice Princess Silky said:

This one was so good, Felis. Thank you for this.

Thank you Silky! 
Thanks for creating this topic 

[Astralshy 26,705]

My methods to cope with such situations are

1. Listen to music

Any music my heart desire and fits my mood

2. drinking tea

should come of no surprise. always helps

3. walking

preferably in nature but also in cities it can help a lot

4. do work

distraction, works also with work

[Bizarre Wizard 5,010]

Oh! My! GOSH!!! How did I miss this topic?  I definitely have something to share. 

On 2024-08-15 at 4:05 AM, Ice Princess Silky said:

Keep a journal

Journal is great tool.

I would add that you should reread it and reflect from time to time to learn something from yourself.

I prefer file in Google Docs so I be able to insert links and pics into it, and it's available from all my devices. If you use some file, It's convenient to date it backwards so new records always were at the top. I combine it with To Do list. Very powerful planning tool.

Some creative people can combine it with scrapbooking. You can draw right there, glue some photos and memorable pieces of paper like transport tickets from awesome trip.

Remember, it isn't a draft and shall stay your friend and adviser for many years so be careful to store it securely to not lose it nor expose to accidental people. It's only for your eyes, so you could feel securely to write there.

On 2024-08-15 at 12:44 PM, Felis Amafeles said:

Try putting the brain aside.

I do the same, but call it meditation =] Really useful practice. Brain does a lot of job during the day and big part of it is going at background. Too many extra unwished mental processes drain daily dose of resources like willpower or attention extremely quickly. Meditation is like a reset button on the brain. It can't restore energy like proper sleep, but can stop noisy thoughts and emotions to save some power until the end of the day.

It's crucial for ones with very active nervous system like me (and some other ponies on this forum, who wakes up at 5am and have to grind till sunset LOL)

Edited September 6, 2024 by Captain Salty Scribbles

[ComanderZhabikKlavik 3,084]

Sometimes I have to deal with some personal problems. One of the problems is that I sometimes don't understand what is normal and what is not normal. Keeping a diary and listening to music are good ways to deal with problems. I always use these methods. I have some more ways to deal with a bad mood and problems that I always use: Cold shower (or ice bath), workout (for example, I do street workout, kettlebell lifting, sometimes I break steel nails with my hands, for me this is one of the best ways to deal with stress). Sometimes I go to the village and spend time in nature. There is almost no stress here, unlike in the city. 

I forgot to add the Wim Hof breathing method and meditation.