As an American I like my tobacco... a lot.
Smoking is awesome, but so is chewing. Goddamn is chewing awesome.
I love the taste of menthol cigarettes, but there is some GODDAMN awesome chew out there.
And to anyone who says "OH MY GOD WHY DO YOU DO THAT YOU'RE SUCH A BAD PERSON YOU'RE CAUSING THE WORLD TO END AND CORRUPTING THE CHILDREN," shut up.
We aren't here to discuss not using tobacco. We like our tobacco and we aren't afraid to admit it.
Not only is it prettier it also doesn't get viruses.
Don't forget that every money-grubbing corporation uses Windows since it's GREAT at scamming people and that's why Dell and all those other name brands advocate it.
Apple also uses cloud technology to allow me to stream whatever music I want instead of downloading it, which is super convenient.
I bet Microsoft users don't even listen to good bands like Neutral Milk Hotel or The Postal Service.
If you guys could stream you'd probably
So there you are, thinking you're incredibly smart because you think you understand philosophy. You know, the pseudointellectual "science" that creates psudeoquestions which can't be answered?
Yeah, that one. It makes you smart right? Feeling like you're contributing to society by not contributing anything at all?
You're really smart, buddy boy.
You see, the only way to live life to the fullest and take the most out of it is to overcome your obstacles. Then you can utilize those lessons
Everyone has low self esteem.
What the fuck happened to the entire goddamn human race? We used to be awesome and would kick ass all the time all day long.
Now we listen to Linkin Park and act like we're in junior high.
Jesus mother of fuck.
There are nails on a chalkboard.
There are the screams of the eternally damned.
There are the sounds of shreaking silence.
Then there are the voices of creatures that defy explanation: British Women.
My god, your voices make me want to castrate myself. Each time you say something it literally gives me a cue to cover my ears until the torture is over.
There is nothing I like about your voice. Shut up. Please.
Oh my god.
All they need to do is take important figures who match the traits of Mane Six.
For Instance:
Fluttershy - Barack Obama
He's introverted, cares about the environment and other people and wants to end street violence. Mr. President is an all-around '60s hippie who just can't show too much of an egotistical side.
Rainbow Dash - Ben Roethlisberger
He's no body's bitch, not even in the NFL. Ben has no tolerance to rules, is cocky as hell and loves to show off. Granted, he's a
We have Doom Kitty, right? So Doom Kitty is a pure black cat wearing nothing else than a collar. You see where I'm going with this, don't you?
Doom Kitty has "Doom" in the name. Thus, Doom Kitty must be related to Doom Guy.
Where is Doom Kitty's helmet? Where is Doom Kitty's body armor?
There are obviously demons around so that's taken care of, but that doesn't make up for everything else.
At least we understand the chronological order of Doom, now.
Doom -> Doom 2 -> Ultimate
I really appreciate that you're such a GREAT person. You come over to this country, complain that you're single, get with my friend, and encourage him to get you pregnant.
OF GODDAMN COURSE HE WOULD, BECAUSE HE'S AN IDIOT.
Now you want to move back to England in order have the child.
Great. You want to take one of my friends and leave me dry. Now what am I supposed to do?
Just for a heads up, I don't like you.
It was on the great mountain where my final footsteps did climb.
I, the great warrior Yoa Shang, delivered a fatal blow to my enemy.
My enemy was defeated but so was I...
...for I was a turtle, and I had grown very old.
Now it was time to not live anymore.
It will revolve around Pinkie Pie having to fight Lil B in order to see who will carry the title of The Almighty Pink Chef.
I'm going to get this done as soon as I get around to it.
It's the one without a wifi adapter, but that doesn't matter to me. I'll probably buy one later on but not until I beat all the single player games I've been wanting to beat.
I'm working on Afro Samurai and Requiem and will begin Splatterhouse pretty soon.
I'm hoping to pick up Halo 4 and a recent Dragonball fighter in two weeks.
Tara, if you're reading this, I want you to know that you are my favorite actress to ever exist... ever.
You're beautiful. Oh my God are you beautiful.
You should totally marry me.
I'm a hero among my people. I'm a stronghold when the storms roll in.
You KNOW you want this. You know it.
I'm here for you. All you have to do is message me back and I'll get wedding plans on the way.
10. Excessive cuteness
9. Seeing friends fall in love and "no longer have time" to hangout
8. That I've been single for longer than anyone else I know
7. Feeling like an asshole when I'm happy and everyone else is feeling miserable
6. Teenage girls
5. The fact that I can literally not stop being a fuckface
4. The "YOLO" mentality
3. The neo-nerd, pop culture mentality
2. Addiction (specifically, my own)
1. Not having enough money for cigarettes
Fuck you, I sincerely hate you with a fucking passion that only I can describe.
You don't fucking go away. You fucking stay here and decide to make yourself a fucking home. Well thanks a whole goddamn lot.
You must really love to make my life a living hell, even after I kicked the habit a year ago. The fucking NEED for the stuff keeps coming back.
Oh, did I mention that I don't have any friends in real life that care? Fuck no they don't. They really goddamn don't.
They're just like, "o
Fucking Christ, she was attempting to flirt with me and not seeing that I didn't want to flirt.
Of course, she thought playing "hard to get" would encourage me to go after her; but I'm in no way going to be with a woman who probably already went through menopause.
Honestly, I'm pretty attracted to older women but that doesn't mean I would go any further than a one night thing.
Oh and it had to end with her handing me her number and winking at me, and I almost throwing up.
This is Mariju Ana. He's a Zebra (even though I'm white; but I love me black girls) and lives in Ponyville. He smokes all different of things and spends most of his money on alcohol.
