Let's get one thing straight. This episode clearly did not live up to the hype promised by previous episodes. All the ads and promos feel like the laziest trap to bait-and-switch ratings and viewers. But what makes this almost hilariously tragic are the justifications of why there shouldn't have been such expectations to begin with. But despite as much as I want to, this isn't a rant (for the most part; I would like to save the smack down of that terrible opinion for another time), this is about being constructive so let's do this!

So, the Equestria games are obviously the Equestrian Olympics. What can be done with this to make a good sports episode? The answer is that the F#$%ING OLYMPICS AREN'T JUST ABOUT THE SPORTS!! They are NOT just some gathering of random schmucks that compete to win medals. They are the blood, sweat, and tears of the athletes, trainers, and their families who watch their hard work come to fruition upon the world stage with victories and defeats that mean something in and out of the stadium. If you can't think of a compelling story from those concepts, then I must ask you to give up writing and isolate yourself to producing schlock for children's TV...wait.

Except no! This is FiM damnit. THE show that took seemingly boring and "girly" gimmicks and created interesting, entertaining, and memorable stories. Why can’t the same be done for the Olympics, people?

I'd like to paraphrase a conversation between screenwriters Max Landis (look him up; he does a HILARIOUSLY over-the-top “Death of Superman”) and his dad John Landis:

John: "How do you kill a vampire?"

Max: "Garlic...stake through the heart...sunlight...?"

John: "No. You can kill vampires however the f#$% you want, because they don't f#$%ing exist! You can make up schticks and codes for anything!"

I bring this up because the Equestria Games provides that perfect opportunity to let the imagination run wild. Making up entire civilizations by playing around with their history, the traditions and their limitations both physical and cultural and having just slivers of that play out in interactions with other made up civilizations; All you need the games for are kid friendly stand-ins for global conflict!

But I’m getting ahead of myself. A lot of people liked the “story” that Spike goes through and I’m inclined to kinda agree in the VERY broad strokes (good idea, meh-to-bland execution). So in this version, Spike will be a central issue that fuels the conflict and will lead to a somewhat similar moral of confidence. How can this be done? By utilizing a simple fact of Spike's character: He's a dragon raised in a pony society, with an assumption that he’s one of a kind.

Remember, dragons in MLP are depicted as ruthless, selfish, hostile, territorial, monstrous, and extremely dangerous even when just taking a nap. Now combine this with potential friction of some cultural differences and we can showcase how elaborate and dynamic the world of Equestria can be while staying true to form.

To start off, the first Act begins in the Crystal Empire with only a few short scenes dedicated to everyone getting ready but the main focus is on Spike being treated as a national hero (not with more dialogue-heavy exposition scenes but with a few choice character interactions and imagery to drive the point home). In the next scene we’re introduced to all of Ponyville’s players as cameos but the main opening event is Spike lighting the torch. Now picture this: Spike walks out on the field waving around and feeling all the love. But as he moves closer to the torch, he starts hearing jeers, and boos and even snide insults like “Get that monster off the field!”, “Go back to your cave!”, or “Kick out the beast before he torches the place!”

Spike turns to hear these heckles coming from a somewhat small but vocal section of the stadium many of which bear battle scars. Now the Crystal ponies also hear this and they’re having none of it: they start counter-screaming for Spike but also throwing insults back at the scarred ponies. Around the stadium, some spectators are wary of Spike as a dragon, but others especially ones from Ponyville and Canterlot, become equally defensive on Spike’s behalf. But poor Spike in the middle of all this thinks he did something wrong and seems stuck, almost paralyzed with indecision and anxiety. A quick look at Twilight shows she’s urging him to light the torch but when he gets close to the mouth, the screaming, heckling, and uproar intensifies causing Spike to feel even more pressure and wind up being choked up. Twilight eventually lights the torch herself and rushes out to shunt Spike away into a royal VIP suite as tensions mount further. End of Act I